Due in August Thread Part 4

[ishopthereforeiam]

Hey ladies, as we hurtle towards 1000 posts and our third trimiester I'm setting up the part 4 thread.

Pull up a pew and or small with some

Estate agents are ruthless, we've been offered viewings around properties where offers are being negotiated and we've refused. Maybe that's not the way to do

I think I need to step away from Ebay. I've got two prams on watch, and I've just put a bid in on a car seat (it's from an Ebay shop, not secondhand). Eek! .

Ah, Poppy, am bit jealous of you being at C&W. That's where I had all my surgeries, my IVF and everything in between. I lived right around the corner for years and do miss it. They've been brilliant for me and I owe them a lot. That said, my wee local hospital round here is nice too. Just not quite the same...whispers I do miss London a lot sometimes.

Hi ladies, have updated the stats for those who asked.

Currently sitting in the living room MNing while DS is sitting on his potty watching Cbeebies. Am trying to potty train him in time for DC2 coming in August (he'll be exactly 2 and a half when this one is due). Have found that distracting him with TV while he's sitting on TV works as it means he isn't freaked out by focusing on what he's doing sitting there.

In terms of what I've done for DC2 - I have bought zero. Not a thing! Have dug DS's items out of the attic and written lists of what I have in each size and (to my shame) I have even colour coded things Have put all blue clothes in a box just in case this baby is a boy and have put neutral coloured items in drawers.

Have realised that I need nothing at all till DC2 will be around 6 months :)

Sorry Needlecuties I know what you meant to type but am loving the idea of your 2 year old sitting on the TV! I'm in a similar position to you re baby clothes and hopefully shouldn't need any until baby at least 6 months. Haven't done a thing about pram and cot though but not worrying yet. With DD we went from having nothing to spending hundreds of pounds in one afternoon at about 33 weeks and coming home with the lot. (painfully expensive but did the job)

I had my 24 week midwife appointment this morning. She thinks baby is lying breach but says not to worry about it yet as its very common at this stage. I've got protein in my urine so she's sent that off for anylysis. Hopefully just minor UTI and not a warning sign of pre-eclampsia. Heart beat was fine and I'm measuring right for dates.

Fingers crossed for a little UTI Faintpink. I've just had my MW appt and she didnt feel to see how he was lying but she did listen in to the heartbeat which he wasn't having any of and I'm measuring 25 (im 24+2). Im hoping this isn't a sign of things to come and I end up having a world record sized baby.
They still have quite a bit of space to whizz around in there, Im sure your baby will be head down when the time comes :)

Hello and hope the rain has gone for everyone!? It's soo chilly here and we have the heating on and it's almost May!
Hope everyone had a good weekend

On Saturday and Friday, my bump felt really large and I was so bloated and then yesterday it felt very small and again up until a few hours ago. I am wondering if water is bloating me, or lack of exercise etc... I just wish I knew what it is. then I can cut it out! Sorry, don't mean to moan, just feel so uncomfortable at times and then wonder how I will be in a month's time (eek!)

No swollen ankles yet but have got a nice purple thread vein on my leg that has appeared - bang goes that mini skirt!

ffscatmove me too, totally clueless in what to get - have looked at a few threads for example and got a little idea - but have been buying a few sale items and then realised that if it's hot in August, then newborn things designed for last season might not be right and then got in muddle about long sleeves, short sleeves, poppers, sleepsuits or 2 pieces and then I got some advice to try and go for the sleeves that enveloppe them so you can pull them down rather than over their head as apparently when they have a messy accident, the last thing you want is to pull the clothes towards the head! Wow, I wouldn't of thought of this ... here's a link to the type I mean: bodysuit
So have gone for different things - short sleeves, long sleeves, poppers etc and have tried for sale things as much as possible and also have bought more 0-3 months and 3-6 months than newborn so far. But not sure how much is not enough etc as I bet they grow out of them so quickly!
My MIL is knitting him a whole array of cardigans and hats too - so glad as I'll treasure these as they're all really beautifully made and amazing quality.

Hope it's just a small UTI faintpinkline

We have another scan next week - 4D one by the NHS next week and then a mw appointment too. Hoping she'll take my blood, and I know we've got to think about delivery plans etc as she mentioned it a month ago and I've done nothing since... has anyone started properly to think of plans?
(24+3)

marmite I've done nothing really re birth plan either, other than requesting home birth (being seen at home by the same homebirth mw throughout now which is lovely).

