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Staying posifrickentive- Thread 13 for ladies pg after mc

999 replies

LynseyH · 26/11/2016 17:50

And here we are at thread 13... we can do this Smile

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jbee664 · 05/12/2016 13:59

Hey All,
Just catching up!
Emily - hope everything went well today.
Bec - all looks lovely, too early for me though!
Ants - how's the situation with your DSIS? I was going to wait until after my scan to tell mine - she's 22 weeks but she's had some scares recently so I wanted to tell her now as I'd hate for somethng to go wrong for her and then have to tell her.
New Shoes - I had the same with my heartbeat the other day, I almost thought I could hear it!!
Jpeg Hope the leg pains have eased.
Mojitos How very annoying re your night out. I know a friend who will delight in telling me all the bad things about babies and kids when I tell her!
Lynsey glad all went well
whatser not long re work now!!

I'm now 11+2 and have my scan a week today, just want it to go quickly now, getting nervous!!

Also, I'm going to name change after this - a guy from my work saw me on mumsnet last week and asked my colleague if i was pregnant - she didn't know I am (although had guessed from my tiredness!) and was put on the spot so am going to go for an unidentifiable name! :)

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emily86 · 05/12/2016 15:52

Well I'm afraid I'm going to be bowing out ladies. No heartbeat on the scan today. Absolutely gutted. I'm going in for medical management tomorrow so it can be sent off for genetics testing. Will then be seen in recurrent miscarriage clinic in 6-8 weeks once the results are back. I'll be asking for surgery to remove my uterine septum then with the hope that it helps.

Thank you all for your support these past few weeks. I really hope everything goes smoothly for you all from now on. I might do some lurking just to see how you're all getting on if that's ok.

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knorrig · 05/12/2016 16:05

Name change from jbee

Oh Emily, I am so so sorry to hear that, have been thinking of you today and hoped all okay. Sending you a big hug and hope you're back on here very soon. Glad you will be getting the follow up care as that was something I felt I was missing from my mc's.

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jpeg28 · 05/12/2016 16:47

Ha ha Ants that made me laugh!

Wow Becs 4lb!!!! I reckon I've put on about 12lb so far!!! I think I may need to eat less bread!!

Whatser it's so close for you now! It's great you have the xmas hols coming up and hope you get some rest, you must be exhausted.

Amazing news Lynsey! Bet you feel relieved.

Welcome Effy... really hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months. This is an amazing thread to share all your anxieties etc.

Emily I'm so so sorry for your loss. I hope you can rest and recover and be looked after. And I hope they get some answers for you. Flowers

I'm suffering with a horrendous headache today and sore throat. I've come home from work early and I've set up camp on the sofa where I'll stay! Hope everyone else is ok.

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Whatsername17 · 05/12/2016 17:35

I'm so sorry for your loss Emily. I hope you get the answers you need. Flowers
I had a lousy midwife appointment today. My bp has shot up. Not overly high yet, but high for me. I was steady at 112/66 for ages and now it's 138/88. Threshold is 140/90. I normally have low bp so it's high for me and probably explains why I feel so crap.

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LynseyH · 05/12/2016 18:52

Oh emily I'm so sorry to hear your news. I really can't find any words to help as I know nothing helped me when I was in the same position. Just please take good care of yourself, take some time to heal and of course you can still be around here too.

xxbec I'll have a nosey on the listing!
Welcome effy.
Aw jpeg yet again the colds, bugs and viruses are doing there thing. Keep warm and plenty of fluids!
Yikes whatser what happened there? Get your feet up and rest!!
Sorry if I've missed anyone!

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LynseyH · 05/12/2016 18:52

Their* not there. Hate getting that wrong lol.

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Effy1990 · 05/12/2016 19:13

What is likely to be seen on my scan thursday, I think I'm about 8 weeks but as I have a really long cycle I could only be 7.5?

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fuzzywuzzy · 05/12/2016 19:17

Emily I'm so very sorry for your loss, I hope you get answers from the tests. Much love.

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NetflixandBill · 05/12/2016 19:24

Hi everyone,

I've been on here before under a different name but felt it was time for a change. I'm pregnant again after two mcs this year. One at 5weeks (discovered at 9weeks) and the second at 7wks (discovered at 8w).

