Thread 3 for us classed as more mature pregnant ladies

[Frazzlerock]

Morning all. Here's our fresh new thread with updated list

Hopefully all are correct, feel free to change anything that's wrong. There are lots who don't seem to post, not sure if they're still reading so will leave everyone on for now. If anyone wants in to the FB group then drop me a PM

Happy Thread No3!

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 - Baby boy born 4th June 💙
@Ethellsmum 38. 💝
@fool11 45, 💙
@PregnantPorcupine, 38, due 29/07/20 DC1
@AliasGrape 40 Due 30/07/20 DC1 (little girl)
@stairgates Age 43 💙
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3 (Little girl)
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC3 (Little boy)
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@LittleMiss7 38. Due 20/10/20 DC1&2.. TWINS!
@crispaddict99 40. Due 9/11/20 DC1
@NaomiB79. 40. Due 13/11/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzlerock age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@jalu47 38. Due 13/12/20 FTM
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 21/12/20 DC2
@LJEva 42. Due 25/12/20 DC2
@Liese27 38 Due 9/01/21 DC2
@Clarkel1 39 Due 10/01/21
@footprintsintheslow 40 Due 10/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@Viennoise 38 Due 26/01/21 DC1
@Louscarlet 39 Due 30/01/21 DC1
@MaryShelley1818 Due 09/02/2021 DC2
@gilljill1980 40. Due 16/02/21 DC2
@BuffaloMozzerella 40. Due end of 02/21 DC2
@Chickoletta Due End of March DC3?

@@onlyreadingneverposting8. I cannot believe it. I feel so unprepared. 😱. I have spent this whole time taking each day as a blessing and thankful all going well and only just realised I will have a baby in 9 weeks or before! Eeek. I cannot remember anything from DS. It is a bit scary.

Remind me what it is like at the start? Xx

I always find the start a shock - a baby who has no head control and hates being undressed! Then I always have the first night where I think "shit I haven't felt the baby move!" Only to realise the baby is in the cot next to me!!

😂😂 I remember that shock actually. Is it just total feed feed feed at the start? I think I have a romantic memory of things calling down but bet that was at about 5 months lol

@dufferedup I don't think she is on here yet. Wondering how she is the the spinal headache? I think last post she was back in hospital? Is she on the book group @Frazzlerock?

Hello to the newcomers. All very welcome here xxx

I'm here! Second blood patch worked a treat. I've got residual bum ache (literally) but it's preferable to the headache.

Hey!

Ah @Sheera1 the nursery is gorgeous! I love it 😻

I'm with you on feeling daunted about only having 9 weeks left 😳
I think it's more scary knowing exactly when I'm going to give birth, whereas with my last two I didn't know as DS1 was EMCS and DS2 section wasn't decided until about 36 weeks when we found out he was breech.
I think we have everything we need but nursery is still a dumping ground and needs a good sort out so it can be decorated. Just got to paint the walls white and put wallpaper up on one wall. Oh and clear out the bloody cupboard under the stairs. That could take several weeks on its own!

But sheeeeeeet 9 weeks to go...

@PregnantPorcupine the SNS should have thin enough tubes so that baby can stimulate the breast enough at the sane time. Not sure I I've but I'm making my own, bought some tiny feeding tubes from a vet suppliers 😁 and will put the tube into a bottle - hopefully with my own expressed milk but prob more likely to be formula given my measly 5ml attempts with my last baby 🙄

Breast feeding should be bloody easy! Pretty sure my mum just whacked them out and fed me and my sister without issues.

Hello to any newbies I've missed 👋

Great news @DufferedUp !!

Yay @DufferedUp so pleased it is better. I was a horrible horrible thing.

Yes I am definitely on a bit of a freak out! I guess we have a quarter of the way to do which seems like ages, but in terms of weeks it is soooooo not long at all.

DP did the cupboard under the stairs too to get the pram in. I feel unable to lift anything but like to direct! 😁

Hey, I know this is a while off but can anyone remember how you drop milk feeds when weaning? Trying to work out if it's worth buying a breastpump as will be back at work in April and would like to carry on breastfeeding if possible. By 7 months how many milk feeds would be happening?

@DufferedUp at 7 months we were still feeding a lot on demand but that suited us. My friend had a double breasted battery silent pump for use at work which was excellent apparently.

Hi all,
I'd love to join I'm 43 and 14+1 with twins.
I'm due 15 th March.
I have a DD who was one yesterday and 2 grown up DD 23 and 21.
Been very anxious as I had a MMC at 10 weeks in February this year but had my 12 week scan yesterday and everything looking good xx

@Dipsy77 wowsers twins is exciting! How wonderful. There's a few here with big age gaps. I'm 40 with a 21 year old and a 2 year old.

I've had a miscarriage in February at 7 weeks and a 20 week loss back in October. So you have found the right thread lots of us here have had losses, but hooray here we are keeping going towards our new babies!

