June09: First birthdays coming up, we're on the move!

[June2009]

Happy Mother's day Juners ;)

Flying post from me...

C had a brilliant time at her bday party. The cake was a lot smaller than I thought (and the shop could not find it when we went to pick it up!) but it was yummy.
dh just ignored mil and her family, they did not mix with anyone and rushed to get the cake out so they could leave which was a bit . At least dh relaxed after that. db confirmed mil's behaviour is not normal and he can see how sil could get on one's nerves.

I went back to the gym today, thanks for your tips choccie, I managed 10 minutes running in one go this time but couldn't run anymore after that, went on to do some other exercises.
Are you on a strict diet as well?

meet up: do you want to do weekday or weekend? We can be available any pm (weekday or weekend), I would imagine dh will like to come if he can free himself up as well.
What can you guys do?

sam God not offended at all, don't worry! I assumed you were busy, I know what it's like

gauchita that sounds scary, I hope it was a one-off. that your dh tapes the matches, that's like almost 5 hours of non stop football when he gets back from work, you must be pulling your hair out!

bigcar stressfull situation with your dd, I hope she's ok and the school pulls themselves together!

allsheep sorry to hear about the bug, had you moved yet? How's your new place?

mrsmc glad to hear your mum is over there, I hope you get to have some me-time.
Having two sounds quite hard, we're thinking about ttc and I keep trying to put myself in a position where we'd have two and I just can't imagine it. How do you do anything??
I realised this weekend I'm going to be 34 this year and always assumed I'd have at least 2 by 35....

snow how is it going?

lynn chicken pox hope it goes away fast, what a shame it's happening as it is so hot. do you have a ball-pool? We've kept C entertained for hours with ours. (She throws the balls out of it but that's not the point ;))

vene Your picnic sounded great, mermaid on scooters :D The birthday also sounded really nice. did you get any further with business/the shop you were considering?

Ineed well done on the race, hope dh is ok, it takes time.

I wasn't supposed to stay too long so better be off now, sorry for the ones I missed!!

Hi all!

June, hi! Glad to hear C had a great time on Sunday. Oh, and so good to hear DH is seeing/has seen MIL and SIL's "true colours", that will help a lot when having to set boundaries. I also hope M's episode was a one-off; I spoke with the HV and she reassured me but suggested I took her to the GP and have her lungs/heart checked, just in case, so as to be sure it was just her being upset/cross and rule out any physical thing. How sad everything that happened with the French team in the world cup, I imagine the repercussions of the whole thing back home. I think I read Sarkozy had requested a meeting, heads will roll!

Mrsm, sorry to hear things are hard at the moment with the DC. M's a tornado, I can only imagine having her and another one! I second what Bigcar and Choccie said, make sure you have a little time for yourself, like the SATC outing

Bigcar, I was thinking of you today, hope things went well at the meeting.

Allsheep, tomorrow is the big busy day! Happy moving!

Strawberry, glad to hear the trip went well overall. I must have missed the part when you told us about your spine Be kind to yourself ((hug))

Snow, how are you? Hope MS has ceased now

Choccie, we're planning a meet-up for September, so there's still time

Llynn, oh no, poor little I. Hope it passes quickly. Tee's A had it a few weeks ago, IIRC, and it wasn't too bad for him, hope it's the same for I.

Hi to all Juners!

M has come down with a cold. Poor thing we were in a restaurant about to have lunch and she threw up all of her lunch I had to leave with her and go to a Boots for some emergency clothes shopping as she was soaked She seems ok now and has only BFd, I guess she doesn't feel like having any food.

Re. meet-up, June, if we plan it in advance (as we are) it's the same for us to do it on a weekday or weekend, as we'll have to travel anyway I guess DH would also come along if there's another DH there

Got to go now, M's very sleepy, early night for her, I guess.

