Due May 2022 (thread 4)

[Bubbasmama2017]

Hi all I hope I've done this right.

@fejkalove just catching up I haven't noticed anything on my notes although my BMI is in over weight category too which was brought up by the midwife but they haven't seemed too concerned at scans. Let us know how you get on! I've got a growth scan on Monday as seeing a consultant so maybe they'll mention it to me then as well.

@luckygreenduck I've had morning sickness again too, when I first got covid last week my taste and smell went and the sickness seemed to go too but it's back with a vengeance the last couple of days!
Also been incredibly tired which I put down to covid but I think is just pregnancy!

@MrsMay19 that is really terrible. I'm sorry you have this added stress! As others have said blood type in particular is important at this stage as you may need an anti D injection at 28 weeks. If your blood is rhesus negative group but the baby's blood is positive group it's an injection they give you to prevent issues in any subsequent pregnancies you may have. Unfortunately you are probably going to have to chase them on it and advocate for yourself, I find that's just how the NHS is now, things don't get followed up unless you chase. Keep ringing GP and midwife team for this. I would consider making a complaint too. Hopefully it might be a case they are on the hospital system somewhere.

I would also recommend ringing the day assessment unit/hospital number if you have it as I have found them really helpful... they might invite you in quickly to get any repeat blood tests done. Good luck and sending hugs!

@Hyggeandhugs I am going on leave pretty much exactly a month before my due date. My due date is 16th May and I'm going on leave after Easter weekend. I don't think it's excessive... after all full term is 37 weeks so baby could come "early". I expect by then I'll be very keen to stop working. I think it's important to have some time to rest and nest before baby arrives.

Awake again at 05:30 for no particular reason... can never seem to sleep past 6am nowadays!

@GinnyBee was just reading back over some earlier comments and yes I am worried too about my husband getting covid before birth and not being allowed with me. It would be devastating if he missed the birth of his child. I think he's going to request working from home from beginning of May. He has to visit lots of people's houses for his work so it's not worth the risk really.

I wonder if he did catch it, would we be able to have a home birth?! I'd almost be tempted by that over him missing it all. I'd be terrified not to be with him.

My main concern at the moment is my diet... I'm just not eating healthy! Too much sugar but I'm craving it so much!

@aNewYorkerInLondon glad you have the keys! How exciting, I don't envy all the back and forth with solicitors moving house but I do love the actual moving in part! Hope everything is going well and enjoy baby shopping.

I still can't choose a pushchair but am collecting a Snuzpod 3 for £50 on Sunday off marketplace so happy with that!

@WorriedMamaToBe I'm thinking of you. I think the advice to post on the pregnancy or parenting forum about this is a good idea as you are more likely to find others who have been through it and can offer advice. I wish you all the best and keep us updated xx

Good morning, @Sarah239. I'm up too.

For me it's because yesterday we got the keys to the house we're renting, which was supposed to be move-in ready, only to find that there is a leak in the roof with active wet spots on the walls, the carpets haven't been steam cleaned, as the realtor promised they would be, and there's mold in one of the bedrooms and wet walls in another. We've had to cancel the painters we hired that were meant to begin at 9am today.

We understand that wall-to-wall carpeting is basically unavoidable in rental property in London, but we find it to be disgusting so we specifically asked if the carpets would be steam cleaned as part of the professional cleaning pre-handover and we're assured it would be.

We were also assured, before we signed the lease, that the owner was having the roof inspected and any repairs would be taken care of before we moved in. Now we're there and she says it'll be weeks before a leak in the chimney is fixed, and in the meantime there's water coming in when it rains! We cannot paint over actively wet walls and all that dampness and mold isn't healthy for anyone, much less so for a pregnant woman or a baby.

Finally, when we were looking at the house, the previous tenant had all their stuff in it so we couldn't measure. The agent said to just use the floor plan on the listing for the room dimensions. Those ended up being wrong, and now the room that was meant to be the guest room / my husband's office is too small to hold both the guest bed and his desk. Now I either need to make that tiny room baby's room and give up my hope of having a cot, chest of drawers, and a comfy nursing chair in the room, or we have to get rid of our very nice guest bed and just not have a guest room, or we have to put the guest bed in the nursery. I hate all three options!

I was sobbing last night. My poor husband was desperate to make me feel better but there's not much one can do at 7pm on a Friday.

So I'm awake.

