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For mums 2 be after M/C ... PART 5!

563 replies

hewlettsdaughter · 10/11/2003 21:36

Hi there. I was just wondering how everyone is - Ghosty, Hilary, Bogwoppit and anybody else who is pregnant after a previous miscarriage. There seems to have been a lot of sad news re pregnancies on mumsnet recently. On the one hand, I feel like I don't want to parade being pregnant in front of those who have had an m/c - on the other hand, we need to show that there are some positive stories out there!
I am 16 weeks tomorrow. Feeling ok, over the nausea I felt from about week 7 to week 12 or 13.

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madgirl · 03/12/2003 13:15

hi quackers, yes we saw a hearbeat but oh so tiny, talk about fragile. they referred me to gp now for ante-natal care, so that i think is a good sign. quite relieved don't have to go to epu again (well, fingers crossed) i had a horrid doctor who was so rough with her probe she bruised my "front bottom" horribly, and it is only just feeling easier. i will be thinking about you on sunday (or ws it last sunday) mgx

quackers · 03/12/2003 13:32

Hi again, that's terrible, some of these so called health professional have not got an ounce of TLC. It's such a sensitive thing and they should have some dam respect! That probe should hardly be felt. Hope you;re ok. Poor lamb. So they are not going to rescan unless you get any other symtoms? I am petrified of scans now. With my first, it was a wonderful opportunity to see your baby and enjoy it. Now it's just a place where I see nothing. I hope that will change one day. Good luck MG, thinking of you. Hang in there!

Hilary · 09/12/2003 21:54

Hello to all you who have appeared here in the early stages of pregnancy. It is a very worrying time and so many of us here know how you feel. I had a miscarriage last November and found out I was pregnant again this June/July. The first weeks went by so slowly and every sentence about pregnancy/baby began with 'All being well...' or 'If we get that far...' I didn't dare get excited or assume things would be fine.

At eight weeks I'd had a few days of sickness which tailed off almost completely for a day or two. I was so convinced that this meant the baby had died and my hormone levels were dropping that I rang the EPU, cancelled a mornings plans and shot off to have a scan. Everything was well but I was so glad I had been. (The sickness came back with a vengenace, unfortunately!) Don't be afraid of ringing up, I told them I'd had a m/c before and so was worried and they were more than happy to see me.

I am now at 6 months and once the worries have diminished, the time just flies by.

quackers · 09/12/2003 22:29

Thanks Hilary, glad you're ok and progressing well. It's just like that for me. Haven't told anyone really as they would think, God -
Madgirl - how are you?? Any news. Hope you're ok. xxx

bunny2 · 10/12/2003 02:04

Quacks,that's a good post from Hilary. still sending you loads of positive vibes. XX

madgirl · 10/12/2003 11:33

hi all, and quackers, you must be over 6 weeks now right? hope very much that all's well your end (!). i am wishing these weeks away as am still rushing to the toilet every 5 mins thinking i can "feel" blood coming out, and having terrible dreams about miscarrying. so thanks for very positive vibes hilary. i now wake up and force myself to think "it MIGHT be ok!!". i have no symptoms, as with ds, aside from sorest boobs in the world, but madly am wishing for sickness to make me feel pregnant. saw gp on wed and will now wait for first m/wife appt and 11-13 week nuchal scan. from lmp dates i'm 9 wks today, from scan measurements of embryo i'm 8. of course, now v worried about my embryo being too small.
how are you all, bogwoppit, hewlett's daughter?

quackers · 10/12/2003 11:45

Well, I think I have some spotting this morning. I'm gutted. There's only a tiny bit of brown but the sickness and sore boobs has felt much lessin the last 24 hours. I just don't know what to do. We don't have an EPU here. I usually go to my GP, but she's away and the other Gp is crap. My 2 other m/c's start like this light spotting, then full bleed a couple of days later. I am off today fortunately, but can;t even tell DH. Sorry for going on. It's not even when my AF would be due. My scan is Tuesday. I will probably have to sit this out till then.

quackers · 10/12/2003 11:46

Oh sorry, Madgirl, yes I' 6+3 today.
Glad you're still in there, wishing you lots of luck!!!

Bogwoppit · 10/12/2003 12:02

quackers fingers crossed for you.
i am so lucky to have a really supportive EPU here.
Hope it doesn't turn put to be bad news

NGPY · 10/12/2003 23:13

Hello

I previously posted on this thread as "ungrateful" and just wanted to say "Thanks" to everyone who posted kind and supportive comments here. Katherine, you hit the nail on the head, I have found it very hard indeed to be motivated to make the "lifestyle changes". I'm doing well with this now - remembering everything you're not supposed to have is getting easier. Also, I'm 6 weeks now, so I'm past the stage of my previous miscarriage. I've asked for a "reassurance" scan at 8 weeks. I will feel a lot happier if I don't have to wait till my nuchal to see if all is well. One of the hardest things last time was feeling like such a mug and an idiot for walking around thinking I was pregnant when I wasn't - IYSWIM. Another good thing is that my symptoms are definitely much stronger this time.

I have to confess though that I really do feel quite down and depressed. Much as I want this baby, I can't help feeling miserable about the ordeal of pregnancy and labour ahead, not to mention those early weeks, the vast cost, feeling that I'll be even more trapped by circumstances than I am now.... Don't expect much sympathy though, given what everyone here has gone through!

Good luck to everyone on this thread and thanks again to those who responded so kindly to "ungrateful".

