PG after MC: sticking with posifrickintivity - today we are pregnant

[ChristineDaae]

Over this way ladies....!

So I finished the last thread by accident apologising for my awful typing skills! Sorry!
If anyone is on a real computer please feel free to add our stats list

Pixie how does your DH feel about his mother knowing 5 gongs like the scan date? is there any chance that when you find out the date/method of delivery he could be persuaded to add a day or two to your EDD? It might be worth persuading him if you can to give yourselves some breathing space.

He gets my concerns (he has got top marks for being super understanding this eve bless him) but he thinks it is reasonable for his mum to know on the proviso that she doesn't tell everyone else in family. I just don't know if I can trust that, somehow they all found out about mc

We have been very very clear that she is not welcome to visit until we say so (sounds harsh but think I've said before she pitched up morning after and stayed 4 days last time which I found far too much whilst recovering from cs and struggling to bf and meant DH had to sort her out when I really needed his support) and that probably means end of week 2 following delivery so I think he feels there's no harm her knowing the proposed date. I just can't shake feeling she might pitch up anyway and am generally feeling v control freaky about it!

I think I'd be a bit more persuasive!
I cant think of anything worse that ILs pitching up like that.
And as for the gossiping, MIL told all of DPs family about Ryvita's issues. DP was not ready. It spread like wildfire. I was seriously unimpressed.

That's so out of order, you must have been raging. I understand that these are their grandchildren but it still doesn't give them carte blanche to tell everyone they know all the ins and outs. I really hope I am a more tactful and discrete grandparent when/if the day comes!!

I will see how I feel come the outcome of the scan, I think there is further negotiation to be had on date disclosure

Morning all! Hope you get your MIL issues sorted soon pixie, sounds very stressful which is not good for you or baby right now.

Thanks everyone for all the great advice about seeing the gp. If it wasn't for you girls I might have listened to the dappy midwife and not done anything. You are the best

I just had a dream that the baby was here and she was so beautiful that I couldn't do anything except stare at her. The health visitor turned up and told me I had to change her nappy because I hadn't done it since the birth. Then she told me off as I didn't have any iron tablets (?) and I felt like a totally unfit mother. First of several weird baby dreams I expect!

pixie I agree stand your ground it's the same here but DH would rather a easy life - translation I get my way to stop me kicking off - we have a SIL that I cant abide! She walked out on her own kids and now they are sending gift tokens for LO and trying to get more involved! I've told DH I refuse to let any of them use this baby to get their foot in my door! They weren't as keen to be involved in my other DC lives (from previous relationship) and as far as I'm concerned they are all my children

Glad to see you back Cbeebies! I'm not the most observant of people and even I noticed that you hadn't been around for a while. Also, boys are great! I kind of always wanted a girl, and ended up with a boy (and yes, two more on the way) and he's lovely. Just keep a flannel or a muslin handy for nappy changes. That wee can go so far in so many directions...

Penguinita, I love that dream of yours.

I've been dreaming about double buggies because I've looked at so many on websites and ebay and gumtree over the last week. It wasn't even an interesting dream about the babies, just the buggies.

A question on Mat leave for you ladies - when are you taking it? I originally booked mine off at 37 weeks but given how much I am struggling at the moment am thinking of bringing it forward to the beginning of March when I'll be 34 weeks. This just means getting through the next 6 weeks which I'm sure I can do.

However it seems really early to go off work and (as well as the financial considerations) I'm really worried I'm going to be bored senseless. At the moment work is just about the only thing getting me out of the house and my job is sedentary which means even although I am often uncomfortable I can make it through the shift. I'm only 27 weeks now and I can't help but think the pelvic girdle pain is only going to get worse, but the truth is I really don't know what its going to be like or how I'm going to feel in 5/6 weeks.

Anyone have thoughts/experiences to share?

Saggy how'd the chat go with your boss? Are you now on Mat leave?

32 and a bit weeks here. My PGP is ok when I'm not at work but the couple of days after its horrible. Yesterday was the final straw. I couldn't move when I got home and I'd been getting stabby fanjo pains all day.
Having a good support belt has definitely helped though.
I haven't spoken to my boss yet, he's away for the weekend, but the second in command who I rang last night was lovely. And so is my boss in general. Hes made life as easy for me as possible and said to just say when things get too much.

kjh I've just finished work at 34 weeks. I couldn't cope with the commute anymore and remember how tired and confused (seriously, my brain just shut down!) I was last time when I worked til 38wks (albeit at home for last 10 of those).

I am a bit worried about getting bored but I have a lot of sorting out to do in the house and obviously have DD the days she's not in preschool so that will still keep me busy. Going to my mum's next week for the week as well for a change of scenery. If you can walk at all, can you get buses or taxis to town? I've booked in to get my hair done one day and have a facial booked another day with a pregnant friend as a treat. I'm also considering going to see some films in the day although feels a bit frivolous to pay taxi plus cinema just for me! I've got a good coffee shop round the corner I can still walk to and its the kind of place people do just sit with books so I might do that if I get stir crazy! can you get to an aquanatal class as that would pass time and probably help pgp. There's some ideas to keep you occupied

Bear in mind too if there is anything you've been meaning to get round to (in my case photobooks I still haven't finished from 2008!) then now is the time to crack on and sort them! everyone is different but I felt like it pretty much took years to get any time or energy back to do much beyond sort DD out, do a bit of housework and (after mat leave finished) go to work. Even when they're older and you think you can sneakily get on with your own thing they want to help you with everything!

