December 2008 - Its not wind they are smiling.

[JamInMyWellies]

Here we go ladies Rosmerta suggestion.

[EffiePerine]

BTW have you stopped bfing or cut down now? Because the hormonal changes can make you feel v weepy. I felt awful when I stopped feeding DS1 and we were down to one short feed a day.

[kayzr]

Pretty much stopped now. Have occasional feed as I just can't seem to help myself.

I can't stop myself from crying everytime I think about it.

[LadyThompson]

Afternoon all,

Been offline for a couple of days - one of DP's best friends died unexpectedly on Sunday, they think of a brain haemorrhage. He was only 39 and has DDs of 3 and 18 months. It's horrible . How his poor wife will cope I really don't know. Anyway, I know some of us on here are having a hard time at the moment but the fact is we are all extremely lucky and should try to enjoy every day, even the exhausting ones...

Loved the stats, ZJ, you clever old thing. You and Bisou have got those tidy sorts of minds that I wish I had...mine is like an overstuffed sock drawer.

Anyway - good to see some folk we haven't heard from for a bit, PIngu, Nolda, Hatty!

Great birth story, Simmo. Is that the last one now? What a shame.

Kim, are you feeling any better? And Turnip - what happened with the mastitis - did it just settle down? I haven't yet read Wife in the North - sounds good but a bit close to home! I'd better not read it until I feel settled, in case it incites me to pack up my little red and white spotted hankie and toddle back to the Big Smoke.

Poison - have you found a place to move to on April 1 or are you winging it? How are you feeling about that?

Arti - any luck with any of the teats? You can't stay in the for the next year, my dear. I HOPE you find one that works. I wish I could offer more practical suggestions...

Kayz - I hope you are feeling better. Stuff what your MiL thinks, quite frankly. You have done your best, my dear girl. I wasn't breastfed so much as a drop and I am not thick or allergy ridden or sickly or any of the other things. I know it is probably extremely irritating when people say this and I don't want to get on anyone's wick, especially those who are busting an absolute gut to give their babies the best start in life (especially as I am formula feeding), but...I guess I am just echoing others who have said that we are ALL too quick to heap blame on ourselves for every tiny thing.

And guilt, especially misplaced guilt, is just a flipping waste. It is the most senseless, useless emotion ever (with the possible exception of jealousy). Chuck the guilt away y'all. BIN IT. All our babies are adored and what better start in life is that? Lecture over

Oh, and Cat - I'd like to squirt your craniologist with a waterpistol. Telling a stressed mother of a baby with colic that the child is traumatised? For Pete's sake, what an idiot. DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF FOR THE COLIC. It's horrible and I really feel for you, but none of it's your flamin' fault and I think saying stuff like that is bound to be anxiety inducing. Grrr.

My Mum always tells me I was nearly a battered baby as I cried until I was two, pretty much non-stop. I very nearly sent her over the edge but after that, I was a jolly little thing. Weird, isn't it? There's a book by Oliver James (don't normally hold with such stuff but I did read this one a while back) called 'They *uck You Up' (ha!) and it's all about how your treatment as a child from 6 months to the age of 3 hardwires your emotions. I don't think I am going to be stinting on the cuddles ever, let me put it that way

SL - still haven't sorted out the contraception. Now my periods are back I REALLY have to sort this now. If I get pregnant again really quickly it will just be so embarrassing, aside from the practical. medical, emotional and financial ramifications...

Oh, and Jump - I reckon you should go out on Saturday night and have yourself a slap up meal. If she cries when you're out, what can people expect...

