May 07: The one where SOH gets her tweed clothes and LG&T doesn't get any...

[ShowOfHands]

New thread...

TYG-

Do you have a pacikeeper? One of those things that you clip to their clothes and it connects to the pacifier. It may help because soon he'll be able to find it for himself. I have an extra one and would post it if you need.

I'm a cold turkey person myself, but I do it at 1 year, "happy birthday, say bye-bye binky"

MJB- I don't know what to say. It sucks when friendships crumble like that. Invite them both over one day so everyone can play together. I think it's easier to make individual friends but forming a circle is tough sometimes.

I know the things you mean MKG, thank you so much for the offer, though. I have read a few times that after 4 months, babies don't get the same deep comfort from suckling, that newborns get; that after 4 months it's habit forming.

Since he's not wanting to suck the dummy all day long like he used to, and is finding his mouth then I thought I might see if we can give it up.

MrsJB - It's not you being childish, it's them! How very odd. Don't get me wrong, I have taken up with people in the past and then felt they weren't the friends for me and you just slowly lose touch, but this is quite a public "dropping". I wonder has something been said or misinterpreted? You just never know. Don't take it utterly personally just yet. I think MKG has a point about inviting them all over. If they make excuses, then be brave and say, "Have I done something to upset you, you seem to be trying to avoid me." Fck it, at that stage, what do you have to lose? I am wondering if they got close when you were away and something is making it feel awkward about you being a "threesome". I know how hard it is to make friends when you're away from home and I have felt the sting of being "left out" before. Only thing you can do is be the grown up and ask if something is wrong. If they still don't include you, then dust yourself off and move on. If the children still want to play together, then you must hold your head high and carry on making arrangements for them.

It's cold comfort, but if they're the sort of people who just drop good friends, (without reason and I'm thinking there's probably an explanation in there somewhere) then they're not worth knowing. If they'll drop a friend just like that, then they'll be the sort of people to talk behind people's backs and you want well out of it. Lots of love to you. x

Mrs JB - I agree with tyg. I had a friend 'drop' me this time last year, who I had even asked to be L's godmother. I used to spend lots of time with her, and all of a sudden, she decided that we had 'nothing in common' any more. It was really difficult, as I felt I had done nothing wrong. I think instances like this transport us back to our school days, and we feel like the one left out in the playground. I think that you should speak to them and ask them if there is a problem. Hell, put them on the spot, they'll be so embarrassed, but I think you deserve an explanation as to why you are seemingly being excluded from their 'gang'. It could be that they're just not the friends for you.

Sound like a pair of beasts. Shall I ferry over and dole out some of my scouse charm?

You are a braver woman than I. Just in my experience going cold turkey at 1 was easy with both of them. The first day/night was hard but the next it was life a usual.

Honestly though, cold turkey would be best, and in the end easier on everyone, not to mention faster.

TYG, out with the dummy oh Queen of Sleep, you know it is the only solution. Do it now, tonight and it will be sorted in just a couple of days. You know he needs to learn to fall to sleep on his own, why wait? Do it now and then when you are away next week he will have got used to settling him on his own. Sadly with no 2/3/4 and so on the daytime nap routine tends to be very broken as you are running around so much! Poor J was shunted from pillar to post during nap times, woken up when fast asleep etc etc, possibly that is the reason why he loves his daytime naps now!

Well done Pink! A united front will help you so waiting til Mark is around is a good idea, as long as he is totally on board with it too.

MrsJB we have that similar 3's a crowd problem, with the afore mentioned mum I moaned about earlier who I can't sadly phase out as recommended because she is one of my closest friends. MKG's suggestion is normally our solution, invite them all round and say casually that you are feeling a bit under the weather just now and value their friendship. Don't let it blow up into anything, they probably haven't even realised you are feeling like that. Also remember the majority of what you are feeling is PMT, honestly it is, you will look back next week and think, 'God how silly I was being, worry about this'. I have started to take Agnus Castus supplements and it is helping enormously, perhaps give them a try?

