October 2019 thread 2

[Secretlifeofme]

Hi @CowBrow and everyone, thought I would start a new thread since the old one has filled up and I can't find another! If there is one and I've missed it, let me know how's everyone doing?

I’m hoping not to put on too much weight. When I fell pregnant with my daughter I was pretty slim, for me. I’d just lost a load of weight as we’d not long got married. I was pretty fit as I’d been running and doing a boot camp thing. Now I’m the heaviest I’ve been in a very long time, and very unfit!
I’m planning on getting out walking every day once the baby’s here and I’m recovered, but I’m annoyed with myself for being so overweight in the first place.

Ive put on around 5/6 pounds and am 6 +4 . Usually pretty slim, I think each boob has added 2 pounds at the moment! Just eating healthily and thinking its bloat!!!! My work dresses are becoming tighter around my chest so am paranoid about that as I have small boobs so they feel huge to me!!!!! Could literally hang coats off my nipples. Also feeling worse as day goes on. Cold, tired and irritable. I found today hard.

Has anyone taken any time off work yet with morning sickness? I haven’t yet but if feel awful I will later in the term if needs be.

I haven’t taken any tests since my originals! I just am assuming all is okay but we shall see on the early scan this weekend.

As a first time mum to be I feel so clueless. I was thinking the other day oh my god I dont know how to do anything with a baby but suppose you learn on the job!!!!!

@Topsy15 yes!!! I really don't know what to do about early scan actually, looking for some advice. Told myself I wasn't going for one until 8-9 weeks as last time with my MMC I had a heart beat at 7+1 weeks anyway so before that won't offer much reassurance. But the other night I have vomiting and diarrhoea which is what I had around the time I think I miscarried last time and today I've woken up not busting for a wee which I have been for the last few weeks and I'm convincing myself my boobs aren't as sore. I am on holiday on Saturday with friends that I am going to have to tell about the pregnancy as it will be too obvious I'm not drinking (think boozy trip with your friends) so now wondering whether to go for an early scan on Friday (I'll be 6+2). In my heart I know it probably won't offer much reassurance either way but if it's ectopic or molar or I keep loosing symptoms and there's no heart beat would it save having to go through heartbreak of telling everyone on holiday if it was a doomed pregnancy anyway. Help!

Whitevixen I understand. I tend to put on ridiculous amounts of weight when pregnant (talking 5 stone) but after my last daughter (almost 8 years old now), I lost shed loads, got really fit and was the slimmest I'd been in forever.

Maintained it for years but over the last 3 started to steadily gain and gain. Partly due to stress in my private life/ medication/ steroids/ mirena coil and partly due to being really greedy and lazy. I'm the biggest I've been in years with a couple of stone gain and I'm so annoyed with myself that I've started a pregnancy at this weight when I know I'm going to gain even more...

Like you, I'm just going to try and keep and eye on it the best I can over the next 8 months or so (not always as easy as it sounds depending on need for carbs if/ when sick or cravings later) and will then try get my bum into gear at some stage during maternity leave..

Random I don't know what to advise. I can't help but worry and I'd love a peek inside my stomach (why cant we have a little curtain that we can open, have a look and close again?) but, like you, I'm not sure how much reassurance a scan at 6 weeks would give me personally. So I don't know what to say. Would these friends be close friends?

@Random2468 Go for an early scan if it will help put your mind at ease. Mine is this Sunday at 7+4.

Im so ill today did a 50 minute commute, stayed in work for ten minutes, drove 50 minutes home after vomiting. Now lay on sofa feeling shocking x

@HarryPottersSecretSister a few of them are close but most aren't close friends and ones that I wouldn't choose to tell early to be honest, as these wouldn't be the people I would rely on for support if things went wrong. They're more "fun" friends if you know what I mean and they're not at the stage of babies yet! Ahh I'm so torn. My boobs definitely do still hurt tbh and I am now starting to feel sick today again but now I've got the scan idea in my head before holiday I'm so torn! Ahhh!

