Bleeding, waiting for repeat scans, worried about viability etc – let’s unite in limbo!

[MrsMcJnr]

Ladies, I know there are quite a few of us in this category and I am conscious that although the lovely ladies on here are supporting us on every thread we post on, I am worried that we are spoiling their own pregnancy experience by worrying so I thought I?d set this up for those who really don?t know if things are going one way or the other. Thought it might help us to get through the days/weeks until we do know what?s going on.

For those who don?t know me (though I?m a prolific poster ) here?s me in a nutshell: Based on LMP I?m 9+4 weeks (9+1 based on suspected OV). First pregnancy (though had early termination 10 years ago). TTC for 8 cycles to get here. Got BFP 26/1. Some spotting that week so sent to EPU on 23/1 for early scan. Gestational sac seen by external scan and yolk also seen by internal scan. Measured only 11.4mm though so only 5+5/6 weeks. Was rescheduled for scan 7/3 to see if things had changed. Given 50/50 chance. Started heavy bleeding 1/3. Had emergency scan 2/3. Told sac still there and has grown. Repeat scan scheduled for 9/3. In the meantime, more heavy bleeding, clots, cramps and much anguish.

I just wish I knew what was going on! Please join me.

Thanks Mum03

Jules ? are you sure we are not the same person?! When I was reading your post, I got goose bumps because we do so many similar things! I?d love to share notes with you as we read. I?ve going to also read all the miscarriage sections of the TTC and Pregnancy books that I already have (quite a few ) so if I find anything interesting I?ll post it. So far, all I?ve noted is to buy and use iodized salt! (to do with thyroid function).

So sorry to hear about your friend . I am going to church tomorrow to light a candle for our baby too. I always light one for my Grandma on her birthday (16/3) so I?ll take comfort that she?ll have a Great Grandbaby in heaven .

In my little box along with the diary is the baby grow that I told you all I?d bought. I?ve also packed away our name for a little girl, I?m so sure our beanie was a little girl and in my head she?ll always be Ava.

What you said about me was really nice, I can?t say that I feel strong, but coming on here and talking to you and the others has really helped me too. x

I know what you mean. I also invisioned a little girl and her name is Benja. MY DP and I wrote down all our hopes for her life and buried it next to big oak tree in the forest.
I sometime go there and leave some leaves, pine cones etc.

Whoops.
So sorry to hear your news. I'll be thinking of you on Thursday.
You may want to have a look at the m/c / bereavement threads. I found them a huge help last year. It was good to chat to others in the same boat.
Eaglebird x

Good morning. How is everybody doing today?
I guess for now I am the only one left in limbo...?! Am counting days. 7 more to go.
No bleeding (I guess that's good), no pregnancy symptoms either (I guess that's bad). Many good thoughts to everybody.

Glimmer ? what an unusual name I love what you did, that is so lovely but so sad too I hope we are all in a much happier place soon. Sorry you are still in limbo but you are not alone, we?ll help you through

Whoops ? how are you feeling today hon?

Jules ? it is comforting to know that I am not going through this alone though I really do wish you were not going through this too I?m sleeping a lot and badly, I keep having horrible nightmares, not about the baby just about lots of things. Sleeping was such a lovely escape when I was waiting for news and now I dread it. I am back at work today but concentrating is a struggle. Hence popping in here for a bit of indulgence. Annabelle is a very pretty name too.

Glimmer -don't worry too much about the no pregnancy symptoms I had bleeding with both my dc's and no symptoms

MrsMcJnr - I'm ok thanks we were expecting to hear what we did yesterday and I think we had mourned when I had the first scan.I know it probably sounds a bit harsh but I just want to get through tomorrow and look to the future.

I can understand how you feel Whoops be strong x

Woops, thanks for the reassurance. I know it's a bit ridiculuous: I am just waiting for the 6 week scan, when so much can go wrong afterwards. It's just that I started being concerend as soon as I found out that I was pg, especially with the bleeding...

Woops, if I were to have another ERPC I would check my hormone levels in the weeks following the surgery (I know it's really hard to buy pg-test when you know you are not..). This way you know when you test negative and should expect AF. I didn't know that and GPs kept congratulating me to my new pregnancy, when in fact I had active tissue left. Just something I learned....

Glimmer - hon, it's not ridiculous, you have to take each day as it comes and treat each event as a hurdle as that scan is for you. Good point re the pg tests. I might get some so that I make sure I see a -ive.

Whoops so sorry for your loss babe i'm think of you today and sending you all my love and (((((hugs))))))

Mrs thank you for your poem i though it was beautiful ! xxx

Glimmer thinking of you hun and keeping my fingers crossed for you xx

Jules im glad that the scan showed everything was ok with your cysts and that they have gone downxx

Sorry i havn't been hear for a few days xxx

Sorry for the short post it looks really uncaring and quick.

