April 2009 - Chapter 1: We're not pregnant, just fat!

[PuzzleRocks]

We made it!

The fab April ladies and their blessed progeny...

12 Feb: Skiingone: MARIANNA 4lb 4oz
20 Feb: Glaskham: RUBY MARIE 4lb 3oz
04 Mar: Barbarella: ESTELLA, ROSANNA, OTIS
05 Mar: Kazkiss: ISABELLE FLORENCE 4lb 6oz & OLIVER THOMAS 3lb 7oz
15 Mar: Babypringle: OSCAR WILLIAM 7lb 2oz
28 Mar: Claireykitten: VIOLET ROSE 7lb 9oz
29 Mar: WhatFreshHell: FELIX DEVLIN ALEXANDER 10lb 5.5oz
31 Mar: Mumblemum: ORSON XERXES
02 Apr: Oddeyes: ELEANOR 9lb 8oz
03 Apr: Bleuravin: MEGAN LILLIAN CONSTANCE
03 Apr: Bumpalump: JACOB 8lb
04 Apr: BabyBolat: KARAHAN 6lb 5oz
05 Apr: Mrsfossil: ISLA LILIAN 7lb 10oz
06 Apr: BoffinMum: FELIX DAVID GORDON 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: SpringySunshine: GEORGE NATHAN 8lb 15oz
11 Apr: RachelinScotland: CLEMENT JAMES 8lb 14oz
11 Apr: Lou031205: ISLA SOPHIA 7lb 9oz
11 Apr: Electra: ISABELLA CAROLINE 6lb 3oz
11 Apr: AuldAlliance: ALEXANDRE 7lb 6oz
12 Apr: Phdlife: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 3oz
12 Apr: BethDivine: Name TBA GIRL 9lb 9oz
13 Apr: MathsMummy27: AMELIA CHARLOTTE
14 Apr: Purlease: ADAM 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Juwesm: HUGO GEORGE 9lb 2oz
15 Apr: Bronze: ISAAC JOHN
15 Apr: HeidiT: HEIDI
15 Apr: Kalikaroo: Name TBA BOY 8lb
15 Apr: Minush: ZAFIRAH ROSA 7lb 12oz
15 Apr: FatandFedup: EMILIA ROSE 7lb 6oz
16 Apr: PuzzleRocks: HOLLY ELIZABETH 8lb
16 Apr: Brettgirl: HANNAH GRACE 6lb 15oz
16 Apr: ReallyTired: Name TBA GIRL
18 Apr: Staryeyed: Name TBA BOY 7lb 11oz
20 Apr: LuLuBai: SEBASTIAN 9lb
20 Apr: Swaliswan: BETH 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Kittycatisgettingfat: GABRIELLA AUDREY BIANCA
21 Apr: B52s: SAM MARTIN 7lb 9oz
21 Apr: Schulte: HAZEL LOIS 7lb 9 oz
23 Apr: Tristaleejac: LEWIN 8lb 4oz
23 Apr: NuttyTaff: TIAHNA SKYE 8lb 8oz
23 Apr: Purplemonkeydishwasher: ISLA ELIZABETH 8lb 14oz
24 Apr: Soon2befamilyof4: TALIA 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Carameli: THEO LAURENCE 7lb 6oz
26 Apr: Surprisenumber3: EVIE ANNE 8lb 2oz
26 Apr: Bicnod: OSCAR MATTHEW 8lb 1oz
27 Apr: Lauren61: OLIVER STEPHEN 7lb 7oz
27 Apr: Gingersarah: VERONICA ROISIN 9lb 1oz
30 Apr: MegBusset: ARCHIE 8lb 15oz
01 May: Satheresitting: Name TBA BOY
03 May: Conkertree: Name TBA BOY 8lbs 8oz
06 May: Frekkles: HARRIS MERLIN 8lb 5.5oz
07 May: TarteTatin: ALBERT JOHN
10 May: Ilovesummer: Name TBA BOY

Looby, nipples heal surprisingly quickly when they are not thrushy or something - have you checked? Might be because of all your antibios - they make you susceptible to yeast & fungi etc. Good luck if you have to go back to the dr - hope not!