Hello @Dipsy77 ooh exciting first twins. Welcome to the thread. I have a ten year gap and an MMC at 12 weeks so I totally get the worry and stress. Try to sit tight and relax as much as is possible. It is really tough. X

Sorry misread that 🙈 So pleased the scan went well. Milestone out of the way xxx

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 - Baby boy born 4th June 💙
@Ethellsmum 38. 💝
@fool11 45, 💙
@PregnantPorcupine, 38, due 29/07/20 DC1 - baby girl born 5th August
@AliasGrape 40 Due 30/07/20 DC1 (little girl)
@stairgates Age 43 💙
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3 (Little girl)
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC3 (Little boy)
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@LittleMiss7 38. Due 20/10/20 DC1&2.. TWINS!
@crispaddict99 40. Due 9/11/20 DC1
@NaomiB79. 40. Due 13/11/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzlerock age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@jalu47 38. Due 13/12/20 FTM
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 21/12/20 DC2
@LJEva 42. Due 25/12/20 DC2
@passthemustard 42 Due 27/12/20 DC5
@Liese27 38 Due 9/01/21 DC2
@Clarkel1 39 Due 10/01/21
@footprintsintheslow 40 Due 10/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@Viennoise 38 Due 26/01/21 DC1
@Louscarlet 39 Due 30/01/21 DC1
@MaryShelley1818 Due 09/02/2021 DC2
@gilljill1980 40. Due 16/02/21 DC2
@BuffaloMozzerella 40. Due end of 02/21 DC2
@Chickoletta Due End of March DC3?
@TraceyAnne21 43 and EDD is 02 Jan 21.
@TheFoz 42. Due 12/03/21. DC3
@AntiHop 42 due 6 April 21 dc2
@luckylakes 42 due May 21 DC3
@tararoo* 38 due May 21

Sp wee update on the paternity leave debacle. Turns out dp's shitty work doesn't pay out any enhanced pay anyway. So it is lower statutory rate of £151.20 each week. His work are total dicks. Been there 8 years on full time permanent contract and they give him nada on top of statutory. 😡. Auch well. At least he gets that I guess.

@Sheera1 that really crappy. How long will your husband take and does he have any annual leave he can have too?

That's harsh @Sheera1 I naively thought that all people got some enhanced if they're perm staff. My DH has been a contractor for 15 yrs and before that he had only been in roles a short period of time so he's never taken paternity. He will take a few days after this one though and he is working from home for the foreseeable due to covid so it's not too bad this time! When our 3rd was born and we had 3 under 3 he took 4 days - I was in hospital for 2 of those...I'd never let him get away with that now!! 😂

Had an 😳😖 moment with someone on Tuesday - one of the Mums at football said to me "ooo not long now!" To which I replied well " "I'm 30 weeks today - so a while yet!" And she went "oh really, that long?!" - thanks for that! Nothing like making me feel huge when I already feel a bit meh!

Oh bloody hell @Sheera1 what utter dickwads! . That is incredibly mean, no loyalty there at all is there. As @onlyreadingneverposting8 mentioned, does he have any holiday he can take? Not that he should have to, mind you.

Onlyreading, DP is also a contractor but he's managed to put money aside and has got an extension until November and then taking 3 months off. Although he's now really stressing about money and whether or not he'll get another contract after the 3 months in this current climate. Lets just say things are tense in the Frazzle household right now. He should be okay, he's had various job offers and works in the tech industry (we both do) which seems to be thriving right now so hopefully it will be okay

Funny you should say that about the 'not long now' comment. We met up with someone DP knows last night to sell him an RC car. I've never met him before but he was like "oooh you must be about to drop right? When are you due?" I said "err.... still got a couple of months to go, not due until end of Nov!" I seem to take it in my stride though, my bumps with the boys were enormous too so I just poke out a lot!

I've had a horrid week so far. Keep bursting into tears and really struggling with DP's mood. He came back from a boys camping weekend on Sunday and they were all talking about how much savings they have. They all have £30-50k in savings and we don't really have any, so he suddenly felt like the poor relation. I have told him that none of my friends have anything near that and most are stuck in debt so we're really not doing so badly But it made him plummet big time and that just sent him into a spiral of worry for our future etc. I think he's just realised the little time we have left until baby is here and he's shitting himself. Plus he's fallen out with my 11 year old so I'm stuck in the middle. Plus I've not been sleeping well at all.

I slept all the way through for the first time in about a week last night and feel much better. DP seems in better spirits too today.

Hi everyone just checking in, hard to post much at moment as DD is taking over. Also I feel like I should bow out of the thread a bit as no longer pregnant. But glad to see you’re keeping well and welcome to new joiners!

@Sheera1 that nursery is gorgeous!

@Frazzlerock sorry to hear about your rubbish week. Hope things are better today.

@DufferedUp so glad the second patch worked and you’re feeling better. I too have a very achey sore bum but guessing that was from falling down the stairs last week (or week before? Can’t remember, time is meaningless at the moment).