@Random2468 If I was in your circs I'd have an early scan - it's horrible having pressure to tell friends isn't it mine are the same when I wasn't drinking a few weeks ago I had to come up with a really ridiculous elaborate story why and still all they did was nag! I was just terrified someone would guess and don't want anyone to know we were TTC in case it goes wrong (already had a mc).
Like you said though at least you will know if it's not viable before telling anyone although it sound like everything is fine! I had an early scan this time at 6+4 and could see the sac, baby and heartbeat even abdominally 😊

Yes I've already had one scan and it made me feel better for a couple of days and then I wanted another one 🙈. Agree @HarryPottersSecretSister Would constantly be nosing if I could the babe would get no peace!!! Haha. Looks like I am going to be one super overprotective muma

To those going on holiday why not just say to your friends you're ttc and to give it the best chance of succeeding you're not drinking just to be on safe side

Im 7+5 today and have only just started to get some sickness now. Typically seems to hit in the evenings around 7pm, so most the time im sat in bed and facetiming DH downstairs with my dinner requests

Still feeling very detached from the pregnancy, even with the early scan we had last week (Saw the heartbeat, but not developed enough to be audible at that stage). I've never been a baby/children person, so I guess that makes it difficult to get excited because they don't hold any interest to me?? I semi joked to my husband that if I were pregnant with a cat, id be beside myself with excitement, but human babies don't hold any appeal.

Perhaps I just need more time. I am horribly adverse to change also, so the concept of adapting a whole other person into our life dynamic is the scariest unknown to me!

@Random2468 if it was me I probably wouldn't tell reassurance scan or not because I would feel like the odds of things going well not being high enough and if those arent specially people you would rely on then it just wouldnt want them to know anything. But everyone feels differently I think! I would prob lie through my teeth 😂 Dry March maybe for charity? Medication which means you cant mix it with Alcohol? Xx

@random2468 I'd probably hold off saying as well if they aren't people you'd normally share with. I've only told people who I'd want support from should things go wrong and that's after a heartbeat at 7+5.
Ive thankfully not had a MC before, but have a few friends who have been through hell with them so that's making me really worried.
I think I'll be freaked out when the placenta takes over and my symptoms start to go. Still preparing myself for bad news at 12 weeks even though so far there's no reason to be overly concerned.
Boobs still sore but vary every day, massive nipples coming and going which look crazy, on and off sickness. No bleeding or strong cramps.
Think it's just because you're already growing this thing inside and are already in protective mode.

CZFR the old 'I'm on antibiotics and cant drink' routine. It's a sure fire way to announce a pregnancy here (Ireland) as no one believes it. Still though - surely no one would be rude enough to actually query this excuse so I reckon I would go with this too Random. If they aren't very close friends I'd be reluctant to tell them. Not even for negative reasons or in case something goes wrong but because (and admittedly I might be a bit strange with this one) I have a 'hierarchy' of the people I want to know first/ tell first.

My children are the number one priority to let in on the secret. I want them to be the first to know. Then my mum (I'm an only child and my dads dead) and DH's parents/ siblings obviously. I'll then leave it for the news to spread around. I'm not too pushed who hears and when once the above important people know first.
I'd also be very upset if any of them accidentally heard 2nd hand from someone I'm not even close to.
(Work does fall in there somewhere too - purely out of obligation/ obvious practical reasons)
So I wouldnt like to tell acquaintances before I tell my most important people.
Not sure that even makes much sense..

Frizzy I'm sorry to hear you're so worried. I absolutely get it. It's very very hard. I'm trying not to drive myself insane with anxiety.

Bingbang I'm not going to pretend that I fully understand how you feel. And I'm not sure I'm the best person to offer any advice; I'm a ridiculous children person. In fact, I often think there's something wrong with me because given the choice, I'd spend all my time with kids and dogs and never interact with adults. I'm horrendous socially.
That said, I remember my cousin was very concerned when pregnant with her first DS - she confided that she wouldn't have gotten pregnant had her DH not been desperate for children. She wasn't a children person and she worried she wouldn't be particularly maternal.
This all completely changed when her son was born (and she went on to have another boy 3 years later). It's different when its your baby. But that's very hard to explain at this point.

It'll be fine. There's no set rule on how you should and shouldn't feel right now. There's no handbook and there's no 'normal'.
I think I started to feel more attached when the kicking and moving about started.