Now this made me smile and cry in equal parts today. At the end of the lane where dd's prep school is, there is a state primary school. Primary education is free and a great deal of these kids have nothing. I mean really nothing. Their school clothes have holes in them. All the dc at dds school have put together a shoebox filled with small items, pens, books, sweets etc and we have just handed them out. The children were delighted with their treasures, and so polite and thankful. It was incredibly humbling and made me want to cry. Sometimes you forget just how much you have and how lucky you are.

Sorry, I hope I didn't bring everyone down too much!

Hi all

Not sure on the dummy thing. Til had a pretty bad cold at about 7 months and couldn't suck it for a few nights. I just took the opportunity to take it off her then and not give it back. It was relatively painless

PJ - glad to hear of the progress on the sleep thing. Sounds promising

MJB - crappola about your friend/neighbour. Very odd and not very pleasant. Are you all champix free now ?

LG&T - Til was measuring huge in the last 10 weeks as well. She was a fair size (almost 10lb) when born but not as big as I'd been expected to believe. At one point, the consultant was suggesting an elcs

Scoot - sorry to hear you're feeling down. I can imagine social care is an especially tough place to be atm

MKG - love the name

SOH - come back, come back wherever you are. I chose a red wedding dress because of you and you have to come back to see the pics

Thats just so lovely TMAM

Thanks for your thoughts, you are right, all of you. I know it's worse for the pmt, feeling sad anyway etc... I will speak to my next door neighbour about it when I am calmer. I totally apriciated that she is intitled to her own friends and to do what she likes, I just feel that their actions have been a little insensitive. She asked me Tuesday if I was Ok as I seemed a bit down. I told her that I did feel down and that I was very bored, there didn't seem anything to do or anywhere to go etc... they still went without me yesterday.

TMAM you are the second person in 24hrs to suggest the herbs! The lovely Wattts said about them too last night, I will look for some here. I hope your situation is sorted soon, it would be difficult for me to phase out too, she lives next door, our kids are at school together, our parents are very good friends etc...... The school mother I couldn't really give two hoots about but I am hurt at friends actions.

PJ, sail on over, I want to see the scouse action,

J makes me smile now she does everything she's asked, put that there, get this for mummy, sit down, stand up. She is just so obliging it's the cutest.

M makes me smile when she asks me if she is my best friend and tells me I am hers.

H just cracks me up full stop, he is hiarious, camp, witty, intelligent, noisy and a pain in the arse!

Hey tilly, yeah all nicotine free, have been off the tablets since end of August. Today I feel like one though, but I will not. How about you? smoke free still?

Yes - we relapsed after the last time but have been off for ... oooh .... I think its 7 weeks now. Have hardly thought it about it all. It really feels like its "forever" this time. Its amazing how you can still get an urge though - even such a long time after stopping.

I forgot my "things that make me smile"

I always say I love you to the moon and back to Tilly when putting her to bed and she often comes up to be know and says (her version) of it. Its so cute

She's a real little bookworm and loves to pick a book out and bring it over and say "story" over and over.

She's obsessed with Dora the Explorer. We were in a toy shop the other day and they had some hideous children's cd on and the theme tune came on. Tilly went running round the shop (looking for a tv no doubt) excitedly shouting "It's Ora. It's Ora, It's Ora"

Oh bllx. In fit of rage from listing to A whining and moaning about socks on, socks off, wellies on, wellies off, coat on, coat off, I went into the kitchen and kicked the crap out of the bin in temper. It's one of those Brabantia ones and have just looked and they're £100. Bugger. May have to dig out the rubber mallet and try to knock it back into shape. DH will go mad.

Tell him you'll kick the crap out of him unless he buys a new one without judgement.

Things that make me smile? The spontaneous cuddles, and how L pats my back when she hugs me.

Oh, I could just eat her up.

