Anxious over phone message from specialist midwife

[joosiewoosie]

Sorry to sound like a stress bunny or anxious annie, but can I run a few things past you all.
I got home at 4.30 to a message of the answerphone from a specialist midwife at my local hospital. She asked me to call her back tomorrow between 9 and 4 as she wants to discuss one of my blood tests.
I had my 16 week quadruple blood test last Thursday (as they couldn't do nuchal scan at 12 weeks scan due to a big fibroid in the way), and it is only the following Tuesday now. I'm really concerned that there is something not right with Bubbs due to the speed of the midwife's response and I'm already panicking and really tearful, what-iffing all over the place. I don't know if I'm going to be able to sleep tonight, not being able to get hold of the specialist midwife to find what's up. I'm trying really hard not to jump to the negative, but I was told that we'd hear in a couple of weeks if all was well, so I am really worried all is not well.
What could it be? Please help me to think a bit more rationally over this. The not knowing what she is going to say when we call her is going to send me loopy tonight otherwise.
Thanks MNers. x

Joosie my sister had a very high chance of having a baby with DS but she decided to not have any more tests and just wing it...she was fully convinced the baby would have Downs Syndrome but it didn't. It is SO stressful and as a fellow worrier my heart goes out to you...it's the not knowing that is hard.

Hopefully all will be ok.

Hi, I am another mum who had the phone message from the midwife.

I have been told we have a 1/120 chance of our baby having Downs. We have a counselling appt tomorrow morning, when I'll be 14+0.

We have decided we definitely want to have the amnio, which the midwife said they can do from 15 weeks onwards, so hopefully that will be arranged soon.

It's really helpful to hear so many happy endings - we have decided not to tell anyone about the hgh risk at the moment, so I am finding this all very stressful at the moment. Hopefully we will join the good news club with you all in a few weeks time.

vanimal - I was just going to copy you the link to this post, you beat me here :)

This thread documents our wait and anguish at the decisions etc we faced. I really hope that, if you have time to read it all, you will find comfort and hope in what we went through.

Be prepared tomorrow that the counselling MW might just say to you that the risk of miscarriage which they have to give as 0.5% up to 1% following amnio potentially is greater than your risk of Downs and will make sure you are comfortable with your decision. If you're anything like me you couldn't cope with not knowing! The risks with amnio greatly depend on who does it etc... I don't want to sound negative but at my counselling appointment the risks versus each other were discussed and I wanted to give you the heads up so to speak x

tiggy - have been thinking of you and keeping fingers crossed that all is well.
Good luck tomorrow, vanimal - we've all been where you are and know what a horribly testing time you're going through. I sincerely hope that all is well for you, let us hold your hands! The support I received was of such comfort to me, I hope we can help you through x

TiggyWhat fantastic news! YAAAAAAAY! Look forward to sharing your joy tomorrow!

Vanimal - it's a tough time, but with support from your loved one, a bit of pampering and being able to talk it through on here, you will both get through it! Stay strong in your wait for your procedure, do not over-google, and try and take each feeling as it comes. There will be many highs and lows, and you may just 'exist' for a bit, rather than 'live', but that's ok too. Keep as positive as you can, sleep, eat comfort food and go with the flow....and remember, your odds are not certainties. Even a 1 in 2 odds is only 50/50 chance. Your odds are so much better - and are more likely to be fine than not.

To anyone in the same boat as we've been - Hugs are here from all of us whenever you need them. (I was amazed by the power of cyber-friendship in my time of need - I hope you will be too ) x

Great news tiggy :)

So pleased for you tiggy

tiggy that is wonderful news, I am really pleased for you! Yay!

We had our counselling appt this morning, and the midwife could not have been lovelier. She explained everyting and gave us lots of time for questions, which were mostly us coming up with other reasons for the results.

The baby's nuchal scan reading was 1.7mm, which is within normal limits (3.5mm). The bloods were also all within normal limits, but the higher HCG and lower PAPP-A were the reason for the red flag. She did say that the results would not have been flagged if they happened with DD2 (when I was 35), but my age has bumped up the risk this time. DH was visibly relieved at this, which really helped me too.

She kept asking if I was ok - pale, and needing water, and I started telling her about my hyperemesis. I had a good cry about how difficult I was finding it, and she really took the time to listen to that too.

We will be going ahead with the amnio - its booked in for 2 weeks time on Tues 6th March. Hopefully the next two weeks will fly by.

