November 2020 Babies - Thread 6!

[BuffaloCauliflower]

New thread for the November 2020 club - looking forward to more scan pictures!

@Hancock2020 😍 Cute bump going on there! Cute dress too xx

Super congrats on great scans @FilthyforFirth and @noonaah ❤️❤️❤️

Hello! Just catching up. I’m another one not due until the end of Nov and no scan yet. I’m glad there are a few of us. Also not on FB so I’ll be sticking around here.

Lovely to see bump and scan pics. It’s all starting to feel real and exciting!

Thanks @Happymama24 xxx

Anyone else struggling to sleep at night? For the past week I've been getting 4 hours sleep at the most each night! I've been trying everything, yesterday I went on a really long walk and did over 10k steps in hope I'd get a better night sleep yet I still struggled to fall asleep, fell asleep just after 12 then was up at 2am and didn't get back to sleep until 6am, I just lay wide awake! Then I'm still up at 7.30! Getting so fed up and I'm extremely tired I'm so glad I'm not working at the moment!

@wannabebump Mine came in the post randomly. I hadn't filled in any forms and my midwife had not mentioned it so I assumed it was an automatic process. Sorry if this isn't that helpful.

The form is an FW8 and you can ask your GP for it. I got it early as I was needing prescriptions and didn’t want to wait for the midwife to do it post scan.

@EBM20 I'm also the same. Not sure if it is due to overthinking and worrying or not being comfortable enough. I have been looking to order myself a big pregnancy pillow to see if I can get myself so comfy in a little cocoon I drift off and stay sleeping!!

Lol, haven't even finished growing this baby yet and DH is wondering when we should try for the next 🤣

@Hancock2020 your DH is a brave man! My DH would have been shot down very fast for even mentioning it. The closest we have got to a discussion like that is me saying 'I dont think I can do this again', but this is our second. On DD I couldnt speak about another baby for at least 9 months after having her.

@EBM20 yes, sleep is impossible these days. I don’t feel particularly anxious about anything so I’m hoping it’s just a hormonal thing that will pass (to return in third trimester!). My DD has only just started sleeping through so I’m a tad gutted that I’m now not able to!

Great to see all the good scan news and lovely clear photos.

Absolutely no more babies here after this one! OH can endure some of the suffering ✂️

🤣

yes we are thinking about the snip too. A friend of ours had his booked before DC2 was even born haha. I always wanted 3 kids, but I suffer so much being pregnant and after. Its a full year of misery.

Plus package holidays are always 2 adults and 2 kids lol.

He was willing to get it after my horrendous labour and nightmare newborn days last time. We definitely don’t have space for more than two, and I’m absolutely not doing pregnancy again (god forbid anything happens to this one, I’m not willing to try again).

I think I’d like another but only because we have a boy and current cooking baby is also a boy so would be nice to try for a girl.

That said, I don’t think it’s realistic as I’ll be 42 by time this one born and I really struggle with pregnancy so not sure I can face going through this again. Plus DH wants to get our lives back to some degree. So I think this might be it for us

I always said if I have one I have to have another because I wouldnt leave my kid without a sibling when we are gone, but my labour was horrendous last time (52 hours) and I suffered hugely both physically and mentally after. We also have no support system, at all. Nobody. I dreaded being pregnant again. Even now, I am worried I dont really even like this baby as I know the that is suffering ahead of me.

Anyone who has had DC2, please tell me you like them as much as the first. I thought after MS eased I would grow more fond of the idea of this baby. It hasnt really happened.

@SquidgeBum I’ve also been struggling to bond with this baby - I’ve had so much anxiety in this pregnancy I think I’ve distanced myself from it as so prepared for things to go wrong. I hope those feelings will fade as things progress 🤞🏻

I always wanted 3 because I’m one of 3 and loved it, but DH has always said 2. However he has always wanted a girl so I secretly hoped this one would be a boy because I thought it would make him more likely to agree to a third (personally have no sex preferences!). But it’s a girl and he said the other day that it would def be our last baby. Tbh I think I’ll see how we cope with two before revisiting that argument!

In fairness to my DH he has left all the baby making decisions to me. He would have 1 or 5 and not particularly care I dont think. i have decided when I am ready to have them, and if I choose not to have another he will be ok with that decision. I think he sees how much I go through and knows he cant ask me to do that again if I am not prepared to, which is good.

I am also hoping I bond with this one more as the weeks go on. I was so excited to be pregnant with DD1. This one was a surprise, and I never felt excitement. More shock and panic as to how I am going to manage 2 very young kids alone (DD will be 23 months when DC2 is born). DH works 12 hour shifts. I will have to quit my job because childcare is so expensive, not to mention I have nobody to even collect or look after the kids if I have to do a PT meeting. I am a teacher with a masters that I killed myself for and a career that I love. I have to give it all up. DH doesnt have to give up anything or change anything bar maybe his sleeping habits on a bad night (I manage the nights usually as he drives for a living ..... I also manage the days ......).

I shouldnt be so negative, I know. Babies are lovely ..... well they have their moments lol. Its just a lot.

Hi All is it ok if I join? Currently expecting baby number 2 on 24th Nov. I have my 12 week scan on Monday and cannot wait!

Hope everyone is well and morning sickness has passed mostly for everyone

We’re lucky that DS will have started school as I’d be thinking of going back to work so only one lot of nursery fees to pay for (plus wrap around care!). I’d really struggle to be a permanent stay at home mum!

This is definitely my last baby. I'm asking for an elective c section and if my consultant will do it I'm going to request having my tubes tied at the same time.

How does everyone cope with going back to work and getting child care? It seems so expensive that it's almost not worth going back but then I don't think I can be a stay at home mum as much as I'd love that. I've spent ages thinking about how people manage it and I just don't understand how it's possible. I work very long hours as a support worker currently

@Amytitch it is really expensive. One thing I hear a lot though is women saying “it costs my whole salary” or something similar, but you should think of it as coming out of you & your partners’ joint salaries. Sometimes it doesn’t make financial sense for both partners to keep working, but it should automatically be assumed it has to be the mum, or that one has to quit when both could go part time for example? Also even if childcare is almost the same as what you earn, you’re still making NI and pension contributions which is an investment for later.

I’m the higher earner in our relationship so DH went part time when I went back to work after our son. We don’t have any family near which is really tough as I would have loved it if they could have looked after him (they would too!).

shouldn’t automatically be assumed