Pregnancy after miscarriage - part 4

[mygirllolipop]

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All this worry is exhausting, isn't it... Had my second scan this morning, exactly 7 weeks. Saw (or rather was told we were seeing!) a heartbeat, and the little pip was measuring exactly what it should be. So good news. Poor husband couldn't understand at all why I was still in floods of tears afterwards - but a kind sonographer said come back whenever if you need reassurance (much less helpful doctor though).
Am ever so relieved, as I'd really been wondering if things could be OK - compared with last time I've not been feeling tired at all, and I still don't really understand how that can be.
Twocats - interesting that you also touch wood. Your husband too?

hi everyone, thanks for all yr kind words. was at blackpool for weekend, had some spotting while i was there, so have scan tomorrow, i will be 11 weeks, so sed they might just take this as my 12 week scan. have had migraines las few days, scared to take too many paracetamol tho xx
gr8 news littlefrog xx

been meaning to post on this new thread for ages...

lovely news littlefrog - fantastic that the heartbeat could be seen so early on. It feels like it should be more of a relief than it actually is, though, doesn't it? I have a scan in the morning - I'm 12+2 - and I'm a bit nervous. Although going by my extreme exhaustion and constant weeing I'm still very much pregnant (I hope).

CM - hope all goes well for you tomorrow.

good luck to weewilliewinkie and caitlinsmummy for tomorrow - hope it goes really well. and thanks for the understanding!

thanks for wishing me luck. hope i dont need it xx

youch, sorry, i didn't mean it like that... sorry sorry...

That's great news, littlefrog - let's hope that tomorrow is as good for weewilliewinkie and catlinsmummy.

As for the touching wood thing and generally not tempting fate, DP understands why I am so cautious, but I think is a bit more confident about it himself. Although we saw various bits of my family this weekend, and even he said it was a bit odd to talk about the baby with other people as something definite.

I'm now 29 weeks, and my brain has left work already. Sadly, the rest of me has 8 weeks or so to go. Hey ho.

Hiya all.
Good luck for those women that need it xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Quick update, Katie should be coming home at lunchtime today!!!! She's gained yet another 5ozs in 3 days so she's now 4lb 10ozs & 3 weeks old today!! Where has the time gone?
Love & hugs girls.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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HK that's fantastic news - you must be so pleased!

Hi everyone, gr8 news HK, you must b so pleased. Baby is fine, was jumping around!! I am 11 weeks +1 or 2 days, but will still have to go bk for 12 week scan. Weird xxx

littlefrog, sorry didnt mean anythin by sayin hope i didnt need luck. Really appreciate you wishing me luck. It worked. Weewilliewinkie, everythin ok with your scan? Was it today? xxx

V glad there's good news for everyone. Hellkat you must be so excited about Katie coming home! Am having a really black day myself; not sure why...

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Hi everyone.

Great news HK - you must be so excited Katie is coming home. She is doing so well with her weight.

Caitlinsmummy - great news about scan. WWW - hope everything has gone well at your scan today.

Littlefrog - sorry to hear it's not a good day for you today. I had a day like that on Sunday and it was ds1's 3rd birthday so felt very guilty to feel so low.

Hope everyone else is doing okay.

hi

well, my scan went well - the doctor was absolutely lovely as she realised both dh and I were a tad nervous. She put the doodah on my tummy and I immediately saw beanie leaping about - but dh was frantically asking 'where's the heartbeat? Can you see the heartbeat?' I promptly burst out crying and she stopped the scan while she sat and reassured us that everything looked just fine. Very kind and patient lady. Booked my next scan for 3 weeks. So she dated my as 13 weeks today - next milestone is to get to 16 weeks!

CM - glad to hear you had a good scan too!

HK - Katy sounds great - you must be thrilled she's coming home! Congratulations!

LF - be kind to yourself. We all have black days - don't fight it. We're all here to listen.xx

Hope everyone else is doing alright...xxxxx

WWW and CM - that's really excellent news.

Littlefrog - hope you're feeling a bit better. I was very up and down at the start of my pregnancy too, I don't think the hormones help at all.

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thanks for your messages...

feeling a bit blue today...would have been baby's edd. Have lit a candle to mark the day. What else could I do? Trying not to wallow in self pity considering yesterday's good news but I can't help thinking 'what if...?'.

