Staying posifrickentive- Thread 8 for ladies after mc

[keys27]

Hi ladies. I am rubbish at this computer stuff I hope this has worked as we can not add anymore onto our old post.

Thank you both. Last time (before I miscarried) due to history of depression and meds, I was referred to a mental health team that specialises in pregnant ladies, I'm going to ask to be referred again. I know now that extra support is really important. I really don't want to moan about not having symptoms when others are struggling so much, but because I feel just 'normal' - no sickness, nausea etc, I just don't feel pregnant and it's making it harder to feel confident in things being ok.
My eldest son has behavioural problems and I've 2 young ones who currently fight like cat and dog, then on top of that, me and my partner are struggling not to constantly argue! There doesn't seem to be a light at the end of the tunnel right now.
Now I'll zip it cos this is ment to be a thread for staying positive! Sorry :-\

It's okay by to be positive all the time. The mental health team sounds like a good idea, hugs in the meantime

lynsey it sounds like you have a lot on your plate - and it's ok to off load here, that's what we are here for! I'm glad you have had support in the past, and know where to ask for it this time. It's all about recognising when you need it and asking for it. So you're on the right track.

I totally sympathise about not having any symptoms. It is causing me real anxiety this time around. I dnt feel pregnant at all and desperately hoping everything is ok but it's really hard to stay positive. How far along are you, do you have another scan soon?

Sorry my previous message was supposed to say it's ok not to be positive all the time!

Thank you by my dates I should be 9+1 but scan put me back, which would make 7+4 now. Midwife said she'll go by my dates so hoping that means a scan will only be about 3 wks away. 3 wks is a long time for wondering though!
A big part of my problem right now is just the feeling of being overwhelmed with all the problems adding up. I know I'll be fine in the long run, just trying to plod on!
Lucinda when is your next appt? I'm losing track of who is where with things a bit.

lynsey glad the wait for next scan may not be too long (Altho it still feels long enough dsnt it!)

I am 7+2 and my 8 weeks scan with EPU is on Tuesday. Seems to be taking forever to get there. Woke up this morning convinced it was Friday - gutted when DH reminded me I was a day early!! Gah!!

lyndsey i so feel for you, time just seems to stop doesn't it!

I took all your advice and have booked a private scan, and its tomorrow - I 'm so nervous and excited and terrified all at the same time.
I've also had 3 migraines in the last 2 days which for me is lots and they are totally debilitating, by that I mean I have a aura for about 30-40 mins where I can't see anything, my hands and feet go numb and i cant really make sense of what anyone is saying around me, then normally I get about 30 mins which is my escape to get home and into bed before the headache hits me, however these last three don't seem to have allowed me that luxury and just hit me with the headache at the same time as the aura.
My boobs don't seem to be as sore as they were a couple of weeks ago which worries me, but I'm still feeling nauseous so that give me comfort.
God I had this first trimester, it seems to have gone on forever and I suppose it has due to my previous loss and only having a a month or so between mc and falling pg again!

Hope everyone is feeling ok - I'll let you know how I get on tomorrow, doubt I'll get much sleep tonight!!

lynsey I'm so sorry to hear your feeling so so low. I know other people's stories don't help because your living it but there is so much error in these early scans they put me back a week at my 12 week scan I was gutted but when I went back 10 days later I was back to my original date and even a day ahead and I bleed a lot throughout my first trimester. I know what you mean about not feeling positive it's impossible when you have so much other stress on your shoulders as well and if you and DH are trying not to argue there can't be much support by him. I really feel for you I really do. I would hate to go back to the first trimester I remember everyday worrying everyday counting down the days to my next scan which seemed like months away and when I got them always coming away reassured but still worried. I agree with others speak to your midwife hopefully she can book you in for a scan before 3 weeks and put you in touch with someone who deals with depression professionally someone who can sit down and listen to you. Because it sounds to me and I'm so sorry if I'm invading your personal life and if so wrong but your also struggling with your two year old as well as juggling every day to day life and it's only normal to not be coping great especially with the hormones raging in your body it's causes a chemical imbalance in the brain and definetly sounds like talking to someone will help you so much.
My youngest DD is disabled and we just recieved a higher mobility allowance for her I come out of hospital yesterday and cried and when my mum asked why is said I'm waiting for that letter to come through where they say she does not meet the criteria for the higher amounts because it's just a reminder to me how disabled she is even though I don't see her in that way. I talk to a counsellor regularly about my youngest it's not a failure at being a mum it makes you a better mum because it clears your head and puts life in perspective for you and your come away feeling so much better after a good cry and reassurance trust me. I am hand holding with you and as east said were all here for you. So many different experiences on here but we've all suffered losses and that's why we're all so supportive. Come on for a moan or a worry anytime you can be sure someone will reply within minutes to give you your support. Big hugs huni and hope your midwife can lead you in the right direction.

