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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Refused Antenatal Scans - Help

673 replies

MotherHubbard2020 · 12/02/2021 13:43

NC for this as it is pretty embarrassing.

Anyway, I attended my 12 week scan yesterday at the hospital and was accompanied by my exclusively breastfed baby.

I was refused the scan based on me having a child with me, I asked them to use discretion as my son is exclusively breastfed but the lady was completely dismissive and said it was policy. No children allowed to accompany mum for the unltrasound.

I tried to argue my case asking what the reasoning was, please use discretion and then explained that they had a duty of care and were now refusing my care based on me bringing an exclusively breastfed baby to the appointment. They argued that I had refused my own care as I could’ve left the baby. It got to the point where I asked them to make a note on my record that I had been refused entry to my scan based on me being accompanied by an exclusively breastfed baby. At this point I think the manager panicked and she told a colleague to call security.

As soon as I saw security walking towards me I just left.

Well today I attended my midwifery appointment, the midwife explained they couldn’t do much without the scan information but said the scan department was now refusing to scan me and an incident report had been logged, if I want access to this I need to file a freedom of information request.

I am totally at a loss, I have no idea how far gone I am because I am still breastfeeding and my menstrual cycles have been all over the place plus I’ve started having pain on my lower left side which I explained to my midwife today who advised A and E if it got any worse but explained that the ultrasound department at that hospital are refusing to deal with me so she doesn’t know what would happen.

I am totally at a loss, I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 23:15

And the OP said she went for a scan - not a booking in appointment @Hammonds

Hammonds · 12/02/2021 23:21

DoItAfraid like you said trusts are different. You can only go off your experience and other posters can go off on theirs.

At our trust the scan is done first then they are told to go and wait in the antinatal area for booking in, it really can be a few hours from start to finish. The anti natal area is shared with Gynae and is a mixed of women all using the same consultants. There is always children there - pregnant women with children and Gynae women with children because some women really don’t have childcare.

AntiHop · 12/02/2021 23:22

@Hammonds

DoItAfraid a 12 week scan is most often the booking in appointment too. In our unit you could be sat there a few hours.

Booking appointments are being done on the phone due to covid.

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 23:24

@Hammonds

DoItAfraid like you said trusts are different. You can only go off your experience and other posters can go off on theirs.

I am not suggesting that there are people who don't have childcare? I am not even sure what you are arguing with me for? She did have childcare - for her other child - she said so. Secondly, if she thought it would be a problem why didnt she call ahead and discuss it before the appointment and explain her circumstances? Thirdly, what was the plan - hold the baby while being scanned? How would that work? Finally - what level of kicking off do you think it takes to be banned from the hospital? Surely you can see that's quite extreme?

I am not sure what your issue with me is I am just making the point that there were a number of workarounds that could have been arranged that would have resulted in a better outcome for the OP.

Hammonds · 12/02/2021 23:25

@DoItAfraid

And the OP said she went for a scan - not a booking in appointment *@Hammonds*

I never said she did.

Noideamuma · 12/02/2021 23:26

Classic long time lurker never posted but this has got my goat:

Mum of EBF baby - refused bottle, I could still confidently leave him for an hour or so with dad/relative for a break from about 6 weeks and he would survive.
No reliable childcare without the pandemic, just dad and I but would make something work in this situation (I.e. dad take time off work)
IVF baby - trying for a second so appreciate infertility struggles/difficult outcomes of scans so would never take my baby/toddler to scans as this could upset other expectant mothers. (but appreciate this is a personal thing)
Still want to know how old baby is!

Hammonds · 12/02/2021 23:26

DoItAfraid I’m not sure why your so ragey tbh

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 23:46

@Hammonds

DoItAfraid I’m not sure why your so ragey tbh

Instead of answering the potentially valid points I raised you've decided to call me ragey? Why don't you put across your view point? It's a discussion isn't it?

Tombero · 13/02/2021 00:18

I’ve been trying to ignore this, but I’ll bite.
When my dd was 12 weeks old and exclusively breast fed, I had to go to hospital for emergency surgery.
I was nil by mouth, in surgery then recovery, then on a drip etc to replenish fluids. I reckon she had to go at least 6 hours without a feed.
The whole team did all they could to support me feeding her, private room, fluids for as long as possible before surgery etc. It really mattered to them to support a breast feeding mother. And dd was teasy and very hungry but she coped.
So this post which disparages the efforts of nhs teams to support mothers and which seems very self entitled really annoys me. I’m sure you could have managed to attend a short scan alone.

WhoWh0 · 13/02/2021 02:32

@MotherHubbard2020
I hope you are receiving care currently for your abdominal pain.

Also:
How old is your EBF baby?

