Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Refused Antenatal Scans - Help

673 replies

MotherHubbard2020 · 12/02/2021 13:43

NC for this as it is pretty embarrassing.

Anyway, I attended my 12 week scan yesterday at the hospital and was accompanied by my exclusively breastfed baby.

I was refused the scan based on me having a child with me, I asked them to use discretion as my son is exclusively breastfed but the lady was completely dismissive and said it was policy. No children allowed to accompany mum for the unltrasound.

I tried to argue my case asking what the reasoning was, please use discretion and then explained that they had a duty of care and were now refusing my care based on me bringing an exclusively breastfed baby to the appointment. They argued that I had refused my own care as I could’ve left the baby. It got to the point where I asked them to make a note on my record that I had been refused entry to my scan based on me being accompanied by an exclusively breastfed baby. At this point I think the manager panicked and she told a colleague to call security.

As soon as I saw security walking towards me I just left.

Well today I attended my midwifery appointment, the midwife explained they couldn’t do much without the scan information but said the scan department was now refusing to scan me and an incident report had been logged, if I want access to this I need to file a freedom of information request.

I am totally at a loss, I have no idea how far gone I am because I am still breastfeeding and my menstrual cycles have been all over the place plus I’ve started having pain on my lower left side which I explained to my midwife today who advised A and E if it got any worse but explained that the ultrasound department at that hospital are refusing to deal with me so she doesn’t know what would happen.

I am totally at a loss, I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Ginfordinner · 13/02/2021 09:49

From the NHS website:

Most hospitals do not allow children to attend scans as childcare is not usually available. Please ask your hospital about this before your appointment.

UnbeatenMum · 13/02/2021 09:54

Is there another hospital reasonably locally to you that you could have your care transferred to? Where I live I would have the choice of two.

Greenmarmalade · 13/02/2021 11:35

@Stressedoutsomuch yes! Particularly during a pandemic.

Greenmarmalade · 13/02/2021 11:40

Why the mean tone and jokes to OP?

If the baby is having solids at 6-8 months, they’ll still need a lot of milk feeds.
If the baby is teething- may want a lot of feeds.
Mother may not be ok leaving the baby with the available person, and vice versa.

I do not understand the reasons for posters getting so upset about OP’s decisions. I am concerned she’s been unfairly and insensitively treated by HCP, and that she is now left in pain with concerns about her wellbeing and her baby’s- this is worthy of upset, not bringing a baby to a hospital appointment.

Babyboomtastic · 13/02/2021 12:11

If someone is so against leaving their child for even half an hour whilst they have a scan, perhaps they should have waited for longer to have a baby. What if they need admitting to hospital for something during the pregnancy? What if they end up on mandatory bed rest which would mean baby needing childcare?

readyforroundtwo · 13/02/2021 12:16

@grey12 just because the country you are/were in allowed children at scans it doesn't mean hospitals here allow it.

They were strict with this rule before Covid, but now its even more obvious why these rules apply, surely?

Parker231 · 13/02/2021 12:17

It’s irrelevant whether the baby is ebf. The majority of hospitals state you cannot bring children to a scan appointment.

DumplingsAndStew · 13/02/2021 12:53

@MotherHubbard2020

PLEEEEEEASE come back and tell us how old the baby is. Its my only wish in life.

grey12 · 13/02/2021 13:35

[quote readyforroundtwo]@grey12 just because the country you are/were in allowed children at scans it doesn't mean hospitals here allow it.

They were strict with this rule before Covid, but now its even more obvious why these rules apply, surely?[/quote]
My question was different. The rule is there, ok. But why?

It seems to me like a nonsensical rule. Pregnant women a lot of times have small children they're taking care of and a lot of times women may not have an option of just leaving the child with a partner who is working, or a parent who may be unwell or working as well.

Ginfordinner · 13/02/2021 13:39

PLEEEEEEASE come back and tell us how old the baby is. Its my only wish in life.

Grin

Either the OP is embarrassed that she got pregnant so quickly after giving birth, or her baby is well over 6 months and can manage without a breastfeed for an hour or two.

Starstella21 · 13/02/2021 13:42

I've never understood why people bring Children to scans, the sonographers are doing a really specific and important job and I just don't think it's appropriate to have children at scans. What if you receive bad news?
I don't understand why you couldn't leave the baby with somebody for your scan? Nhs are currently not allowing children in any departments unless they are a patient due to Covid and I think given the current situation in this country that should be respected.

Greenmarmalade · 13/02/2021 13:47

The glee with which posters are responding with their negativity... what is this about?

readyforroundtwo · 13/02/2021 14:19

@grey12 if you meant why is the rule there at all (pre covid) its probably a lot to do with the fact that if they make exceptions for babies, what about older children.
Should there just no restrictions at all and a woman can bring 2, 3 or 4 children with her? A baby in a pram that can't get out is one thing but toddlers or even 4 year olds running around and causing distraction is just an irritation and really unfair for the sonographer trying to do their job. I'm not sure if you've ever been treated in an NHS hospital over here, but it's like a circus a lot of the time. Manic places, where unfortunately a lot of people bring a whole crowd of people with them, often appointments overrun sometimes by so much as an hour etc. The hospitals try to run to an extremely tight schedule and the more people and chaos, the slower and more painful the experience. In addition to this, a lot of pregnant woman going in for scans are either extremely anxious, feeling unwell, tired etc. and it's not the place for children. If everyone was allowed to bring their kids imagine the waiting rooms, children not only taking up seats of pregnant women that need to sit down, on top of that having to wait up to an hour for the scan.

