APRIL 2008 - The One Where We Step Away From The Psycho Pill and Try Not To Need Pregnancy Tests!!!

[VictorianSqualor]

Our Babies

07 March: Ashton, a fourth child for gemprincess, 5lb 13oz @ 34+6
09 March: Ted, a second DS for Daftmoo, 7lb 14oz @ 36+0
21 March: George William, a first baby for KnitterintheNW, 7lb 2.5oz @ 37+3
25 March: Olivia, a second baby for TheMaskedPoster, 7lb 2oz @ 38+4
28 March: Pablo, a third baby and first DS for vacaloca, 7lb 14oz @ 39+4
28 March: Matteo Alexander, a first baby for Gangle @ 38+0 (?)
30 March: A baby girl, a second child for PortAndLemon, 8lb 15oz @ 39+5
02 April: Jak, a baby boy for rainbowdays, 9lb @ 39+1
02 April: A baby boy, a second child for bunyanvillas, 6lb 14oz @ 37+5
02April: Struan, a baby boy for Donnabels, 6lbs 15oz
02 April: A baby boy for mummyofaprincess @39 weeks
03 April: A baby girl for PippiCalzelunghe @38+2weeks
03 April: Aeryn Daisy, a baby girl for Denny185, 9lb 8oz @ 39+3
03 April: Benjamin, a baby boy for Micegg, 8lb 3oz @ 39+4
03 April: Roelof Grové, a first DS for SalLikesCoffee, 7lb 5oz @ 38+5
03 April: A baby boy for siikibam, 6lb 8.5oz @39+1wks
04 April: Matilda, a baby girl for AprilsFoolsBaby 7lb @
05 April: Ellis, a baby girl for MadameOvary
06 April: Henry Peter, a baby boy for Sheds, 7lb 130z @ 40+4
07 April: Sebastian George, a fourth DS for Peachy, 8lb 4oz @ 41+1
07 April: Jack, a first baby for ThePFJ, 7lb 5.5oz @ 41+1
07 April: Lexie Bea, a fourth baby for babywhiting, 8lb 1oz @ 39+4
08 April: Alasdair, a second DS for bunnyrabbit, 8lb 5.5oz @ 40+3
08 April: James Samuel, a third baby for honeybee10, 6lb 7oz @ 37+2
09 April: Zara Mia Martin, a first baby for V1KK1M, 7lb 10oz @ 41+0
09 April: Jasmine, a baby gilr for Niceychops
11 April: Kyran for rdk, 7lb 13oz @ 38+3weeks
11 April: Sebastian James, a second baby for Fleecy, 10lb 2oz @ 40+4
11 April: A baby girl, a first baby for CeylonSapphire, 7lb 12oz @ 41+1
11th April: Florence, a baby girl for LouMoose
12 April: Maya Alice, a first baby for egyptianprincess, 8lb 15.5oz @ 40+3
12 April: Sophia Viviana, a second DD for AussieDivaonaBreak, 6lb 12oz @ 39+3
15 April: Alexander Oliver, a third baby for VictorianSqualor, 10lb 3oz @ 41+0
16 April: Ailish, a first baby for Mollyfloss, 6lb 11oz @ 40+3
16 April: A baby girl, a second baby for elfsmummy, 7lb 13oz @ 41+1
16 April: Zoe, a baby girl, a first baby for ToastAddict, 6lb 10oz @ 39+3
16 April: Jasmin, a baby girl, a first baby for Eggandketchup, 9lb 3oz @ 41+4
17 April: A baby boy for paranoidmumy, 8lb 9oz @ 41+4
17 April: A baby boy, a second son for lorisparkle, 7lb 12.5oz @ 41+6
17 April: Benedict, first baby for LadyBee 9 lb 3oz @ 41 +2
18 April: Millie, a baby girl for scorpio1 8lb 9oz @ 41+?
18 April: Cameron, a second baby for munchkinmum @ 39+5
19 April: Oliver Michael, first baby for bashboid, 7 lb 4 oz at 41 +3
20 April: Samuel, a first baby for Velbels. 8lb15oz at 41+1weeks.
20 April: Angharad Mai, 8lb 4oz, 40+6, first for 7monthsplus
20 April: Emilia, 7lb15oz, a first baby for SuzeM, 40+6
20 April: A baby girl for SushiMama
21 April: Eve, a second baby for OMaLittle, 8lb 4oz @ 39+3
21 April: A second DD for Monmoo
22 April: Sam, a second son for Soph73 @ 40+0
22 April: Molly, a first baby for EllieG, 8lb 8oz? @ 40+5
22 April: Daisy, second baby for AttilaTheHan @ 40 +3
22 April: Zoe Olivia, second daughter for Piccallilli2 7lb 1oz @42+1
22 April: A second DD for blinks.
23 April: Jessica Elizabeth, first baby for BabyBratt @ 40+1 7lb 12oz.
24 April: A baby girl, a second daughter for christmaspixie, 9lb 2oz @ 40+6/41+5
24 April: Miya Jade, baby girl for ShelleySare at 39+4
25 April: Amelie, a first baby for Dondons, 9lb, 41+3 (i think!)
25 April: Aisha, a second baby for Jaq39 7lb 14oz @ 41+4
26 April: Hope Olivia, a second dd for northeastmummy, 7lb 11oz at 41 .
26 April: Gabriel, a third child for Bainmarie @ 41+5
26 April: Eli Michael, a baby boy for LittleMissTurquoise, 7lb 15.5oz @ 40+5
27 April: a baby girl for Ayomi, 6lb 1oz @ 41+0
28 April: Jacob Andrew, a 2nd DS for Kaybeeand2boys, 8lb 4oz @ 41+5
29 April: Thomas Henry, a 2nd DS for TLSM, 7lb 8oz 40+3
30 April: Harry Samuel, a fourth ds for Chipmonkey, 9lb 5oz @ 39+2
30 April: Ellie, a baby girl for Annamama
30 April: A second DD for luckymummy74
01 May: Sophie May, a baby grl for Annieroo, 6lb 5oz @ 41+4
01 May: Euan George, a baby boy for Jenniejennie, 8lb @ 40+4
02 May: Robyn Olivia, a baby girl for soph28, 8lb 1oz @ 42+1
05 May: Nora Martina, a first baby for Eva07, 7lb 8oz @ 41+2
05 May: A baby boy for Beeper, 8lb 10oz @ 41+0
05 May: Gabriella Summer, a first baby for MommyHasAHeadache, 8lb 4oz @ 40+6
06 May: Wilf, 8lb 60z for bigbadmom @ 41+6
07 May: James Andrew, a second ds for Moominsmummy, 8lb 13oz @ 41+5
08 May: Ellie Isabella, a first baby for Carey87, 7 lb 8oz @ 42+1
08 May: Robin David, a 2nd baby for Woollymummy, 8lb 11 oz @ 41+3
09 May: 4 kittens for scorpio's cat!
10 May: Astrid Mary, a second dd for sagitta, 8lb 8oz @ 42+0