PS my new nickname stands for Not Going Public Yet.

Original poster
hewlettsdaughter · 11/12/2003 18:23

Hi all, I haven't had much chance to post lately - we're having major building work done to our house and I haven't always got access to the computer. Hope it isn't what you think quackers, really I do. Sorry you're feeling down still NGPY.
I had my 20-week scan yesterday and all is fine. Those of you who feel like it is ages until you get to this stage - it does go quicker after those first few worrying weeks.

OP posts:
bunny2 · 12/12/2003 01:16

HD, that's fantastic news, I am really pleased f you. I have finished with Prof Regan book now so I shall put it in the post to you this week, Thanks again for it, it was so useful and gave me the confidence to ask for testing rather than lettting myself be fobbed off. Thanks again. I hope I never have to read it again though! Take care of yourself.

sibble · 12/12/2003 06:02

Quackers, really hope the spotting has stopped and you have good news at your scan on Tuesday.

Hello to everybody else I am new tot his thread but my reckoning I am 4 weeks and 5 days. Had miscarriage at about 8 weeks earlier this year and will be so glad to hit the 9 week mark then the 12 week mark. I am really trying to be positive and not think the worst all the time but every time I go to the toilet (which is quite often to check) I am so relieved that everything seems to be OK. Sore boobs have gone though which is a bit worrying and do not have much nausea but it didn't kick in unit about 6 weeks with Ds then with a vengence..

Dh will not talk about tia t all - just says if you think the worst it will happen - get on with it, partly understand what he is sasying but not very helpful.

Fingers crossed for everybody.

sibble · 12/12/2003 06:04

sorry about the spelling, am really tired and brain has switched off. hopefully you got the gist.

Ghosty · 12/12/2003 08:33

Sibble ... great news and welcome
It was good to chat to you today ......... try not to worry about stuff ....
Hugs {{{}}}
Quackers ... hope you are ok ... do post soon to say how you are ... hugs to you too {{{}}}
NGPY ... keeping all fingers crossed for you ... I know how you feel about the long weeks ahead but before you know it you will be towards the end like me (32 weeks now) and moaning about being too fat and having nothing to wear ... hugs coming your way and can't wait to find out who you really are (I am presuming that you are a regular MNer ... )
HD ... 20 weeks ... wow .... half way there! Hugs ...
In fact, I am in a huggy mood so hugs to everyone!!

quackers · 12/12/2003 11:58

Thanks all, I've been posting on the m/c threads. It's not good news though. No symptoms really now and spotting a little, which is how all my m/c's have started. Unbelieveable realy isn't it. Ging to sacn on Tuesday and they will hopefully do the ERPC and take the 'tissue' for testing.
Good luck all, good to hear some good news. xxxxx

Original poster
hewlettsdaughter · 13/12/2003 22:58

Good luck tomorrow quacks. And thanks for your kind words, bunny. I'm glad the book was helpful.
Sibble - hi, congrats on your pregnancy! I didn't feel many symptoms until 6 (7?) weeks in, so try not to worry too much about that. It's great that you're trying to be positive (though we're all here for when it's hard-going).
Ghosty - how are you feeling about things? Are you scared/looking forward to the new baby or (more likely) a mixture of emotions?

OP posts:
quackers · 14/12/2003 11:55

Thanks HD, will let you know how it goes.xxx

SpringChicken · 14/12/2003 11:58

Good luck for today Quack's
Not sure what time your appointment is but let us know how you get on!

Ghosty · 14/12/2003 12:09

Thinking of you today Quackers ... let us know how you are ..... xxxxx {{{{{}}}}}

HD ...
I am on a bit of a rollercoaster ride to be honest ... I am no longer scared but am beginning to accept the inevitable. I am really looking forward to meeting my baby but am not looking forward to the sleepless nights etc and going back to all of that. The good thing is that, unlike with 1st child when you think it will last forever, you know that the hard bit is over really quickly really.
I think when you are pregnant after having had a miscarriage it is very hard to admit that you are a) not enjoying your pregnancy or b) not looking forward to having the baby because you feel guilty and there is always the fear that if you moan you tempt fate .... or at least that is the way that I see it. So although I go through days of ecstatic joy that I am nearly full term I also go through days of dread .... but hate to admit it .... IYSWIM?????
Sorry for the ramble ........
How is everyone else?????

quackers · 15/12/2003 12:15

As you've probably heard it was GOOD NEWS!!!
They found a heartbeat!!! I was gobsmacked. I'm 7 weeks and keeping fingers croosed for the next 33! Try and get another one in a couple of weeks just to make sure!

Ghosty, how many weeks are you now??? It has flown, well has for me anyway!!

Lazyeye, good luck with your nuchal tomorrow, be thinking of you. xxxx

Azure · 15/12/2003 12:38

Quackers - wonderful, wonderful news. Best of luck for a healthy pregnancy.

quackers · 17/12/2003 11:53

Lazyeye, how did it go chuck??

COLETTE1210 · 17/12/2003 20:17

HI QUACKERS I TOOK YOUR ADVICE AND CAME TO THIS THREAD. I HAVE TO CATCH UP NOW AND READ ALL THE ALL THE POSTS. THANKS

Hilary · 01/02/2004 22:36

Ghosty, when are you due again? I have lost track of time. Are you ok?

How's everyone else?

I only have 4 or 5 weeks to go now, I never thought I'd get to this stage in those early weeks but I'm here and feeling more achey than I thought possible! Oh well. Not long to go now.