November 09 - rolling, laughing and cutting teeth ... but us mama's are still not getting sleep!!

[scarlotti]

New thread for us

Should I mention here that we sent written christening invitiations?? No, probably not

SirB good for you re the form although I wonder if the same answer will come as from the last form. Guess giving yourself a timeframe to get things moving might be an idea? Meant to say if you wanted any help flat hunting/viewing then let me know. Am pretty good at that sort of thing and am happy to lend my support have a good nose around
Horay for the bargain shopping, never would have bought it if you weren't there though

Right, off into town to re-register DS1 - as we have since married he has to be re-registered as a child of the marriage load of old cobblers as far as I'm concerned but a legal requirement apparently. Bet you anything they charge me for another birth certificate!!

Hmm, lots of 's here - sleep deprivation turning to hysteria I wonder!!

scarlotti!!!!! No, you shouldn't mention the written invitations! I didn't even know such a thing existed! How can I be angry with the in laws when you're around?!

Ursi DP and I do agree on our parenting decisions... as much as someone who lets me make most decisions can do! He probably doesn't know enough about things like BLW to be able to explain it after polite enquiries from his parents but to be fair I find it a bit difficult to summarise as well! My mum has actually been very diplomatic, our son is her 8th grandchild and the 1st on DP's side. My mum has reminded us that things have changed significantly since her generation were the parents and she has had 7 grandchildren before Ethan was born to get used to the new way of doing things. I appreciate that, I just wish DP's family would respect him enough to let us get on with it, rather than trying to railroad him into things like "He should be in his cot by now!" and "You're not feeding him yet?!?!".

And on the subject of the stag do, it hasn't been suggested that they have a joint do so I don't think DP would be comfortable making the suggestion himself. There would be a lot of the same guests but my brothers all have families and probably wouldn't want to pay the £500 or have two nights away from their wives and children, so I expect he'll just have a night out fairly locally.

DWB We had a low-key christening for ds's, so didn't send out christening invitations, just asked everyone instead. Am having trouble organising dd's one as step-mil is going to a wedding on the day we wanted ours and she would like to wear the outfit bought for the wedding to the christening as well. so it has to be after! And am also having trouble pinning down planned Godmother on what day she is free, she says "whenever you like." when I ask her when would be good for her but every day suggested she is working. Is there anyway of changing Godparent without offending person asked?? Probably not, but am seriously considering it.

DWB Try and see it from another side and you might find it easier to cope with. The decisions your DP takes with his first child either validate, or invalidate, the choices they made with their children. Can be hard to take if your child chooses to do things differently to you - I have a 15 year old and sometimes it does feel as though she rejects what I've done. Not logical but then what is most of the time.
Also, if they are happy to give an opinion, whilst that can be a pita at times it can also be helpful. My IL's don't offer opinions on anything, and so my DH has never been told whether he's being a good husband/dad etc. He doesn't think that he needs to check out what he's doing against any benchmark - sadly in our situation that's contributed to our problems. He doesn't know what the plate is in order to step up toi it iyswim.
Grit your teeth into a smile, and just repeat to yourself 'they only say these things because they care' .. and then breathe!!

I'll try, scarlotti. I know we should be pleased they are making suggestions but it always seems to be criticisms. Maybe I'm a bit overly sensitive but DP has an elder brother who is treated as if he is the best thing since sliced bread. I just wish they showed DP a bit more respect as he is really feeling it just now.

Ethan is lying on the other sofa at the moment, hopefully going for a nap. Whenever I glance over he's grinning at me.

just a quick hello,
things are mad here at the minute. I finally gave in and gave Hen some solids and we have sleep! he now only wakes once a night. (which is much better than the 3-6 times he was waking)
scarlotti sorry I missed your birthday, belated happy birthday, hope you had a great day.

will try and pop back on later and catch up with whats be going on.

Just popping to join the Wide Awake Club, or rather James is. I've had 3 hours sleep each of the past two nights - argh!! He is just feeding non-stop. At least hourly in the day, but last night he only slept between 1 and 5am and then it was for 45 min bursts before feeding again. I feel drunk on lack of sleep.

It feels like he's been having a growth spurt for a month! I am seriously considering weaning, especially after reading this about the latest research (guidelines seem to have changed back to 4-6 months in US, France, Germany...)

Raggie I liked indie bride too (DWB - look under Kvetch). Are you joining the book group discussion on Brooklyn later?

DWB We had a reading which is not religious, but we had to convince our civil registrar of this as it mentions heaven:

Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

by WB Yeats

It's a poem I love and also from a book I love (84 Charing Cross Road). We didn't get anything engraved on our rings, but I thought if I had 'tread softly' would have been an option as it's a nice sentiment for marriage and for life. Give and take and kindness and all that!