My brother is trying to get hold of 35 Wii Fits for a work promotion (as in marketing event, not as in "collect 35 Wii Fits and we'll promote you"). They have 15 so far and are scouring continental Europe...

I have to admit, when dh brought the piece of paper with the number on I was sure he misunderstood! Only when we had the actual thing in our hands did I believe it - even at checkout I thought they'd realise their mistake at collections! He's been asking in every shop that might sell it for the last 2 months! I've also been registered on that wii check e-mail notification thing, but only places that ever have them are those that charge over a hundred for it - sharks! For what it's worth, this was the Toys R Us in Old Kent Road. When we bought ours there were 7 left (they got 8 in stock this morning).

PAL, I've heard that most of the European Wii Fit stock stay in Germany where the European Nintendo headquarters are. Here's a link I just found by Yahoo search - haven't used them, but might help your brother with their search?

Yes I've heard they are very hard to get hold of....

Yes Denny I am feeling a bit less tired thanks. I did a 10 mile bike ride on Thurs and a circuits class last night, I think I need to do a bit of exercse to boost my energy IYSWIM.

Oh blimey, I feel a bit tipsy after 2 glasses of wine!!!

PAL he's got a challenge on his hands to try and get 35 I wish him the best of luck.

So Sal and Scorpio will be wii fitting and Luckmummy is out and exercising again, really must get off backside and do something, schools back is a week, will walk every day ....... unless its raining

can't believe the schools go back already??! It feels like they've only just broken up??

Easy for me to see....one who doesn't have school age kids. I'm sure it hasn't 'flown by' for all you mums with school kids!!

Actually hasnt been as bad as i thought it was going to be. Think weve only had 4 or 5 days where the weather hasnt allowed us out, so cabin fever didnt really strike. Its also been nice not having to do the school run and letting DD2 do her own thing rather than enforcing a routine to fit in with everyone else. Oh and not to mention the lay in's, 8am most mornings, bonus.

Going to try and catch up on some lost sleep now, night all.

