April 2005 babies!!!

[Gem1355]

Hi

Howz everyone doing?

Darcie is doing well but losing abit of weight after she put it on after inital weight loss but okay other than that.

would post a picture but don't know how!

Maya had her first day at nursery today. She went from 8am till 1pm. From Monday, it should be till 4.30 pm. Just taking it easy for her to get used to it. She is still being bf. I used to give her 1 bottle a day but was getting nipple confusion so I went back to exclusively bf. she fussed at feeding from bottle at nursery and only took 2oz of ebm in 2 feeds. I went and fed her at 8am and 11am and dh brought her home and I fed her again at 1.30 pm. Will try to keep her getting used to the bottle tomorrow and over the wkend. Please cross your fingers and pray for me that she does better by Monday.

Swampduck: I suggest weaning her off the dummy now. It will be hard now but harder for both of you the longer you take to do it. Can you see yourself getting up 3-4 times per night for the next, say, 4 mos time to pop dummy back. By then she will be a lot more attached to it?

Maya was being bf to sleep and since we got back from hols 2 wks ago she was getting up 3-4times a night after 12pm to bf in addition to a 10.30pm feed. this yesterday I bit the bullet and let her cry it out - using the Richard Ferber book as the guide. last night for the first time she slept from 7pm - 1.30am and then from 2am - 6.15am. Not a peep when I put her down last night, both times, wide awake and without feeding to sleep. There was not a peep when I put her down at 2am - wide awake.

It really only took Maya 1 day to get used to it. The longer you leave it, the harder & longer it gets for lo and you. Can you see yourself a sleep deprived wreck when lo is 8 mo old then trying to wean her from it? It may take 3days and nights.

Ferber suggests not starting until at least 5 or 6 months old. Maya is 4.5mo but never needed to feed like that before and I think it started over the hols because I would feed her at the first peep so as not to wake anyone else in the flat where we stayed.

Poor Maya. She was enrolled in Baby School of Hard Knocks. She's been in her own cot in her own room from 3 wks too.

Verso, pleased you are feeling better. what do you think is helping you feel better?

How do you feel having taken Maya to Nursery?? Fingers crossed that the transfer to a bottle goes smoothly for you. It is like you say, the quicker you do something the easier it is. We found that with a bedtime rountine linked with scheduled feeds. I only wish I had done it weeks ago, rather than waiting for nearly 4mths.

I am having 2 mornings at work next week to ease myself back in, but leaving Jack with DH, then leaving him at nursery for 1-2 hrs for 2 days at end of Sept just before i go back full time.

Jack is loving the weaning process, he gets really excited as soon as he sees the bib! I now have the freezer compartment of the fridge full of pureed fruit and veg. Enough to see us through til October!

Jack has now got his own website for us to list what he is up to for all our family and friends to see. If you fancy a peek have a look at this jackado is his nickname - well one of them anyway!

Aprilmeadow: it helps to go back to work if you really enjoy the company of the people you work with. I like my job because I like the camaraderie at work. no silly cliques like other places I have been in the past. ideally though we would have a creche at work for staff. When I knew dh was bringing Maya back home to me I could hardly wait for them to get here. went 2x to the gate to see if they were on their way and found myself with tears in my eyes when she finally got home - partly too because I knew she would be hungry and tired from not much sleep at nursery. She had some big cuddles and big feeds all evening long.

ps if that sounds strange, it is because I teach and don't go back till Monday.

Ah thats really sweet!

I love my job, and was looking forward to going back - if that doesnt sound mad - until i got half way through my leave, then it hit home! I am sure that it will be fine. My best friend had to go back to work 2wks after her DD was born (5yrs ago) because she had no choice, so i guess i am lucky that i will have had 5mths with Jack. Also it is blinking expensive being at home all day, what with coffee with friends and nipping to town every day nearly. Be cheaper to go back to work

I have been told i have to hit the ground running!! I am the PA in a design agency and it is go go go... lets hope i am up to it

Me too, Aprilmeadow - on both the loving my job bit, and also the hitting home bit. Been a bit wibbly this morning at the thought of DD going to nursery, even though it's a few weeks away yet.

I have also been told I'm going to be busy when I get back. Apparently, they keep saying, "let's do that when she gets back" so there are a lot of projects waiting for me. I don't mind as I'm keen to get back into the swing of things again. I've very much missed feeling useful and valued.

P.S. April, your website is lovely and the photos are gorgeous. Particularly love the tummytub and cardigan ones. Bless!

Hello

Well i'm joining those of you who will be going back to work in a weeks time, i go back the 12th i'm only doing 2 full days Monday and Tuesday, am looking forward to it but it will definetely tire me out!!!
I'll be doing monday 8am-5pm, Tuesday 9am-6pm.
Darcie will be with my best friend as she has a 2yr old boy and doesn't got to pre-school or school yet but goes to all the mother and toddler groups i go to so Darcie will still be round other kids for those 2 days!

She is getting a rite old clever clogs she's realy rolling around now and is swimming on the floor as she wants to crawl all ready is strong on her arms and pushes her legs forward but can't lift her belly yet!!!

Darcie is loving the weaning process loves her fruit and is getting there with veg she loves bolognaise! is enjoying her fruit juice and water and thankfully can drink it out of a cup!