Reinventinganna · 13/02/2021 02:52

Have you been checked out today @MotherHubbard2020

Bluntness100 · 13/02/2021 06:02

Op, I think if you’re genuinely suffering pain then go to a&e. Hospitals cannot withhold treatment in an emergency.

But crikey what a day you had out. Defintely one for the diary

Brought child to the scan when told not to
Tried to bizarrely claim child was ebf when in all likely hood the child was clearly well over six months and everyone knew just by looking would be eating solids.
Escalated it by trying to claim said a much older child was actually a baby
Got abusive/aggressive to staff when they tried to explain scan would need to be postponed.
Had security called on you.
Scarpered when you saw them coming to escort you out
Was so serious you Had an incident logged about you.
Staff now refusing to scan you in future due to your behaviour.

Defintely one for the diary 😂

namechangerforthisconfessionn · 13/02/2021 07:03

@DumplingsAndStew

Am shocked you managed to put the baby down long enough to get knocked up.

Dandelion3 · 13/02/2021 07:33

NHS staff are under so much pressure at the moment, they have policies for a reason and the staff are just trying to do their job at the end of the day in an extremely busy often high pressure environment. I'm sure they can make exceptions sometimes in exceptional circumstances but you atleast have to have the courtesy to ring to discuss this before your appointment.

I'm sorry you are in pain and I hope you go to hospital to have this assessed

Dandelion3 · 13/02/2021 07:35

Also I don't know if your situation would count as "exceptional" as you've not really provided enough info eg your access to childcare / age of baby

StopTouchingYourFairyGarden · 13/02/2021 07:39

I phoned for my scan yesterday and was told about 20 times no children are allowed to accompany. I'll need to find somewhere for my children to go for an hour. A friend or neighbour or a babysitter. Exceptions are allowed for this even in lockdown.

I don't understand why you think the rules don't apply to you because your baby is BF? The appointment was an hour or two at most...?

Ginfordinner · 13/02/2021 08:08

@Tombero the OP's baby would have been older than 12 weeks as she was going for a 12 week scan.

Sexnotgender · 13/02/2021 08:34

@Dandelion3

Also I don't know if your situation would count as "exceptional" as you've not really provided enough info eg your access to childcare / age of baby

They had childcare. Someone has their toddler.

Dandelion3 · 13/02/2021 08:35

@Sexnotgender
Sorry I must have missed that bit
Well clearly not any exceptional circumstances then

PlinkPlink · 13/02/2021 08:42

I had to go for a check up after I gave birth to DD. I had a perineal tear (which healed on its own thank goodness). I had to go alone...

DD was 6 weeks at the time. She was EBF. DP took her. I didn't want to expose her to Covid anyway.

EBF is not an excuse to ignore hospital policy. It is awkward, yes. But you can express a bottle if need be and leave baby with a neighbour/friend/family.

Sexnotgender · 13/02/2021 08:43

@PlinkPlink

I had to go for a check up after I gave birth to DD. I had a perineal tear (which healed on its own thank goodness). I had to go alone...

DD was 6 weeks at the time. She was EBF. DP took her. I didn't want to expose her to Covid anyway.

EBF is not an excuse to ignore hospital policy. It is awkward, yes. But you can express a bottle if need be and leave baby with a neighbour/friend/family.

This. I EBF my son, several medical appointments my husband took him so I could go alone. Despite not taking a bottle he survived.

Stressedoutsomuch · 13/02/2021 08:54

Just because some one was able to have her toddler doesn’t mean they were willing to take a baby also.

People on MN must live in a bubble where people are climbing over themselves offering child care. What a lovely world to live in

StopTouchingYourFairyGarden · 13/02/2021 09:08

People on MN must live in a bubble where people are climbing over themselves offering child care. What a lovely world to live in

And someone people live in a world where they are so incredibly special that rules don't apply to them. Now that is a lovely world to live in.

Warrickdaviesasplates · 13/02/2021 09:26

@Stressedoutsomuch

Just because some one was able to have her toddler doesn’t mean they were willing to take a baby also.

People on MN must live in a bubble where people are climbing over themselves offering child care. What a lovely world to live in

Then op should have phoned the hospital and either had the scan rearranged for a time when she could get childcare or asked if she would be able to bring the baby.

I'm interested to know where the father of her children is, she's got two kids and is pregnant again so there has to be at least one father, (unless all three were conceived by sperm donor) why couldn't he look after the children? Men are allowed to take time off to attend scans and appointments where needed, he could have taken annual leave, or even used his lunch hour or something, it's not impossible.

grey12 · 13/02/2021 09:40

@gypsywater

Of course you cant have a child at a scan!

Why not???!!!!

I always took DD1 to ALL gynaecology and ultrasound appointments of DD2. It was in another country and she would just sit in her pushchair during the consultation.

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