The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

[coconutlatte44]

Great news @Bluebelltulip, not long to wait then!!

I know @InDreamland time really is moving faster than it did early on isn’t it? I feel like the last few weeks might drag a bit but it’s insane that I’m down to the last month.

@sadtoday21 I just had mine on Friday at 35+2. To be honest mine wasn’t terribly useful, it was two health visitors talking mostly about the scheduling of visits after birth and what support is available to us if we’re struggling, etc. I wouldn’t stress too much about it unless you are feeling really unprepared in which case you could try calling and seeing if they have anything earlier. The booking people have been fairly flexible with my requests for different dates although I have mostly been asking for things to be pushed back rather than forward.

@Squiff70 Sorry for this added stress, hopefully it means she will get the best care possible.

[InDreamland]

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue have a lovely Christmas! Echoing what you said, the support on this thread and our original TTC thread has been amazing and much appreciated, so thank you too and also to all the ladies here! I could not have survived this year without you all!

@Bluebelltulip so pleased the scan went well. So exciting that you'll be having baby boxing day!

@sadtoday21 glad the scan went well. The movements scares are horrible, I do find I'd I'm busy and moving around more myself that Bubsy is lulled to sleep so I feel less movements and it's very worrying. Thankfully the 2 times I've been in baby had been fine. I went to the NHS antenatal class last weekend, ours was a full day and we found it very useful and informative. Covered everything from the start of labour signs, pain relief, birthing options at our local hospital/ Trust, tours of birth, how partners can help and look after us before, during and after labour and birth, skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, vitamin k, breastfeeding, baby sleeping arrangements, bathing baby, nappies .......... it was a packed day of info. Basically all the info for birth plans and after baby comes. Glad it's all in the booklet they gave us. There was so much more that I didn't list. All the women in the course were first along than me. I was 30 weeks, the rest were 32-36 weeks. So I don't think it's too late. The hiccups don't seem to be daily but I do occasionally feel baby hiccupping, it's like a strange rhythmic feeling. I do feel more prepared/ knowledgable even if I haven't bought anything yet. I will start though after Christmas. I am still scared of jinxing things.

@coconutlatte44 yep I definitely feel since entering the 3rd trimester that it's gone a little faster but agree that it'll start to drag again closer to the due date. Crazy how suddenly we're getting more babies on this thread now.

[sadtoday21]

Thanks @coconutlatte44 and @Indreamland! I guess it's not too late then. I have an irrational fear of going to the hospital in mid-February, its full of bad memories for me from last year and the year before. But it seems it will be unavoidable as both my growth scan and antenatal class are scheduled for then. I doubt the NHS will change it to late January just for my mental health!

I really understand what you mean about jinxing things @Indreamland, I still feel reluctant to buy clothes or any other items. But at least you are prepared now and know what you want to get! I am also just making lists of things and will hold off buying until a bit later on.

Not long now @coconutlatte44! I think the third trimester goes by both very slowly and quickly, just hoping to the holidays will speed it up and then I will at least be at 30 weeks. Do you find you are slowing down a lot towards the end? Are you reading anything to prepare for the birth/what happens after?

[Beaglemum93]

@Squiff70 sorry Ava has had to be transferred so far away and has had to have surgery. I really hope she pulls through. You are both in my thoughts.

@Bluebelltulip glad your scan went well and so exciting that you'll have your baby so soon!

My DS is now 16 days old which is so hard to believe! He was only due yesterday! He still won't sleep in the crib, only when being held - admittedly I've not tried that hard because I sleep better knowing someone is watching him and making sure he's still breathing, I guess the anxiety following two miscarriages will never really go away. He's breastfeeding every 1-3 hours but it seems to be paying off as he now weighs 7lbs 8oz (he was 6lbs 13oz when he was born).

Hope you're all doing well, not long now til we'll have lots of babies on this thread!

[coconutlatte44]

Wow @InDreamland mine was really different - to be honest I was expecting a class more like yours and was a bit surprised it was so brief. Luckily I’ve done NCT which covered the majority of those topics and I did the other NHS classes I was offered so I guess it just just be different in different places.