I am thinking of you all,all the time and sending you all my love,sorry if that last post seemed a bit abrupt !! xx

Hi all. I have not read all of this thread but skimmed it to try and catch up with you all. Some of you I know already from other threads and hello to those I don't.

Mrs M suggested I follow her over here from the pg after mc thread. I am not in pg limbo anymore but have just had a 2nd missed mc and ERPC on Tues. This pg I had a scan at 7 weeks and all was well with a heartbeat and so on. Then started bleeding on Sat at 10 weeks after sex and thinking it was nothing, had a scan on Monday. However the baby had died at about 7 1/2 weeks just after the scan. I had an ERPC as I had a horrendous mc the first time and had to have emergency ERPC. I wanted to avoid that again.
I hope the ERPC has gone well and I am a bit concerned.While I don't seem to be bleeding at all really I have bad backache.The surgeon did not come to see me after and I was too drugged on the general anasthetic to look at my discharge note. I have since read it and it says 'Vicryl Rapide 3/0 placed on Cx, due to small tear caused by Vaticulum.' I have no idea what this means but I am guessing it means they caused a tear doing the ERPC. I wish they had explained this to me. I am going to see my GP on Monday to get some answers but I hope there is no damage caused. Anyone have any idea what it means? Glimmer maybe?
I did try to ask questions before hand as Glimmer suggested but there was noone really to ask. The doctor I saw was not the gyny surgeon and she did not know much about the risks, just read them off the sheet they had given me. Her answer was 'I have been working here since December and we do these every day and I do not know of any going wrong'. Hardly a scientific or objective answer.
When the surgeon did show up he was four hours late and I was desperate to get out of there so my reasoning had gone. His jokey answer was ' as you have already had one you probably know more about it than I do' He seemed really nice and experienced and was joking around to put me at ease but looking back this was not really the answer I was looking for.
Sorry to go on ladies. Whoops I hope your ERPC went well today.
MRS M it was a great idea to start this thread as you don't want to go on about these difficult and sad topics on the pg and antenatal threads. Look like you guys have really been supporting each other through these difficult weeks. Mrs your poem was wonderful. You have a beautiful soul.
Jules and Whoops I am sorry that it has not been good news for you. Thinking of you.
Glimmer wishing you all the best for your scan.

i dont know many of you on here, but i am truly sorry for all of you that have had bad news.
mrs - your poem was lovely, you are a very clever lady. i am sorry my post was so lame, but i dont seem to have your way with words, and its so hard to know what to say.

glimmer - from what i can gather, you seem to be experiencing similar to what i did. i was spotting from about 10 dpo and then 2 days after i got my bfp i had quite a lot of fresh red blood and clots, so i thought it was all over. then i had blood tests done at the EPU and my hcg levels were increasing as they should be, so i got hopeful again. i had a scan at 5 1/2 weeks and they saw exactly what they should and the dates they gave me tied in exactly with what i thought they were. had another scan at 7 +4 wks and saw a hb. i have been spotting pretty constantly since before my bfp (except for a few days here and there) and i have a few more occasions of bright red bleeding and some cramps. i didnt get any sickness until past 6 weeks so i wouldn't worry about your lack of symptoms at the moment. i dont think i will relax until my next scan (next wed) but i am still feeling sick, so i am still hopeful at the moment. i really hope your scan goes well, this thread needs some positive news. good luck

Good morning. Greedy thank you so much for sharing your story. It really gives me hope. It seems that everything did go wrong with this one: Right after conception I did get very sick so sick (had to take meds) that I hoped it wouldn't work this round. Then BFP at 10dpo followed by two days of red bleed. I was so sure this would just lead into my AF and this time was just not the time around.
The bleeding continued for 10 days but has stopped now for 4 days in a row, but this doesn't mean anything. With my missed mc I had on incident of light bleeding which stopped, too, and it had been the sign that something went wrong. My DP jokingly sais I suffer from stubborn uterus and cervix but I think he has a point: I want a little one so much that I am sure it has an influence on the physical side.

I found the following on www.ob-ultrasound.net/
"
-Heartbeat at < 6 week., With bleeding 33% are lost, 16% are lost if no bleeding present

-Heartbeat at 7-9 week., With bleeding 10% are lost, 5 % are lost without bleeding present

-Heartbeat at 9-11 week., With bleeding 4 % are lost, 1-2% are lost without bleeding present.
"

Greey how far are you now? It seems to me that your chances are better than 90%, maybe even 95%!!! I wish you the very, very best for your next scan. I will definitely check on Wed.

i am 11 weeks now glimmer. the annoying thing is that i missed my scan yesterday cos i was on the aeroplane, so now i have to wait till next wed. when is your scan then?