Well, first day update: I love the wii fit! Some bits a bit boring/silly, but that's to be expected from any game I guess. All in all I might actually get a bit more fit this way, whoo hoo!

TMI warning (skip if having lunch...) : After reading loads of threads on here about it, I've done the swop - I'm now a Mooncup convert! The idea freaked me out a bit (always thought it's a bit hippy-ish tbh), after first use I ran for the tampons, but there's no going back, it's so much more comfortable. Sorry for that , but thought I might now try and persuade the world, hehe.

Quiet day here. Roelof's having a nap, but once he's awake I want to go to the shops to buy a tray for his Bumbo. He doesn't really like it that much, but I think it's because he can't reach his toys on the ground, so I want to see if the tray will help. Risky really, might waste another tenner, but otherwise it means I've wasted £30 anyway... And I guess I can always sell it on as "as good as new" if it doesn't work. Fingers crossed.

i love wii fit (when i can walk )

been park today, also realised we gave tax credits wrong figures, so sorted that out. They have underpaid for last 20 weeks , we shall see..

fish pie for tea today, yummy. small bit for me.

I'm going to get a mooncup when my periods come back proper, I've read a 101 threads on them!

RE: the friend of Denny, slapping her LO for 'discipline' I used to use time out/naughty step methods but found myself getting so stressed out over it. I recently bought 'How to talk so kids listen and how to listen so kids talk' it's FAB!

I really can't believe how well it works, how good it is and how little I get stressed out using it!! Recommend it to anyone, or I have typed up a summary of the first five chapters to go inside our kitchen cupboard to check when something needs 'dealing with' which I'd be happy to post if anyone wants me to.

Been at PiL's today for a BBQ and MiL palmed off half her kitchen contents on em so I'm trying hard not to scoff a black forest gateaux

I've had a moncup for ages

(not Bas'sbaptism- nephew (not the one with the BIL wearing jeans, other one). Got to book ours when the boys go back.

VS, I would love to read your summarised version, even if I can't really use it now. Would you mind posting it, please?

Peachy, must have been weird with the ex. I'm still on good terms with my exes (not in contact, but no hard feelings either way), but still find it kind of awkward seeing them again. Great if you're looking perfect though!

Made marinated chicken for lunch, impressed dh. (I pretended I knew how to do this all along, but made up the recipe. Living life on the edge. )

Have also had mooncup (or Keeper in the original days, which is just another version of the same thing) for ages too and would never go back to pads/tampons -- paradoxically much more yucky (had to use tampons once a couple of years ago when I had a weird cycle and got caught away from home without my Mooncup, and I was astonished that in the past I'd put up with them every month). They take a couple of cycles to get used to IME, bur then are soooooo much better and more comfortable.

Started off today with DH taking DS to A&E (fell off sofa and cracked head and needed to be glued back together). Sigh. He seemed fine this afternoon though, and split his time between being Superman and "Clunk Kenter" [sic, don't have the heart to correct him]. But he needs to keep the glue dry for a few days so swimming (tentative plan for tomorrow) is out.

Fortunately my only ex of any significance lives in Ipswich so I'm relatively unlikely to bump into him and hence have no need to look perfect. Well, no more perfect than I normally do, anyway .

I love How To Talk although must find and re-read my copy. The getting-your-child-to-do-things (as per wet towels example) doesn't seem to work on DS, though. Perhaps his chip was installed wrongly? Or perhaps it'll work better as he gets older?

PAL, that sounds horrible for your poor DS! Good to hear he sounds indestructable though!

1)Describe what should be done.
? Dirty clothes need to be put in the dirty box

• Toys belong in the toy chest.
• Sofas are for sitting on.

Instead of ?pick those clothes up? ?put those toys away? ?sit properly on the sofa? information, not orders.

2)Acknowledge a feeling.
? It can be lonely playing by yourself.

• Bobby ripping your book made you sad.
• It is disappointing when you have your heart set on doing something and then you aren?t able to

Instead of ?just go and play and stop being silly? ?It?s only a little rip, if you?d put it away it would never have happened? ?It?s not that big a deal, it?s raining you can?t go, end of?

3)Fantasise
? I wish our sofa was so strong you could jump all over it, really strong, as strong as superman, and HUGE, like a house.

• How great would it be if we had an invisible toy box, so we could keep toys downstairs without then looking messy? Just press a button and it?s invisible, but we?d have to remember where it was so we didn?t trip over it!!!

Instead of ?Stop jumping on the sofa, it will break? ?I don?t want toys downstairs, they look messy, put them away?