Typically James has gone to sleep for the first time today and now we have to collect DD... Hope everyone is well and good luck for tomorrow mr pavlov

Laugs thanks, haven't come across that before. DP knew the quote from the film Equilibrium apparently. It's a possible!

Laugs this is such a beautiful poem, I haven't seen it before. Did you read Black Swan Green in the end? I did after you mentioned it and loved it. It was another story I wanted to go on. I wish David Mitchell would be more prolific, his next book is not due out till next year I think.

DWB Good to hear that Ethan's sleep is better. Lucy does the same thing: thrashes her head just before falling asleep. I read that it's a mechanism some babies use to nod off, but it sure looks violent. She's still in her crib, with the bumper around. We'll probably have to think about moving her soon, although the cot will not fit in our bedroom... Sorry to hear about you trials with DP and his family.

Scarlotti belated happy birthday!

SirBoob I was shocked to read about your weekend from hell. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Wook sorry about the job. But what fab news about your son, congratulations.

Pavlov hope it goes well for DH.

It's so bad to read about all the problems with sleep, tummies, bugs, etc. Hobnob, BBL, all mums of more that one, puts me to shame really, having moaned about just having one...

It has been a dark couple of weeks, though. Lucy's tummy troubles have gone on for about seven weeks. She's been on Infacol for about a week and there is an improvement. Stupid me for not trying it earlier. I stuck to gripe water, but it did diddly-squat for her in the end. The screeching and angry farting, day and night, oh, it was awful (couldn't mumsnet at all, that's how bad it was ). A few nights I very nearly lost it, did not burst out at her, I would not do that. But I did think 'what else do you want me to give, child??, there's nothing else...' Felt awful. All I could do was just remind myself that she didn't do it on purpose. Poor thing was in such pain. She's still not completely fine, but the difference is great.

She does seem to follow a daily pattern now. Wake up 6-7, her morning feed takes about three takes - doesn't seem that interested in food first thing. Nap after 2-2.5 hrs, another one around lunch, another one in the afternoon, bed 6.30-7.30. I feed her to sleep at night and sometimes during the day, too. She usually feeds twice in the night, but I started to leave her when she wakes and doesn't cry and sometimes she'll just go back to sleep. Last night she fed at 11.30 and then managed to last until 6am (!!)

I have given her a spoon to play with and have just bought a sippy cup today. Can't wait to start weaning! She's really interested in watching us at the moment.

She's also discovered her voice recently, or rather its volume and we have a new game here, too: when she feeds she blows instead of sucking and makes funny noises at it . All in all, I must say this motherhood lark is much more enjoyable than I ever thought it would be at this stage (well, when she's not griping anyway).

Ever so sorry for this mammoth of a post but I have mammoth mn withdrawal symptoms. Wishing all a good night, xx.

dwb I was going to suggest your dp share his brothers stag do but ursi beat me to it! I agree though that stag and hen do's seem to be getting out of hand. Last year dh went to a stag do in Las Vegas (whilst I was heavily pregnant I hasten to add!) and then was invited to the 2nd stag do for all those that couldn't afford Las Vegas, but was still a weekend away in this country, ridiculous!

Had a better nights sleep last night although Millie woke up just as I was going to bed. I fed her and put her in her cot and she woke up again 10 mins later so dh got up with her. At midnight he brought her in to me and I fed her again. She slept until 3.30am and then I co slept with her until 7am this morning.

I am blw Millie and she seems to be enjoying gnawing away on lot's of different food but rather than swallowing she then spits it out. Is anyone else finding this? I'm presuming this is quite normal and that she'll eat properly soon. I was hoping weaning would make her sleep better but thats not going to be the case if she's not digesting anything!

Evening ladies, Hope you've all enjoyed some lovely sunshine today.

Wanted to ask if anyone knows how breast feeding friendly France is? We're booked to go there in June for a holiday.

Sorry I've not had a chance to catch up on posts. I will have a look now!

Cross posts skorpion nice to see you back and glad Lucy's tummy troubles seem to be on the mend!

Thanks Helips, glad you had a better night, too.

Meant to add, for those with dry hands, I got a prescription for Diprobase emollient. Doesn't smell pretty, but is really good.

Skorpion everyone has thought that at some point for some reason, I hope you're not beating yourself up over it x

AHH that posted before it should have done

Fruit I know they are a generally Catholic country, but are also very family orientated. So you shouldn't really have much of a problem, I wouldn't think. Here's a link for you, HTH

Skorpion, meant to say, also have a loud sproglet here too - and am pretty sure someone swapped my baby for a dolphin at some point. He is so high pitched, even he can't always reach the notes

Helips we started on purées, but for the first few days a lot of it was more about the change in taste and texture rather than actually eating it. Now he quite happily wolfs down 3oz at a time and looks for more!!

Tigger yey for better sleep!!

