Pregnancy after infertility II

[stealthbanana]

We've got through a whole thread! Hope it's ok that I took the liberty of starting a new one.

Newbies, if you've had fertility treatment and found that it actually worked, this is the thread for you! We're a supportive group of women battling everything from scanxiety to unexplained bleeding, and we generally can't believe this is really happening for us!

First thread is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2584015-Pregnancy-after-infertility

Oh gosh Mrs that is such a hard decision. My hunch is to use your doctors excuse for a week and then see how things look in a week. You may decide you want to be honest further down the line but maybe be cautious for now?

How are you feeling? How many weeks are you again? When will you be back on your feet do you think? Xx

mrschris I'm afraid I wouldn't hesitate in adopting the "gynae procedure" excuse. You are still so early and (I'm really sorry to have to raise this) you don't know if it will be successful yet. I'm cynical enough to know that if, God forbid, something does happen to this pregnancy, confessing to IVF will very likely mean you mysteriously don't pass your probation....

Sorry to be such a downer but I really don't think you have anything to gain by being truthful at this point. Just say you are unwell (WHICH YOU ARE), take the non specific doctor's note and focus on getting better xx

smurfy I was waking up at stupid o clock for weeks, sometimes starving, sometimes sick. It seems to have eased now think the cumulative exhaustion has finally done me in

Hi mrschris, re clothes I started showing much earlier than I was prepared to announce my pregnancy but I gave up on trousers/skirts and switched to floaty or flared dresses that I already had. Pregnancy leggings/tights (over the bump) are useful and cheaper than a full maternity wardrobe. I've never tried a bump band but I would have thought undone trousers would be a bit of a giveaway?

With work I would probably use the gynae explanation for a bit longer, maybe another week or two until you've had some more scans. But as its unlawful for employers to discriminate on the grounds of pregnancy, if you tell them that you are pregnant, it will offer some protection against potential disciplinary or dismissal actions, they would have to tread very carefully to avoid being sued. I told my manager when I was 8wks to be able to get time off for all the early scans and appointments. We don't get on so it would've been stressful trying to arrange all the time off otherwise.

I stopped waking early a few weeks ago! Now I'm a serial snoozer again.

I'm only 4w3d I think so, soooooooo early! My gut is to use the generic gynae excuse too, for the reasons stated, so that's reassuring!

I think the risk is that if you don't carry on with the pregnancy you are very vulnerable. If it sticks then as blueroses says you have protection. I'd just hate for you to be dealing with a miscarriage and a job loss at the same time - as i say, I'm really sorry to be so negative but just looking at the worst case situation.

Presumably with clothes as the ohss resolves itself you will deflate too.

I think in your situation I would not mention the pregnancy yet. If you weren't in a probation period it would be very different. I had to announce mine quite early due to the risky nature of my job but I was already well settled within my role. It's a very difficult one but I agree with Stealth and second what she has said.

Sleeping is becoming so difficult for me. Im waking at all hours to go to the toilet, sometimes struggling to get back to sleep and having the most crazy vivid dreams. They seem so real and are often very distressing. Its horrible, but I'm not sure there is much I can do about that.

After relatively stress-free few weeks, I am bleeding and cramping, and the midwife has asked me to go in. Work ordered me a taxi home but it's taking ages (London traffic). DH will meet me at the hospital with my notes as chances as he'll have time to go home first as he's getting the train. Very stressed. I was bloated and constipated yesterday, thought the pain was from that. Please pray that the baby is ok.

Oh blueroses. Hopefully it is something minor. Glad you are getting checked out. Everything crossed for you that baby is a-ok xx

Hi all just found you and caught up!
Blue roses saying a little prayer for you and bub. It could be a multitude of things, so hopefully something minor.

Mrs Chris - I recognise your name from a previous thread I think.. welcome to the board nd congratulations. I concur with the others and would go with GP note for now. Hopefully it settles down for you quickly

I have my 20 week scan tomorrow and I'm beginning to freak out. My bump is tiny so am now worrying that baby hasn't grown in addition to not having put on any weight yet. Think I have felt weird movements but am not sure - could be wind aghhh - wish it was over with

Good luck blueroses I've for everything crossed for you

I will go with the consensus and use the generic note I think, now just need to find a way to disguise the fluid 'bump'!

Good luck for tomorrow birchy and thanks for the welcome

Thinking of you blueroses. Will have everything crossed for you xxx

May I join? Recognise some of you superstars from barren and bored thread.

blueroses praying everything will be ok

Zenzie and Stealth good to hear all going to plan - must have been amazing to see bubs on the scan stealth!

MrsChris I'm also suffering with late onset OHSS and ended up being hospitalised - it is a self-limiting condition so you def need time and rest and lots of fluid to help it improve. Do daily checks on your weight and waist size - I've now lost 5 kilos of fluid and down 10cm on the waist. Refusing to wear mat clothes yet and just gone for bigger sized clothes which I can just about get away with if I wear big colourful scarves!! Hope it all works out work wise, I've also used the gynae excuse and no questions asked.

birchy good luck with the scan - everyone is different bump size wise, don't worry and fingers crossed

Hi to everyone else.
Currently 6 weeks pregnant after first IVF - being scanned weekly due to OHSS (worrying now about over scanning and effects on baby!!) got scanned today but Dr couldn't make out much, just the gestational scan which of course sent me into a mild panic. My HCG levels are doubling as they should and Doc wasn't concerned, he said should have a better idea next week. Oh another week of worrying whether poor little bean is surviving this OHSS..help!!!

Bluerose- thinking of u hun and keeping everything crossed xxx 😘

My waters had broken and I was in premature labour. I have delivered a beautiful baby boy. At 21wks 3 days, there was no hope of survival. I am numb. This has happened so suddenly and unexpectedly. He's absolutely perfect and I can't stop cuddling him. I just want him to wake up.

blueroses I am so, so sorry. There are no words. I hope you can have some peaceful time with your beautiful boy. Saying a prayer for you all and wishing you strength and peace.

Blueroses, I'm so sorry sweetheart. I don't have any words that will make this better but please know you, DH and your beautiful son are in my prayers. I'm so sorry.

Blue roses I am so so sorry. There are no words but I am thinking of you

I'm so so sorry to hear this new Blueroses. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. I am thinking of you and sending love. Give him a kiss from us all. Xx

Oh blue roses I am so very very sorry. there are no words adequate for you. Glad you get to cuddle your beautuful boy. Much love. X

Oh Blueroses. I'm so incredibly sorry and heartbroken for you. There are no words. You have my deepest deepest sympathy. Xxxx

Blueroses im soo sorry to hear this x i am sending you and ur partner lots of love and strength at this really difficult time xx

Oh my dear god blueroses. I just can't believe it. Am so so so sorry to hear this. Your poor little perfect son. All my love & thoughts xxxx

Oh no blueroses - how truly truly awful. Can't even imagine how you must feel right now. Sending you, DH and your tiny boy lots of love - and know we're all thinking of you.

Hi blueroses, I just wanted to say I am so sorry for your loss. It's such a hard time and a shocking one too. I unexpectedly lost a baby boy at 20 +3 weeks last year and it was devastating. If you want to pm me at any time please do. Please take care during this time xx

Thanks for all the kind words. We are staying in the hospital tonight and being well looked after. I can't comprehend what's happened. We're just taking it one moment at a time...