Shiny and new posifrickintivity thread for pregnancy after miscarriage.

[MrsGiraffe12]

Hand holding, fish slapping and general bat shit craziness :-)

Congratulations on all the good scans/ midwife appointments today! Praying its my turn on Monday... hard today as I work closely with someone who has just had their scan and announced their pregnancy, at least with my last 3 MCs no one at work was preggo (although practically all my friends have been in the last year!) Oh well, not in tomorrow so by the time I'm back at work I'll know one way or another.

Stopped by tescos and got a clearblue with conception indicator on way home from work - don't know if I should do it or not (haven't had a 3+ on any of my MCs so would be a good sign if I got one this time). Feel like peeing on five pound notes would be just as useful but can't fight the urge!

internetforever all of us miscarriers have been pee stick a holics at some point, there no shame, but there must be a point when enough is enough ;-)

Internet remember that HGC doesn't go into urine 'neatly' so don't do it if the 'wrong' result would upset/worry you IYSWIM. The same person can be 3+ weeks at one time, and 2+ weeks at another time depending on water, sweat, food etc'.

lovely to hear all the great scan news. I'm really struggling here with the heat too. Looking at the weather app it should be over in a couple of days? Or am I just being hopeful?

corpore about the breast pad thing. How did you manage without when you are feeding? Do you stuff a muslin down to the other breast when feeding on one side? Or your other side didn't leak when you feed? It is a geniun question because I have to use one breast pad for every feed just to catch leakage from the other. And it leaks so much they wet through the washables. I did use the washables for when not feeding, but always stuffed a disposable when I fed.

squizita the only breast pad that I liked are the lansinoh ones and I got them from amazon.

Thanks mrsg for new thread.
Hugs and waves to everyone

Really sorry in advance for yet another me-drama. I really would like a week where nothing goes wrong...
Just got call from MW to say 1 in 48 risk of downs. Amino recommended, although need to stop clexane for this. After 15 mcs including 3 late one, am frickin' freaked.

Sorry for squeaky, whiny post.
Still loving everyone's current good news x

cuppa don't apologise at all. I would be devastated if I hear that news too. Have you booked for the amnio yet? Keep reminding yourself that 47 in 48 is 97.9% that your baby doesn't have Down syndrome. I don't know the risk of amnio but it is really low too isn't it? Try thinking that you will be I'm the overwhelming majority that the baby will survive the amnio and will have no chromosomal problems.

cuppa one is right there is still a higher chance that your baby won't have downs or any other problems :)

I've been wondering I know when I book next week they are going to ask me about downs testing amoung other things I've always dismissed it out of hand before but is it worth having I'm 26 now I've always said that I didn't want to know so I guess me question is do I need to know?

Thanks ladies.
Felt like I was being leaned on re amino though. Need to talk properly to DH, but think he wants to know. It's the amino that's my real concern; after everything I've been through I don't think I could bear causing another mc! only to get normal results...

baby I had DS at 26, results that time were 1 in about 30000! No risk with bloods, but I guess the question is what you would do with results, and would it enable you to cope better? DH and I both work crazy hours, so would probably need to know...

cuppa, please don't apologise, this is the place where we can express our fears and talk things over. As others have said, your chance of a positive amnio is slim, so try to stay positive yourself, easier said than done I know.

baby, it depends on your feelings. I always wanted to know the risk, but for instance don't want to know about the sex. Others feel the opposite way. If you are happier not knowing that is a valid choice, however I am not sure how they deal with 12 week scans if you don't want NT done. Your MW will want to talk it through with you before she lets you decline screening.

toddler, in the early days, when I did leak a lot (and which I had forgotten), I used Avent shells. They are plastic thingies that sit inside your bra and can catch the other boob's excess.
I think I even sterilised them so I could keep the ebm.
I suspect I was lucky though, the leakage dropped off very fast.

cuppa I am a stay at home mummy everything business wise I do is from home as well so I don't think it would make a huge amount of difference I'm not sure I want to know because I wouldn't really do anything with the results at least I don't think I would. If the chances are that low at 26 I think I'll stick with the head in the sand approach

copore thanks for the avent shell suggestion. Never thought of using them just for when feeding! I'm an unlucky one that leaked one the other side the entire time I was feeding. And I fed for 18mo. Imagine the fortune I spent on breastpads. Obviously it's a lot cheaper at the end since I was only doing 2 feeds.