Hi minush! Sounds tough if your man can't change a nappy.
Is he panicking? I used to panic when V cried. Now I still do for certain kinds of cry or when it feels like it will never end, but it doesn't spin me into a panic all the time like it used to - sounds like he needs to be desensitised on the job!

So, re FANJO PHYSIO:
had my 6 week check up with my consultant - (DH, who made the appointment - forgot to tell me that he'd got me a private appt as there weren't any public appts available for ages and I had to pay 80 bloody euros as he is, apparently, one of the leading ob/gyns in Marseille ) my 80 euros got me: a 2 minute (if that) examination, a recommendation to have more kiddies ASAP as I'm old , 32 isn't that old, surely? a chat about what he considers to be the lamentable state of English instruction in France and a prescription for 10 sessions of re-education for my perineum; He explained that the purpose was to avoid future probs like incontinence and prolapse, no mention of pleasing the hubby! So perhps the Daily Mail journo just got a misogynistic doc ?
Haven't had first session yet as am still looking for a doc. who isn't ridiculously expensive. But will report back.

Ginger: Yep he's panicking! When we first got her home from hospital he was FAR worse and wanted to call an ambulance every time she cried.
He is getting better though and I'm working on desensitisation.
He has actually cooked dinner for me TWICE since DD born. If you knew my DH you would be reaching for the smelling salts right now; AND it turns out he's not a bad cook!
He may sound like a bit of a caveman and sometimes I want to boot him up the arse, but he is good in loads of other ways (I'm feeling kindly towards him today!)

Minush,
Do you live near me???? I knew you were in the South, but if you are seeing Marseillais ob/gyns, you must be closer than I thought.
32 is NOT old.
Glad to hear that the perineal physio wasn't being touted to you as a way to keep your hubby happy. Maybe the angle taken by that "journalist" was something to do with the article having been in the Daily Mail? If this is anything to go by, they are ever so slightly incendiary towards the French!

Ginger, it may have been cathartic merely writing my depressed post about my relationship. Maybe a subconscious act that the post got wiped, as I am not very big on airing my marital woes online.

Who is BW??

Alex has now been asleep for nearly 3 hrs (not in the garage all that time, I had to go and get DS1, and then I lugged Alex upstairs). He's not fed since 6am (it is now 12:09)!!!!!!!!
Could it be post-traumatic stress after last night, or the relaxed serenity induced by the osteopathy?

Bronze, you are supposed to pay someone to walk them from school probably - a lot of what she says makes a lot of sense when you see it in the context of her making a living helping people who can afford help

I was going to suggest she did it for me but shes dead isnt she

Hi Minush, nice to see you! Like your cunning Monoprix plan. HOW on earth do you all express so much milk though? I tried this morning and got a whopping - wait for it - half ounce! I really can't do it unless I have a baby attached to the other breast at the same time. Not letdown reflex whatsoever. It's like my boobs dry up at the sight of the pump!

Had a decent night for a change... H fed at 9pm, 1.30 and 4.30 then slept until 6.30. She did need a bit of settling after the feeds but nowhere near as much as the night before. I have discovered that putting her in her cot and rubbing her belly in circular motions can work - well it worked once, so fingers crossed.

Who laughed at me for saying a few months ago that I wouldn't bother changing nappies at night? Well I don't! (Unless there is a poo in there) They are absolutely soaked in the morning but it means we have fewer disruptions. And I am sure I am not the only one here

Auld, has Alex woken up yet? Maybe he thinks it's nighttime?

BW is the baby whisperer. I have a shortened version her that came free with a mother & baby magazine. Her description of the cries and what they mean don't make any sense to me (or H, for that matter). H will not stay awake after each feed like she's supposed to. And I haven't even bothered with the baby 'personalities'. Like with every other baby routine book, I'd say there are a few good points in there (yes, I even learned some useful stuff from Her Who Must Not Be Named) but textbook babies simply don't exist. When I tried to do a bit of textbook routine last time I just got frustrated because DD1 wouldn't follow the theory. So I'd say Ginger don't worry too much, just take the advice that suits you and forget about the rest.