Anyone's nipples killing them? not boobs - specifically nipples?
Mine feel like I've taken a cheese grater to them. So painful. I'm trying to get the most out of sleeping on my stomach while I can (will miss this so much later) but my nipples are too painful. Even clothes/ my bra rubbing against them is awful.
Told DH that if he even brushed against them, I'd chop off his willy.
Anyone else?

(Was going to add a 'TMI' disclaimer on this but seeing as most of the talk on our threads have referred to gas/ discharge/ constipation etc I decided we're past the point of formal pleasantries..)

Hi all, thanks for your replies. I probably didn't explain properly - these are good friends (I've chosen to go on holiday with) they are just not my best friends. My best friends already know because going through 1 MC already I know that even though I didn't tell anyone last time before it happened I certainly told them after as I needed their support. Re friends on holiday I don't want to lie to them, they will 100% know if I say I'm not drinking and it will only lead to speculation behind my back which to me is worse than them knowing and finding out I had another MC. So that part I've decided. Just undecided re scan or not before I go!

@Random2468 ahhh fair enough! Well I am getting an early scan before telling my parents in a couple of weeks, just in case 😊 I will be 7w5d but it is really up to you at the end of the day! Xx

@HarryPottersSecretSister mine were like that a couple of weeks back but it's stopped now. Tbh I don't have any pregnancy symptoms, apart from food cravings and the fact I can't do my button up on my jeans because I'm so bloated 🙈 j just feel normal really.

I'm feeling nauseous and tired but my boobs seem ok which is slightly stressing me out. Although I only really gave up breastfeeding in early Jan, so I am not totally sure what 'normal' is these days. I just feel that the timing for this pregnancy is so perfect that I'm worried it will all go wrong.

@Random2468 similarly, I'm away for a child free weekend with friends in 10 days. I'll tell them, because it's not really possible to avoid, but I'd rather not. I've been debating getting my early scan just before I go, so approx 7+3, or the following week. I know that stats are much better after 8 weeks. So tricky though. Oh - also worried that I'm going to feel terrible, hate the travel and not want to do anything!

@random2468 I'd do whatever makes you feel better. Have 2 scans if you want, one before you go and another at say 10 weeks. Take a look on Groupon. There are 2 places near me in Lancashire that do reassurance scans for good value. One is £19 and one £29. It's why I'm so tempted to get another in a week or so. Maybe once I get my proper scan date I'll make a decision as I have my booking on Friday and I'm 9 weeks on Saturday. Last time I could call up for my scan after the booking appointment. Not sure I can wait another 4-5 weeks if there's a long wait. Dh will probably say no though.
I think it's all because I'm really excited to tell dd and want time to speed up so I can. She's 5 so will tell everyone therefore although I'd love her to have known first, I genuinely needed some support before it's suitable to tell her.

I'm due 24th October which makes me 5+6 today.... this is my first. I went to my GP a week ago and they referred me to the early pregnancy unit at my local hospital and said I would get an appointment through the post. I still haven't heard anything, how long does it take to come through normally?
I'm slightly anxious to get there as I'm probably going to be high risk due to high BP and an under active thyroid which obviously the doc is aware of. I expected to be seen quite soon because of this? What are your experiences? I just want to make sure everything is ok! Thank you

Hi @Emjm9, we are due date buddies I'm afraid I can't answer your questions as I don't live in the UK but I thought I'd say hello anyway!

How is everyone doing? I am struggling a bit, had to leave a meeting at work today due to feeling sick and dizzy. To be honest I am feeling more dizzy and lightheaded than sick at the moment - is this normal? I'm 5 + 6 today.

@Secretlifeofme I'm 6 weeks today so a day ahead of you. My main symptom is I'm hungry.......all the time!! I can eat then half an hour be hungry again. The only problem is then I feel sick when I'm hungry. I can't just eat when I need as I'm teaching all day and my TA's don't know yet. Just trying to eat enough during playtime's to get me to the next break. Then I'm absolutely exhausted at the end of the day, it's a long 50 mins journey home!!

@Secretlifeofme Hey! To be honest I'm quite similar to you, I've not really had any nausea but just the odd dizzy spell and feeling tired a lot... I think my main thing is being SO bloated, my clothes have suddenly got very tight
It's all very exciting though, just can't wait for a scan to see if everything is going as it should - I've booked one for next week at a private clinic so hopefully that will put my overactive mind at ease!