Hope everyone else is feeling fine today....love to you all..x

WWW - I feel exactly the same way, the pain of the mc feels so real still and this pregnancy just doesn't feel real. Am waiting for 13 week scan next week and I've been so anxious.

Passing the due date for the little lost ones is so hard - RuthLouise on the TTC thread just went through the same thing. maybe have a look at what she did? I'm thinking of you today, we love those little ones and are still their mothers. I wish you real peace in your heart.

thanks for you kind thoughts, t4t. You made me shed yet another tear... I did read Ruthlouise's message - she sounds so at peace with herself now. I guess I am too, but the pain still comes regardless.

As for your 13 week scan - it will come. I know how difficult the waiting is! Time passes...give yourself small 'goals' to reach before your appointment, plan something to do every day (no matter how small) until you reach the day of your appointment. I do this and it does help. I try to focus on other things coming up before my next scan - for instance, next Friday I'm going home to see my family for a couple of weeks - by the time that's over it's time for my 15/16 week scan.

Always here to chat...you know I know exactly how you feel...x

thanks WWW - I've felt very lonely with it all today, your thoughts were a big comfort. part of the problem is that we found out about the mc at the 13 week scan, so it seems an even bigger hurdle. Plus, now DH is more understanding (I got him to read the long thread about dealing with feelings of doom a couple of months ago) he'd been managing to put it out of his mind, but of course I can't. We;ve talked a bit more about it now. last time also I felt so sick, there was no reason anything might be wrong, so feeling sick and tired this time is so much harder to put up with, because you know it might all be for nothing. Also, like you, I got pg again pretty quickly - good in a way, but also, I'm going through the early stages of this pregnancy with the last one still very much on my mind...

let's hope we both get a rush of that famous 2nd trimester energy soon. none of us have an easy journey, and at least we've got each other (which is a lot )

www sounds like you're feeling a bit like I did yesterday... perhaps we expect a scan to be a huge relief and for everything to seem sunnier afterwards? and when it's just the same it's depressing. worries don't just switch off.
agree so much with what you and t4t say about the miscarriage seeming almost more real than the pregnancy.
Actually, on that, what have you done about telling people? Last time we had to tell quite a few people really early on (huge numbers of plans needed changing), but so far this time it's just us. I keep changing my mind about telling sibs/ parents/ closest friends - what have you done? Might it make it feel more real do you think?
Thinking of you www.

We had already told our parents and a my best friend too, as I figured they would find out if anything did go wrong. After yesterday, I told dh he could tell his colleagues (most of them had guessed already anyway!) - it does make it more real and official and even gives me a bit more confidence to progress. Everyone's pleased for us. Get this - I told my mum just after I'd found out, when I was only about 6 weeks - she said, 'though you might be - I've been feeling nauseous and had sore boobs for the past couple of weeks!' - turns out she'd had symptoms when I was pg with ds too. Weird!

So I would recommend telling at least your nearest and dearest - you need to widen your circle of support. It helps.

Just wish I could relax and take this all for granted, you know?

on telling people, we were very discreet about the pg that mc, and just told the people I'd feel comfortable telling if something went wrong. then ended up telling loads of people once the mc happened - I work with lovely people, everyone was concerned when I took a few weeks sick leave, wanted to know what was wrong, so I told my boss to be frank about what had happened and actually it helped, not least because quite a lot of people had been in the same situation and were very sympathetic, I got so many lovely emails.

now I tell people if it comes up - for example, yesterday I had lunch with my former boss, she hadn't seen me since the mc and was really sad for me, so it helped to say well I am pregnant again. its odd though because people are extra delighted, which i just can't share (I can tell I have my "yeah, whatever" face on ), even though they and I understand that given the circumstances it isn't possible to relax and accept what is happening.

so not easy all round

thanks both of you for the words today - I've felt unbelieveably lonely with it all - you've helped a lot. once DH comes in, I;ll try to sort out a few nice things to do for the next few days. You are entirely right about this www. Even when I just found out about the mc, I went to a posh cheese shop and bought tons of cheese that shouldn't be eaten in pregnancy, and downed some really fantastic red wine... it helped to make the best of things.

big hugs to you both and those other lovely ladies on this thread. XXX