December 2009: for the sake of Auld Lang Sine

[LaDiDaDi]

Just thought that I would get this started before the ante-natal thread gets filled up, not that I've had much time to post since I had DS but others might be able to multi-task better than I can!

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Just been catching up on this thread. Very jealous of all these sleeping babies. DS isn't very happy going down in the evening yet so spend all evening trying to settle him. Once he's down I'll wake him when we go to bed and he'll wake again around 3/3:30 then go till the morning. I'd thought that was about average (6 wks today) but lots of you seem to be doing better. He does nap a lot in the morning which may be the problem. Just woken now so better go....

Hi girls, just had a quick read through as haven't been on for a while.

Jasmine's doing well, gaining weight nicely, she feeds every 2-3 hrs but every 3-4 during the night which is ok as the times work out with DS.

DS is really playing up the last couple of weeks, he's 2y 6m. At the end of tumbletots (play group) every tues morning all the kids get a sticker. L now thinks that everything is a sticker even his nice books and puzzles so he picks away at the corners of pages and puzzles and rips the pictures off and has ruined some of his lovely xmas presents. Also if I'm feeding and DP is sitting down watching tele / cooking etc then DS will throw something but when it comes to putting him on the naughty step he likes it and thinks its funny! We don't say anything we just take him out to the step and make sure there's no distractions around him but he ends up laying down or rolling around and actually enjoys it. We had a roast dinner at my mum's on sunday and when we took his dinner away cos he was throwing peas at us he grabbed a small half-full glass of fruit juice and threw it across the table and then refused to sit on the step as my mums stairs are opposite the dining table so he could see us.

Help!! What should I do??

mybox - know what you mean about the school run. It's hard work getting ds1 ready & to school on time on no sleep. Then it seems to be time to pick him up again as soon as I've got home.

My parents arrive tomorrow fo a week. It's the first time they'll have seen ds2. We haven't told ds1 so can't wait to see his face when they collect him from school tomorrow.

Hi All,

Not had much time to post but lurking nd reassured you're going through what I'm going through - i.e. DS1 playing up (not sleeping, language has gone back to baby talk) dog tired with night feeds, the whole nine yards .

Im also struggling with getting to the school for 9am, especially last week with all that snow to contend with aswell!
Im trying to make it easier by having...

clothes ironed and ready to put on.
Lunch packed the night before.
bag packed the night before and both lunch and bag on the table next to the door ready to grab.
Also having DS's shoes, hat and gloves ready the night before is a godsend because it saves all the last minute "have you got you hat? wheres your gloves? Well go and find them!" type conversations!
And ;last but not least One huge giant cup of coffee ready to be guzzled when I wake up!

I'm just about getting dd to nursery on time but it is sooo stressful! Can't imagine what it's like with a school age child where it actually matters if they are there on time.

Feeling irritated by my mum today. I know that she tries to help but she really thinks that her way is the only way iyswim, if you want to do something that she diasgrees with then you just get cats bum for a mouth faces and strong sense of disapproval. She wanted to have dd for me tomorrow afternoon and this would have been a break for me but when I asked dd she didn't want to go. Mum clearly not pleased about this (not seeing dd) but I'm not about to push dd off if she doesn't want to go.

ABF - I do the same with school stuff but get caught out by show & tell which is something different every week & keep forgetting to send ds1 with his library book on the correct morning which means he doesn't get another book for the next week & I'm at the mercy of all the alpha mummies who never forget a damn thing & provide something home made for every show & tell. I'm more slummy than yummy mummy it has to be said. ds2 usually goes in his pram still in his grobag for the morning school run with a dummy in his mouth as I can't manage to get him fed until I get back home.

LaDiDaDi - you'd think your mum would realize that the last thing you need is disapproval. As if it's not hard enough managing with a new baby.