Hmmmm kicking the bin sounds appealing. at PJ. Remember TYG, smiley thoughts. lol

J says "see" all the time, makes me smile, yesterday we even got, Mummy, Daddy see! She also makes me smile when she stands up to M. NO, she shouts followed by a talk to the hand cause the face aint listening hand! Norty and cheeky but funny!

We're on a roll now. There is a very cute but mischevious little boy at nursery, and every time we mention his name, L wags her finger. He must get told off a lot!

Things that me smile,

When we have our family lie ins at the weekend. Archie likes to have his feet stroked and he nudges me until I start stroking them.

I love it when A grabs hold of Dp's scraggly scruffy beard (dont ask) and pulls him towards him for a beardy kiss.

When I see DP and A playing together sometimes Dp will do something and A copies him they really are 2 peas in a pod.

I love the way Archie and Louis run around playing together then they collapse on the floor rolling around together. I do hope A doesnt think he is a dog.

When trying to tell the munchkin off and he just looks at me with those massive blue eyes and blonde curly hair with the cutest smile. It makes me melt.

Yesterday when I felt like poo A sat down beside me on the sofa and stoked my hair.

Blimey there is loads now I take the time to think about it. Thanks TYG.

MrsJB I would invite your neighbour round for coffee and just be honest with her otherwise it will escalate.

TYG the only thing I would say is just crack on with it.

Tilly how long to go now cant wait to see the pics.

MrsJB how odd of your friend. I hope that things sort themselves out and she realises waht a fab person you are and that she cant not have you in her life

It is hard when you get dropped by friends, as you know i am still struggling to deal with being dropped by all of mine and thats just down to one bitch of a girl who couldnt just be happy for us. The sad thing for me is that she and her dh are J's godparents and i feel that he is the one that has lost out more. But you do just have to dust yourself off and move on.

YAY Pink well done on the sleep again and also that you are both going to work on this together.

TYG I cant offer any advice on dummies as J wouldnt take one and E has always sucked her thumb (must think about when that needs to stop as i can see her teeth are looking like thumb sucker ones already). I think you know that you need to be brave and just do it.

Things that make me smile:

1. When Ella pats my back when she gives a cuddle

1. When Jack really praises Ella for something she has learnt

1. When i hear them in fits of laughter playing beautifully (despite the mess they are making whilst having fun)

1. When we went shopping the other day and she got so excited at seeing a Minnie Mouse toy and grabbed it and hung onto it for dear life. Laughing and patting its back

1. When she picks up a dolly and shushes it to sleep - she looks so cute

1. When Jack tells us that he we are his best friend and gives us 2 handed kisses.

1. When they are both sleepy and they give you that lovely cuddle

Ella is such a gorgouse little sausage, and, well, you know how L feels about Jack!

When are you back AM??

Er, that would be gorgeous.

Oh didn't AM mention..... sh's given me her house and she is going to shak up with mikey!

He's really scrummy that Mikey don't ya know!!! Or was it Mickey...hmmm oh yes thats it. jesus PJ it's catching!

Ha ha. I'll fight you for Meadow Towers. Actually, just give me the robot. That'll be fine.

PMSL at AM shacking up with some random block called Mikey

TYG - 9 days to go !!! Next Saturday is the big day.

Who's Mikey? and why is he a block?

You'll have a fight on your hands as my sister has taken ownership of Meadow Towers whilst we are away.

Woo we have a hot day today..... its going to reach a whopping 19degrees! That means only one sweater

MrsJB, how's H's face? J's scab is getting to the point where i just want to pick it off. Its taking everything in me to leave it alone!

We are going to Epcot today (my least fav park) and then to Magic Kingdom tonight where they are transforming it into a winter wonderland. Snow on Main St USA and Father Christmas on his sleigh. Am hoping the kids will have a mid afternoon nap so they are able to enjoy tonight.

We leave here on Saturday and get home at 7.30 on Sunday morning.

Have managed to get a few Xmas presents whilst here which is good and am hoping that i can get it all finished by the end of the month.

How exciting Tilly! When is the virtual Hen Party?