Waves!

just a quicky, meet up wise, weekends are good for me! I can leave the other dcs at home with dh. I could do weekday but would be more organising re school run etc.

thanks for all the kind thoughts re dd3 and the meeting, it went reasonably well, will try to get 5 minutes to update soon

waves to all

Hello all.

MrsMcJnr - I second what everyone says about the 'terrible twos' - They are so hard to deal with as you can't reason with them and they go into melt-downs at the drop of a hat. I remember DS having one when he was about 2.3 and it was in an underground carpark. He was laying flat on the ground, face down, screaming his head off. It was echoing around all over the car-park and the amount of cat-bum-mouth looks and tuts as I just left him to it and stood there. The trouble is, they all say to ignore it, but it's bloody hard to ignore sometimes! DS is now 3.6 and it's soooo much easier to deal with as he can understand what's happening and you can explain things. He still has melt-downs when he's sent to 'Time Out' (the front room on a comfy chair, staring out of the window so hardly punishment - though from the sound of it, you'd imagine he was being tortured ) It will get easier, I promise.

June - good on you at the gym. You'll build your running time back up in no time, especially as you used to run before!

llynnn - Sorry to hear about the chicken pox. Neither of mine have had it, so in a way, I wish they'd get it out of the way while they're young.... oh well, I'm sure they'll get it when DS starts pre-school in September. Apparently, Eurax cream is great as it works better than calamine...

Allsheep - hope all went well with the move

choccie - sorry to hear that your neighbours didn't turn up to your party. That's so inconsiderate

strawberry - in my experience, there's never a right time to have a baby! If it feels right, then it's right. If you'll be too worried with DH's work / study and it would make you too anxious, then maybe you need to wait a bit. It's hard when you have time-ticking in your head though. Sorry, I know that doesn't help. It's just quite stressful having two, (although no more stressful than your first new-born, just a whole load of different stresses)

We had DS's first taster session at pre-school today and he loved it. The teacher stood and chatted to me for two hours . She was lovely and I feel so happy that he's there. It's a dinky little class - only 20 kids and 4 teachers so a really good ratio. He'll be going every afternoon from September 6th which will give me lots of quality time with DD..

Weekends or weekdays are good for me, I will have to arrange child-care for DS, though I've just realised it's quite easy to drive to Brent Cross for me, so that might be easier.... it's just I'll get more chatting done if I'm only chasing one child around

Enjoy the sunshine ladies xx

hi girls! I'm back.
Whirlwind trip to Oz, surprised my friend for her wedding, was wonderful, she had no idea and we arranged for her to come to the airport under the guise of meeting another friend!
A was on top form despite not sleeping at night during the 5 day stay.

We had a lovely birthday party for him in a local park before we left, great weather and lots of fun.All the cooking turned out really well and the cake was great!

Pregnancy ok, sporadic bleeds but baby looks good. MS coming and going. Was feral on the flight over with lots of vomiting but nothing on the way back which made the flight so much easier.

Great weather in oz and back to this glorious sun. we have swum twice this week. DH comes home today after a sailing trip. 2 weeks without him! A is missing him and we can't wait for him to get home.

Sounds like all the birthday parties have been going well. Can you believe they are one?Really brought it home when i was home and no one had seen A since he was 6 weeks old.

Right, need to catch up on the thread and sort out unpacking

Happy sunny weekend everyone!

hey snow glad you had a good time :D

meet-up update
We went to check out this topsy turvy place and you have to pay a membership to get in £10! so it's about £17 to get in basically .
We could still meet up in Brent cross and just go Wagamama?
Or I think we can find somewhere else for free like a park with swings where we could have a picnic?

There's a bigpark here just off palmers green tube station "Broomfield Park" which has a big pond with ducks and some nice swings. There must be other parks more central or easier access etc (this one for example does not have a cafe/pub).
I'll keep looking or parks.