Sorry but that did make me laugh... "cats bum for a mouth faces"

I'm probably being a bit mean as she would do anything if I asked her to, but everything has to be done her way. Sometimes it makes me want to rebel even when I know that she is being sensible! I suspect that half of the problem is that mentally I'm still fighting battles with her from when I was a teenager.

On a brighter note I've had a lovely bathtime and beditime with dd, ds slept through it all and dp isn't home yet, but she was really good for mummy and looked so cute all sleepy and cuddly in her pjs. She did ask if she could suck my booby to see if she could get milk out but I told her that only babies could do that though she could still have special cuddles next to the booby. Not sure if I handled that ok or not tbh. I only bf dd til she was 5 months and most of that was mixed feeding. Bf seems to be going much better with ds so might well feed him for quite a bit longer so he won't necessarily be a "baby" iyswim. Anyone else who is not tandem feeding had an older sib want to try to bf?

Oh, meant to say a big welcome back to Scorps, though very of all that sleep!

Been reading the thread for the last couple of weeks but not posted much. DD2 (now just over 3 wks) seems pretty good at sleeping during the night, but does not sleep during the day. It may seem odd to complain, esp as she sleeps 4pm - 8am waking only for 2 feeds, but as I have DD1(3yrs) at home, I need DD2 to nap during the day giving me one to one time with her. DD2 just screams though, only content when jiggled in my arms. Even today I finally managed, thanks to the weather, to walk into town with the 2 of them but DD2 cried for the first 10mins despite being in the pram, and started up again the moment I stopped walking. Any advice? Is it too early to start trying to put DD2 down for naps in her cot? She's currently in her moses basket in the lounge during the day.
LaDiDaDi- I know what you mean re your mum. Mine's the same!

i have come to the conclusion that babies change daily at this age...what ds was doing last week he is not doing this week etc he screamed the house down for no apparent reason tonight and last night slept a whole 7 hours.... but prob wont again. I bf ds in a cafe today which i felt good about an dthen he bloody threw up on me while i had him over my shoulder but with my boob still out so got in a pickle!!! Feeling tearful...... is anyone else!???

biscuits I am putting DS2 in his cot during the day for naps if I am not planning on shopping or if it is close to the school run. I have found he sleeps a lot better up there as it is quieter and I dont feel the need to run and check on him if he stirs. I just put the monitor on and only check on him if I think he is proper crying, I leave him for a few mins if it is just fussing and 9 times out of 10 he will go back to sleep on his own.
If im going out I will put him in car seat or pram. I think its good to get them used to sleeping anywhere just in case.

All the best to all those going out to school/childcare - it is hard work.

Claire bet your ds will be really happy with his school surprise.

Here I was told by one mum at school that I looked awful (thanks alot) & by another that I looked just fine. Don't you just hate the comments people make!

sparkly - I have days where I feel really tearful & others when I'm totally fine. Usually sleep deprivation is responsible for the tearful days

ds2 tends to sleep in his pram during the day & in his cot at night. When we can get him to sleep that is

Lee36 milk duck has gone again (for now). i used hot compress before every feed. Ebony fed every hour yesterday so i think that helped. Thanks i might try that next time. GP said it was probably because i have a lot of milk and also gave me some things to try. she was really good she also told me about kellymom website.

Millimuffin i have no idea but if he likes the step i wouldnt use it. unless he is using it for the opportunity to calm down. My dd1 2y 4mo always thought the step is a game so i stopped. Now i tend to sit her on my lap and hold her arms and tell her mummy will let her go when she listens to me. It usually only takes her a couple of mins and then she will listen so i can explain what she has done wrong and ask if she is going to do it again. Obviously ifshe says yes i dont let her down.This seems to work for now but i imagine it will be harder as she gets bigger.Have you got a small box of activities you only get out at times when your feeding to occupy him, i have in mine is, small jigsaw she can do unaided, pot of playdough, threading bobbins, magic paint set (water ones), stickers and paper. I also only let her watch something special (she loves it) at these times). I read about doing this somewhere and it has been a godsend to me as i seem to be feeding all day. Also she loves getting in my bed and watching telly so sometimes i feed in there.