FinalSongbird · 13/02/2021 15:58

Our NHS has always stated NO CHILDREN and one adult, even pre covid.

WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot1 · 13/02/2021 16:00

@MotherHubbard2020

I rang the ultrasound department again and asked to speak to the superintendent sonographer, apparently she wasn’t there but I was told by the admin lady that they wouldn’t be scanning me anymore at that hospital.

Pain in lower left side getting worse and not sure what to do.

So what you're trying to imply is you may have an ectopic pregnancy.

If this is the case and you need an operation quite urgently, what will be done with your child at this point? He can't be fed whilst you're having an operation, which will take longer than a scan. And the drugs used will surely mean no breastfeeding after.

If this is the case, get yourself to a hospital. Without child.

However, the fact you continually ignore the age question definitely has me thinking your laptop is plugged in under a bridge. Or you were denied care but your kid is not EBF.

TurquoiseDragon · 13/02/2021 16:42

@Ginfordinner

PLEEEEEEASE come back and tell us how old the baby is. Its my only wish in life. Grin

Either the OP is embarrassed that she got pregnant so quickly after giving birth, or her baby is well over 6 months and can manage without a breastfeed for an hour or two.

This is what I thought.

And for a hospital to say they refuse to scan her there, shows that whatever OP says, it was quite a serious incident. I've only heard of people bening banned from a hospital for something serious.

I know a hospital wouldn't be able to respond, but I would love to hear their side.

grey12 · 13/02/2021 16:46

@readyforroundtwo I suppose.... still think it's excessive to refuse children in.

DD3 was born in UK so I do have experience with NHS. Older sisters went a couple of times to see midwife. Was that so wrong?

kittensmittens1 · 13/02/2021 16:53

How old is baby?

readyforroundtwo · 13/02/2021 16:54

@grey12 I think it's a difficult one because some people's older children are really well behaved and some a bit more challenging. Also, a routine midwife appointment is slightly more relaxed than a scan appointment. Imagine going to a scan where you are told your baby is dead and your other children are with you.

TurquoiseDragon · 13/02/2021 17:07

@kittensmittens1

How old is baby?
OP's been asked that several time and hasn't bothered answering.
Hammonds · 13/02/2021 17:13

Some of the reptiles on here are horrible and go much further than just replying to some one on a thread. If you feel that you have to be nasty, scathing or aggressive maybe you need a break from MN or take moment to actually look at what your posting and if your actually say it to some ones face. Some of you are actually trolling the OP yourselves.

Whisky it might be a troll but it also might not be and your post is awful. Do you speak like that to people in RL?

Windchangeface · 13/02/2021 17:18

OP I’m usually the last to say this but you’re a massive drama queen!

I had a 5 month old EBF baby when I had to go to the hospital for a EPU emergency scan due to bleeding. I ended up having several more over the space of a month due to complications.

My son had never been apart from me and also refused bottles. I also didn’t have the luxury of advance notice. I had to beg borrow and steal someone to come with me and watch him in the car outside whilst I nipped in as he wasn’t allowed in. It’s just how it is.

I would have some sympathy for you if you were a totally isolated single parent with no childcare options or family/friends but you have already said you left your toddler with someone.

No reason you couldn’t have packed toddler, baby sitter and baby in car and left them in the car park with a bag of snacks and toys. You’d have been gone 20-30 minutes Max.

You literally just rocked up with total entitlement and harassed the NHS staff in the middle of a worldwide pandemic. You should be refused care!

kittensmittens1 · 13/02/2021 17:20

@TurquoiseDragon I know, I've read the thread. Weird isn't it?

handsforfeet · 13/02/2021 17:27

@MotherHubbard2020 you need to call 111.

Then your gp or midwife will need to sort the issue of the scans for you. Is there another hospital trust you can transfer your care to?
Please don't contact the sonographer again.

Kitkat151 · 13/02/2021 17:34

[quote grey12]@readyforroundtwo I suppose.... still think it's excessive to refuse children in.

DD3 was born in UK so I do have experience with NHS. Older sisters went a couple of times to see midwife. Was that so wrong?[/quote]
Pre Covid it was fine for general midwife Appointments with others children.....but scans are clinical interventions .....they take place in rooms with very expensive equipment.....it is vitally important that sonographers are not distracted as they are taking detailed measurements and looking in minute detail at organs.....f they miss an anomaly it could lead to a potential death of a foetus....also it is extreme
Y important that these clinics run to time as much as they can....chiLoren
and babies are unpredictable....they cry and need soothing....they touch things.....it is a health and safety issue ......you can’t take children in when you have other clinical interventions so why are maternity scans any different....surely you can understand the reasoning behind all of this?