Your hand holding and information sharing really has been invaluable - I asked about miscarriage rates at the hospital (v low, specialised fetal medicine unit for the local authority, so v experienced staff) and about Edwards and Patau based on reading your comments here. So thank you for that.

Midwife also thought my recent vaginal bleeding my have been a factor in getting the blood results I did, so it's reassuring to know there may be another reason for this.

Wow Tiggy we were the same...the relief of the 'all clear' seemed to send us into a 'it's really going to happen' spin, and a few days later we bought a moses basket, and have been looking at stuff ever since! Really great news!

Glad we were all able to help Vanimal. Let normality reign over the next couple of weeks. Be sure to pop by and let us know how you are doing - good or bad. I had some wobbles for sure, but knowing my cyber-friends were there to listen helped a great deal x Thinking of you x

Tiggy and joosiewoosie I can't wait to be able to tell everyone once this is all over either!

I have a quick question - how will I feel after the amnio? I don't have any family/help nearby, and the midwife suggested that I need to take things easy for a few days after the procedure.

I work from home, I wondered if I would be up to this?

I am self-employed and it's a really busy time for my clients, so I would just need to give them plenty of notice if I am taking the day off (they are lovely and wouldn't mind), but don't want to take the time off to brood over the results, as it is a welcome distraction to be working.

How did you feel after your amnios?

I was surprised at how tired I felt after my amnio - not sure if it was emotional or physical exhaustion... or both :) I had my amnio on a Thursday morning and did nothing for the rest of the day, Friends DVDs, daytime TV and internet. My DH had the Friday off work and I wasn't allowed to do anything, which I was grateful for as I didn't feel up to much. The weekend was quiet but normal for us.

The best piece of advice was to wear loose clothing for the procedure. I had a nasty bruise and I was glad I didn't have a waist band pressing on it.

I didn't do anything after my amnio for the whole day. The following day, DH chauffered me to see a group of friends, where I sat down like a slug. I felt emotional and physically exhausted the day after the amnio. 2 days after, having not been 'out' (apart from seeing friends for couple of hours) or done anything, I felt stir crazy, and walked round the local shopping centre for an hour with DH. We both needed that.
I was almost normal after that, if quite tense waiting for our results (we waited over a weekend for ours).
Defo take the day off of the procedure, and make sure the day after is slow and sitting!
Agree with soozy on the comfy clothes and waistband issue, although I was lucky and didn't bruise, but it was a bit tender where the needle went in.

Day off it is then :)

I also find myself really tired after pregnancy-related hospital appts - I was not feeling myself yesterday at all following the counselling appt, went down for a quick nap at 1pm and didn't wake up till 3pm! I guess it's more emotionally draining that you realise.

I'm having the amnio on a Tuesday, and should get the results by Thursday afternoon or Friday morning - I don't think I could cope with a weekend's wait on top!

Thanks for the loose clothing tip - I'm wearing my normal trousers with the buttons open at the moment, might need to dig into my old under-the-bump maternity clothes finally!

tiggy how are you feeling now? It must be nice to be breaking the good news to everyone!

Ooooh, definitely take it easy for a day or two, vanimal. I was exhausted, packed off the little monkey to Granny's for a couple of days and did NOTHING, barely made it out of bed! My brain suffered slightly from the daytime tv I consumed (ahhh, thank heavens for Frasier!) but for me, resting was the only thing I could do, the only thing I could control in the whole situation. The lovely Mr Biccies set me up a veritable banquet of fattening treats and I worked my way through more mini Cheddars than you would think feasible! Take it VERY easy, and be kind to yourself. It's a really stressful experience and you're bound to feel drained.
As the others said, you'll be quite sore after - I still have my bruise two and a half weeks later , though it feels absolutely fine - and comfy trews are a must. During the actual procedure the consultant pulled my maternity jeans so far down, I might as well have slipped them off, so perhaps something like leggings which are a bit more amenable, might be better?!
Hope you're managing to keep your mind off it all as much as possible and that the next couple of weeks go quickly. It's definitely all the waiting that makes it so hard. Take care

biccies I love the word 'trews', I thought it was only me that said it :)

My element of control (other than resting) was drinking lots and lots of water. It felt like I was replacing the fluid they'd taken somehow...

I said I would keep you all posted about scans and stuff. It's our 21 week scan tomorrow...feeling positive with a little apprehension after everything. DH keeps reminding me that at the amnio scan 3 weeks ago, all was 'normal', so it probably will not have changed in 3 weeks.
I'll post on here tomorrow, whatever the outcome.
Hope you are all keeping well and positive x