A question re measuring - mw measured me in cms so is it worked out as a cm per week? In that case I was 23 which is a week smaller than dates.

Am feeling heavy and uncomfortable this afternoon and could do with going home to bed but it's straight off to a rehearsal now to -terrorise- soothe bump with some drums!

I'm feeling heavy too today and a bit low on energy - think the bump must be going through a growth spurt or something.

Have people booked their antenatal classes yet? I booked onto the NHS ones but have since been recommended the NCT classes. Does anyone have any experience with either? Not sure if I should do both, stick with NHS or cancel NHS and do NCT instead. I've been told NCT classes are great for meeting other local pregnant people but surely you get that from the NHS ones too? I'm feeling rather confused and indecisive about the whole thing so any advice would be much appreciated!

fairtradelu I'm booked in for NCT as would like to use as an opportunity to meet other (hopefully) like minded m's & d's as much as anything and have heard good things from other people. Plus DP coming which will be good for him :)

How much are you all involving your OH in the shopping decision making. Always reading these blogs about getting the DPs more involved in the pregnancy and conscious I've kinda taken over, for the bits I have bought anyway which isn't loads (plus we're clearly not getting a pram I don't like the look of :))

Are people starting to think about birth plans now and discussing with MW? Did you see on another thread the lady who gave birth and bambino was 11' 5 - Made me a bit worried; think I'll be reviewing pain relief options!

fairtrade We're booked in for NCT too. On the pricy side but heard lots of good things about them. I think the NHS ones might be a bit too hospital-focused for me. I'd suggest booking soon though; not sure where you are but in this area they get booked up pretty quickly.

Heading into work early today as have lots to do. Must try and stay off MN so have a good day ladies

Hi everyone, Hope your all well.

Panpipe ive been feeling v heavy since yesterday, im sure baby must have moved higher up or something. Took me ages to fall asleep last night as I just felt so uncomfortable, and then taking ds to school this morning and everyone was asking where bump had come from as apparently I didnt look pregnant last week but now I definitley do. Is anyone else like this atm im 24+4 but feeling rather large today

Marmite Im really unsure about clothes aswell as Aug last year was quite chilly up here in the NW, But then Sept was so warm I just have some normal short sleeve vests and a couple of babygros so far a few cardigans and jackets and 1 pramsuit. So confusing though and really dont want to waste money buying clothes that wont be suitable. I have got some gorgeous knitted blankets but really need some celluar? (not sure on spelling) ones soon can anyone recomend any good ones?

fairtradelu I havent booked any yet really should though, my midwife recomended a active birth refresher course but a little bit nervous about it all tbh I keep thinking i'll leave it another couple of weeks etc but I know its getting closer so should really move myself.

Chocolate chocolate chocolate chocolate.

Wow I've missed a lot of posts in a couple of days! I've been exhausted and bump is really tight, and lovely and big, love it!!!
I can't recommend the Tripp trapp highly enough, my 7 yr old still sits on hers to eat and we use it as a spare adult chair too! In fact we have 2 of them now!!
fairtrade I also just read French Children and found it very interesting, especially the 'pause' trick!!

Hi all!

Hope everyone is doing well. It sounds like you are all being MUCH more organised than me and DP so far! We've only put a deposit down on a pram (Mamas and Papas Sola) so far and literally have nothing else, no clothes, no nursery furniture, no bedding! So much still to do

Sorry in advance for the next part of my message but need to have a bit of a moan...

I work for my dad's design company where I am a project manager but I also do the accounts for the business, the invoices, VAT returns etc. Today, my dad phoned while on the train to a meeting and just before he got cut off due to poor signal he said that he was going to ask me to carry on doing the accounts work during my maternity leave. He got cut off straight after saying this and hasn't had a chance to phone back in yet so I don't know any details at all about how he is thinking it will work but it's got me a little bit stressed out. My dad is a reasonable man and he would pay me for doing the work (would mean I wouldn't get SMP so would have to be paid at least that amount if not more to make it all worthwhile) and he is making an offer for me to do it as opposed to demanding I do it as obviously that's illegal as I'm entitled to maternity leave. My stress is coming from the fact that I think I'm going to end up in a difficult situation. If this was just a regular boss and not my dad I wouldn't even give it a seconds thought, the answer would be an outright 'no!'. This is my first child and I have absolutely no idea the impact that it is going to have on my life and you can't predict how the child will be health wise etc so it's impossible at this stage to know if I would even have time to consider doing this work. Also with the nature of the work it is not particularly flexible as there are specific dates things need to be done by each month, payments need to be made, financial reports need to be created, VAT returns need to be submitted. So there would be very tight restrictions on when the work would need to be done and with a newborn/young baby you can't plan for things like that as the baby could be sick one week and I have no time to get a VAT return done. Whilst having more money than SMP would be a bonus I'm just not sure it is at all practical to commit myself to something like this. I also wouldn't be able to come into the office to do the work as would have no childcare and I don't have storage/space in my flat for a desk to house all the stuff I would need. My dad has been amazing to me and my DP and has helped us out so much, including giving us the deposit for the flat we live in now so I always want to repay his kindness to us and feel like I will be letting him down if I refuse his offer but I really don't see how I can do the work. Sorry for the mammoth post, those reading this on your phone will be hating me!! Has anyone here ever done work while on Maternity leave? How did you cope with it?