Oh god @aNewYorkerInLondon that is horrible you definitely don't need to be round the mould. Hopefully the realtor will get there act together and you can start enjoying your new home

Also on topic of fathers missing birth due to covid. I'd be devestated if my DH couldn't come as its our first and he's really looking forward to being a part of Labour. He's even asked midwife if he can cut the cord. I'd need him there to for support as I am petrified of labour. The bigger LO gets the more Im thinking "god he's gotta get out of me" I'm still not sure on pain relief during birth but do want a vagina birth. Although consultant has suggested it may be planned c section due to a medical condition I have. He's gonna review at 36 weeks and let me know.

@aNewYorkerInLondon how awful for you! At this stage you just want a safe place to live for baby and to be able to settle and nest. I had a similar situation before my daughter was born and my family acted like I was being really unreasonable it was so upsetting.
@WorriedMamaToBe I second what people have said about phoning the GP my midwife is so unresponsive I have to call them for any blood results

@aNewYorkerInLondon I'm sorry all this is happening and you were upset last night. I just wanted to give a virtual hug I hate hearing of upset women nevermind when they're pregnant ❤️ hope everything is sorted urgently for you x

Regarding the partners not being at the birth worry, I think it's really unlikely that would happen now as even in the height of covid I think most hospitals were lenient about it. If the government are going to lift all restrictions in a matter of weeks too there's no way they can impose a ban on partners being at the birth of their child, to be honest it's a human right. I also think we should all remember that it's not a case of people letting us do something or not, when it comes to our bodies and the birth of our babies it's up to us what happens. If something doesn't feel right then don't agree to it! I certainly won't be.

I'm almost 💯 sure I'm opting for a home birth now, there's still a fair bit of pain relief you can have at home including gas and air, tens machine and hiring a birthing pool. There is a small chance I may need a c section too though but I won't know until nearer the time. But ultimately I'd be much more comfortable and happy being in my own home

@aNewYorkerInLondon renting in this country is a joke, but you do have rights. Speak to your estate agent ASAP it sounds totally unacceptable. I'd refuse to pay rent until it's sorted or perhaps even refuse to stay there if it's a health hazard. We had a similar problem in our last rented place and I went to the local council in the end who said they'd prosecute the landlord if he didn't sort the glaring health and safety issues!! He soon did

I'm a bit worried about the partners not being able to stay after the birth. I had quite a traumatic few days after I had my daughter and needed my partner there, hopefully it won't be the case that they just have to leave straight after or only during visiting hours etc.

Thank you @Kittycaz, @Bubbasmama2017, @YummyMummyXoX, and @fattycatty82! It's so nice to be able to talk to you all when things are upsetting.

I'm afraid it really was not the case that hospitals were lenient about partners visiting during covid surges as many women will attest to.....

In the majority of places partners were only allowed in for the very final stage of active labour, and that's if they were covid negative, with then very limited visiting on the postnatal wards.

Yes you have a right to choices about your care during labour, but you don't have the right to demand the presence of someone else if they are covid positive and going to put staff and other patients around you at risk.

Sorry to hear, I'm going by what I've heard about my own local hospital. But how can they allow people who have covid to no longer self isolate then not allow people at the birth of their children? They can't lift restrictions on the one hand then not in regard to other things. With the birth choices I meant in regard to where and how we have babies not necessarily being covid positive and going into hospital xx

It's still the case that if you have covid then by law you have to self isolate at home to protect others.

There has been some suggestion in the news that this may become guidance rather than the law in the coming months in England.

That's very different from inviting covid positive partners into hospital where there are vulnerable patients.

@morphe It must have been awful to hear that you have gestational diabetes but, as others have said, it can usually be managed and you can still have a healthy baby❤ I have my test this Tuesday and I'm scared that my results will be positive too as it's definitely not what anyone would hope for but will see what happens. X

@SouthwestSis I feel like your responses have been a little harsh if I'm honest. I've really enjoyed being part of this group and I've found it super supportive and reassuring throughout my pregnancy but not so much the last few exchanges so I think I'll leave the group as I don't want to feel like I'm treading on eggshells with the things I write on here. Wishing you the best of luck in the rest of your pregnancies ladies and healthy happy babies 😊🥰 xx

@aNewYorkerInLondon oh gosh I'm so sorry. That is very upsetting for you and rightly so. I hope it is remedied soon. Wishing you all the best!!