Other London attractions that could be adequate if you'd like to make more of a day.
the london zoo is also quite expensive (just under £20 per adult, free for children under 3 it looks like).

the Aquarium is £16.20

Kew Gardens is supposed to be good and they have that "treetop" thing going on at the moment.(not sure how baby friendly it is?). That's £13.50

mmm, where do others mnetters meet up usually?

Hi all!

June, wowsers is London pricey! My word is it expensive to take out the DC there I love the picnic idea in a park with swings, but I guess it'd be subject to British weather I don't know my way around London well enough to suggest other places, let's see if other London dwellers have any other ideas

Snow, welcome back! Sounds like you had a lovely time at the wedding, such a great surprise for your friend! Sorry to hear about the MS on your way there Sounds like A's birthday party was really nice

Strawberry, sorry to hear about your spine. I can see why TTC is a topic for deep thought and somewhat hesitation. I guess no one but you and DH can really know what is best for you and the family you're building together((hug))

Ineed, E sounds like M. But glad to hear DS is on the chill side I can't imagine having two like M So glad to hear DS's pre-school is nice and you all liked it

Bigcar, hope E's feeling better.

Hi to all Juners!

I bought a book called "Toxic Parents" (didn't know it existed, saw a thread here about it the other day) mainly because DH's family issues are taking a toll on us. He really doesn't see certain things that are obvious and I end up feeling insane for pointing them out. I asked him if he'd read it and he agreed (I'm reading it first). This is emotionally draining and I need him/us to put a stop to it.

Sorry for the sad part of the post. Quiet week wrt work, I'm craving some now Hope something comes through this week.

M's cold is better, fortunately. She's been sleeping better(ish)

Waves!!!

On the meetup front, I can recommend the aquarium. There is a lovely little green / park next the London Eye, a lovely swing park next to it, it's 5 mins walk from Waterloo and the kids would love the aquarium...... Even if it's raining, the aquarium would be fab.....

thanks ineed I've never been there and always wanted to go so I'd be up for that.

There's also, changing of guards which happens at 11:30 every morning during the summer and right next to it is St James Park which has a playground. They also feed the pelicans a little further away, I don't know how big the park is.
You really couldn't tell I've been living in London for 10 years, could you?

Oh I know that one, June It's quite a big park, and it's really nice. The aquarium sounds fun, Ineed! Decisions decisions decisions

Late (and random) post here, but I need to vent a bit. I'm up reading the book - DH is still at work - and oh my God, ladies! How much poison, manipulation and control It makes me so angry to read (and confirm) that what I saw/feared/complained about was true and up to now I've been made to feel I'm "overreacting a bit"

Sorry, rant over!

oh gauchita, it sounds like this issue is hurting you quite a lot, I hope you get dh to see it from your point of view, it is hard isn't it. You kind of feel isolated and misunderstood and when you try and point out examples you're made to feel like you're nit picking. I feel for you and I wish I knew the answer.

At least some of my mates got to see my mil last weekend and how over the top she is. (she keeps getting my name wrong as well, I mean I know my name is fairly unusual but come on, we've been together 12 years now, everybody else seems to manage it!)

June, thanks. It's hard, isn't it? This book is so clear and what it describes is so straight-forward that I hope DH can see it after reading it. Reading it has given me some reassurance, to be honest, I was not nit picking, I was not overreacting, I was seeing things as they were.

Glad to hear your friends could see it first hand. Mine do too, they would always come and tell me "she's insane!". I can't believe your MIL says your name wrong after so many years

Hi all

Gauchita - sorry you are having a tough time, sounds like you are taking steps to try to fix it though and hopefully dh will really see the problems too after reading the book. good luck x

snow - pleased you had a fab time and hope you are enjoying having your dh back! I look at Isobel everyday and think you can't possibly be 1 already!! she still feels like my tiny baby (may be she always will!)

strawberry - sorry to hear about your condition how awful for you. can understand how hard it must be to decide what to do next....really tough one xx

Ineed - pleased your taster session at school went so well. We have dd1's on thursday, I'm sort of looking forward to it! hope dd1 likes it there, she hasnt been at the nursery there so will be straight in at the deep end in Sept - eek!

