Refused Antenatal Scans - Help

[MotherHubbard2020]

NC for this as it is pretty embarrassing.

Anyway, I attended my 12 week scan yesterday at the hospital and was accompanied by my exclusively breastfed baby.

I was refused the scan based on me having a child with me, I asked them to use discretion as my son is exclusively breastfed but the lady was completely dismissive and said it was policy. No children allowed to accompany mum for the unltrasound.

I tried to argue my case asking what the reasoning was, please use discretion and then explained that they had a duty of care and were now refusing my care based on me bringing an exclusively breastfed baby to the appointment. They argued that I had refused my own care as I could’ve left the baby. It got to the point where I asked them to make a note on my record that I had been refused entry to my scan based on me being accompanied by an exclusively breastfed baby. At this point I think the manager panicked and she told a colleague to call security.

As soon as I saw security walking towards me I just left.

Well today I attended my midwifery appointment, the midwife explained they couldn’t do much without the scan information but said the scan department was now refusing to scan me and an incident report had been logged, if I want access to this I need to file a freedom of information request.

I am totally at a loss, I have no idea how far gone I am because I am still breastfeeding and my menstrual cycles have been all over the place plus I’ve started having pain on my lower left side which I explained to my midwife today who advised A and E if it got any worse but explained that the ultrasound department at that hospital are refusing to deal with me so she doesn’t know what would happen.

I am totally at a loss, I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

I've just read all the way to the end of this thread, desperately looking for the answer to the question:

HOOOOOOW OOOOOLDDD ISSSS THE BAAAABBBBBY??????

OP you still haven't answered those questioning how old your baby is.

What was your plan for the child while you were scanned - clearly you couldn't be holding them during a medical procedure. Are they young enough to be strapped into an infant car seat on the floor? What was your plan for if the baby cried and distracted the sonographer who is working to a tight schedule? Were you assuming everyone would just accommodate you and stuff the other patients waiting?

Sorry to be blunt but you sound like one of those women who screeches about exclusively breastfeeding like it makes them super special and so think that the (very reasonable) rules for situations like this don't apply. Let me guess, you expected everyone to fuss around and accommodate you and your baby, wait while you settled and fed them if necessary and generally pandered to you.

Sorry if that's not the case but your posts do come across as one of 'those' mothers.

The rules are there for a reason and I agree with the staff that by refusing to adhere to those rules you were discounting yourself from receiving medical care. They don't refuse all further treatment to a pregnant woman for no good reason so I would bet my house that this exchange wasn't nearly as calm and reasonable as you're making out. Even if it was though, you're still in the wrong and next time need to listen to the rules and not just assume they don't apply to super special breastfeeders. Even if you hoped that, I'm suprised that you didn't phone ahead to double check! Basically there is no way to look at this where you're not in the wrong so you need to suck it up and work out what you do now.

I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

Yes, ask this immediate family member to mind your baby when you have a scan.

Lol @Bleepers

This is where we find out the baby is 48 months

your baby may be ebf, but they aren't going to be attached to your boobs permanently.

Both of mine were ebf, and could have been left with someone, even with dad in the car, for long enough to have a scan.

You did refuse care, by your attitude. You're not the only one who's baby is ebf, so you can't claim a special case. It's no children for some basic, sensible reasons.

So you need to apologise and see if they will then arrange a new date. And leave baby at home, or at a pinch in the car with dad/someone else.

They’ve refused to deal with you going forward? You most definitely were not have a calm discussion with them.

I’m on their side. NHS staff shouldn’t have to deal with abusive patients, ever.

@Bleepers

I've just read all the way to the end of this thread, desperately looking for the answer to the question:

HOOOOOOW OOOOOLDDD ISSSS THE BAAAABBBBBY??????

Sadly, I fear we will never know ...

I'm guessing around 5 or 6

Why couldn't someone wait in the car with your baby? Beyond the newborn weeks, which your baby obviously is, even an exclusively breastfed baby can be left for an hour or two

You are being completely unreasonable. You just can't take children into scans, that's it!

I would love to hear the NHS staffs version of events. Also, absolutely DYING to know how old the ‘baby’ is 😂

How old is your baby? I have had to leave baby on the ward with DH to have scans when I had an ebf newborn. I have also attended hospital appointments where DH had to come along and I feed baby under 6 weeks before I went in and then DH had to distract the baby and the 3 year old while I was having the appointment because I wouldn’t have achieved anything with the appointment otherwise.

How old is the baby?
Cancel the cheque.

If you do ask your immediate family member, they will likely tell you that you are being unreasonable as you cannot take a baby to a scan.

I’m thinking “baby” is around 6 months...
Actually, I’m just waiting to see if the age is ever revealed..............

The baby is probably 7 and has hairy hands...

How old is your baby?

I'm so surprised at people here saying you are being unreasonable - you totally aren't. You should ask for the hospital's policy on supporting admission of breastfeeding mothers / outpatient appointments. There is a big push in the NHS now not to separate mothers from breastfeeding babies (part of the initiative to increase the number of babies being breast fed) so I'm sure they will be monitoring PALS feedback.

definitely agree the baby is going to turn out to be 18 months....how long will OP avoid answering the question for?

She's clearly read the objections on social media etc about separating newborn breastfed babies and their mothers during admissions and decided this applies to her. nothing against this btw - my 6 month old is EBF and we were separated when she was in NICU - its awful, but clearly not the case here.

The scan clinics are generally pretty packed and the sonographers will be ‘in trouble’ with the consultants if the delays in scanning cause a knock on effect on the consultant clinics. They haven’t got the capacity to factor in time for you to stop your scan whilst you breastfeed your baby.

Sorry OP but you are the irrational one in this situation. The rule is no children. You are no different, no matter how your child is fed or whether you have someone to mind them. If the staff make an exception for you then they have to make exceptions for everyone.
I think you owe the staff you abused a very sincere apology.

Dh and I took our under two and three year old to a baby scan. Is this a new policy ?

How can a Sonographer do their job with a possible screaming baby in the background? It isn't a cute fluffy scan it's a medical examination to check if your unborn baby is healthy. Even EBF babies can be left for an hour or two and I'd say from the sound of it your baby must be at least 5 months old so yes you could leave them for an hour or two.

Legit now only following to find out HOWWWW OLLLDDD THEEEE BABBBBY ISSSSSSSS