November 2020 babies - thread 7!

[wannabebump]

Another thread for us all x

My DH is treating me like I am 100% normal. I am having to ask him to help me up off the floor or to lift the heavy shopping. He also doesnt get that I cant teach DD in the cot anymore. He isnt treating me any different than normal 😆😆

Reach, not teach 🙄

Hi all, how are you doing? I personally have had a rough couple days, my back pain has been awful.

Mine doesn't want me to do anything! Which is lovely to be fair, but can get annoying on occasion. He won't even let me do the washing up because the bump might get squashed. The way I see it, it's better than the opposite so I'm not complaining.

I think I'm just getting agitated because I'm always the one who just gets stuff done for myself, I've always been a strong person in my own ways and to be told no you cant do that really gets my goat!
I'm not a child I know how far to push myself and when to stop.

@Pinktruffle no I'm not allowed to wash up either 🙄

I felt the first proper movement last night at 19+4. It was very exciting!

Its a fine line between wanting some extra concessions and wanting to be treated as normal, isn't it! I can do most things still but there are times where I do just say: I can't do this... please can you do it. My husband is being generally very good about it. He will step in anytime I like but isn't patronising about it.

When are we next supposed to "see" midwives? Or is it 16 weeks and you're on your own?

I'm booked in to see mine next at 25 weeks, and then 28. Not sure if that's the norm for FTM?

My partner knows I like to be independent and not fussed over but can’t help but to constantly offer to help with everything when I’m pregnant bless him. Lately I’ve even found myself excepting his help to be honest which isn’t like me at all!

I think its 25 weeks if you are on your first baby and 28 weeks if you are on your second/third etc. Honestly, there is not much to be said or done til the start of the third trimester. You just get on with growing the baby. After 30 weeks they will start talking about birth options etc but even then they arent finalised til 34 weeks or so if my memory serves me right.

It just seems like a while to just leave you, but I suppose theres not much to do apart from grow really is there lol

Of course if issues come up you can ring the midwife line and they can see you if the medical need is there. My baby went quiet a lot last time around and they would bring me in to monitor me. But normally there isnt anything else to be done once things are progressing well.

I'm not enjoying this weather. I don't like the heat at the best of times, but it's worse now!

after my 15 week mw appointment I'm booked again at 25 weeks.

My DH has been doing most things although it's mainly because I'm working and he's on furlough tbf so it's predominately out of boredom that chivalry. He did really help out when I was so ill at the start but now I'm better he leaves me to it lol.

@Whatinthename20 I never normally do but I had to change mine yesterday as well 🤣

Is there anyone on this thread with children and a full time job? If so, are you exercising and what are you doing?

I’m starting to feel slow/unfit - like out of breath going up stairs and struggling to lift my toddler (who weighs a ton!) and want to start doing some gentle exercise to deal with this, but find it really hard to fit in working full time from home and dealing with toddler too! In my first pregnancy I went swimming loads which was lovely but obviously can’t do that atm.

@harrietM87 yep! Now my hg is under control, I’ve managed a couple of runs (run -walks 😄). Either in the evening or weekend mornings (I’ve met with friends for a socially distanced run). I’m feeling less harangued as my son is back at nursery for a couple of days a week.

Oh wow well done you @Fouryearslater! Glad to hear the HG is improved too! DH and I are tag teaming looking after DS so my only time when I’m not working is when he’s asleep! I was thinking of some online workouts maybe - can anyone recommend anything good for pregnancy?

@harrietM87 I am a full-time nanny so sort of fit in that category minus the nights haha! Yes I am struggling. I also get no time to myself during my working hours so that's not helped. This heat is killing me. Find it hard to put little one in her crib without hitting my bump. Find it hard entertaining them both as they're such different ages. I am constantly exhausted and out of breath walking up stairs or picking the little one up. I'm on my feet a lot and they've started to swell recently. I get home and most days I hop in the bath, then go to bed. Because I'm so tired I find it makes eating properly quite hard. I just feel a bit of a mess and like I'm not looking after myself! I'll be finishing during week 26 and will be grateful for the rest.

This may be more of a question for second+ time mummy's, but may be useful for FTM like myself.
Baby has been moving or kicking all week and today at the usual time it starts, 2pm-ish, I have felt nothing. I'm now obviously really worried and freaking out but is this normal? Please can someone tell me I'm being irrational and that baby might just be asleep and may kick later or tomorrow? 😢

@Ourlittlepumpkin I'm a FTM so far from an expert on the subject but I know that midwives recommend drinking ice cold water to get the baby moving, especially if you are pre-26 weeks which is when a pattern is usually established, so maybe try that and see if it works.
If you are still worried, I would call your midwife, it's better safe than sorry

@OurLittlePumpkin at this stage the baby is still small so could just be kicking into your placenta or something and you can’t feel it at the moment. I think it might be a little too early for movements to fit a regular pattern - last time I was told to come in for checking after 24 weeks if I thought movement had changed, but advice may have changed.

Try drinking something cold and lying down - that usually does the trick for me. If you’re worried though then do call your midwife.

Also glad to hear someone is in the same boat as me re exercise! I find 2 year old DS exhausting enough so well done for coping with 2!

@OurLittlePumpkin babies can also have quiet days where they sleep. I used to worry if my baby didnt move for most of the day but then when I saw how much a newborn sleeps I saw why she was quiet. Baby went quiet on me 2 days ago but then was back to doing somersaults the next day. Just try to focus on feeling any sort of movement this evening. It may just be a quiet day.

Thanks both. I'm still at work so will wait till I'm home at 6 and then speak to hubby. I'm such a hot mess now as we've been out so maybe I'm just frazzled and need to cool down before I calm down! For now I'm going to pour a large glass of cold water and put peppa pig on as I am officially done for the day! 🐷🤣

Thanks @SqidgeBum
Love this group. You all make me feel so much calmer and at ease!