Verso i'm so glad to here your feeling better!

Hi Alux, re dummy weaning - did you just withdraw it full stop or do it gradually?

full stop. no use prolonging the pain for both of you. don't start to try to do it before you understand what you are really doing and make sure you are committed to following thru otherwise you will find that you will get half way and have to try again later. again prolonging the pain for both of you.

Well, I was feeling better.

Feel terrible today. DH was looking after DD last night for me so I could get some sleep. I heard her at 3am as he was changing her nappy with the light on and she was screaming. I fed and settled her.

Then he told me once he goes back to work he will 'try' to do a Saturday night for me to help out.

Feel terrified now that I'm going to be so sleep-deprived again and ill And what am I going to do in a month's time when I go back to work too?

Got v cross. It's now Sunday morning and he's still not speaking to me because I got angry with him about it last night. Oh well.

Sorry - I didn't explain that very well. He was just doing last night because I do every other night (I am BF). He only made it to 3am - so it wasn't even a full night.

Am in tears. Don't know what to do. This isn't DD's fault... but he isn't speaking to me and I don't know what to do. It's horrible.

I just got upset and panicky about him only doing one night a week - and even then not promising to do it, just saying he would 'try' to do it. We've been over this before - how I don't get a choice to 'try' - I just have to do it, because if I don't, no one will - but he just doesn't get it. And now he's giving me the silent treatment and I feel terrible.

oh verso, I feel awful for you. i so wish things were not so complicated for you. I understand you dh's problems but he seems to forget that you both wanted this baby (hope I am right?) Despite his difficulties, he should not make you feel worse about how difficult things are for both of you. The silent treatment imho is emotional blackmail and he wouldn't do it unless he knew it was working. It does not seem like he is team playing. I am sure that if he was having physical difficulties and it was 'his turn' to help out with her, you would gladly take full charge. I am not there and shouldn't judge. You sound like you really need a 'big sister' at the mo. I would feel the same.

Thanks, Alux. We had a lonnnnng chat earlier today and got a few things sorted out. I think a lot of it is terminology and misunderstanding. He says he'll "try" rather than promising to do things, because he doesn't want to promise and then not follow through.

(And yes - we both TOTALLY wanted this baby!!!! I'm a bit that you might think we didn't, but I suppose I can see why you might think that from all I've been complaining/whingeing about lately.)

I now feel bad for posting on here (again) about stuff. Airing one's dirty linen in public or somesuch. Sorry!!

hello havent posted here for a while just wandering how all the lovely april babies are doing. alana is great got discharged from the cardiac clinic for her murmour last week although still need to go to see heart specialist but doc thinks it will be fine and will be discharged from there 2. shes now moved onto purees and makes as much mess as poss. really loves sweet potatoe and melon also likes the cow and gate veg caserole (normally mixed with some sort of veg. any1 who wants to keep up with her progress feel free to look here

no, no. i just don't know the situation. maybe one wanted the baby more than the other or it was an unplanned surprise that it adding stress. these things are all human, natural and understandable. I'm old enough and seen enough to not pass judgement. I didn't realise it sounded 'off' the way I put it. And don't be silly about dirty laundry. we all got them. if it's easier to write to cyber friends then by all means do. consider it a diary that answers back. I do!

glad you and dh have cleared the air. it is difficult for any relationship when a new baby is added to the mix. I've had rows with dh too. And so has my head of dept. who I admire immensely and is always so capable. I have cried on her shoulders more than once over the difficulties.

I like the idea of "a diary that answers back". That's a good way of putting it!

Not sure what today will bring... DH has gone off to work so it's me and DD. I have to wait in for a delivery which is a bit annoying as it rules out the going-out-with-the-buggy option for curing fractiousness (both hers and mine ) but let's hope they come early.

Verso, totally sympathise. DH and I have never argued so much since DD arrived... and at a time when you should both be so filled with joy (ha ha!). It's taken us a long long time to get into 'sharing' the night feeds, other responsibilities, etc., and I have felt put upon and exhausted and like it's only me that does anything for ages. I also worry what it will be like when I get back to work in Nov as DH will have to pull his finger out then as I will not be home to run the household like I am now. I just keep remembering that having a baby is such a HUGE adjustment... but it will get better. Also, baby will get easier and you will start to get more sleep and things will certainly start to seem better then! Sitting down and communicating as you say is the best way forward for everyone. Good luck...

I take it the inverted commas around 'sharing' are intentional?! Ooh it's good to know I'm not alone (although I wouldn't really wish the tension etc on anyone).

How do you manage on that little sleep, lockets?! If we have a night like that I feel terrible all day. Usually these days I get a chunk of four or five hours, then three, then one or two, which is manageable.

All my friends at the baby clinic have babies that sleep for ten or eleven hours in a go though, which amazes me. They all pity me (!), so I've stopped talking about it because I don't like them thinking DD is a 'problem' baby.

I had months where she didn't do more than an hour and a half at a stretch, and it affected me so badly that my GP thought I had PND and prescribed me antidepressants . Horrible horrible weirdness, sleep deprivation. Grim. How do you cope with it? Do you co-sleep or something?

Up stupidly early today because a car alarm went off at 2:40am and I've not been able to get back to sleep since. Managed to settle DD, but not me. Aaargh.