Pregnant After MMC - Thread 3

[Sakura54]

New thread for anyone pregnant after MMC.

Here’s our current list of 12/20 week scan dates and due dates.

Scan dates:
@Poppy10121 Thursday 1st October
@Sakura54 Wednesday 7th October 2.40pm
@bubblybon20 Tuesday 13th October 11:10am
@Dancem1 Thursday 15th October
@ew1990 Tuesday 20th October
@SkyBlue20 Tuesday 27th October, 1:20pm

Due dates:
@bubblybon20 - 27/02/21 Boy
@Sakura54 - 28/02/21
@DanceM1 - 04/03/21
@ew1990 - 12/03/21
@SkyBlue20 - 13/03/21
@PhotoMum4 - 18/03/21
@smileyT - 18/03/21
@Poppy10121 - 08/04/21

@workinmama oh sorry about your husband. I have days where I feel like that's its awful. My partner works 6 days a week and the day he's off is one of my working days so sometimes it feels like I never get 5 minutes to myself. DD had started following me everywhere! I go toilet and there she is lol.

@pugprincess yay to the scan! So happy. I honestly feel a sign of relief when we get another successful scan.

I'm so tired I'm about to get in bed and try and get an early night 😩

Oh and has anyone got a painful cervix? It feels sometimes like it's being pinched From the inside. I had this with DD but when she was a lot bigger and used to kick it. Maybe because babies so low it may be kicking it im not sure. I was supposed to ask the midwife when I had my phone appointment. There was so many questions and I had and then typically when she rang I forgot them all 🙈

Evening everyone! So much to catch up on, it’s great!

@Poppy10121 Ooh yes do report back on the dungarees! I’ve seen some I love on both H&M and Mango but they’re never in stock in my size 😒

@DanceM1 I wonder what the significance of lifts in dreams is 🤔 I also don’t feel like a ‘real’ pregnant lady - thinking after the 20 week scan and once my bump pops, I might maybe? And then we’ll be half way through! 😱 So sorry to hear about your friends 💕

@Smilingdonkey I didn’t hear Elizabeth Day but I do love her and how open she is about her miscarriages and fertility struggles.

@Threnody @Simmy20 Sorry to hear about the bleeds, ladies. Sending lots of positive thoughts and strength to you both, hope it settles and it’s just one of those things. Threnody, what a terrible doctor!! Xx

@Lu93 I’m afraid I have no experience or advice but hope everything is ok.
My gums aren’t bleeding but they are so sensitive! Finally applied for my prescription exemption so going to make a dentist appt ASAP - I’m well overdue a check up anyway, had one booked then lockdown hit.

@Sakura54 What a scheduling nightmare, how annoying!

@Lrr31 I’m right there with you, I’m constantly worrying that something has gone wrong. It’s a hard time as we’re feeling a bit more normal and not feeling movement yet. I think I’m more anxious as I have a scan next week - I seem to be feeling more and more worried the closer we get to it.

@Workingmama1 Hope your daughter is ok and her test comes back negative. I’d be mad at your DH, too! They just don’t get it sometimes do they?! Mine is generally really good but the other day he started telling me that to feel less tired I need to get to bed earlier, get up earlier and find the time to exercise...I tried very calmly to explain that it’s not that kind of tiredness. I think he realised his mistake and soon shut up 😂

@Pugprincess Congratulations! Absolutely thrilled for you 💕 How lovely you got to hear the heartbeat too and fab that the haemotoma has cleared!

I’m 17 weeks tomorrow, when did that happen?! 😵 Booked in my flu and whooping cough jabs today for two weeks’ time, doc wants to do them both at the same time so I’m prepared for very achey arms! Counting down to next Friday now for our private scan - I just want to know everything is ok, I’m worrying. Next Fri would also have been my due date for the last pregnancy so between that and Chrissy Tiegen and John Legend’s news being everywhere, I think it’s all just feeling very precarious. I feel in my heart of hearts all will be ok but that could just be hope. Let’s hope the next week flies past and it’s another successful scan 🤞🏼

Guys you know how I thought I was 11+2, well now the babies measuring 11+4 do I go with that now? So today I would be 11+5? I have no AF date to go from remember cause of falling preg straight from mc.