I'm now coming up to 7w (again) with a 'reassurance' scan booked on the 14th. Not sure how to feel and to be honest i am not really acknowledging it. I told a few close colleagues who i knew would support me, and they are! But i find it tough when they talk about me being on maternity next year or how i've 'got all this to come' etc. I guess i wish i had their confidence!

For the third time running i have had a few mild symptoms but nothing more. I guess i have been a little more crampy this time but not too bad. Had some slight nausea last week but none now. Boobs feel swollen and tender but they have every time. I've been praying for morning sickness.

I just hope that if it's dead/going to die then we can have it out by christmas. We'll then be able to pursue some treatment.

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XxBecxX · 05/12/2016 19:29

Oh Emily I'm so sorry for you, my thoughts are with you xx

Effy from my healthy scan experience at 8 weeks you should hopefully see a little kidney bean with a heart beating away xx

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XxBecxX · 05/12/2016 19:33

Welcome Netflix and I'm sorry for your bad experiences.
I think you are in self preservation mode and I understand it so will the other girls, you will struggle to have faith in your body and your baby until you at least get past the 12 week mark, x

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fuzzywuzzy · 05/12/2016 19:36

Netflix good luck with your pregnancy. Can you get monitoring scans at your EPAU? I got them every fortnight from six weeks, they were probably as traumatic as they were a relief. At each scan I was convinced of the worst. I've had mild nausea and nothing this pregnancy as well, but this time as I've progressed there's hope.

Try not to think too much about it, take one day at a time.

Fingers and toes crossed for your scan.

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knorrig · 05/12/2016 19:58

Effy...I had a reassurance scan at 7+4 - it was hard for me to see anything other than the sack but she showed me what was the baby and we listened to the heartbeat. For me there were 2 sacks but baby 2 was smaller and heart beat slower so they said it might not survive. They might say an internal scan is better to get a better picture. Good luck

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NetflixandBill · 05/12/2016 20:07

Hi fuzzy, the EPAU told me last time to ring them directly next time i got pregnant rather than asking to be referred from the GP so that's what i've done. They recommended 8wks which i don't mind too much, as i saw a heartbeat last time at 6 which had then gone by 8, and in some ways that made it a little harder. I expect that if it goes well, theyll see me again at 10 and 12.

I think self preservation mode is accurate! With no1, i was so positive. I did not even entertain the idea of miscarriage and couldnt understand people who did. Why would you waste a day of this wonderful experience worrying?! I knew the pram i was going to have, and had planned all my maternity dates. I see now that it was the mourning of those plans which was harder than for an embryo we never knew, and so subsequently I just try and stay neutral.

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XxBecxX · 06/12/2016 05:23

Yeah people who have never experienced an mc are blissfully ignorant, it's not just the loss of the pregnancy itself it's the loss of the slice of future thats disappeared, your hopes and dreams are gone too, it's a pretty devastating thing to go through.
There's good stats for seeing a heartbeat at 8 weeks and then the pregnancy progressing to full term 98% I believe.
Obviously as the thread suggests we've all had similar experiences, I've had so far 5 healthy children and this pregnancy I'm 20+1 weeks along.

Your in the right place here to air your feelings and anxietys at least xxx

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INeedNewShoes · 06/12/2016 08:10

Hello Netflix - On my previous pregnancy I went through a scan at 6 weeks where all that could be seen was the yolk sac then seeing a heartbeat at another scan a week later only to lose it days after that. This time around I actually refused to have any scans until after 8 weeks. I didn't see the point of having a scan any earlier as they can be inconclusive whereas at 8 weeks you will see a heartbeat if there's ever going to be one. It's worth waiting for a clearer picture of the situation.

I felt exactly as you did re mourning plans.

Fingers crossed that all will be well for you and you will find that with every week that passes you will be able to feel a little more positive.

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jpeg28 · 06/12/2016 11:05

Hi Netflix. I had a scan in my last pregnancy at 7 weeks and they didn't see anything other than a sac, no heartbeat. I went on to miscarry. This time I had a scan at 5, 6 and 7 weeks. At 5 weeks they saw a sac in the right place, 6 weeks a teeny bean and at 7 weeks a heartbeat. bec is right, seeing a heartbeat at 8 weeks plus is a great sign and my MW gave me the same stats, 98% of pregnancies who have seen a HB at 8 weeks are successful.
I agree with you bec it was the loss of the future that hit me hard. Obviously losing the pregnancy was awful but all of the future of that child was gone, I found that really heard to deal with.
I really do envy people who can enjoy their pregnancy without any real anxiety, especially at the beginning, but I guess it makes us all even more grateful when we get pregnant again.
Everything crossed for you netflix

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fuzzywuzzy · 07/12/2016 18:07

Hello everyone, hope you're all doing well.