[CatDean]

Message withdrawn

[traceface]

Cat - i spend ages winding P in the day, she does mega burps and pukes, then at night, when she falls asleep on the boob, i just take her off and put her in the cot! same reason as you - i don't want her to wake up. i've also reduced the number of night time nappy changes for the same reason. sometimes she clearly has windy pain or she pukes, so then i have to take her back and try to wind her, but sometimes she does stay asleep without winding.i do waffle don't I?!!!!

verso - so sorry about how tough things are. Is your DP being supportive? Will pray for you. If there's anyway I can give practical help from Yorkshire, let me know! [very big hugs indeed]

Bisou - sorry about your loss. you're right it puts things in perspective.
this thread shows how different and unique all our precious LOs are - some like their milk, others don't, some sleep lots, others not at all, some like routine, others are oblivious - we really musn't compare because they are each their own person - but at the same time the support of knowing someone else is going through it is really valuable. And one thing in common...all the babies are very precious and very loved [hormonal out-pouring...!!!]

must do the ironing tonight but really can't do that one-handed so here's hoping i can put P down at some point soon!
xxx

[kayzr]

I know I am the most undecisive person in the group in fact probably on MN!! But I can not give up BF without knowing I gave 100000% so I'm going to try one more time. Even if he is mainly FF I'd rather keep trying to BF.

I know I'm mad

[LadyThompson]

Yes - and Verso, if you are still checking in I do hope you have got a bit of relief.

Re: winding, I do still wind DD even at night. She is still sleepy enough after. Otherwise I find it's just not worth it as she will wake up 5 mins later.

Had six week check yesterday, even though she is seven weeks today. She is barely smiling at all, even with wind. Man, she is a tough crowd. I guess she is far too important to waste smiles on DP or me, her mere SERVANTS...DP thinks he coaxed a wintry smile out of her playing peek-a-boo the other day but he is not sure [hmm}

I am very happy with DD having a dummy but need to think of a way to limit its use, as we are playing the Dummy Game a lot at the moment and it is very wearing (cries for dummy, gets it, waits for parent to sit back down and get all comfy, then lets mouth go slack so dummy falls out, repeat to fade.) If we let her cry for a bit, hoping she will forget it and then stop crying, she never, ever does I am taking it as a good sign (holding out for what you want is a good thing in my book) but I vaguely feel we should be a bit more ordered about it. Hmm. Not going to beat myself up too much about it, though. It's a dummy, not crack. Again, I had one as a kid for ages and I loved it, and it didn't turn me into a lunatic child, so the Dummy Police can take their flaming pitchforks elsewhere

[EffiePerine]

Quixk one from me as Max grumbling again - have just put DS1 to bed. Might try going to bed earlier tonight in the hope of getting some sleep!

LadyT: you are very right, even with all our wobbles and stresses it is so worth it .

Cat and Verso: hugs to you

[LadyThompson]

Hello Effie, sending you the finest Sandman Sleepydust (TM). How creepy is the Sandman, though? Funny, you don't hear so much about him nowadays, he was big when I was a child

[LadyThompson]

Hello Effie, sending you the finest Sandman Sleepydust (TM). How creepy is the Sandman, though? Funny, you don't hear so much about him nowadays, he was big when I was a child

[jumpjockey]

Quick one - just to back up one of LadyT's many fab points (gets out LadyT fan club pompoms) - I was bottle fed from the word go and have no allergies, never had any childhood ilnesses, don't appear to be too emotionally f*cked and have a phd from Cambridge so evidently formula can't be so bad - the fact that we all love and worship our babies counts for much, much more in the long run than what we feed them.

We are all doing a great job, no matter how knackered we may feel, how impatient we sometimes get and how inexperienced we may feel. We all need a big group hug and reassurance - everyone, put the baby down for a moment and get your DP to give you a big kiss

[LadyThompson]

Heeeeey, Jump, pom poms backatcha

Or should that be Dr Jump

The Sandman is probably in prison (chucking sandy sleeping dust in people's eyes as they sleep, particularly children? Not good. Not good at all.)

[kayzr]

Does anyone else find themselves watching their babies breathing?

I do it and if I'm not quite sure Dylan is breathing I gently prod him[bad mummy smiley]

[Turniphead1]

ladyT I am laughing away at your posts, supping my "spot of cheerfulness" ON MY OWN - well Dh doesn't get home til 9 what is a gal to do?? Am loving that O gives only mere "wintry smiles" to her staff. Fantastic. She is growing into her name, bless. Get the contraception sorted missus - you don't want to be like my cousin's wife, pg again after 8 weeks (the babes are what we call Irish twins - same school year).