Thanks for listening!

Hi all,

Picture thanks for the pram advice, sounds perfect for what I am looking for, so I have ordered and should be here by the end of the week!!

The3bears I know what you mean, I had no comments from my childrens school, even though I have been living in my comfy Yoga pants for the last month or so and been waddling around due to SPD. Then on Monday this week, got people asking me where my bump had come from and had I eaten too many easter eggs! I have been feeling heavy the last few days and noticed a difference when trying to get out of bed.....

alisoonmcg having just completed my last VAT return at about 1am this morning, I know all too well how much work is involved and can understand why you are worried.

On one hand it is nice of your Dad to let you know that you can still be involved if you want when the baby comes. I suppose he needs to know as he will have to get someone else to do it when you are off. On the other hand it is a big ask.

As this is your first one, like you say, you cannot plan or know how you will feel/cope with a new baby. They are hard work, when it is your first you plan soo many things to do on your maternity leave, next thing you know it has flown by and you have to go back to work.

This is my 3rd child and I work from home, so am worried about what I will do when this one pops out. It is my own business so I will have to carry on work after baby comes, but would love to have time off like I did with DD & DS as I was employed.

I would say thank your Dad for the offer but try and explain how you are feeling and that you would really like some time off after the baby is born.

Working to deadlines with a newborn will be near impossible no matter how organised you. I hope you sort it out, but talk to your Dad and tell him how you feel. Time off with your baby is precious as once you go back to work, thats it, you blink and next thing you know they are grown up. They money would be nice, but time with family is invaluable.
Sorry for long post.....

Hi alison

Oh dear! I am in exactly the same position!!!
I do the book keeping for my DH's business which is a UK subsidiary of a larger European company and so it has lots of internal processes as well as all the legal, payroll procedures etc. I feel your pain!
I'm going to work on it after birth but have a couple of weeks off only. I work at home though and only need a laptop which connects remotely to the office, I have files for invoices etc, a printer and desk, plus I keep all the personnel duties too. My job usually takes me about 12 days a month and the money is quite good and so I am happy to keep this going and as it's working from home, I can fit it in when I can at the moment anyway (I have been studying for a degree for the past 4 years but have had to take one year off due to August).
Can you find a solution that would work for both of you? Ask for a laptop so you can work at home and be able to connect into their systems?
If your Dad wants to work with you, he should surely want to make it as easy as possible.
Also have a rule that you only call on skype and not your home phone so you can separate work from home life. Plus stress to him that you're keeping your own hours and things will get done but on your terms... luckily things like the VAT return etc, you know their deadlines etc and you have some time to do them, perhaps you can work out ways to help you achieve them more quickly now?
If you really don't want to work though - that's fair enough!

Hi Alison, This is my first so I have no experience of working whilst on maternity leave.

I do have everything I need set up for working from home and even at that I think it will be a challenge to juggle work and new born. I am planning not to do any work for the first three months of the leave and if I get the hang of the new born by then, I will try to introduce work slowly into my day.

Would this be an option for you & your dad?

I know he isn't demanding you to work but it does sound like he is being a bit cheeky...

Hello all,

How is everyone? I've spent the morning shoving all the stuff from DH's desk into a massive box so we can clear the desk out and start to make some headway on the nursery. V satisfying, but am now knackered and bit sore. Just back from MW appointment which went well. AM measuring exactly the right size of bump for 24 weeks IE 24cm which is good. BP a bit better too which is good. Also had urine test done which was also fine. hurrah. Have to do fasting bloods in advance of 28 week appointment then have about a million other scans and appointments it seems from then on!