Bryn fussed about going to sleep, but I had some friends from 6th form here - reminded me why we always had to bunk rush our essays I do love them. It sounds cruel, but I feel slightly better about myself hearing that the bitches rest of the girls haven't stayed in touch with them since they left either One of the had been there seven years, so had grown up with these girls. But hey - we still have our little group of three. These are the same girls who were mysteriously in Haywards Heath town the day after I gave birth at visiting time Was so lovely to catch up.

Laugs that takes me back to A level english lit

Morning

Up with the dawn again today, it's starting to not be funny anymore Not sure what to do tbh, so going to try and extend the 4am feed later in the hope that then he'll sleep longer to begin with. I even had towels stuffed at the top of the curtains last night to try and block out the light. Worked a bit. Think he was also a bit cold and a full nappy so maybe a chilly bottom woke him too? Am going to have to start going to bed at 8pm if my day is starting at 5am!

Some of my things on ebay have sold!! Hooray! Going to list some shoes today - bought some lovely LKBennett ones but they're a bit too tight so hoping I can get some money back. It's making me feel old too, there was a time I'd have squeezed into them and put up with the pain!!

Morning All.

Sorry, Scarlotti, about your early starts. I've just put away my maternity stuff for next time...

What a freak of a night! Lucy went to bed at 7, woke a couple of times with bad tummy which was sorted with some cuddles, and slept until 6am without a break. I'm too shocked to jump up and down about it. Oh, and my watermelon boobs won't let me. Don't expect a repeat any time soon.

Ooh congrats skorpion! These babies, eh? They are so unpredictable. As my MIL keeps telling me - as soon as you think you've got something cracked, she is sure to change. Did I dream that you texted me or have I just deleted it by mistake? If you did, I am sorry to have seemingly ignored you, if you didn't...in town any time soon?

Laugs ig you're around. I haven't read anything by Toibin before, just borrowed Brooklyn for hol. Have you? What would you recommend?

Raggie - I know! You didn't imagine it, but don't worry about it. I'll be there next Tuesday I think, if you're up for a coffee.

skorpion meant to say it's nice to see you back good news on your night, a chance to recharge even if it's not repeated!

Ioan has been up in the air all day with his naps, hasn't had a long stretch on any of them. Sigh. Oh well, he's off to the CM in a bit for a settling in session so they'll have to deal with it!

skorpion it's so good to hear I'm not the only one with a baby whose tummy is so windy and painful. I'd forgotten about infacol so may give that a go. Do you have any other tips for how to deal with it? Isla won't let me do bicycle legs any more and she holds her tummy rigid so massage is of little use. My only success is having her over my shoulder and bouncing. But it only works sometimes. It's waking her up at night and, like scarlotti, she won't go back to sleep again, even when in bed with us. So we're trying to doze whilst she it thrashing about and griping. She is currently on my knee saying 'bvvvvv' which, like her sister, is code for 'I need a fart'. She slept for 40 mins this morning in her car seat and got woken up by the noise at baby group. By all logic she should be shattered but she just can't stay asleep. I got her down this afternoon in her cot but only for 10 mins. We've had cuddles, clean nappy, songs and left her to cry. No luck. I'm tired, exasperated and verging on irrationally angry. This is meant to be my DD1-free afternoon where I get stuff done. Instead I've been pounding the village streets, walking round and round the bumpy playing field and pacing the house to no avail. She is quietly sucking her fingers whilst staring out the window. I think we're both out of favour with each other. Poor thing must be in so much pain and I am so unsympathetic.

Sorry my posts are so mememe. I think I've lost my emotional literacy.

scarlotti the HV is actually really supportive but we're at the point where nothing much can be done other than moving to that nasty formula, which I'm not prepared to do. So I just need to bear that in mind and get grip of myself and deal with this a bit more lovingly.

Sorry, posted instead or previewed.

helips I'm determined to try BLW too but aware that it may be months before she digests anything. Which doesn't help when everyone I know is suggesting that weaning will help, when am I starting, and what about baby rice now? FGS if her tummy isn't dealing with my milk food won't be any different!

Gotta go, the illusion of peace has been shattered again.

Hobnob I can sympathise with the feelings... it is horrible when you're feeling angry and can't really control it. I always feel like such a horrible mother. I'm sorry that Isla is still suffering. Lucy does the same, goes rigid from head to toe and goes 'bvvvv', but through her nose, if that makes sense. I found she calms when I hold her and pat her bottom, especially at night when her tummy wakes her up. For some reason this makes her go to sleep... I do the over the shoulder thing too, but haven't tried bouncing. I would say infacol seems to be the thing that helped. I thought at the begining that I wouldn't bother, it takes two weeks to start working and it's only a phase, she'll grow out of it before it starts taking effect.... ha! Well two or three weeks in I'd forgotten about it and kept using gripe water. But it took just a couple of days to start working so give it a go. Good luck. Must dash, screaming baby.