Due January 2019 (2nd thread)

[InDreamland]

Hello
Last thread was closed............?

Sorry for typos. Predictive text. Not "halt surgical", supposed to be " happy special".

Not "sunbathing" but "something"

@InDreamland you sound really overwhelmed, understandably. I wonder if the tiredness is making you more anxious than you might feel otherwise? If so, it might be worth considering calling in sick to work for an extended weekend - you might not be physically sick, but mental well-being is just as important as physical health, and you might benefit from a few extra days to catch up on sleep and relax. I don’t have any advice for your family situation, but it’s great your DP is being so supportive.

Thanks @Buttercup53. I wish I could but there is so much going on at work that I'll jusy get stressed about stuff not getting done. It's not a job that's easy to take time off. I'll see how I go. DH is being great......... probably helps that he's got similar feelings with the family issue.

@InDreamland your fil's girlfriend sounds pretty awful. Would it be possible for your sil to also be available when you have to see the gf, so you have two people to support you? Also when people behave like that, it's them that have the problem..so try not to let her words affect you (easier said than done! I tend to just roll my eyes I can't hide my feelings well! You could always think back to what kinds of annoying things she said/did with your sil, and think of how you may respond assertively so you feel a bit more prepared.. Often when people say something hurtful and the recipient stands up for themselves e.g. I do not appreciate you talking to me like that (whatever works for you), they are shocked and back down- bullies are often not used to being stood up to!

Thanks @Miffy. She can be quite passive aggressive. Comes across as all prim and proper but really there is an air about her I really don't trust (like she's fake) and when she makes certain comments or asks particular questions (plus doesn't even call me hy my name, calls me my sister's name!!!!! She's only met her few times) she just has me annoyed but now I'm pg I just don't need it. Unfortunately I'm less tactful/diplomatic and so if i say something I know it will come out harsh. I think DH may help put her in her place if she upsets me now as I got upset lastnight when I got all worked up and he promised he'd tell her to just go away.

That sounds incredibly difficult. To be honest I wouldn’t tell either of them anything. You don’t need someone like that in your life or your baby’s life.

@InDreamland at this stage hun its important to only have those around you that you trust and that are supportive.

Just been for our third scan at the EPU and we now have a bean with a heartbeat. It was so amazing to see that flickering. Date wise they keep slightly changing so I wont know until 12 week scan but I am roughly 7 weeks. Im still being really cautious given our previous MC however it has been good to see some positive progress. Ive been discharged from EPU now so I will be getting my booking in appointment arranged.

@Changedmaname We figured we'll find out at the scan - neither of us had a strong desire to wait and see so figured it would simplify name choices if we only have to chose for a boy or a girl!

@InDreamland Just a thought, but if you feel like you need to tell him but don't want the rest, especially if your DH isn't close, is a phone conversation an option? I guess it depends on where they live compared to you but if it's a complicated journey etc then it might be a solution, using the reason that you wanted FILto hear from you rather than a different source? It looks likely that we'll be telling MIL by phone because we're unlikely to be able to see her before the Autumn and would like her to hear from us rather than by someone else. Ditto one of DH's siblings who lives so far away that we won't be seeing them until after the birth.

@Jebbs I told my dad and step mum over Skype as they live in southern Spain. We'll see them during the school summer holiday but didn't want to wait until the end of July before telling them. They were so happy and want to be as involved as they can despite the distance. Also, they had a lot of trouble conceiving my half-sisters so I know that they'll be great support if anything happens.

@InDreamland I haven't told my mum, or my grandma or brother because they'll tell my mum, because that's a complicated relationship for a lot of reasons and I'm not ready for her to know yet. As @purplesmiler said, at this stage it's important to only have those who you trust and are supportive around.

Thanks @sexnotgender @purplesmiler @Jebbs and @cryptonaut. That's the reason so far we've only told my parents and my sister. Think what we'll do after the 12 week scan in 4 weeks tomorrow we'll let it all sink in (praying everything is ok) then DH will call his dad who only lives a 15 mins drive away and ask him to pop over but sans the girlfriend and tell him he wants to have a father son chat without her around (ever since we got married she is always there but hardly ever was before). We'll then give him the news.

@purplesmiler that's so exciting about your scan and the heartbeat. I'm really wishing mine would come sooner.

How's everyone feeling today?

I'm feeling very sorry for myself! Left home at 6:15am to get to a 10am meeting in the Midlands. Do not feel good at all amd these trains tilt. Plus why do people have to eat smelly food in an enclosed space. Given I've not yet been sick once during this pregnancy I hope it doesn't start today! I'm so tired too.

Sorry you’re struggling indreamland I’m feeling surprisingly chipper this morning!

Glad you've perked up @sexnotgender. I have started to feel a little better as the day went on but now on a train back into London and then have another 1 hour tube journey home after that so getting anxious already about that last hour pf the journey. Would be nice to feel well enough to have a nice evening with DH. Feel bad if I deny him our usual Friday night out.