For any of you that are bf, do you give ebm in a bottle. I was until yesterday when Ebony refused to take it. I really need her to though any suggestions. Could it be because she was going through a growth spurt and it just didnt measure up?

I've given some ebm from a bottle, three or four times now, as I want to be able to leave my ds with dp or gps. He's taken it fine so far but he's not had it for a few days as I can't pump enough to build up a store for when I want to leave him, Fri evening, and to give him some each day iyswim. I'm getting 50-60 mls out at a time though probably got more like 70 last night.

My DS (aged 4) is great with DS2, but his behaviour certainly leaves a lot to be desired at the moment, i suppose there is an element of jealousy there, but it is directed at us and not his brother.

I take DS1 to nursery with DS2 still in his sleepsuit with his snowsuit over the top, its the only way i can make it to nursery at a reasonable time, DH leaves the house for work at 5am, so its just me and the boys.

Really at babies who are sleeping five or more hours during feeds, Ellis isnt doing too bad, but still waking every 3-31/2hrs during night for a feed, hes taking 5oz now and having approx 8 feeds in 24 hours, it would be nice to have a bit more sleep

Ive put couple more pics on profile of him.

My DS is the same annie. He adores his sister and directs all of his rage at us.

He got up at 3.30am last night and crawled into our bed. He fell asleep and all was fine until 5am when Catherine woke up for a feed. He got very angry at her intruding on his sleep with Mummy and Daddy and started hitting my hand away if I tried to touch him. He wouldn't go back to sleep after that and has been tired all day.

I tried really hard with him. Took him down to the local toddler group like we would normally do and he had fun but was throwing toys and generally being embarrassing. If I tried to talk to him, he just ignored me and I kept having to go to him to get him to listen to me. Then on the way home, he kept running off and at one point decided to dawdle in the middle of the road. I went back and grabbed his arm and he just sat down!! We got home and I put the TV on to distract him and he fell asleep on the sofa so e must have been tired! At least he stayed clean and dry all day.

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm getting a bit depressed. I honestly feel today like I've ruined everything by having a second baby. We were so happy and everything feels so hard and out of control at the moment

Tom is also quite good with Erin, although he is obsessed with touching her face and head. Yesterday I had left Erin on changemat on bed to goto kitchen (less than 10 metres away) and next I hear Erin crying and catch Tom running out of the room. Go in the bedroom and shes on the floor! Tom won't say how she ended up there, but it's 99.9% certain he had something to do with it. She's ok thankfully. I have a feeling he may have tried picking her up.

Ebony will take the bottle of ebm again! how strange.

Re getting up and about for the school run, i dont have one to do but am still finding it quite difficult to be out for 9am when some of DD's groups start. I find though if i get up when dh goes to work 6.30, i can get sorted out and wake ebony for a feed, hopefully DD1 will stay asleep until about 8 so when she gets up ebony usually back down for a sleep and sttled. its still a mad rush though. I also have pre packed change, nappy etc.. bag in the car which never comes out apart from to be stocked up so thats always ready.

DD1 has decided to start toilet training was that fed up of taking her nappy off to use the toilet i have now gone for it at home with knickers, however when out i have got pull ups. I wish she could of waited another couple of months.

GS - I sometimes feel that way about ds2. Before I got pregnant everything was so much better. I was concerned about PND but having got a bit more sleep I feel better than I did. It is much harder than I anticipated though.

I'm finding some things easier, I had anticipated dd hating ds but she loves him, but other things are clearly going to be very hard, like leaving the house alone with them to go to the shops.
So far I feel hindered by the weather more than anything, can't just go in the garden or to the park to let dd run around and burn off some energy for example.

Think we might resort to Mary Poppins this afternoon!