The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

I know you can have multiple shots of the steroids and you'll need 2 shots 24 hours apart for them to be as good as possible. Worth asking about it @KnitKitty as they gave me the first shot as soon as my waters broke (I know it's different circumstances for you) despite them hoping me getting to at least 34 weeks. Will it be a section for you? Apologies I cannot remember your exact situation.

I'll ask them to clarify why I've not been offered the steriods yet tomorrow for peace of mind. Thanks.
Yes, will be c-section unless she comes early, is fully engaged and we both look healthy enough, then they may let me trail labour...

Thanks ladies. I just don't know how late I can leave it to get the essential bits. However, I do have your helpful shopping list now. Interesting that some hospitals have that pack for babies born after loss, doubt my hospital will do that. The midwife at my last appointment asked me if I had bought anything yet or knew what pram I was getting and I just said no. Wonder if she was testing me now given she knows how anxious I've been because of the losses. I've got my 31 week week appointment tomorrow so let's see if I'm asked again. I still can't believe that we could actually have a baby to bring home. Whatever does happen though I am so far along now I know I need to have a hospital bag packed but I can't even bring myself to make a start on that. I'm still just taking one day at a time and hoping that approach will at least get me to a live birth. 62 days to go according to the Bounty app!

@TwittleBee glad DS is better. Fx you don't catch it.

@KnitKitty so sorry you're having this worry. It's good you're being looked after and monitored so hopefully all will be well. I know nothing I say here though is going to make the worry go away. Fingers crossed all goes well at PAU tomorrow and steroids or something else could help. As an aside, I remember about a month or so ago being worried I was leaking amniotic fluid and told unlikely and that it's probably just discharge.

@Twitwooo glad the midwife appointment went well and you got to hear the HB.

@Dimblebimble yay for kicks and movements. DH will feel them soon and may find it freaky.

@Pandora71 that sounds like a beautiful way to mark her birthday.

@InDreamland I really do recommend using www.birthbags.co.uk/shop - my mum ordered from them when my waters broke and as much as it didnt arrive in time for the actual birth, the things in there were lovely to use afterwards and the bag was decent quality too. I shall be ordering another one in the new year and then just adding a few pants, mightiest, joggers and a top.

Thanks @TwittleBee they look pretty good. I am thinking I have a few bits already (just happen to have them) they have in their bags or versions of items I would more likely use (I'm fussy with toiletries) then I can use my Boots points for other bits and planning on getting the free Bounty pack (Tesco/Asda) that have decent amount of free nappies.

@KnitKitty I'm so sorry you have this to deal with, it must be very worrying. Definitely stay away from Dr Google and trust that your hospital know what they are doing and will look after you and Baby Girl Kitty. Will be thinking of you tomorrow xxx

@InDreamland sorry that you still feel so anxious but I do understand why. It's so hard to get your head around having a baby but it's also a self preservation thing, in that we try not to get too attached. I would definitely pack the bag because you need that either way, but for other stuff there is amazon prime! I also can't believe you're 31 weeks!

@Pandora71 I'm so sorry to hear more about what you have been through. There are no words but I do think your plans for her first birthday sound lovely xxx

@Tazzle2007 I love the reason and meaning behind the name. Very beautiful.

My blood boils at the way you were spoken to over pads @Squiff70!! I am however pleased to hear you and Ava are doing well. I will be thinking of you on Monday and sending love and strength xxx

How are you @Bluebelltulip? Is the induction booked for the 26th?!

Glad your DS is ok now @Twittlebee! It never fails to amaze me how quickly they can come down with something and then bounce back! DD has one last day of nursery now and I'm hoping she doesn't catch anything to get I'll over Christmas!

@Laney79 how did your pre op today go?

Sorry to anyone I've missed! I'm being rubbish as usual!

My pre op went really well today. I was really stressed going in and mentally fired up for another round of "this c section is my choice" arguing. However, she took all bloods, swabs, weight etc and went through paperwork and procedure. She also showed me the list for the 30th and I am definitely on it!! My name was actually the first of three but I think that's alphabetical and has no bearing on who will actually be done first. I actually felt excited after leaving and like this was going ahead. I'm back to nervous now! Really hoping he stays in until then! Also been told to shave down below...Not sure whether this is hilarious or just upsetting considering I haven't been able to see down there in almost three months 😂😂😂

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue that's so good to hear you had a good pre op meeting. You're definitely sounding more upbeat in your post. You must be super excited. Thank you, you and the other ladies here are so understanding. Maybe after Christmas I will feel differently, there's just a lot going on at the moment with all the Christmas prep, work and general life.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I have myself a full Hollywood before I went in for my induction. It was very overgrown down there, I think the midwives and the consuktant who did my c section appreciated it. The midwife had to clean my vajazzle with a swab when I was hooked up to catheta and I had to be inspected several times. So at least they didn't have to part the bracken all the time. 😂

Gave. I got in the bath with one oaf those circular face mirrors that you can swizzle around for a magnified view. I did this just over 40 weeks and I was MASSIVE. I carry my babies all up front

I am all upfront too @Rubyroost - another thing we have in common! And as for parting the bracken mine is a full on forest right now! Gonna be a fun task after Christmas 😂🤦🏼‍♀️ Would ask DH to help but knowing him he'd get excited and that shop is firmly closed for business until sometime in the new year 😂😂😂

😂I had a bleed last week, crapped myself...until I realised it was from a sex injury! Wasn't doing anything unusual or strange, but guess when you're pregnant things change. Anyway was a relief that the blood was coming from a cut, rather than inside.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I guess you only have to do the top bit for c section. I was just too embarrassed to show up super hairy.