June - pleased the party went well (despite the in laws!)

Bigcar - pleased your dd's meeting went well

So, I doesnt have chicken pox after all! the spots have vanished!! they never blistered or scabbed, just faded and disapeared!! very strange! the pharmacist thinks it was probably to do with teething (that always gets the blame for everything ) She is struggling with the heat at the minute though, just lolling on me, not interested in playing at all I really love the heat but hope it cools down for Isobel's sake!

Hi to everyone I've missed (sorry)

hello ladies

not really sure where the time is vanishing off to at the moment! E is really not liking this hot weather, he's getting so sweaty, all his hair is stuck to his head. He's having his blood test tomorrow, not looking forward to that. It's a good job dd3 is off to the farm with nursery for the day otherwise I'd have to take her along too. Dh is still off, back to work on friday [yay]

I went to see Derek Acorah last week with a couple of friends. I don't want to offend anyone that believes in that kind of thing, but as a total sceptic, it really was funny, a good evening out!

gauchita, I hope that book is as helpful as it is upsetting, hopefully dh will see the same things.

june, at your mil who can't get your name right, maybe gauchita can lend you her book!

llynnnn, good to hear it wasn't chicken pox, could it have been an allergic reaction?

snow, how do you do it one busy lady, how lovely to surprise your friend!

ineed, good to hear the preschool visit went well

meetup wise, has anyone been here, walked past it a couple of times but never been in. Maybe more of an august thing than september though.

That looks really good bigcar I'd never heard of it!
It's probably better I don't start on DA and the likes , it gets me angry how some of them regularly take advantage of my vulnerable mil and are at the root of her behaviour and problems. They're the ones who told her to cut the ties off with her children, supposedly something "her dead mother advised her to do", such bullshit, my dh was his grandmother's absolute favorite, we went to see her every week and knew her very well and she would never never have said anything like that.

Glad you had a good night out though ;)

Good luck with the blood tests today!

Have your littles ones had their 1yo jabs yet? I think I may have to contact the surgery as they have not been in touch yet.

lynn How weird it wasn't chicken pox after all. C has little spots at the back of her shoulders and top of the back, definitely a heat rash.
Good lukc witht he taster session on Thursday!

I have a question for you, what do you do when people invite you over for dinner with the children? Do you take a cot to put them to bed or just leave (stupidly) early? C goes to bed around 7 or 7:30 nowadays. We still go out to restaurants sometimes, we just go there as soon as they open at 6pm.
Friends of ours invited us for dinner, I suggested weekend lunch instead but it's not as easy for them to organise.

Hi all!

Bigcar, don't know who he is but I'll google him, glad to hear you had a good laugh anyway Yay on DH going back to work Hope his arm is all better now. Good luck today with E's bloods. Any improvement with DD3's school after the meeting last week? That place looks great, I guess as long as the place we choose has a "covered" area - in case the weather doesn't feel like helping much that day - we'll be fine

Llynn, how odd! But glad to hear it was just a rash after all. Ohhh I agree, every single thing is blamed on teething If they have a runny nose, a runny bottom, temperature, no appetite, bad nights, and the list goes on!

June, we got a letter from the surgery a few days before M's birthday telling us to call and book an appt with them for the first two. She was supposed to have it yesterday but we had to rebook it due to her cold. It's on 14th July now.

Wrt invitations from friends, it's a tricky one. M used to be able to go out and fall asleep anywhere. These days she just stays awake but then fights to go down when we get home Or she falls asleep in the car and takes it as nap, then comes home and is full of beans! So I'll be reading with interest if other Juners have better ideas

Allsheep, hope the move on Friday had gone smoothly

Hi to all Juners!