Verso I am so gutted for you. Its a vicious circle- no rest, supply gets low due to exhaustion, baby gets unsettled, mum gets no rest. It's a total shocker. Can you not up the night nanny's nights? You need rest my love. Formula sounds very well called for in this instance! Take care, please.

Cat I feel for you so much. Presume you have tried a sling like the Karime? It will pass, it will pass - but I am not surprised you need a spot to keep you going.

Bisou lovely to hear from you. Sorry your LO is unsettled. I am dreading the 3 week growth spurt but know its coming. 5,000 sounds generous!

PD pingu and effie well up for a London meet up. A thursday suits me. Maybe Thursday 29th Jan?? How does that suit anyone else? LadyT
could we lure you in from the hinterlands?

Kayz you are not indecisive - just trying to make a choice. You go with what you think best. Best of luck.

Sorry brain addled now - hi to everyone else.

I had my first HV visit today and she was LOVELY and helpful and spoke sense!! How bizarre. L is nearly back to birthweight so she was pleased as was I. The mastitis/blocked duct seems to have resolved - yay - with heat and massage.

My DS (3) is SOOO upset at the moment. He is just reacting in a classic fashion to a new baby - no negativity towards her at all, but up during night (he normally never evr wakes) he wet himeself today, first time in about 8 months and just gets himself into a real state over nothing. I feel so badly for him (but he is also driving me nuts!). But got to spend a good bit of time with him today so hoping that heps. I know it will pass but I hate to see my boy so discombobulated.

[Turniphead1]

jump yayy - you sound like you have had a nice spot of cheerfulness - or just some natural cheer!

I am having some Ben and Jerry's shortly...mmmm Chunky Monkey!

[kayzr]

*Turnip I love discombobulated. I think it is the best word in the english language! You made me smile

I hope your DS gets back to his normal self soon. My DS1(22 months) is similar, he is now waking up in the middle of the night too.

[kmp1]

hi to all -
Busy 24hrs - H's g'dad in hospital and they didn't think he'd make it through the night so sat in the waiting room from about midnight until 4am. unbelievably he's still chugging along today however not looking good and the next 24 hours will dictate I think.
Anyway, DS has a cold and is very stuffed up and coughing - DH not too worried and says it's good for him He's still feeding well, even though it's hard for him to breath through all the snot in his nose while sucking! Hoping he will feel better tomorrow.
Had to laugh at some of your postings! i've done the toilet thing once too! and i always do the non-winding-at-night-cause-i-want-to-not-wake-him thing! works sometimes then other times like ladyt said, he's screaming 5 mins later!
Cat had to laugh that you were "out of cheerfulness" (guess not so funny for you right!)
Got a dummy for the nights he won't settle with the wind etc (so most nights) and he just spits it out! My baby actually spits the dummy - so that's the end of that!
Doing the gripe water thing now and seems to be the most effective so far however Dentinox not too bad either
Anyway - very keen for a London meetup - can do anywhere on the tube really. Verso hope u are back regularly soon

[LadyThompson]

Turnip, you can't beat banana flavoured items. Everybody knows that banana flavoured things are actually nicer than bona fide bananas.

Hooray that the mastitis has faded off!

Your poor little boy...

And yes, of course I am up for a meet up in London. I cannot knowingly stay away from a meet up I'll be there, with my sodding Baby Bjorn (and my crippled back). We were there last night (DP wanted to meet up with friends who knew his friend who died) and I am there this weekend. (And following weekend for driving refreshers, and also the following Saturday to see one of my client's shows!) 29th fine for me.

As for cheerfulness, I am on the champs again. I found a bottle of Tesco's in a cranny in the kitchen, so it doesn't really count

[majormoo]

zoe-loved reading your stats. Still cannot believe I managed to be 12 days overdue when the average for overdue babies was 6 days!

good point about the sandman!

Verso hope things improve soon

KMP best wishes for your dh's grandad.

[Nolda]

Ah, so nice to be in the post-natal section. I love the thread title too and jj your little one's gummy smile made my heart melt. I think DS smiled at me this morning but I'll wait for him to repeat the feat before I'm 100% convinced it's genuine.