@SkyBlue20 bless you, remember Chrissy had a month (I think?) of heavy heavy blood loss before the worst happened. She said things weren’t the best or right from day 1 as her placenta was weak. Do you get growing pains (mild cramps for me) each day? I’m kind of using that as my reassurance until movements are felt as with my mc I recall growing pains all stopped last couple of weeks 😔 hope that helps x

@Workingmama1 ahhh men 🙈 bound to clash when it’s the end of the week and you’re both tired and/or poorly etc I guess, I know me and DH do. Deep breaths. Mine said I wish the baby would stop making you lazy 😮😅 I’m like no I’m not lazy I’m exhausted there’s a difference 😂🙈 I read once our bodies are using more energy when resting than a person doing exercise! Maybe throw that one at him 😂

@Threnody and @Simmy20 How are you both doing this morning?

@Smilingdonkey I’ve not heard of that lady but I applaud anyone who is open (like Chrissy and John) about these matters as I don’t think enough are. I posted about my mc on my instagram as I felt I needed to share my grief and I also felt robbed of my 12 week announcement. I think it helps others too and lots of friends came forward to say they had experienced loss too. It’s so common yet so hidden x

@DanceM1 so sorry for your 2 friends and their partners/families.

Just checked my ovulation dates and I had my peaks on 26/27th July so if I count from 27th July like I originally did and add on the 2 weeks before ovulation (was slightly longer in reality due to having the mc) then I’m bang on 11+5 today which is what the baby should measure today based on yesterday’s scan. I originally was going by Monday as my weekly milestone but I delayed to Wednesday after my first epu scan dated the baby smaller. Now I’m thinking it’s either caught up or they weren’t accurate at beginning when so small which I know is a thing. X

Also weird dream alert. I took a pregnancy test that tells you your due date 😅 mine came up 21st April. Let’s see if that comes true lol

@Pugprincess I think exactly as you say when they do an early scan (eg EPU) everything is so small it’s not accurate whereas when they do the dating scan they can properly measure and see enough development to be a lot more certain so I would go with the new dates you’ve been given - that’s what I’m doing anyway 😊

I was awake in the night for ages googling NT measurements - for some reason I decided to have a look at the scan notes yesterday and saw that they said the NT measurement was normal - but I still googled it (why!?) and now can’t stop thinking it’s the higher end of normal (2.3mm) and combined with my age that might put me at higher risk. Really annoyed with myself for this new worry but I can’t stop thinking about it! Hopefully I’ll get the actual results soon.

@Poppy10121 im pretty certain mine was 2.3mm too... i googled in the waiting room after the scan and had the same worry as you but i came back very low risk... around 1 in 10000 for one and 1 in 100000 for another i think?!

@Poppy10121 aw thanks that’s settled then I’m 11+5 today yay nice to skip a couple of days lol. Ah Dr Google strikes again 😩 so hard isn’t it. This is why I’m thinking of not having the tests. As I don’t think I would do anything with the info anyway. Also I spoke to midwife sonographer yesterday and she knew of a lady who was told her baby had a high chance of downs as the NT and heart wasn’t right but baby was fine when born. So it’s never definite. Someone else may have chosen to abort that baby based on that information! Assuming she didn’t have the needle test though. You would do that before abortion. Although that carries a mc risk and that’s not a risk I want to take based on someone misinforming me x

So after Monday 12 weeks am I in second trimester or is that 13 weeks?

Thanks @DanceM1 I really need to stop googling things - the first article I read said anything up to 3.5mm is normal but then some threads on MN said different and started to worry me! I am 35 so according to lots of the risk tables I think I start to just be classed at higher risk anyway! It’s like I can’t relax and just actually believe this pregnancy is going to result in a healthy baby, have to keep finding potential problems 😞

@Pugprincess i always used to think 12 weeks was end of first trimester but my app didn’t start saying “second trimester” until after 13 weeks. I guess that makes sense if it’s 39 weeks in total, each trimester would be 13!

Morning!

Dreamt last night my MIL died of a heart attack 😫 Seriously, these dreams!!!

@Pugprincess You’re right and I know Chrissy T had the bleeding and placenta problems but there’s no telling my head that, I think it’s just scanxiety. Trying really hard not to let it take hold though. No real regular cramps anymore but bump is definitely still growing and I’m still exhausted and have really sore boobs, so there are signs. I think it’s just after last time, it’s always going to be a worry. But like I say, trying to keep them as fleeting thoughts and not let them take hold. Flutter on by horrible thoughts!
With your dates I’d go from the new measurements until you have your dating scan - almost at the 12 week point! 🥳
We were really open about our MMC too with friends and family and I think next Friday I’m going to put something on FB as it’s the start of baby loss awareness week and would also have been my due date so just seems to fit. I just feel people should be able to talk about it if they want to but it’s still seen as almost taboo to do so. It’s so important to know where that support is if it happens to you, which is impossible without people speaking about it!