Thank you all for your kind words these last few days. I've nearly finished with the book now. I must say although it's quite reassuring to read that you were right and not just imagining things it's still an emotional roller-coaster. The good thing is it also gives you ways to deal with the issue and "free" yourself from the emotional burden and controlling situations. Fingers crossed it'll help

We're off to nursery in a bit, it's M's last adaptation day, tomorrow she's supposed to start, although the way I see things are going I don't think she'll be able to stay from 1 to 6pm tomorrow. Maybe we'll have to leave her just a couple of hours. We'll see what they say today.

Hope you're having a nice day, ladies. With lots of sunshine!

Waves!

June - we never take the dd's with us on evenings out. We are lucky to have my parents local and willing to baby sit. I've always found the girls very difficult to settle if their bedtime routine is altered in any way! Also, I find it so lovely having an evening out with friends without having to entertain/worry about the dd's! sorry, this isnt very helpful to your problem

Well, I has been hard work today!! She is getting so so clingy to me, everytime I put her down on the floor to play/cook tea/nip to the loo etc she screams, follows me and pulls at my leg to be picked up again! Also when I do have hold of her she scratches and pinches my face and neck!! she really hurts too! Is my darling little baby the only one to have turned into a bit of a madam!!?? I've forgotten how we are 'supposed' to handle this? I try distracting her when I have to put her down and I do say no to her when she scratches or hits etc but she just cries and does it again! what am I doing wrong!! (or maybe its all linked to teething??!!)

Gauchita - hope nursery goes well for M tomorrow and she soon settles in

bigcar - hope E's blood test's went well

Hi to everyone else!

Hello ladies, It's been a long time and I hope you vaguely remember me.....

Have been off Mumsnet for a few months as RL started taking it's toll (or more truthfully working nights everyweek). Came back today for some advice but I'll bore you with that another time.

Hope all your LO's had/ are having lovely birthday's we didn't do to much for A we had a family day out to the Zoo (we did something similar for the other 2). She is turning into a little madam with a wicked sense of humour. We've also decided she going to be an England international rugby player as she can take down her big sisters easily. She toddles up arms round their waist and they all topple over cue A giggling and shouts from which ever big sister!

I am loving the fact that she is a bit more mobile now and she'll occupy herself chasing the other 2dd's although I hasn't noticably given me more time to do stuff. (Giving up work has helped tho')

Right I promised myself an early -ish night tonight so off to bed I go, I'll try and see how you're all doing in a couple of days (those who are on my FB I do read that still (initials SG)

hey Doris! Good to speak to you again :D
How are you doing? We were talking about you the other day wondering how you were!
We've all been celebrating our little one's bdays.
sam happy birthday for tomorrow by the way ;)
Doris are you anywhere near-ish london? We're trying to organise a meet up end of august/ beginning of september.

I feel like this week is really dragging on, it's been really packed with stuff to do.
I've been going to the gym any time I can fit it in for three weeks now and signed up for personal training, second session tomorrow and after that twice a week (going as soon as I drop C off to nursery.) so I feel back on track now.

better be off to prepare bags for tomorrow.

take care juners

hi girls, busy with work here. Tis good to be using my brain again. A started officially at nursery, going two mornings. He loves it, although the toys he has been given to play with are not age appropriate- rattles and soft books? This boy loves blocks, cars, trolleys, stacking cups, shape sorters etc. Not sure if i am being a bit PFB about. Have told them what he likes to play with but still no sign of any of those toys. Will try again next week.

