Aug 08: Baby-led Napping and Mummy-Led Chatting

[Sibh]

Ok here we go on thread no.

A restoring breakfast of Juice, coffee, toast, muesli porridge, croissants is on the counter.

MMMMM lovely breakfast thankyou. I actually have croissants at the ready. I am enjoying breakfast time with just me and marcus, which has never happened before. DD is still asleep due to not going to bed while gone 10pm and getting up several times after that.(very strange)
sazzles yes you can get them from boots about £22 I think.I am very very heavy,never been like this before,even after dd (but then as soon as cycle came back I got pregant straight away so suppose i dont know)
anyway yes bit icky at first
TMI ALERT PLEASE SKIP IF REPULSED
My loo is next to sink so empty rinse re insert.If you are out say public toilets and need to empty, it says to take a bottle of water with you to rinse, this I am afraid if faffing to me so untill i become used to it i will make sure i sort myself out before i go out,I left mine in 5/6hours I iirc,you can sleep in them but not done that yet.(but will) like buckets says it is more hygenic and i was paranoid about tss too.also no more icky than lilets.
of this Bristol meetup

Thank heavens you are back VG.
I was about to send out a search party.

The breakfast with marcus sounds lovely no1.

22nd good for me. Not sure if I'll be in Malvern or Devon, hopefully Devon as the train from Malvern to Bristol is a PITA if I remember - something stoopid like 2 changes and several hours.

Terrible day yesterday, I was trying to do Izzy's nap. Have started to put her in her cot awake, stroke and sing to her and only pick her up if she gets very cross. After half an hour DH barged in and said I should stop, I sent him off and after another half hour DD fell asleep in the cot. For me this is a BIG DEAL. But only stayed asleep five mins.
Cue DH having a go at me, blah blah blah. So I left him to it, had a shower got organised and went out. But front door keys were in my bag so I got an angry voicemail saying he had gone out with the front door unlocked.
We met, had some words and then some very angry words.
I came home and found a letter telling me that he didn't want to continue the relationship.
Well the day just went down-hill from there.

We're going to the counsellor on Wednesday, and DH has said he would like to make it work after all but I don't know how I feel.
I want our marriage to work, but how can I trust someone that told me they loved me two days ago and know doesn't know.
What I do know is love gets worn out and cannot thrive unless you care for it. And I'm not sure where I am.

I think he also assumes that if we seperate I will stay in France, I know that will be his preferred arrangement.

Oh and the other thing that is really annoying is that he uses my PND as a reason to not look at himself, just say's I am being unreasonable and unstable.

Arse and arse again.

Not even sure if I wan't to come to UK either.

Not really sure about anything.

Sorry to moan post and run. Showers to have, laundry to do etc etc.

Oh steaky, you have to come to UK, if only so that we can all give you RL hugs. Sounds like you need them. It's a good thing that you have the session planned for Wednesday and that he's still committed to being there. Hopefully the opportunity for calm conversation before you come over will be help to make things clearer before you have a bit of time apart.

Yum on the breakfast and thanks for weaving the new thread sibh.

Hello VG .

Good to have you and your wise words back VG. I second divorce not necessarily being a disaster for children. My parents clearly hated each other as we grew up, but their separation made it far clearer that they loved us as they were separate from us. It's only now, after 20 years that the animosity has passed and they really rather like each other that it's all rather unnerving . Sorry steaky that wasn't meant to be a connection to your situation, more a follow-on to VG's. How are things with DH today?

A week today the tent will be ours... Trying to avoid obsessive weather checking. DD1 SO excited though. Did you see this piece in the Sunday Times last week? Several people have oh so helpfully sent it to me .

Oh Steaky {{{HUGS}}} Iam useless with words but hopefully hugs will help. How are you getting from Malvern to Devon? Let me know if you need a lift to or from anywhere as I can always visit my folks and help you out.

Hi VG I had wondered where you were. Are you planning a Bristol visit?

Hi SIBH thanks for the new thread.

Morning Sazzles and No1.

Am trying to work on the sheets for our BF board at the health centre, DD sleeping I might need to join her.

Big (and rare from me) to Steaky. Can you make a list of all the questions on your mind and translate them into French ready for Wednesday? So its not just a list of things you're unhappy with but some positive answers too. Because you are both probably holding back somewhat and so having to make assumptions about how the other feels -you may both be surprised by the answers. I do think a break in the UK will be good for you both, he'll get some sleep and realise what he'd miss and you'll get some sleep and support and confidence.

And I've probably nagged before but do make sure you're on the pill! Tis my stock advice for anyone going through a bad patch in their relationship.

Snotty phlegmy coldy little boy today, which means I will have it by Wednesday...

steaky. Lots of hugs and supportive thoughts...

(ds waking up now but wanted to say that first)

just saving my spot for later

Thanks ladies.
Dr. Checked my blood results today, my blood is perfect - always good to know.
So I picked up my AD prescription and googled it, turns out it is a St Johns Wort.