Re parenting classes. I would have liked to have done both, but there isn't a NCT class down in the Borders and I'm not travelling all the way up to Edinburgh each week. So I'm stuck with NHS ones. Oddly, they're booked in at 3.30 in the afternoon, so unclear how that will work with DH teaching. Could be I end up straddling two classes (ie end June/July) but that makes it quite near my due date. Ho hum, will see. But I do wish there was more antenatal choice down here, esp holistic stuff.

Off to finally put my feet up with a cuppa before I tackle the shops and the charity place to dump off some more stuff. x

Thanks for the replies :)

My dad's not back in the office until towards the end of the day but hoping to be able to speak to him about it then as sitting here stressing about it isn't doing me much good!

Unfortunately working from home could be a bit tricky. We've got quite an antiquated accounts system here which is only stored on one (rather large) desktop computer that doesn't link up to our server so can't be accessed remotely you have to use that computer. Also for the financial reports that get done you need to have quite a lot of knowledge of all the jobs that have been going on in the studio so that you can keep track of what has been charged out and what hasn't so would really mean that I would need to still be quite involved in what is going on day to day to make sure I don't make any mistakes with the reports. God, I'm not usually such a negative person and it just looks like I'm trying to think up excuses about why I can't do it. You're probably all thinking that it's obvious that I don't want to do it so why am I stressing about it, just say no and be done with it! Deep down that's what I want to do but just hate to let my dad down in anyway.

Right enough of my moaning, sorry! Has anyone else chosen the mamas and papas sola pram?

Alison: My advice is to go with your gut. If you are stressing out and don't think you can/want to manage it then say no. If you just aren't sure then tell you dad this and that you can't guarantee you'll be able to do it and if he needs someone he can 100% rely on then it might be best finding someone else for the interim period.

I am self-employed and have no idea what I am going to do yet. In an ideal world I'd take a few months off afterwards but think I am going to have to try and deliver some translations after only a month or so I have an income I can live off. Basically, I am lucky in that I can play it by ear, but I do envy those who are employed and get well-paid maternity leave!

Thanks to everyone for feedback on NHS vs NCT antenatal classes. I think I am going to stick with the NHS ones but also attend a yoga class and a birth preparation course by the yoga group to get the best of both worlds.

And finally, felt the baby kick from the outside for the first time today (22+1). I can't wait for my hubbie to get home so he can feel the little one!

Hi all,

Alison the fact you're stressed already, at the thought of it, is not a good sign (!). How about doing nothing for the first 8-12 weeks (6 of which you'll be on 90% pay?) and then consider using (paid) keep in touch days to do the odd bit of work and helping ypur boss/ dad out rather than committing to full time projects?

mrsm sounds like good progress on the nursery!

My bump now gets in the way of doing shoes up, putting socks on etc so I have to do so cross legged . Off for some spring sunshine later in the week, can't wait as really need a little holiday / baby moon.

Been so tired lately I really struggle to sleep at night but xan nap fine during the day?!

WHAT!!! Your bump is only now getting in the way of doing up your shoes??????? wish that green eyed monster were bigger.

I haven't been able to get shoes on without being cross legged since week 11 and i was a normal bmi before i started...

DH has had to help me get the steel toe cap boots on since week 14... maybe even earlier

alison - sounds like it would be a harder job to do at home than mine and so I'd probably be thinking the same. As it's your Dad, you're not really letting him down, having first baby etc and the pressure of lots of change is enough and so I bet your Dad can understand as he'll be the grand dad too! Also you're giving him enough time now to get someone in to do it whilst you're on maternity - so telling him asap is very fair I think.

Tie up shoes? Hmm... my bump has been getting in the way of one leg and so I topple over a bit if not sitting down!

Hi all, best check in as not been on thread for a while. Original due date was 1/9 quickly moved by first scan to 28/8 so just at the tail end of this group.

I found out I am having a little girl and up to now all is well with baby. I have hypermobility syndrome and know very little about it but have as a result been told I may not be able to have a VB and may have to have a CS instead. See consultant again in a few weeks where the decision will be made. Having a fair bit of bother with hips and SPD but to be expected.

Very Very excited for the birth of my little girl. Feel very blessed to feel this well (had no sickness or anything) and going to be starting sorting her room out in coming weeks and months so excited.

Don't feel much movement except when I had the glucose test and bits and peaces but not often I can define it as baby movements. Do have a rather spectacular bump though!

Hope everyone is well and happy!