Boff, hooray for AP leaving

Auld, hope you and DH can sort things out between you. You sure it's not just the stress of having a new baby around? xxx

Have managed to acquire cup of tea and packet of HobNobs. Have a feeling this will be my only sustenance until DH gets home as H is in a particularly difficult mood today.

I intended to do some expressing this morning, but the Milk Monster rendered that plan unfeasible. At my first real attempt I too managed half an ounce, Schultes, so you're not alone! DH is desperate to do some feeds. He feels like H cries whenever he holds him. It's not true at all, but obviously a quick bit of boob is the easiest way to settle him, so it seems like he's quiet with me and crying with Daddy. Does everybody sterilise their pumps, or just a hot soapy wash?

Auld - I really want one of those cushions you linked to for me a while back! DH thinks that £80 for a cushion is a bit excessive though (inclined to agree ).

Boff, I know we're not to ask, and I know you have your mind on higher matters (nappies, burps, etc.) but I have to know more about that documentary that involved filming your loo. Please???

Alex is still sleeping. Maybe I should drag out my pump, wash it off, etc., and empty my bursting udders. Have to get DS1 back to school in 30 mins...
I bl**dy hope Alex doesn't think it's nighttime, as that would mean he'll think tonight is daytime and playtime.

Schulte, I'll join your club: my name is Auld and my baby has now been wearing the same nappy for about five and a half hours.

Not sure it's just the new baby stress; our whole lives are fraught and we seem to have nothing to talk about any more. Yesterday when he came home I asked him for news of the outside world, and he went on for 10 mins about the intricate legal details of the case he is working on. I felt dim-witted because I couldn't understand it and dull because I couldn't see why anyone might think it was an interesting to discuss.

If I am brutally honest, I am finding it hard not to be resentful that I have been supporting the whole family for the last 5 or more years (and screwing my career in the process, as my research has fallen by the wayside) so as to enable DH to change careers and do a job which provides shit pay and means he's hardly ever around, makes him tense and irritable when he is around, and which involves him having a w*nker boss who can't decide whether to sack him or not, so that our agreement for me to take parental leave for 3 months has had to be shelved.

I know he thinks I am negative and pessimistic, but I am having a hard time seeing the sunny side of things.

I have to be the breadwinner, housekeeper, cook, childminder, shopper & laundrymaid all rolled into one. I'm just not up to doing it all, AND to being chirpy and go-getting all the time. The problem with this stage in parenthood is that one spends too much time BFing, sitting around mulling over one's rankling discontent.

Ju, it is indeed extortionate.

I hasten to declare that I didn't buy one. Our neighbour asked for one for her "birth" gift from her folks and has been lending it to new mothers ever since.
Alex is awake! I have 20 mins to feed him before rushing DS1 to school.

Auld. It always suprises me how much mileage the DM STILL gets from the whole 'ungrateful, cowardly, collaborating, sheep-burning adulterous frogs' line. Other subjects of Daily Mail rage and ranting I can understand strike a chord with loads of Brits, but French bashing just seems such old hat.
Although, I can well imagine Sarkozy wetting himself so much over a big photo op with Obama that he didn't bother with anything else.
I am actually, and unfortunatley, in that big town we both love so much! Right in the centre, about 2 minutes from Gare St Charles, so it's pretty nosiy. For various complicated and tedious reasons, we can't leave right now, even though we both find it, and a lot of it's inhabitants, disagreeable. Although as soon as DDs passport comes through, me and her are escaping to London for an extended holiday soon.
Schulte: glad you had a better night

Auld, sorry to hear that - but sometimes you have to take notice of your feelings, rather than sweeping them under the carpet. Maybe something as simple as one responsibility he has to take care of in the house would make you feel better - or some sense that he knows how hard it really is. But it sounds like it is hard to talk at the moment.

Looby, I would not be surprised if there is thrush there, given all your Antibs - I think sometimes you can't see it but if it's very very painful could be contributing.