@fattycatty82 I'm sorry you feel that way about the group! Covid is a sensitive subject and hard to navigate especially on an online forum via text. I hope in time you might return but do what you feel is best for you ❤️ I always remember that we had our scans on the same day so consider you my dates buddy! I think the self isolation rules are set to end March 24th (possibly earlier by recent news) but as @SouthwestSis said I doubt that will extend to allowing hospital visits. Of course you're right that no one could stop you having a home birth with your partner even if they were positive (and as I said earlier on, I'd be tempted myself if that was the case). I'm just not sure what would happen with the midwife team as they'd be being exposed if that was the case, but this is all hypothetical and hopefully fingers crossed is not going to happen to any of us! It's such a bloody hard time to be pregnant and thinking about birth with these extra current events isn't it, I feel grateful we are (hopefully) coming out the other side of it now and it's not 2020 or 2021!

I have always thought that politics and money are touchy subjects but that was pre-pandemic. Now covid is definitely also hard to talk about

Also @aNewYorkerInLondon I am certainly not a lawyer but I feel like you'd be within your rights/totally justified in withholding rent until the place is more habitable? These things are often more complicated than you'd hope though so don't take my word on that. Do you have the agreement that was made before you moved in in writing at all (regarding the landlord fixing things)? That might help your case. It feels like, if there was an agreement in place and it wasn't adhered to/things weren't fixed, the landlord at least could have told you that in advance.

I found this link which might help https://england.shelter.org.uk/housingadvice/repairs/issyourhomeefitforr_habitation

Again, sorry you are going through this 😔

Thanks for your kind thoughts everyone, I've started trying to eat more healthily already. I hope everyone else's GTT tests go well! I know I've been mindlessly snacking in the past few months which is easy enough to cut out. The problem with doing healthier meals is that they don't appeal to my older DS so I'll have to prepare it separately.

@fattycatty82 I'm sorry you feel you have to go, I've enjoyed your comments here and I'll miss you. I think everyone is a bit anxious with the expected change in Covid rules and the truth is nobody knows what the situation will be in a few months. I think different hospitals had different policies with partners staying, so you can do a search or post on the main board to find out what's happened recently (but it still might change by May).

My main worry is also about my DH not being there if he tests positive. Our main exposure risk is DD being in nursery, but I'm reluctant to pull her out as she gains so much from it.

@aNewYorkerinLondon the rental problems sound awful, especially the damp! I don't know much about the legal specifics but agree that Shelter is a good organisation to get advice from. With the office/nursery issue, can you find a smaller/folding guest bed that might fit? I know my DD wouldn't have slept comfortably with a guest in her room.

We will be isolating in the run up so DH can be at the birth. I wouldn't want him there if he was covid positive, and he wouldn't want to put the staff and other patients at risk, so a week or so before we will minimise all contact with the outside world.

@aNewYorkerInLondon I know it wasn't your plan, but an adult bed in your nursery could be an absolute blessing. The option of sleeping in there with baby while your DH is in the other room or vice versa can really help on tricky nights. We found it so helpful with our first.

@fattycatty82 good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and hope you are blessed with a beautiful LO.

Morning ladies, My mum brought me a nursing chair I sat in it yesterday and it's so comfy plus it rocks am so happy. Really really debating 4d scan on Tuesday after my 28 week midwife appointment my DH is not so sure as we've heard baby can look a bit smooshed with how far we are, but I feel like I really wanna see him before he's born. Does anyone think 28+4 weeks might be a bit to late. X

Good morning all

I haven't posted on any of the May threads in a while, but I hope you're all well.

@anewyorkerinlondon - I am so sorry to read about your rental home, that sounds like the stuff of nightmare. I really hope you get everything sorted asap, I'm sorry you've had such a disappointing start in your new home. Hopefully there will still be plenty of time to get the painters in and get things decorated just the way you'd hoped.

@fattycatty82 all the best in the rest of the journey if your not back I hope your baby arrives safely in your arms soon ❤️

@RosettaTheGardenFairy mines booked for 28+5 I asked those that have had them when's a good time, they all between 26 and 31 weeks and loved the scans. I hope you and your partner enjoy seeing your baby if you decide to go Xx

@fattycatty82 I hope you feel comfortable enough to stay / return soon💖xxxx

I think I'm a little behind most of you ladies; 26 weeks tomorrow. Do any of you have quieter days than others? I'm starting to panic as I don't think baby has a routine really yet and some days I feel very little (I don't have an anterior placenta) but baby is breech and feet are very low so my movements are a little different.

@fejkalove I'm 26 + 5 and I definitely have days when she doesn't move much and other days where she's jiggling around for ages. There are certain positions that I can get into where I can pretty much guarantee she'll move, like trying to lay on my stomach. Thought I was staying small too, but then I just seemed to wake up at 26wks and boom there was this big firm bump! She was really low at the 20wk scan, so guess she moved. It's freaked me out to be honest how it just suddenly appeared overnight!