I gave a load of dd’s newborn stuff to a really amazing local charity that supports vulnerable mothers and babies yesterday, I’m glad it will go to good use - we had so much and much of it she never even wore it only once. But I’m also sad and thinking we should have kept some back as actually I’d like another one. (DH very much not on board with that right now!) I’m not supposed to try for another 12-18 months with having a section, so I’ll be 42 - I can squeeze another one in right? Wonder if this thread will still be going then?

@Sheera1 that is unbelievably harsh, i'm so sorry to hear that. I feel extremely lucky as my DP started a job in May, after I was pregnant, and is getting 2 weeks full pay plus 5 'bonding days' to take within 3 months which are also paid. We were prepared for them only doing statutory as it's not written into his contract but they've been super nice - I'm a contractor and me having no maternity etc means it would have been super hard if we didn't get anything!

It is crappy but also aware I get pretty great maternity benefits so can't really complain.
He will take the two weeks and use hols and we will just tighten belts to pay for it. Not like we are going to be doing much anyway! 😁

Aw @Frazzlerock that is hard if DP's mood is down and you are tired and hormonal. Oft I don't know anyone with savings like that. If I have £3k in the bank I think I am doing exceptionally well and them it gets spent on bathroom or roof or something. I don't think that is normal to have savings like that at our age or maybe I am doing things wrong! 😁. Could they be embellishing a lot and nonsense bragging guy talk and it got him down?

I get very defensive if DP says anything harsh to DS. It is a hard relationship at times. You want them to parent but also back off and do as you say. I think this child will be interesting as we have pretty different parenting styles so see some clashes ahead!

@AliasGrape please stay on if you like. Quite a few people are and there is a link to a facebook group if you haven't joined and want to. I think it will naturally become and after birth way to keep up and this friend will keep going with newly pregnant fabulous ladies?

Morning all.

How was everyone's weekends?

I've actually managed to clear out the understairs cupboard in the nursery so now it finally has some order, although its still pretty full! Mostly suitcases and bags of spare duvets and pillows which we'll probably never use. The nursery is looking a little clearer now though, just need to find somewhere for all the wedding stuff...

DP seems a bit brighter the last few days so the atmosphere is a bit lighter now thank god.
@Sheera1 its so hard having a step parent around sometimes. He's utterly amazing and gets so involved in their lives, sorting out their football etc and ferrying them around and he takes a real interest in their lives. He was even chair of the PTA for a couple of years and has been Father Xmas as school - Ex h would never have done any of that, it was always left to me to organise the DC.

He is also the main breadwinner by quite a long stretch so I feel like he puts so much in, I struggle to speak up. We both had very different upbringings, mine was very easy and I had a single mum who kind of let us do what we wanted to some degree, it wasn't strict at all. She never chased us to do homework anything really (I'm not quite as lax as this!). But DP was raised by his father who was very strict and didn't take any shit whatsoever, so we do clash with our parenting styles. Its hard because I still see the boys as my babies, even though they're 11 and 15 now - I just want to say, they're only little! But DP never knew them then. I think he sees them as older than they are and does expect quite a lot of them. It will be interesting how he parents this little one.

I feel you @Frazzlerock. It is hard with a step parent. DP is really good with him but can be quite intolerant at times and tbh I do everything for him. He is my son but he does take a huge back seat. DS was at my parents overnight with his cousins on Saturday and DP said "they are dropping him back yes?" What he was really saying was "I want to have a drink so don't expect me to pick him up" I ended up going 8 months pregnant. He is not supposed to be drinking at all after earlier fights about it, but it creeps back in. He has 4 beers on a fri and sat now which is fine, but also managed thurs and Sun this week which pissed me off. He said it was because he had tooth ache.🙄

Tbh he just really pissed me off this weekend. Made wee comments about having a last hurrah with the lads (when he has a drinking problem) and did nothing in the house all weekend. Just sort of signed off. He seems to be getting grumpy about things he will lose once the baby is here.

I feel like saying "grow the f up". He is 40! I didn't get a last hurrah! I was suddenly pregnant and have spent the last 8 months giving my body over completely for this baby and the reason we are having it is because he doesn't have any children. I am totally on board but I was happy with just DS .

I think I am just in a grumo with him at the moment over the paternity pay thing and everything he is doing is pissing me off.

He still hadn't emailed his boss saying his intentions for paternity leave, how long and when etc. I ended up writing out a sample email and he still didn't send it and then when he did after me nagging he just sent on what I wrote which was not a final version as he was to add in how many days holiday he had and didn't even bother to read it first. 😡😡 Feel like HIS mother!

Sorry for that big rant. I am def grumpy and hormonal.

I am starting to worry about my c section. Trying to stay calm but thinking about things like the fact I am on blood thinners and won't that be potentially dangerous during surgery? Have a scan and consultant meeting next week so will go armed with my comments and issues.

Am at the stage now I just want the baby here safe and me still alive! X