baby the risk is not based on age only. But also nuchal fold thickness and bloods. The important question for you is what will you do if you get a bad result? Would you need to be prepared for the birth so it won't be a surprise. Like joining the right support groups etc? Or would you consider termination?

cuppa if it's the amnio you fear, have you considered the harmony test? There might be a private clinic near you that offers it.

one I definitely wouldn't consider termination i think I would be better off not knowing simply because I'm likely to worry about stuff even more it's not something I had even considered doing before now but seeing so many other people do it I wondered if I was doing the wrong thing but the more I think about it the more I honestly don't want to
Know before birth

baby you are doing nothing wrong. It is wonderful we live in a country where we have the freedom to make this choice. To me I can't handle having a child with down syndrome. If we are so unlucky to have one even with the screening in just have to resign to the fact that I am very unlucky. That's the reason I took the screening test. And if the harmony test is free on the NHS I would have taken it too.

Many people get the test because there are things to consider with a baby who has Downs Syndrome e.g. they can be born with weaker hearts, feeding problems etc'. Some special equipment can be needed for their early months.

Of course your average modern hospital will have the equipment ready anyway - but it's not always a case of being tested with 'could you deal with their slower learning needs when they're older' but things like 'might it be dangerous to have a home birth?' and 'which hospital is best?' which are important considerations.

It's all very confusing and like I said not something I've ever thought about I mentioned it DH earlier and he is dead against testing his words " it'll be our baby regardless we'll just take what comes" I do agree but it worries me that if we don't know something could go wrong at birth because we didn't know if that makes sense all confused now

I live in wales, where NT not offered, so finding out now at 17 w.
onelittle, May I ask, what is the harmony test?

The slower learning and things wouldn't phase me I have worked with children with downs and I have friends with children with downs and I was already pretty aware of that side of it and the possible health issue I guess for some reason I guess it never crossed my mind it could cause an issue at birth it's more the safety side that's bothering me

cuppa that answers that I'm in wales to although last time and with DS I was offered testing for downs does it vary between nhs trusts?

If you were only worried about health issues, thinking about it would it not become clear on scans later? In which case you could plan birth after you knew?

baby blood tests done here at 16w. Nt normally at 12, but not offered where I live.
Tests also look at other chromosomal abnormalities, most of which are considerably more harmful (although much rarer), eg Edwards babies rarely live more than couple of months.
squiz good point, thanks! but how often/detailed are scans after 20 weeks?

squiz i would hope that if there were any health issues that needed addressing at birth they would show up
On scans. I had allot of scans with DS after my 20 week scan showed a possible issue with his heart turned out everything was fine but i would hope that scans would show if there was a major health issue meaning I don't really need the testing as the only worry is the health of the baby as opposed to anything else :) feeling a bit clearer about it now :) I must sound like a bit of an idiot but I really didn't understand it

cuppa it is a new test that uses fetal blood fragments and DNA sequencing to check for trisomy anormalities. If there is enough fetal DNA in your blood, it is 99% or more accurate. (It is new but I think there wasn't a case of it being wrong yet)? The test is noninvasive because it only needs a blood sample. A couple of hospitals in London are doing trials so you can get it on the NHS there. Cardiff will have private clinics providing the service too.

cuppa then you are getting the quadruple blood test, which isn't as accurate as the NT combined blood test at 12 weeks.

cuppa I will be paying special attention to what they say about it on Thursday now purely out if curiosity it seems odd that they don't offer it at 12/13 weeks here like in engel an guess that's the joys of the welsh assembly though I know when my waters broke with my little boy my community midwife couldn't check for me but if I lived 10 miles down the road in the next city/county she could have the difference in nhs trusts is scary

cuppa I'm sorry you've had this to deal with, it does sound like the harmony test might be a good one for you to consider instead of an amino, tho I think they are fairly expensive (for some reason I have £450 in my head?)

onelittle I fed DS for 10 months and never needed a single breast pad! Used them for a while but they always stayed dry! I did have a tough time building up my supply tho due to severe anemia after the birth, so I guess I made just exactly as much as was needed...