june Meet up sounds good. London easy for us. Great progress on your fitness mission! As to nights out, if with friends, A sleeps in the buggy. If dinner at a restaurant, we go early and tend to be home 730/8pm ish.
doris lovely to see you back. Sounds v fun and hectic with your brood.
llynnnn A has whinging days like that too. I usually put him in the sling so I can get stuff done.
gauchita sorry that reading the book has been so difficult. At least you know you are not imagining things and might get some strategies to deal with them. M's first day at nursery today? Good luck!
bigcar how did E's blood test go? The field looks like a lovely place for a meet up
ineed The pre-school sounds wonderful! Big pat on the back for you and the race!Well done, great achievement. Aquarium looks lovely too.
Strawbs how are things?tough decision about TTC. We hadn't planned as such, just thought we would start trying again and see what happens. Not ideal as DH needing to find a new job in the new year and a move somewhere else in the country likely as a part of that (probably with a new born/not born!!) but hey, you never know what is going to happen and after the loss of DS1, we know the best plans can go astray. Hope you come to a decision soon.
allsheep hope the move went well
choccie sounds like you are looking and feeling great! Fantastic. Hope the neighbours are behaving.
mrsmc thinking of you. any improvements in A's sleeping??

Right, must go start some work. Hope you all ok.

Hi all!

Snow, glad to hear work is going well and that A is loving his nursery LOL at them giving him rattles! Keep sending hints, hopefully they'll get it soon

Llynnn, I was wondering the same the other day. M sometimes throws what can only be called a baby tantrum, and I thought they came a bit later I've also tried removing her, distraction, etc but when she wants something, she'll just go for it. Any tips welcome!!

June, glad to hear you're getting time for yourself Are you doing any classes at the gym? or just running + weights?

Doris, hi! Nice to hear from you LOL at A "tackling" her sisters rugby style

Hi to all Juners!

Quick question, I've tried googling this but somehow some of the info is contradictory Can anyone explain me how the school system works? What's the difference between grammar, state, public, independent schools? Which of those have fees?

M's day at nursery was quite good. She didn't stay for the full 5 hours, only 2. She cried a lot when I left but apparently she settled well after a little while, played, had a snack and even laughed! They asked me to take her again tomorrow for an hour, so we'll see how she goes

Waves!!

afternoon all

Gauchita, can see why you're confused! As a general rule, grammar and state schools are free, public, private and independent schools you pay for. Look at your local council website, they should list all the schools that come under their control and are free. There is also usually a FAQ type thing that you'll find useful. You don't need to worry about grammar schools yet as M won't be old enough until she's 11. Generally you'll be looking for infant or primary schools for now.

At the moment M goes to a private nursery that you pay for completely. The term after she is 3, so the following september, she will be entitled to 15 hours a week free nursery education. So you can keep her where she is and use the hours free and pay for any extras. Or she could go to a nursery attached to a school and just do the 15 hours, split either as 5 mornings or 5 afternoons (depending on when they have space for her). Depends on what your childcare requirements are. The september before she is 5 (or possibly the january depending on your local authority) she will go into school, whether you choose state or private. She becomes compulsory school age the term after she is 5, so again that's the september. Sorry if I'm repeating stuff you already know

good on M doing 2 hours, hope she's ok today

snow, you're not being pfb, E doesn't play with rattles any more either! Keep on at them, different children get to different stages at different times and they should adjust to that. Glad he likes it there

june, that's impressive, hope you have fun getting back in your routine

doris, of course we remember you good to hear A is doing well

llynnn, E does the slapping and pinching too, he thinks its funny. Ignore, ignore, ignore is my strategy, he just gets put down each time and it's slowly getting better.

E's blood test went well, thankfully over very quickly and only screamed for a few seconds. I think we're both glad it's over and done with! E gets his heart set on doing something and that's it, the second the stairgate is open he's off heading straight for it and the same when he wants something. He thinks no is funny, he shakes his head back at me and laughs, it's so hard to keep looking stern

Bigcar, thank you! I'm off to M's school right now so I'll read it properly when I come back. Oh, and thanks for the tips re. baby attitude You're right, it's so hard to keep a straight face when they do such things! M comes near my laptop, looks at me and slams her open hand over the keyboard, serious face and all Just to see my reaction I guess. I want to burst with laughter but at the same time I can't believe her nerve Not looking forward to the terrible twos TBH

Back later! Waves to all!