Pregnancy after miscarriage - part 4

[mygirllolipop]

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Hi all - fettle, what fab news - roll on the next milestone!

Taichi - I was advised to leave it until 7 weeks - and will be having my early scan next Monday. It's hard to keep the positive thoughts going - I'm having difficulty, and I'm spending a lot of time puking! It must be really hard for you.

time4tea - you're nearly there ... hang on in there!

Just to let you know that I had a phone call from work yesterday - the deputy in charge of staffing is concerned that I might try and come back to work too early, and end up back off again ... so asked me what I thought about work saying that they would prefer me to be off 'until the critical time passes for this pg' - not completely altruistic, as once I'm off for 10 days, the county take over paying for my supply cover, and they could then get in a subject specialist to teach my classes - which would mean continuity for the kids, and would mean that I could relax a bit more about setting work - which is nigh on impossible!

I went to see the GP this morning - very difficult - I'm at my most pukey and dizzy in the mornings, and she agreed that it was a fab idea, and has signed me off for 4 weeks from last Monday. Tried to phone work earlier, and it was shut because of the snow!

Means I can relax, and not worry about not being at work!

ejt

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firststar - I crochet - lots, and have already made a blanket, 3 bags (which I intend to sell, eventually) and some mobile phone cases ... I'm also using the days to catch up on the tv I'm missing by going to bed super early!

Today I watched America's Next Top Model (recorded from last night), Jamie's chef and Relocation, RElocation - both from 4 on demand - great!!

ejt

feeling so sad to see the news about Lissielou.

the news about lissie is awful - just thinking of her and her family.

Just woke up and sore lissie's news, can't help bawling, poor poor hun.

Thanks Daisy and Time4tea for talking about tiredness and what it might be, I'll get it investigated if continues, definately could have had more sleep last night though.

Fettle-so happy for you, what a relief. Are you sure your m/c one year ago was 9 weeks, mine all happened at 7 although at first i thought they were all different.

Elj-having time off sounds great, teaching is so demanding, I know. get lots of est and enjoy.

It is so awful about Lissie - feel so bad for her - she was so hopeful. Didn't she have a scan a few weeks ago - why wasn't it picked up then? Seems a bit strange - thank goodness she seems to have a lovely DH.

Thanks Uki for your thoughts - I know my 1st mc was a 9 weeks as the sonographer couldn't quite believe that it had all gone wrong - baby must have died that day or the day before the scan - she measured perfect for my dates, but there was no heart beat. Sonographer said she'd never seen anything like it - didnt' make me feel any better though!

have a good day all - esp ejt of your time off!!!
x

That's terrible news about Lissielou. So, so sad. The poor thing.

Fettle - really pleased to hear about your scan. I loved seeing my little beanie last week, I felt really bonded with it already despite the fact it was only half a centimetre long. Roll on 9 weeks eh? That is my big milestone too.

Taichimum, the sickness and stomach muscle pains could just have been normal pregnancy symptoms for you for these last 2 pregnancies and may not have been related at all to the m/c last time. I can't remember how far along you are but I think that waiting as long as physically possible after 6 weeks would be best in order to avoid the disappointment of not seeing a heartbeat simply because it is too early. Try to stay positive and focus on the facts...you ARE pregnant and you are NOT bleeding, that is all you know for now, the rest are just worries in your head.

I hope everyone else is well...mumpbump, firststar, daisybump, ejt (you lucky thing), time4tea, juicy and all the new people who have gone quiet (probably with worry).

My thoughts go to lissielou and her family.

Hello people,
ages since i posted, though i look in pretty often. hope everyone's ok, and managing to deal with uncertainty. gather news isn't good for lissie - I'm so sorry, and if you come back here, I'm thinking of you.
nearly 33 weeks here, and starting to feel like this has gone on long enough! i've been pregnant for 43 weeks of the last year, which feels like a lot. not complaining really, though I'm now SO looking forward to stopping work. And to getting rid of the builders, who also arrived 33 weeks ago... we're a bit unnerved by how much there still is to do (decorating the whole house, connecting electricity, bathroom, various bits of carpentry and plastering). Would just be nice to have some peace in these last few weeks!
anyway, small groans compared to most, and I'm thinking of everyone at the early stages. Fingers firmly crossed. xlf

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I haven't been able to find the thread about lissie, but gather that the news is not good. I cannot imagine what she is going through at the moment after the rollercoaster of the last few weeks. Lissie - if you see this thread - I am thinking off you and hoping that you find comfort in your dh and ds...

Ejt - what lovely employers! After my last m/c, my father asked whether I could have an extended maternity leave to reduce my stress levels during pg. I said I didn't think 18 months maternity leave would go down well with work and I do want to have a career at the end of the day... Let alone the money that we would lose - unfortunately, we are one of those dinky couples who were very hard hit financially by the arrival of ds1 and the level of statutory maternity pay!!

There seem to be quite a few of us who are around the 6/7 week mark at the moment - what a coincidence! Hopefully, we'll all make it through safely to September/October together... Sending out lots of positive vibes to everyone!! xxxxxxxx (crossed fingers!!)