Congratulations on your scan northern is there anything they can do about the cysts? Or will they just disbursed by themselves?

lex good luck for tomorrow Hun I don't blame you for booking it at all. I am sure everything will be fine.

hula so sorry to hear about your loss Hun. Looking forward to having you back with us very soon there's loads of positive stories on here of having a healthy pregnancy after experience a loss. This is the best support group on the net with pregnancy and losses. Take care of yourself in the meantime Hun.

dobby oh wow due date is here that's amazing even though I can imagine how fed up you must be feeling now especially with a UTI I am suprised they never kept you in to monitor you over night. Won't be long Hun don't take it easy though haha get climbing them stairs Mrs get that baby to push down. I think your be in labour by the weekend I have a feeling in my waters :).

Erm strawberry jam I weren't a lover I'm more into Rice Krispies with loads of sugar and cold milk. But strawberry ice creams with the jam in it I love so wired what we crave. It is full of sugar but your so right when you say it's only for a short time. I find juicy apples helped with my sickness and soda water.

Welcome to the newbies congratulations on your pregnancies. Hope we can all get you through the tough times.

Sorry anyone I've missed I can't go back a page to catch up properly.

Thanks for the well wishes I had my op on Tuesday come out yesterday however had a reaction to the anaesthetic so blood pressure dropped and got lots of pain and bleeding waiting for my gp to call as every time I walk I get stinging in my right groin however other than that it all went well. Hopefully this little lady will stay in until 37 weeks until the stitch is due to come out.

Hope everyone else is ok xxx

Hi Keys, hopefully the specialist will give me an idea today of what they are and what we do about it (if anything)

Lynsey, sorry to hear you are feeling low - it's entirely normal. I'm suffering so much with anxiety at the moment and it's all so overwhelming sometimes this pregnancy malarkey! I feel that my mc last time took away the excitement that I should be feeling :(

Hi all- big hugs to those who are struggling at the moment and well-wishes for scans and appointments today and tomorrow. It's such a hard time isn't it?

I have been meaning to ask if anyone's been taking low dose aspirin this time around or in previous pregnancies? I have been taking it for the first time this pregnancy since getting my bfp but haven't been prescribed - guess I should mention to the midwife/ consultant assuming things keep going well?

northern so sorry to hear your struggling with anxiety as well getting through the first trimester after having experienced a loss is so hard. Even after 12 weeks your still anxious as you feel no movements and your symptoms start to fade until we start feeling the kicks our minds will never be put to rest. Really hoping they can help you get to the bottom of the cysts. If there not causing you any problems I am sure they won't effect you Hun it's very common I had one on my right overy before I fell pregnant and I conceived on my right side there prob seen it since but nothing has ever been noted. How many do they think you have? Can see baby in you picture it's so lovely to see baby your be surprise how much baby grows over the next few weeks. I couldn't believe my 6 week scan then my 9 week scan the difference. hope you get answers to out your mind at rest soon hun.

backhome I was so tempted to as I had blood clots and 3 mc's last one being a late mc through a clot they didn't offer me any at the doctors or epu so I just took my folic acid as they put me on an extra strong dose. I can't see there being any harm what so ever taking it though. Mention it to your midwife when you next see her but lots of mums to be take it xx

Backhometothenorth - I have been prescribed asprin to take from 12 weeks (currently at 9) as I am almost 44 and it helps with possible higher blood pressure given my age. I asked if I could take it earlier (as I have heard about it being taken early if you have had multiple miscarriages). They advised not.
Probably worth mentioning it. Hope all is going well.

Consultant doesn't know what they are, could be due to a bleed or there's a slim chance it could be a partial molar pregnancy (although it doesn't look typical of one). Not great for my anxiety!

Back in 3 weeks for a rescan again - we'll see what's happened to them by then. Plus side is got to see baby again :) much clearer as its an internal scan.

Lovely scan northern sorry they couldn't be more helpful with the cysts! Hope ur ok. X

Well I have a streaming cold on top of the uti! Other than sickness and exhaustion and a few bouts of thrush I've avoided getting ill all through pregnancy. Now I get to the very end and feel like I'm getting everything. Cough and sneazing both of which hurt like hell with a thanks to strained stomach mucels where one of his shoulders is pressing by my hip and on the right side of my belly butoon where he likes to constantly flex his feet. Feels like I'm being torn into every time I move at all. Add in sore throat and I just feel missirable and unable to do anything.