Boff, glad to hear the cleaner is helpful.

Auld, that is very frustrating and upsetting about your DH's care of Alex. I would be so cross.

WFH, yes, we're fine thanks. We were very tired. It's not really the kind of thing that has a solution (not really an argument either, just an anguished discussion about future plans for our family. He didn't realise how sad I was, and in the process of discovering how I felt, managed to say lots of tactless, depressing things. It is really hard for us, as I think any pregnancy and birth is going to reawaken feelings surrounding DD and that really can't be helped.) Anyway, yes, I seem to be still standing - got four hours sleep in the end, by dint of co-sleeping [guilt] which is pretty standard for me at the moment so all is okay.

Can someone call mummy services, I am being beaten by my child - he has not only left me covered in sick, poo and wee for the past few hours but has just head butted me and split my lip - If i did that to him, they would take him away from me wouldn't they - gah the injustice of being a mum!! hee hee!

What what what!? There is a due Feb 2010 thread!? It seems like yesterday that I found out I was pregnant? And now people are already growing spring 2010 babies!

Ginger,
I asked if I could count on him to take out the rubbish, which needs to be carried about 300m to the big communal bins, tricky with a pushchair and DS1 to supervise. And I don't like leaving the kids alone in the house to go to the bins in the evening.
He said "of course" and has never done it.
Talking is impossible just now, and I am currently prone to dissolving in wimpish tears which doesn't help. Hormones and exhaustion.
I've kind of decided to try and hang on for grim death till we are over the worst of the new baby stage, and talk thereafter.

MrsG, you have been through so much. I feel cr*p moaning about my woes. No guilt over co-sleeping is allowed. It's like not changing nappies at night unless absolutely vital: everyone does it sometimes, even if they won't admit it.

Schulte,
Scary, isn't it???
Alex fed, went an hour and fed again, and has been asleep in the sling for almost 2hrs.

mrsg we co-sleep all the time - k just coo'd down the phone to DH for 1omins - I have a very happy husband

Auld i think you are doing the right thing to let this period pass but dont bottle it up - if you cant speak to him we're here!!

omw feb 2010 - technically we could be on that thread!! if any of us were brave / crazy enough!!!

I think crazy is the word you're looking for BB

Am v excited because DD1's bright green Crocs have arrived. Can't wait to see her face when she gets home! Summer holiday here we come!

My child just sleeps... off to research options for our skiing holiday in March. Yay!

We're booking our flights tonight (I hope) or next MOnday (never ever at the weekend as flights go up in price) for 22 days in the sun! Hate to think how much catching up I will have to do after that - thank the lord we are not all still in antenatal!!!

Where are you going BB?

To Turkey to visit DH's family - but by the sea in peak summer - am actually a bit nervous about bikini's and K in the sun! it's so hot in July!!

Ooh, BB, you need one of these anti-UV tents or smaller model here.
And loads of cheapo versions of this.
Can't help with nervousness re bikini, though, I have been looking at one-pieces.This stuff looks nice, but the site is a PITA and I can't see the prices, which is always suspicious.

Minush, if you fancy a day out in the Luberon, give me a shout.
I'm less than a hour by train from St Charles...

Hi all...

ROFL at Boff's DH and his ignorance of the birds and the bees!

Juwes I have great admiration for your strength regarding this weight issue (because as you know I chickened out and reached for the formula fairly pronto). What is interesting though is that at the time I blamed my supply - I'm now less sure. Hannah isn't a greedy baby and she tends to eat until she isn't hungry anymore. If I let her then on formula she would still live on what a newborn is meant to have. Therefore I suspect she was doing the same when I was BFing and it is more difficult to force them to take extra bfing! Therefore expressing may poss help? She is also a tall baby - she was measured today and is 75th centile for height but still only 25th centile for weight. (maybe she's going to be a supermodel lol)

OK straw poll - am I to be trusted to take progesterone only pill in the three hour window each day? Can't decide whether to get coil fitted as it sounds like a hell of a hassle and there are reasons why I can't have anything else!