Hope everyone else is feeling good today x

Hi can I join please. As the name suggests I'm pregnant with no.4. Lots of sickness and nausea isn't making this enjoyable but I'm counting down the weeks till the scan.

Due 21st Jan unless dates get changed at the 12 week scan.

Agree with the bloating, it's awful this time.

Hey!

Feeling super nervous this morning as we are off for an early scan at what should be 8+1. Had a dream last night that they couldn't find anything so not feeling so great 😢

@Wowthisisreal - good luck at the scan. Dream will be your anxieties about it manifesting themselves while you sleep, but you will be fine. Let us know how it goes.

@Soontobemumof4 welcome to the thread. Can't imagine having four (or three for that matter!) you are amazing. I am freaking out about having two to look after!!
Sorry you aren't feeling great, I'm in a similar boat and it sucks, especially with a toddler in tow. How old are your three?

Oops - having username issues. Changedmamame = WhirlingTurkey!

@Wowthisisreal hope your scan went well.

Had a full on migraine and felt really sick yesterday, had to have a nap and go to bed early. We are away for the weekend and I'm trying really hard to just relax.

@Wowthisisreal hope everything went well with scan. The dream was your anxiety playing out. I've had a nightmare where lost baby and it's just horrible.

@soontobemumof4 welcome to the crazy gang! Nice that there's so many experienced mums on here. Hope you feel better soon. Bloating is hideous. I'm only 8 weeks and my stomach can really stick out and my goodness the gas is just extreme.

I'm not feeling too awful today thankfully but hope tiredness etc doesn't hit me later as we're going to a BBQ party later.

@Changedmaname @InDreamland @purplesmiler thanks! All was good. Baby was measuring well for age (only 2 days out which they said was neither here nor there) and heartbeat was clear as anything. They had a good look around and in good position and everything looking as it should so yay! Very relieved 😊

I seem to have hit a point that I’ve really had enough of being pregnant, which is ridiculous given I’m 8 1/2 weeks. This baby was all we wanted for about a year prior to conceiving and I thought I’d be elated when it finally happened. I feel like absolute dog shit.

I’m miserable. I’m ill all day, every day. Last night I shocked myself with the projectile vomit that came after trying to have a bit of Chinese. This morning I’m just constantly wretching with nothing coming up, because there’s nothing in there.

I cannot stand the smell of my house. I can’t pinpoint what it is. There’s something that just hits me on every floor that makes me sick. I spent £20 on air fresheners yesterday and now having had the worst day so far, those smells are making me sick.

I’m shouting at the dog for giving me cuddles because I can’t stand the smell of him. I’m spending most of my time in bed by myself so I feel so lonely.

I’m probably not getting enough fluids because I can’t stomach water. The things that do work for me last a couple of days before knocking me sick. I’ve got to the point where I don’t know what I can eat because there is absolutely nothing that I fancy.

I’m sick of people talking to me about the baby, I seem to be getting found out by every little thing which is making me so paranoid that I’m being watched but I can’t be normal because I feel like Ive been hit by a bus.

We’re telling my dad today (mum knows after she tried everything to have a boozy bank holiday with me) but it’s killing me because I know they’ll be made up and want to talk about everything baby related but the thought of it all makes me so irritated.

I wanted to do something nice for hubby today, and I think he half expected it too because I’m the sort of person who’d get him a Father’s Day card from the dog but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

I don’t know how I can get through another couple of months feeling like this. I’m hoping it will hit me when we have a scan and it all becomes real and maybe it’s just a bit of me feeling sorry for myself because I’m hardly ever poorly, so It’s taking its toll.

I used to resent people who complained about being pregnant, how could they when they’re so lucky? I am literally the person that I hate right now.

I also hate anything yellow. The warm coloured lights in our bathrooms make me feel sick, the yellow curtains in our bedroom make me feel sick, the yellow towels in our ensuite make me feel sick. The cream hallways in my house make me feel sick. We only bought this house in February and I’m already wanting to pack my bags and get out or spend a lot of money on the house that needed no work.

Sorry, I just think I needed a rant. Bloody hormones!!!

wowthisisreal That's great news about the scan! It must be such a relief especially after your dream. I had an early scan and remember being convinced they'd find nothing too as my hcg was low, but thankfully all was well. I had multiple dreams yesterday that I was bleeding, the first trimester is filled with anxiety.

Hotdamndiggitydam it sounds like you are going through a really tough time at the moment. I also have an issue with the smell of my house, and gagged really badly when I went into the bathroom where my DH had put bleach down the toilet. Maybe windows open may help if it's not too cold? I had a bad all day nausea day yesterday..today is not as bad. I think my nausea is tied to how much sleep I have, and I had a lovely night sleep last night. I read somewhere that smelling a lemon can help with nausea but as you don't like yellow, maybe another citrus fruit may help? I found sweets help short term.. And fresh air/walks. Perhaps you could ask people not to talk about it for a while? E.g. you feel sick and would like to focus on other things until the nausea passes. Hopefully the nausea will pass soon! 🤞