Torn between wanting bump to arrive so I can take more than just paracetmol and have the possabilitiy of hospital strenght pain killers and an adjustable bed. But equally thinking there is no way having contractions with my stomach already feeling the way it does would be a good idea and as I can't breath through my mouth without coughing I've got no chance of breathing through the pain or trying gas and air. And the idea of recovering from a c-section with the cough I currently have fills me with dread. So think it might be best for him to hold on for a while longer in the hopes this is short lived.

keys I can't currently crawl up the stairs without help let alone attempt to go up and down them to get things going! Hope things settle down for you soon and you feel more comfortable.

Thanks for the replies ref aspirin dorothy and keys- I will have a chat with midwife next week

Get well soon dobby. Sounds like an utter nightmare xxx

So sorry they couldn't help anymore northern it defiantly does not look like a molar pregnancy so I really wouldn't worry about that. They love to scare us don't they these doctors then send us away for 2-3 weeks thinking we can wake up singing every morning. As for clots it's away from baby it's a mystery Hun I can understand why you have anxiety I think any of us would if we was going through what your going through. Have they taken any blood work from you? On a postive note Hun you have a healthy baby there growing away it's a very clear picture. Hand holding with you these next few weeks Hun wishing the days away. Big hugs I'm sure everything will be fine it's just the Unknown.

dobby omg Hun that sounds awful I can't believe there letting you suffer that pain. I can't imagine it I really can't. I really hope baby makes an appearance soon and they give you the pain relief you need. Big hugs (but not to tight) to you. Hope DH is looking after you xx

keys my lovely midwife has been on the phone this afternoon checking up on me. Unfortantly the best treatment for the strains would be anti inflamitary which just isn't safe at this late stage and even having something stronger isn't likely to make much of a difference and would likely leave me feeling worse as it would make me groogy. She gave me some tips on using my wraps to support bump while moving around which has made loads of difference. Labour ward would be happy to addmit me if I wanted but can get in very quickly for more mointoring if needed as hospital is less than 10 mins away. But treatment would be the same as I can do at home until labour kicks in and frankly I prefure to be in my 16c house rather than 24c hospital. The pencillin for uti has definantly started to work so I've been much more comfortable this afternoon just dealing with cold symptoms rather than a raised temp and needing to constantly pee. Think I might have stumbled on a comfortable position to half sit half lie in which only pulls a bit when I cough.

Hi all. I went for a private scan today as I'm at 8 weeks and there was a heartbeat. I'm so relived. DH and I both cried a bit with relief. Got to wait until 12 week scan now.

Northern I hope everything is ok. I really hope your anxiety doesn't get too bad.
Lex best of luck tomorrow. Let us know how you get on
Lynsey I hope you can access the support you need and let us know if you need anything

I would be the same I'd much rather be in my own comforts if I was that uncomfortable. Lovely the midwife called for you as well. I'm sorry there's nothing much more they can give you that's safe. The support for bump sounds so simple but I would never think of that. Just think Hun will all be worth it in a few days I still think baby will start making himself known at the weekend. I really hope younstartbfeeling better soon sounds so awful I'm so sorry your going through this xx

Fantastic news positivity so pleased for you xx

So many posts today it's hard to keep up!
Congratulations positivity that's great! dobby it sounds like your having a rotten time of it, I really hope you feel better before labour starts.
To everyone who has sent me words of support, thankyou so much, I really appreciate it. I saw.midwife today who was lovely about everything. She is referring me back to the mental health team which is know is a positive. She's also going to try and swing me another scan if possible. Also said she'll use my dates rather than what I was given last week so when I get the appt for my 12 wk scan, if they say it's too early, I'll have to go back and therefore have another scan! She's playing sneaky and I like it!! Really helped expressing my anxiety and having someone that is understanding.
Partner and me managed not to argue today too....Still had the drama of a phone call from my eldest sons school to say they'd had to take him to hospital to have his head glued as he'd been hit by a stone thrown by another child! Who needs eastenders when they have a life like this?!

Sorry for the typos!

Hi Keys, no they didn't do any blood work today but have said they will do when I go back if they still don't know what's happening. I've googled ultrasounds of molar pregnancies today and I don't think t looks like that either (today's scan you can't see the circles / cysts they are on about, but could see on the one i put on yesterday). Going away next week which I'm quite pleased about as means it's something to keep my mind busy on something else for a bit!

Lynsey pleased you are feeling better in yourself, doesn't sound good about eldest though!

Fab news positivity!