Thanks pixie and saggy I guess I'll see how things go over the next few weeks. No point sticking it out at work if it is getting too much. I have a belt (they really are great - I definitely couldn't leave the house at all without one) and I'm lucky in that there is a cinema, shops and leisure centre just down the road from me an easy bus ride away. I'm sure I can keep myself occupied!

Kjh woth DD I worked up to 37 weeks and she was born 10 days early. However this time with the PGP, I got signed off at I think 33/34 weeks as I just couldn't face it any more. For the financial implications, if you are wanting to finish pre 35 weeks think about getting signed off, work can't force start your mat leave till 35 weeks. (Hope I have my numbers right there, my brain is officially mush lately!)

Hi all - couldn't find you!! Thank you penguin as ever for linking me back in! Haven't caught up on posts but hear that that all was well baking so pleased for you!!! Will catch up and post again.

Thanks Christine! I just looked through our maternity policy and it says 36weeks here so that's good news. I'm sitting at work wondering why I even thought about trying to stick it out until 37 weeks when I'm not currently sure I'm going to make it through to the end of my shift! My physio has advised the 'frozen pea' approach to dealing with SPD - not sure how me sitting here with chilled veg balancing on my bits will go down with my mostly-male team... At least the thought is giving me the giggles!

what are the frozen peas for? A cold compress?
I could work on I suppose, but given how I feel today it would be agony. i can barely move. I have lots of lifting, carrying, turning on the spot and perching with a tilted pelvis all of which just aggravate it.
Considering that im probably not going back afterwards, a couple of weeks less that end isn't too much of a bother.

I think anything frozen will do Saggy - apparently the pain in front is mostly caused by the main joint which holds your pelvis together becoming inflamed, ice is supposed to reduce the swelling and therefore the pain. Today is the first time I've had continuous pain while sitting still (as opposed to stabby intermittent ones) - as soon as I get home I'm pulling those peas out the freezer to see if it works!

I hope you have someone running around and looking after you saggy! Being immobile and in pain is no fun! Fx some rest will get you up and about

hello all! sorry for lack of scan update - still haven't sorted our reliable internet access downunder plus we were away at a family do all weekend.
scan went well - baby growing right on track so far. still it's only 8 weeks so i'm not getting too excited just in case.

Great scan news from saggy and baking!

sorry that I don't have time to catch up on all the other posts

Aly! I was really worried about you! I'm do glad you are ok!

Great news aly been thinking of you. so pleased to hear all is going well.

hello all.

aly great scan news, good growth and hearbeat at 8 weeks are good signs!

I have my 20 week scan on Thursday and am getting serious scan doom. I am sure my bump has shrunk and I haven't felt the funny prods that might be the baby since saturday, but that might be because I was really bury yesterday with family over etc. I hope this week goes quickly!

pg we are here to hold your hand til Thursday. I had scan doom with every scan. I remember talking to a colleague at work before I had my mc and she was due a 20 wk scan and not looking forward to it. She said she never felt she could enjoy scans and I just couldn't understand how - I loved them in my first pregnancy! now I know exactly what she meant and presume that's because she had lost pregnancies also. Scan doom is an entirely natural response to what you've been through but I'm sure everything will be fine. Hope baby gets wiggling for you in the interim.

kjh sounds like you've got plenty to do on mat leave so as saggy said why keep struggling. It's so worth getting plenty of rest in pre baby IMHO.

Interesting what your physio said about cold treatments, might try that today. My pelvis has really deteriorated in last 2 days and my coccynx is so swollen (another pre existing injury from a fall years ago). I think baby has moved position as it feels low down and my pelvis just feels very strained with weight of it whereas before it felt like baby was balanced on top of pelvis rather than wedged down.

Hey kjh, I'm thinking similar - I'd planned 36 weeks, but it feels different this time (I'm not in my 20's now, I have a husband that works away most of the weekdays and nights, and I'm also doing a pretty full-on job plus clinical doctorate) and I'm getting tired (27+3) already.
Thinking of moving to 34 weeks, but worried about going back earlier with such a wee one. I know people do it (hats off to them), but I've never gone back without husband being at home to look after the baby, so I'm dreading it - 10 hour days at childcare F/T etc.

Ugggghhh. Not sure, not sure, not sure.

Tea I just hit the wall and knew I couldnt do it any more. 2 weeks extra now is only 2 weeks less at the end. Its not too long.

Well 37 wks today and first day of mat leave. Had a good 10 hr sleep last night which I haven't managed in a long time. So now potentially 3 wks to fill.

Pixie hope your start to mat leave is going well. Hope your DH is managing the MIL situation.

Tea & KJH hope you work out when to start mat leave. As saggy says if your finding it hard then a few wks before rather then later isn't such a big thing.

baking congrats on your 20 wk scan last wk!

Aly pleased things are looking good at 8 wks. Think we all got a bit worried when we didn't hear from you.

Pgchimp good luck with the scan on thursday.