Finally found the thread from lissie's hubby... I just can't believe it - it made me want to cry. She's had so much bad luck... I wish there was something that we could all do for her, but I guess that's the downside of the anonymity of Mumsnet... Do you know her in RL, firststar?

Morning all
yes lissie is definately on my mind too, very sad news, in shock.

I haven't heard from test, so no news is good. I think I will be fine though feeling quite well today.

Fettle- well fingers double crossed for moving past 9 weeks then, I just know it's rarer to have m/c at 9 weeks, so that's why i said that. think positive, rest and eat well you'll be fine and dandy.

Out of repect for lissie, I don't feel like putting this here right now, but if your bored today have a look at my post on due in August thread.

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Do you think it would be inappropriate to ask her dh to send me their address so I can send some flowers from us all? It's just she's been so open about her situation and shared so much of herself (which I could never do). And we would have been due around the same time. I just feel so gutted for her...

I don't think it would be inappropriate mump, he can choose not to give you address, if he thinks that it's not appropriate. i think it's a nice gesture.

I am gutted for Lissie, also due around the same time as me, on October thread. Her Dh has printed out the thread from his post and taken it to show her, so she will know know we are all thinking of her. It is hard to send something other than this when we are all anonymous.
Thank you for advice about early scans and Rubles you are right. I should not worry about something that has not even happened. After what has happened to Lizzie, I feel fortunate to still be pg at this moment.

mumpbump - I think that's a lovely idea - we'll have to work out how to pay you back.

Today is a milestone for me - I started to bleed completely out of the blue, at exactly this point on my first mc. I was at work, and had just gone to the loo after assembly as everyhting felt very damp - to find blood everywhere ... not great - I avoided that cubicle for months afterwards.

So, knicker checking is well and truly out of control today ... even though I'm having my sickest day yet!

Still can't get over lissie's news - as mumpbump says, I feel like I want to do something, as she has been so supportive to everybody.

very sombre day today

ejt

Fingers crossed that you make it safely past your milestone, ejt...

Hi Guys, I'm new to the mumsnet group, but I could do with some advice and this seems like an appropriate thread. I had a mc last Aug, started bleeding at about 8 weeks and ended up spending a night in hospital about 2 weeks later. I'm now pregnant again (yeh) and am about 8-9 weeks pregnant and am very nervous. Whilst I'm not bleeding, I've got lots of aches and pains in my tummy. I'm also full of cold which is making me feel rubbish. My first baby would have been due this month and I feel really emtional - is this normal? Any advice?

dear Pamelap, welcome and wishing you lots of luck. Of course it is normal to feel sad around the due date of the little one you lost (because a) whatever you feel after a mc is normal, no matter how deranged it feels b) all of us find it a hurdle)

I coped with mine by taking the day off everything (work, DH, DS, everything) and going off to a wonderful garden and garden centre and spending far more than I should . It was very inspiring, even though it was in November, and seemed like a vote in favour of a good future, laying down good things to come. Lots of people on this and other threads have found gardening quite helpful, but basically anything you find rewarding and positive and not stressful is a good idea. Some of us also have been using mantras, meditation and other religious and spiritual activities, whether organized or of our own devising.

still thinking of Lissie - it was sad like this when Nicola63 miscarried - I wonder how she is doing too.

Lovely to hear from you LittleFrog. Great that you are getting your building done now, we have a carpenter putting in shelves next Monday, and just clearing up after floor sanders have been in. All great stuff, but I'm getting very twitchy about all being on course for next week.

Thanks for thinking of me First-star - yes, 9 days to go. Feeling a bit more together throwing myself into preparations, plus there seem to be a few friends saying: do you have time to go out/ etc before the baby comes, so my days are passing more quickly. The knitting project is also helping. Plus I watched an inspiring documentary/tribute to Christopher Lloyd, the gardener who died last year, and he was having such fun up to his 80s, it made me think - OK, this year has had its ups and downs, but there's loads of time to move on and have other adventures. A good exercise in perspective! we all live from month to month when TTC, then from toilet knicker check to knicker check, from scan to scan... this time will pass and we can start each day anew (with a different set of challenges, but not as heartwrenching as what we have now).

End of Philosophy Corner!!! and sorry for the long rambling post. take care all XXXX

Pamelap - welcome to the hormone-induced paranoia that is us - the feelings you are having are normal - the edd is a really hard milestone to pass.

mumpbump - thank you for your wishes. I passed the milestone with no mishap.

My acupuncturist had to cancel my appointment yesterday, as the road to her house was impassable - the road where we live was pretty dicey too, so I was quite glad in a way - but today, I feel absolutely dreadful.

I've got my scan on Monday - I'm just praying for good news this time around.

take care all - hang on in there.

ejt

Can't believe that Lissie has had to have more surgery - just unbelievable.

Makes me doubly grateful for what I have.

ejt

It is awful about Lizzie and indeed we should feel lucky to be pg at this moment and in with a chance. That poor family

Pamelap yes it is all normal indeed. Every ache pain twinge or slightly moist feeling sends you into a spin.
Timefortea I loved your post and I think I will take time out on the day of my edd. Had a little cry thinking about you in the Garden centre.
It did make me think of going to the Japanese garden at Kew Gardens and do some meditation on my edd for some reason...will give it some thought

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