@Rubyroost I'm too embarrassed to have some lopsided half jungle 😂🤣

@KnitKitty I'm so sorry you are going through this right now and I hope that your waters stay at the current level as long as possible. Thinking of you Xxx.

@InDreamland I think your approach is the right one, I had to put away the things I bought as looking at them makes me too nervous. I wish I waited until at least 30+ weeks.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue glad your pre-op went well and so exciting how close the date is now! I'm with you and @Rubyroost on the whole "how can I trim the forest" thing, been wondering myself that lately as I really don't want it to be out of control at birth! But I already can't see it now at 28 weeks, its getting quite hard. Also thought about asking DH as the thought of going to a spa/getting a wax is super unpleasant now.

Does anyone else find themselves randomly crying in the third trimester? I don't know why, but I keep imagining all the things that can go wrong and then just start crying uncontrollably. Also feeling like there is nothing I want to do and I can't relax at all. Nothing feels remotely enjoyable. Not sure if its hormones or the anxiety. Going for a scan on Saturday, really really hoping baby boy is ok in there.

@sadtoday21 I laid down in Bath. It went surprisingly well. I've been okay apart from feeling massive tired, like I'm having 1 big permanent braxton hicks and I'm only 26 weeks! I've got my 28 week scan coming up between Christmas and New year and that's making me anxious.

Oh and acid reflux for about five hours after food.

On the forest/bracken discussion I'm keeping mine short with the trimmer on my shaver and do it by feel.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue glad your pre-op went well. The consultant asked me to chose the 26th or 27th but I don't have anything in writing, we were talking about it being beneficial for me to have an end point to focus on so I hope it's booked. It is subject to the scan on Monday being ok though as if it isn't then I could be induced then.

Popping on quickly to tell @KnitKitty that I’m thinking of you. I think I mentioned my friend who was in a similar spot and they spoke about delivering baby around your gestation- the levels did recover enough for them to deliver at full term, and he’s a big healthy toddler now! It sounds like you’re in really good hands- definitely ask all those questions and stay away from google. Hope the next appointment goes well x

Hello darling people. I apologise for being elusive especially after a scare. I think I’ve been away since the beginning of November.
Work has been mad with lots of travel including nearly being stranded of an island off Scotland! I’m so proud of you all and how you’ve coped and how far you have all come. Incredible to read through the stories of such strong women. To update I am 21+6. Having a little girl and I can feel her kick.
Me- I got a bit of a gastric cold (lost half a stone!) and pulled a muscle that I can feel basically from across the top of my bump and down the side. I’m getting better but I spent 4 days like a turtle turned over on its shell. Still very sore and tender. But hey ho.. Mustn’t complain

Catching up after another busy few days - sorry to hear you're having a stressful time of it @KnitKitty xx

@Rubyroost @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I've LOL'd reading those posts. I had a similar sitch with DS and I just didn't have the dedication with the magnifying mirror that @Rubyroost had, so I had to plead with DH and be spread eagle on the floor whilst he got to work. He's a farmer and he likened it to shearing a sheep which absolutely wasn't a compliment to my poor chuff! If you're worried you might turn your DH on @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I can confirm it had the opposite effect on mine! So glad he did it though as there was a fair bit of faffing from a fair few people and I'd just have been mortified if it had been a full on hairy growler!

I'm packing my hospital bag, 30 weeks on Friday and I've just decided in and amongst the Christmas chaos I'm going to pack a bag. Nothing to report here, little lady still wriggling about, belly button has popped this week, already getting the "you'll never last til your due date" comments which is annoying. I've taken so much more pleasure in these last few weeks of pregnancy - I think with DS I took everything for granted and relished I'm complaining about everything. This pregnancy is likely to be my last all being well, and so I'm just really enjoying my bump this time round (I'm sure I won't be saying that when the PE swelling kicks in!)

@Flyfisherlady sorry to hear that you have been ill but great that the pregnancy is going well.

@Frillyfarmer nice to hear that you are doing well.

Woken up with period pain again but my hopes aren't high. 37 weeks today, can't believe I'm this far already.

Pahahahaha @frillyfarmer that is hilarious! Glad little lady is doing well and that you've reached 30 weeks - excellent milestone! I've had comments on my bump size the whole way through, super annoying!

Glad to hear you're doing well @Flyfisherlady.

I am super emotional @sadtoday21 and have been for a while! I just cried reading a thread about that Sunscreen song and regularly find myself randomly blubbing! Hope your next scan goes well.

Hope you are ok today @KnitKitty xxx

I have decided I am having a glass of wine tomorrow night. It's DH's last day at work and tradition for us to watch naff Christmas films and have party food in the evening. So I'm going to have a small glass of red. Most anxious about it triggering an early arrival now! Im seriously MASSIVE, tired, out of breath and still having Braxton hicks. Think I deserve a small glass of vino!

Ps @Bluebelltulip I really hope you get news on Monday. It's not long now but I imagine your anxiety levels must be pretty high. I hope you are managing to get some rest time in xxx

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue pre op went well ta. I was super anxious but the midwife and doc were very understanding. Got my antacids to take and all the instructions...although I've been told Not to shave the area as any nicks can cause an infection risk so interested you've been told to do the opposite!

Sorry-only popping on briefly as I'm knackered and nodding off-again! This maternity leave hasn't hit the rest and feet up stage yet! Too much to do. Hugs to all xxx

Thanks for that @Laney79. I've just googled and it does seem consensus is NOT to shave! I remember shaving last time but then I didn't know I was going to have a section. I might just have a trim and tidy! They will operate in my previous scar which is actually quite far from my bikini line. Anyway, I'm going to ask my midwife today as have an appointment. I really don't need anything else to worry about!