Convince my mate - there's no greater act of fiction than a birth plan - how'd u stray from yours?

[jaynehater]

My first birth plan called for whale noises and lavender and soothing massages, while real life coughed up four hours of induction, ventouse, epidural and gas-and-air.

Second birth plan, newly realistic me said 'drug me' - and I gave birth on the dining room floor leaning against the hoover playing jigsaws with dd1.

How badly did you all stray from your birthplans,(or am I alone here?!?) so I can convince my first-time pregnant list making deluded mate not to put so much store by hers (it's not how organised you are, Penny, it just happens!!!)

Ok, had to be induced which I didn't put! which meant I had to lie on a bed which I didn't want either. Put gas&air as had this when i was 15 and it was great, but made me sick when in labour, but didn't want pethidine as did nothing when had it before but was persuaded by midwife to have it and it was great so had 2 doses (by the way wasn't pregnant at 15, had gas & air and pethidine for dislocated elbow). Then had an epidural and episiotomy which also weren't in birthplan but were very helpful at the time. so birth plan was completely wrong.

I didn't have birth plans but I soooo wish that with all 3 dcs I had asked to be left to discover the gender myself.
Each time it wasn't even announced, I just sort of overheard someone saying he/she.
I forgot until it was too late, 3 times.

My notes didn't even make it out of my bag

Strangely enough, cadelaide, that's the one thing I didn't have in my birth plan as I didn't think I'd mind. But when it came to it, the midwife just said "look what you've got" and we saw he was a little boy. It was so lovely. Sorry it didn't work out that way for you.

I would love to have looked into their faces a bit first....maybe I'm being unrealistic, I'm sure someone would have blabbed.