Kayz I hope you get hold of your HV soon and that she will be able to help you. There are a few good HVs around despite their bad rep on MN. At our surgery we have one very good one. Unfortunately, she is also always in great demand.

I had a really bad afternoon with DD today, she wouldn't nap so no chance for me. At 2 and a half she knows exactly how to push my buttons. I know I'm the adult and should be able to rise above it but why does she want to reduce Mummy to a screaming loon?

I am also tempted by a London meet up but not sure if it would be practical and in any case, having seen LadyT's baby name thread, everyone probably thinks I'm a pretentious t**t with a child called Edwin ... we're quite a normal family really .

[LadyThompson]

Nolda, if anyone thinks I am a pretentious t**t, I tell you I will take it as a Badge of Pride. Edwin is a lovely name. Anyone who thinks otherwise can Naff Orf

[traceface]

hello again. Does anyone else still sweat horrifically on a night? I wake up literally dripping! I thought it was just a pregga thing but obviously not!
Am so tired tonight. Just caught myself in the mirror and I look like Scary Mary from the phones4U advert. I should be in bed as Phoebe is asleep, but I feel I deserve an evening so am staying up for a cuppa and a dose of Friends! Sometimes I'm wild!

[kayzr]

Nolda, my friend wanted to call her DS Edwin but her sil told her she would a snob if she did. So he is Daniel Edwin, she has regretted it ever since.

[mibbes]

ZJ yes I am totally mourning the speed at which my tiny baby is growing into a bigger baby. He started as a teeny 6lb 5oz and outgrew tiny baby, then early baby clothes and now as a 10lber he is getting a bit big for some newborn stuff. It breaks my heart every time I have to put away another set of clothes . Oh and Turnip's comment "It won't be long til they are wriggly 6 month olds who won't lay on your chest" just made me blub .
Am absolutely loving the stats !!

Katie I always sit up for the night feeds so that I stay awake, but have been waking in a panic the last few nights thinking I have fallen asleep with him on bed and that he has been squished/rolled out. I think I am almost doing the night feed on autopilot so I forget that I've put him back down !

Simmo lovely to have another 'bonus' birth story, thought they were all finished !

LT so sorry to read about your DP's friend, you are so right that it puts things into perspective. How funny you mentioned the sandman - MIL gave us a 8inch high model sandman for DS that used to belong to DP, it is EVIL looking !

jj your smiley photo is gorgeous ! I also love the 'action' shot of her screaming. I find it incredible that DS is simply angelic when asleep but such a devil child when screaming the place down - he looks sooo different !

Verso all I can do is offer you my heartfelt sympathy, I was astounded to hear of your lack of sleep. You really do deserve that break with FF. And how on earth are you supposed to express given the demands of your baby - stupid HV !!! hope you get some well earned rest.

Bisou thanks for the thrush advice. The cream seems to be helping the post-feed burning pain. Latch is still agony and the BF class today was useless - the HV just told me to try various positions which I am afraid to do as the pain may be even worse . I think I'll try NCT and see if they'll send out a BFC to help me.

[JollyBear]

Hello all,

Oooh post-natal - it's like going to big school!

nolda Edwin is a great name. I have a fantastic friend called Edwin . I don't think it is pretentious at all!

I'm tempted by the idea of coming to the London meet up too. I wonder if DD would like the journey .

LadyT Sorry for the loss of your friend. My carrier, a Bushbaby really hurts my back too. I don't know if I am wearing it wrongly or something.

trace I had the sweating thing for about a week after the birth, it was gross! I have no idea what causes it though.

JJ I'm another bottle fed baby with a PhD , not from Cambridge though!

I wind at night because DD doesn't usually go to sleep whilst feeding, she is just sleepy afterwards, if that makes sense.

I packed up my maternity clothes today and it felt really emotional for some reason. They're ready to go in the loft now, to be brought down at some point in the future I hope, although not too soon of course, I don't want irish twins

I thought what you said at the start of the thread was lovely turnip.

Hugs to all those struggling with sleepless nights, colicy babies etc.