Had my 16 week check today, I'm 15 weeks 5 days today tho.

Midwife checked baby's heartbeat and couldn't find it immediately. The longest seconds of my life I started praying and was utterly terrified. She found it eventually apparently baby was moving a lot as we'd catch heartbeat and then baby would disappear off again!

Thankful we heard the heartbeat as I was gearing up to rush off to hospital. Seriously traumatised.

Also I told her I was getting a lot of pelvic pain and she causally told me I'd prolly develope SPD & I should take pain killers till it became unbearable then they'd refer me to a physiotherapist. I was too shocked to say anything, but afterwards it's occurred to me why am I meant to wait till I'm in unbearable pain till I get physiotherapy, surely earlier the better?

So anyway this pregnancy looksset to be eventful.

But baby has a heartbeat and I'm so so so relieved.

May book to see my GP and ask for a physio referral I'm already walking like a little old lady as it hurts so much, I don't want to take painkillers.

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Catlady100 · 07/12/2016 18:41

Hi all, I hope you don't mind if I join you and I'm so sorry to read about those who have recently had a loss.

I had a MMC at 10 weeks in July. I'm now pregnant again and am 11 weeks today. I've had three scans so far which have been fine (due to early bleeding) and I have another scan and my harmony test this Saturday. Even though I've had scans they've provided no reassurance and I'm very anxious. I've planned for bad news on Saturday.

For those of you further along- does it get any better? This is really hard.

Cat xx

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Catlady100 · 07/12/2016 18:42

*when I say provided no reassurance by that I mean they've been fine but right after I'm back to worrying 😞x

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fuzzywuzzy · 07/12/2016 18:48

Hi catlady, congratulations on your pregnancy.

For me personally I'm constantly on edge unless I'm actively not thinking about my pregnancy, it's so hard isn't it being relaxed and happy about it.

I hope your tests and scan go well. Smile

I think we'all all be on pins to some extent till we are holding our babies in our arms.

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MoonlightMojitos · 07/12/2016 18:59

To those of you who've had your 16 week appointment, do they always try and listen to the heartbeat? Or does it depends on the midwife? I'm still feeling very anxious although I know I'm out the first trimester now and it's less than 2 weeks since my last scan. Considering booking another reassurance one or a home doppler although it's generally advised not to isn't it incase you don't hear anything and panic? bec did you say before you have a doppler and have you had luck with it through your placenta?

Welcome effy and like others have said by 7 1/2-8 weeks you'll hopefully see baby and heartbeat by then and get some reassurance. fx for you tomorrow

emily I am so sorry for your loss, really hope you're OK and you recovery quickly. Take some time to yourself and hope you have good support x

Welcome netflix it's so difficult after going through mc isn't it. All my colleagues know now and they're all so excited and asking questions etc and I still really don't feel excited or comfortable talking about it most the time in that 'just in case' frame of mind. Oh to be ignorant to it would be lovely and just enjoy it.

Congrats on the heartbeat fizzy but that's a shame about the spd. I don't have experience of it but I'd definately push for a referral if you can as like you say surely it's better to tackle sooner rather than when it gets that bad? Seems like bad advice.

Hope everyone else is good, haven't had a chance to check back through everyone's posts.

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MoonlightMojitos · 07/12/2016 19:02

catlady Welcome and I'm the same. I'm 15 weeks today and unfortunately still so anxious :(. I've had 4 scans already but they only reassure me for a few days before I'm back to worrying. I'd have one a week if I could! Another 5 weeks and 2 days til the next one feels like forever. Congrats on the scans so far though and the stats are definately in your favour now!

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Catlady100 · 07/12/2016 19:06

Thanks Fuzzy and Moonlight, glad it's not just me (while not being glad it's you if you know what I mean!). Feel like I'm slowly going mad. I'd love one every week but my OH won't hear of it. He's an optimist and always looks on the bright side - I don't seem able to do that at the moment. Thanks again for the kind words x

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