@Poppy10121 Google is terrible, isn’t it?! I heard that up to 3.5 is normal so 2.3 shouldn’t be anything to worry about ☺️ I know what you mean though re: finding potential problems, I think it’s almost wanting to be extra prepared in case of anything - I was the same with our results. But what will be, will be. The odds are in our favour and we all deserve a smooth pregnancy after last time. Hope your results are all perfect and you hear soon. Our trust doesn’t send you your blood results unless they’re high and I also didn’t get them at my 16 week appt, which I’ve decided I quite like despite me being a planner and usually needing all of the information available to me.

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend planned, mine’s basically going to be spent eating all the time 😂

@SkyBlue20 yhhh tbh I’m in my scan honeymoon phase so no doubt that will wear off within a week and I’ll be back to my anxious state 😩

@poppy10121 I think it's 3 or 3.5mm that really starts ringing alarm bells so I wouldn't be to worried. Also you were measuring at 13 weeks or more I think were you so you'll have a higher nt than someone just touching 12 weeks as baby will be bigger!

@skyblue20, in still in the bad dreams club, last night it was that everything went wrong again but very vivid. Couldn't get back to sleep after that.

@pugprincess I'd go off your new dates until your 12 week scan. My first early scans dates me back 3 days from my lmp date but then my dating scan only 1 day. To be honest a couple of days either way is tiny. When is your 12 week scan, must be coming up soon?

Think I might book a scan for 16 weeks, I want to know if the hematoma is still there or not and check baby is doing ok. I'm 13+1 today so not going to book it yet, maybe will with a week or two to go.

On the MN Facebook group for April some people are buying prams and all sorts already. I can't bring myself to order maternity leggings (though I'm in my old tatty ones) let one anything for the baby, even a babygrow!

Hah scan honeymoon phase is real! I think mine has literally just warn off ahead of my 16 week midwife appointment. Those that have had theirs, did they listen to the heartbeat? I read on baby centre that they don’t always do that, I really hope mine does just to chill me out a little. I’ve stupidly been googling like a mad woman again and got myself terrified something will be wrong at the next scan. I know anxiety really isn’t good for the baby, it’s just so hard to put into practice.

One thing that has been great during this trimester, now I don’t feel like I’m gonna vom or need to nap constantly, yoga. I’m a yoga instructor and not doing any really killed me but now I’m feeling better, I’ve found some good videos for second trimester - one I like as it talked about how to use your breath in labour. Happy to share, if anyone is interested, or if anyone wants anymore info about yoga while pregnant 👍

@Workingmama1 they haven’t sent me my 12 week scan date yet 😩 looking like I’ll be 13/14 weeks by the time I get to have that one. Xx

My mother and sister in law have admitted to already buying baby bits 🙈 I must admit I found ideas for my pregnancy reveal photo last night to send to family/friends that don’t know and post on our social media’s. Going with a personalised rainbow baby baby grow, a bandana for my dog that reads ‘I’m getting a human’ and a scan pic. I won’t actually do it till after the nhs scan but I think I will have to order things soon as the baby grows take up to ten days to arrive. Hate to feel like I’m cursing it though xx

Loving the high activity in our thread!

@SkyBlue20 You can find out the sex next week that means! Late MC is so, so unlikely and the fact that they can discover and see something wrong with the baby at this stage is highly unlikely too, but it’s understandable to be worried.

There’s no reason the jabs should be done on the same day. My arm ached pretty badly for 1 day after the flu jab, but then was fine after as long as I didn't lift/stretch it. I’ve had to avoid sleeping on my left side for days because of it. I’m still not sure if I’m getting the other jab next week. It’s interesting how it changed from only being able to get it at 28w before to 16w these days. I reckon the later, the better so might wait.

@Pugprincess You’ll deffo have a successful 12 week scan and that’s good the hematoma is gone. Not good that it hasn’t been arranged yet though.

At 7w EPU dated me back by 5 days, so I followed that, then at 12w scan I went forward by 6 days so that was pointless, but quite interesting how somewhat accurate LMP is. 12w is the point we all want to reach, but 13w is the start of the 2nd trimester.