@sadtoday21 Yes, I have definitely slowed down this last couple of weeks. I was doing parkrun up to 33 weeks and genuinely felt pretty good during/after but then started to get very sore afterwards so I cut back to a jog/walk and still struggled so this past weekend I just walked and even that has been tricky for me to recover from - spent a couple of days hobbling around afterwards and am just now starting to feel back to normal. So that’s obviously my body telling me it’s time to take it easy. I need to keep slowing my husband down when he’s walking as I’m normally a fast walker and he forgets how slowly I need to walk at the moment.

Also struggling with insomnia, usually some time between 3 and 5 or 6 for a couple of hours. But as am finished with work for a few weeks I’m just getting up and going back to bed after the sun comes up 😅

@Beaglemum93 How are you finding things overall? We have so many friends around who have recently had babies and everyone says those first couple of weeks can be brutal so hopefully it only gets easier for you from now on!

[SunshineCrocodile]

Hello ladies - just popping back in from the TTC thread to see how everyone's doing.

@Squiff70 I was so sorry to hear about Elliott and hope Ava continues to grow stronger. You truly do them both proud. You'll all be in my thoughts xx

[RedRobin7]

Hi ladies! Sorry I haven't posted much - I've been really suffering with my migraines and I've been so bloody anxious! Just had my 12 week scan and I had prepared myself for a MMC again but I didn't need to worry, baby is doing well! We've jumped ahead 6 days and now due 2nd July.

Wishing you all a lovely Christmas! Good luck to those of you due to have your babies in the coming week or two.

@Squiff70 You've been in my thoughts a lot. Sending you love xx

[InDreamland]

@sadtoday21 it's very normal and natural to feel that way about going back there. I walked passed the EPU on way to my 12 week scan and have to say it was horrible! Also, to get to the maternity unit you have to go passed EPU so it's a difficult walk with the constant reminder. You're doing so well though so stay strong, you can do it! What do you have to lose by asking to move it to January? It is a nice feeling knowing that I'm better informed about what to get. Take your time, there's no rush to buy anything. I do think as I'm getting closer to the due date I'm starting to think more seriously about needing to know what I should be seriously considering buying or choosing. At least if Bubsy arrives early I won't worry as DH will know what to rush out to buy and order online.

@Beaglemum93 awww he's already a mummy's boy! Sorry you're still anxious, guess like you say miscarriage can really raise those anxiety levels. Well done on the breastfeeding, I hope I'm as successful! His first Christmas is going to be so special!

@coconutlatte44 it certainly sounds very different, good job you did NCT! Enjoy your time off! I'm still impressed with your parkrun! I'm still going to gym classes but really taking it more easy now. Talk to me about the insomnia! Well actually it's more that Bubsy wakes me up with kicking and I'm so exhausted because of it.

@SunshineCrocodile how are you? Lovely to see you pop in!

@RedRobin7 YES YES YES! I'm so thrilled for you! Amazing that baby is doing well and you have gained 6 days and due date has been brought forward! What a relief for you. I love your picture! Makes me wish I'd gone for a pre-Christmas scan!

So I'm 32 weeks today. I have 4 weeks left of work and working from home now until the new year! Cannot believe Bubsy is due 8 weeks today. I'm so emotional, had a cry this morning and I don't even know why. Think I'm sad that the two I lost last year who were due this year should have had their first Christmas tomorrow. I'm also worried about losing Bubsy still. Won't be happy until I have Bubsy in my arms at home ......then starts a lifetime of worrying about other things. I've also started questioning myself and worried I'll be a rubbish mummy.

[KnitKitty]

Hello. Really sorry I haven't caught up with the thread at all but just wanted to update you on the safe arrival of Baby Girl (keeping name private).

She arrived on 20th December at 34+1 by emergancy c-section as I'd developed preeclampsia.
She was born weighing 1960g (4lbs5) and was able to stay with me as she could breathe on her own.
She was on a heated cot until last night but seems to have learnt to control her body temperature now which is fab.
Still in hospital and probably will be until after Christmas but all going well.
I'm doing okay... Tired, obviously and still a bit shell-shocked!