Taichi - I am so sorry you are worrying, hon. I honestly believe that everything will be fine. I do not know exactly what that sentence means, but I will take a guess (guess!!). The difference between an D&C and ERPC is that the latter is a vacuum procedure, i.e., there is a tube that 'sucks' the material out. This is more gentle than scraping it. I assume the 'Vaticulum' is the tube and agree that they probably teared the cervix a little.
I did't know what Vicryl Rapide is but a quick internet search describes it as "A synthetic absorbable suture (10 days wound support)." It seems to be a little "bandade" (do you say "bandage" here in GB?) that falls off by itself after 10d. They probably put that on so that it would not bleed and get infected. But they should have told you, because you might find it (IYKWIM) sometime next week.
When I had my time of worrying, a doctor said to me: just imagine the stretching/tearing etc when you give birth. The fact is: the uterus and cervix have an amazing capability of healing -- because they have to do so after birth and this is what was needed for the survical of our species. So, a tear in the cervix is most likely not a problem at all. Just make sure it doesn't get infected: no baths or sex for one week (I assume you were briefed about that). And if you have an unusual discharge, go to the GP who will put you on antibiotics. I am sure you probably know all these things, sorry for being repetitive.

Be strong and try not to worry too much. I am sure you will get your period withing 6 weeks, unless you go for it right away ....

Hi Greedy. Sorry you missed your scan. You were in St Lucia, weren't you? I hope you a had a relaxing holiday...I will have a first scan next Tuesday at 6 weeks. Counting the hours until then.

Glimmer thank you so much for your post. I don't know why I did not think to google it myself. I guess I am not thinking straight. The infor is really helpful and your comments about healing cervix reassuring. . are you not in UK but US? I forget we are international sometimes!
Greedy shame you missed your scan. I bet St Lucia was worth it though. I'd love a holiday right now. Dream dream dream. Under the circumstances I thought I might bundle DS off to grandma next month for a weekend so Dh and I can try and enjoy ourselves adult styly with a city hop on the Eurostar. If we are not making babies we may as well be making whoopy

Taichi -- I love the weekend trip plan. I am German, lived many years in the US, recently moved to GB. I guess my American dominates over my Bristish (in addition to the Gewrman accent

Hi everyone, Thanks for your messages. I had the D & C today it wasn't as bad as I thought have had more pain in my had and faw than everywhere else!
I'm just glad all the waiting is over now and that I can look forward to the future and hope this is something I never have to go through again. I hope none of you have to go through it either.

Whoops ? so glad the physical bit is over for you now and that you are out of the limbo. We are here for you anytime. Be strong hon

Sweetbean nice to see you and a little love goes a long way, even in a short post!

Taichimum ? sorry that this is the first chance that I have had today to come and see you on here poor you seeing that on the notes, I cannot help but feel for you. The whole experience sounded awful. It can never be nice I guess but surely they can do more to make patients feel better at such an awful time. I have to say the EPU midwives and sonographers were lovely to us. Shame about the community midwife though, I called and left her a message on Monday to say that I had lost my baby and could she call me, she still hasn?t I think that?s disgusting! I hope your GP is more helpful and is able to explain and put your mind at rest. If it helps at all, I developed back ache last Wednesday and it lasted for about 4 days, I now know that the MC started the Thursday before so maybe it?s a result of it?!

Hello Greedy how I have missed you! and how I will miss you now that we are no longer on the lovely journey together . I?ll be seeing you in all the old familiar places though (cue for a song!) Hope the holiday was fabulous, I am very of the brown bump and the virgin coladas don?t worry about the words; it?s the fact that you are here to see me that counts. I have to say, many of my RL friends are avoiding me I suppose I can understand, they don?t want to upset me by flaunting their bumps but nor do they want to think about what?s happened to me, I do get it, I just feel lonely . Really hope next Weds goes well, will b thinking about you.

Glimmer ? hang in there Honey Greedy will keep you sane too never knew that you were German why would I, I know, just think its interesting

I?ve had a crappy day, just feel like everything is getting on top of me and I can?t handle it .

MrsMcJnr - I know what you mean about friends talking to you, I have friends that have a) not really said much to me or b) just want to talk about what has happened but one fab friend tonight talked about loads of other things before talking about it! I don't mind talking about what has happened but there are other things in life too.

Glimmer - Hope things are ok with you and that your scan comes round quickly

Jules - hope you're ok too

Thanks Jules I?m ok really. You know how it is.

Hello Whoops, hope you are feeling stronger today. You are right, there are so many other things in life but they just feel a bit pale at the moment, I suppose it will take time and makes me realise how much energy I have focused on starting a family.