@Workingmama1 Sorry you’re part of the bad dreams club, they’re awful, aren’t they?! A 16 week scan sounds like a good plan ☺️ I’m having mine at 17+6, probably would have gone earlier but we wanted to do it on our last due date.
I saw on the March group on here that people are buying prams etc already - we’re not even nearly thinking about looking at them until after the 20 week scan and not buying until later. We did allow ourselves to buy one item of clothing that we loved after the 12 week scan, then saw a hat we couldn’t resist while away last weekend but that’s it really. I regretted not having anything to remember last baby by so we thought that even if all goes wrong, these would be nice little mementos.
We’ve made it quite clear to everyone we don’t want anything buying until after we have that ok (I’m really superstitious at the best of times) but I think my mum has been sneakily snatching up a few bits, which is sweet - and she hasn’t given them to us yet as she knows how we feel. It’s weird isn’t it? You know it won’t make any difference to the outcome but it just so feels like tempting fate.

@Lrr31 They didn’t listen to the heartbeat at mine, said they will at the next one at 25 weeks though. I think a lot of places stopped doing it as it can still be easily missed at this stage which obviously just causes more worry.
I’m a big yoga fan in every day life and loving it during pregnancy, it’s about all I can muster up the energy to do really and really helps to de stress.

@Pugprincess Your pic sounds lovely 🥰 I’m sure everything will be perfect at the dating scan but know what you mean - it feels like a real milestone getting past that. We just sent the scan pic around when we told everyone but to tell our parents the sex I want to take a bit of a more exciting pic - I’m thinking the cat next to a little board that says ‘I’m getting a baby sister/brother’ or something but odds are she won’t pose for it so it’ll just be a text 😂

@Sakura54 Yeah, we’re finding out! It’s so weird that this time next week we’ll know. Husband has been adamant it’s a boy but he now has girl creeping in to his mind. I’m unsure but would be slightly leaning towards girl if pushed, mainly because that’s what all the (unreliable) old wives’ tales say 😂 Plus I can really imagine DH surrounded by girls (even the cat is a girl). Happy either way though, will just be happy it’s healthy 🥰 Thank you for the reassurance, you’re so right, the odds are so heavily in our favour. I hate that the MMC has ruined all of this for us - never have I been and never will I be that woman that is excited for scans, I find them anxiety-inducing and feel like I don’t enjoy them as much as others do when I’m in there as it’s more of a relief than anything else.
I think the jabs are same day just because the docs want me to visit once rather than twice - they’re being very very cautious around Covid, mainly doing video appointments where possible and staggering in-person appts etc.

What a miserable, rainy day it is here! I’m still in my comfies just having a lazy day, I don’t think you can do much else when it’s that gross out!

Thank you @Sakura54 for the info 👍🏻

Came home from shopping and had an nhs letter on doormat 😁 12 week scan is Monday 12th October at 1.50pm. So I will be 13 weeks then xx 😚

Haha @SkyBlue20 have you seen the grandparent reveal presents you can get? Have a look on eBay! I’ve just ordered my reveal bits and a card for my nephew with a dinosaur on and an egg that you scratch off and it says underneath you are going to be a big cousin 😁

Eeeek @Pugprincess that’s not long at all to wait! So exciting!!
Ooh I haven’t seen the grandparent reveals no, will have a look. They know we’re going for the scan and will find out the sex so will have to be something we can text as they won’t want to wait until next time we see them - we’ve already had to tell them it’s a slightly later scan time just so we have a chance to digest and sort something before they’re on pins waiting 😂 It doesn’t have to be anything major, I just fancy something a bit more exciting than a text saying ‘it’s a girl’ or ‘it’s a boy’ to make it a bit more special and more of a moment for them.
I’m not really a gender reveal event type person but after the 20 week scan we want to tell my little brother and sister (aged 7 and 4) and my god children (10 and 7) about the pregnancy and am trying to think of a fun way to do that for them. Thinking maybe cupcakes of some sort as what kid doesn’t love cake? 🤔

@Pugprincess We ordered this for our nephew. I think he’s too young to understand just from the top but it was too cute to resist. I think it’s sold out online at the moment but might be in-store - it’s H&M and called the sibling sweatshirt (they also have brother and sister options) xx

Hi all 😊 I'm tentatively saying hello here, it's so nice to see lots of familiar names from the TTC after miscarriage group and also quite a few new ones....I'm currently 9+2, had a scan at my local hospital at 8w and all was ok, but I've been here before and it still went wrong so I'm trying to make myself feel as positive as I can (not finding it very easy!) while waiting what feels like an eternity for my 12 week scan! Hope you're all doing ok! 💕💕 xx

@Pugprincess pretty much 24 hours before mine, mines on the 13th at 2pm xx

Talking of bad dreams, I had a horrible one last night, I nurseries someone and then escaped the police and I was on the run. Honestly I woke up feeling really shit and have been in such a bad mood all day. Why do these dreams have such a bad effect on us mentally?

That should definitely say murdered ffs 🤦🏼‍♀️