Hope you're all doing well. X

[VenusStarr]

Congratulations @KnitKitty on the safe arrival of your beautiful baby girl ❤️ xxx

[Rubyroost]

Awwww so cute, and so much hair already! Glad she's doing well. X

[InDreamland]

Awwwww CONGRATULATIONS @KnitKitty and welcome to the world baby KnitKitty! She's gorgeous! Hope you can both go home soon but glad all seems well. Eeeaaaakkkk! So happy for you x

[frillyfarmer]

Huge congratulations @KnitKitty - a beautiful little Christmas present for you.

I'm so sorry to hear that Ava has been unwell @Squiff70 - sending you both strength and love.

I've got a manic Christmas ahead of me so wishing you all well before I vanish for a few days. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me through the worst year of my life. 2019 has been such a stinker and I just hope and pray our dreams all come true in 2020 - finding you ladies really has been my solstice this year. Xx

[Bluebelltulip]

@Knitkitty wow congratulations, glad you are both doing well.

[JuniperAndRose]

@Squiff70
I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved Elliott and am sending all my good wishes to Ava. I am wondering if you have support in your new location? It sounds like you are all far from home. Of course I understand if you would prefer not to share your location, but if there are things that we can provide which will make the practicalities of being away from home easier and let you focus all your energy on Ava then I am sure that there are people who are willing to help. If it’s at all useful for practicalities, I am normally based in London, but currently in Lancashire for Christmas.

(Sorry if this post is intrusive. I don’t normally post on here- I was on the TTC after loss thread after the loss of my beautiful DD1 in January. I read along with this thread as I got my BFP in September and I was waiting for the 12 week scan before posting on the graduates thread. Sadly at the 12 week scan we got very bad news and we had to make the heartbreaking decision to have a TFMR in early December. So I never did post on this thread, but still read along with both threads as I would like to hope that I will be here at some point).

[MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue]

@KnitKitty - CONGRATULATIONS!!!! She is a beaut! Merry Christmas to you! XxxX

[ReeRi]

Oh huge congratulations @KnitKitty!!

[InDreamland]

@Twittlebee how are you doing? Hope you and baby are okay.

@frillyfarmer have a fantastic Christmas too. Don't overdo it!

@JuniperAndRose sorry to hear about your TFMR and your loss in January too. Hope to see you here very soon with a BFP!

[TinyPaws]

@KnitKitty Congratulations of the safe arrival of your baby girl (BabyKnit?)

@JuniperAndRose Sorry to hear your sad news.

[Melpops36]

@KnitKitty congratulations!!! Gorgeous xxxx

[Squiff70]

Massive congratulations @KnitKitty on the safe arrival of your gorgeous little girl!

@JuniperAndRose I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Nothing I can say will make this easier for you but please rest in the knowledge that we understand your pain and you are not alone. It's so sweet of you to reach out to me when you're struggling. Thank you for your kind words.

[Squiff70]

PS. We're at Liverpool Women's Hospital but we're moved here from Alder Hey today. Still a long way from home

[UnicornsandRainbows1]

@KnitKitty Only just seen this. Congratulations! She's gorgeous and so glad she's doing well. I hope you're doing well too!

[strawberrye]

@Squiff70 so sorry to hear you have been moved so far away from home. I hope Christmas brings little Ava a swift and uncomplicated recovery from her operation and steady progress from there.

@JuniperAndRose so sorry to hear about your loss, what a heartbreaking situation and what a fantastic idea to ask squiff where she is to see if anyone can help out. What a wonderful person you are to be so thoughtful when you are struggling. Hope you are back on here soon with your rainbow BFP

[strawberrye]

@RedRobin7 wonderful news! Really pleased your dating scan went so well, what a wonderful Christmas present.

@KnitKitty CONGRATULATIONS! How beautiful is Baby KnitKitty?!? Hope you are recovering well and have a wonderful Christmas even if you are both still in hospital. What a gorgeous Christmas present

Merry Christmas ladies, it is so lovely to see the rainbow babies arriving and there will hopefully be many more in the coming weeks and months! Hope you all have a peaceful and joyful day. Also wishing ladies who are being induced/having their sections in the next couple of weeks the best of luck!