Not on pill as still no periods and can't be arsed to go and struggle through more appointments.

I have done next to no journey planning other than to find out bro can't pick me up from airport, so will be training it Gatwick to Reading, REading to Malvern.

Better pack light.

Oh STEAKY [SAD] FOR YOU. i AGREE WITH WHAT OTHERS HAVE SAID THOUGH. i AGREE WITH BUCKETS THAT MAYBE BOTH OF YOU ARE HOLDING BACK AND SEEING AS HE HAS DROPPED THAT BOMBSHELL IT IS PROBABLY THE RIGHT TIME TO TELL HIM EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL AND EXACTLY HOW HE MAKES YOU FEEL. Its great that he wants to go to the session to work it out, but understandably you feel in limbo after what he said. You really should come to uk for visit.It may make things clearer.
Hope that made sense,soory for capslock I am in library and ds in sling, he just woke so no time to re write. I would be a bit if he cryed in here. It is sooooo lovely and quiet.
Oh apart from the muppet opposite with the shite music coming through his earphones
Tis quite funny though as he keeps singing random words every now and again.

Steaky - so sorry to hear that things are so difficult at the moment.

Sazzles - I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. That is truly awful. What an awful waste.

oh sazz. I too hate morotbikes. They scare me. I'm sure your friend was a careful rider, but so many motor cyclists just think they are immune to danger and I am terrified of seeing someone come off one one day

Oh sazzles that is so awful I am so sad for you all.

Steaknife

Hi - travelling by train might not be that terrible - DS cries in the car if we go anywhere for more than 30 minutes and so we are going to go by train up to my parents anyway.

But - what we have done before when no-one could make it to the airport is take a taxi. Probably about double the train fare but very stress free.

You will want to call round mini cab firms near your destination (not near Heathrow, and not a black cab because they are very expensive) and ask for a few quotes. I use www.yell.com to get local cab numbers

Sorry to hear everything is so rubbish. Sad news from Sazzles too. Lots of thoughts.

sazzles you should not apologise for anything. You are grieving too,and we are here to listen and support if we can.
Of course you are in shock and it could take a while to sink in.
Please don't feel you cannot talk about it. Thinking of you and your other friend.

Hi lwfh hope you are all well

Ok so I started bedtime at 6.30ish. ds asleep, dd not have now returned her to bed over 20 times. No tears at all and no talking. She has just said the odd 'hi' now and then. Bless. She is so tired,but not giving in. Had late night last night and no nap today
How on earth do they do it??????????
vg lovely to 'see' you back

I have been to the apothecary today and got some herbal thingy to help increase my milk supply, I also asked for some more nelsons teetha but they had run out so she made me their own concoction herbal remedy.
She also says it helps with irritability,collic/wind and said if you have to pick him up and carry him all the time then it should help.
I answered YES YES YES to all. So fingers crossed it helps the mardy clingy affectionate little bugger.

Oh Sazzles No1 Brilliant, you're doing really well with DD! Zero tolerance sounds horrid but it just means no debating - it will kick in as an automatic rule soon, once she's tested all her boundaries. Fingers crossed for Marcus's meds too.

Steaky Do you drive? Might it be cheaper to hire a car for a few days?

Took DS1 to continence clinic today, saw a proper doctor who said yes it's just toddler diarrhoea but for once it wasn't just left at that. She was actually really helpful and understanding and we talked for at least half an hour (DS good as gold). No free nappies til he's 5 in this area though. I am now working on a new bribe to get him to try and poo in the potty.

Getting my thyroid results tomorrow, don't know what I'll do if everything comes back totally normal. Take a preg test probably, would be just my luck.

Might be able to make 22nd in Bristol, would bring both boys with me so it might be a relatively short visit but a memorable one! Thinking about that restaurant we met in they might let us move the sofas around and make a giant playpen for us all.

Hi all.
Sorry to hear the bad news on this thread
On my home front there's been some arguing as well. DP says it's obvious I'm not happy. But it's mainly because a) we've hardly been well at all over the last 7 months b) DP is suffering from stress c)We don't see each other much because of his long hours and commute d) Little man stays up so we don't get our evenings to ourselves e) I'm tired of not working and need a little self-esteem boost. Thankfully though we have managed to talk about it, although I had to MAKE him talk, as he was just going to 'go out for a walk'. His working week is really doing him in at the moment though.
We had a poo DISASTER today. Seb was having nappy-off time, I went to make a cup of tea, and when I came back he had pood A LOT and then moved forward through it. He was covered (even had poo between his toes) and there was poo all over the playmat and the rug bleugh.

Sorry, that seems like a really self-absorbed post after the rather more distressing situations steak and sazzles are going through. Sympathies to you both though. Hope your counselling goes ok on Weds Steaky.