4)Explain your feelings.

• When things are messy it makes me feel fed up because I will have to tidy it all up again.
• If you hurt your brother, I get sad because I love you both very much and don?t like to think of you in pain.

Instead of ?stop making a mess!? ?Don?t hurt your brother?

5)Use the written word.
? Put a notice up saying ?cake making, today at 2:30pm for children with tidy rooms?

• Leave a note with the washing when put in bedroom ?This washing needs putting away?
• Leave a sign on the bedroom door ?I do not like to be slammed, it makes a loud bang and could break my hinges, Love from Your Door.

Instead of ?tidy your room, now, if it?s not tidy you won?t be making cakes you hear me?? ?Stop slamming the door?

6)Don?t punish, give natural consequences
? This toy is broken, it now has to go in the bin.

• The noise you are making is distracting me when I am trying to work so you will have to stay upstairs out of the way.
• Fights mean people get hurt so you are going to be separated.
• You didn?t go to the toilet so you have to get in the bath, after the bath we go to bed so you will be in bed early tonight.

Instead of ?You?ve broken your toy so sit on the step? ?You?re being really noisy when I?m trying to work so you can?t have sweets? ?You didn?t use the toilet so I?m taking your teddy?

7)Don't over praise.
Describe something, instead of saying how great it is.
Children do not like to feel patronised, so instead of 'What a great painting' say 'I see you've done some circles, there, and a red line here, this picture has a lot of colour in it', that way they will be proud of themselves, rather than needing reassurance.

8)Acknowledge the struggle.
If a child is finding something hard to do don't jump straight in to help them. 'It can be fiddly doing buttons up' 'Opening crisp packets is tricky' if you offer advice say 'Sometimes it helps to do the zipper up first' 'Sometimes it's best to have dry hands when opening crisp packets as the grease from your hands can make it tricky'. Always say 'sometimes' incase it doesn't help.

PAL I find that my two are very selective with the 'Wet towels make the bed damp' technique but love the written word, I'm forever going to the cupboard to read this so I can think the best way to deal with things one day I'd like to think it comes automatically!! Hope DS is ok, that's two A&E trips on this thread in a week, who next? They say it comes in threes!

Thank you very much, VS. I've printed this out for future use - will think of you in years to come!

Oh, meant to say, I won this yesterday for the nursery. I just need a rocking chair now.

Sal, the main thing about how to talk is that children learn to do things because they need doing, and not to do things because it is wrong, rather than to do/not do things because they are fearful of punishment or because they want reward. It's a lot more in detail than what has been put there, that's just my summary that I use to remind me and that I use for DP to refer to because I know he won't sit and read a whole book!

There is more, one of the things I use most is I not You. Saying 'You blah blah blah' to someone feels like a personal attack, saying 'I blah blah blah' doesn't and makes the person much more likely to listen, I do it with everyone now! Same with the written word, yesterday DP was worrying that our new house is going to get wrecked because it is smaller so I got a pen and paper, wrote down his specific concerns and an action to sort it out, I think sometimes it is just nice to know you're being listened to, and writing it down proves you care.

Also, I explained something to DD yesterday about positive and negative conversations. As soon as someone says No, the Nos keep coming, and the same with Yes. For example, when DP tells DD to do soemthing she seems to start all her answers with 'I'm just...' So the conversation goes like this.
DP:'DD go in your own room please, out of mine'
DD:'I'm just talking to Alex'
DP: I said, your own room, now.

Because she has basically said 'no' to him. I'm just... sounds like, No, I'm not going in my room because I'm doing something else. So I've told her to start all her answers with a yes and a question. Same conversation with a Yes undertone would be

DP:'DD go in your own room please, out of mine'
DD: Ok Dad, can I talk to Alex?
DP: Ok, DD.

Because she listened to him and said yes, he will listen to her and say yes. The words don't really matter it's the general tone the conversation gives off, is it positive or negative? Like with the 'sometimes' trick. If you say 'Sometimes X helps' it's like a clue, a tip, if you say definitively 'X helps' and it doesn't work, you may as well just say 'You can't do it' because it's the same tone.

You probably know this sort of stuff anyway so forgive me for going on!!

Oh no, I love this, thanks for continueing! I think it's one of these things that you know, heard or read about ages ago, but then forget about completely. It's like nagging - sure, everyone knows it doesn't help, it's counterproductive etc, but unless you actually sit down and think about it, you just continue in your old ways. These "rules of conversation" if you like, are really great - I've shown this to dh as well and he likes it too. Result!

By default I tend to answer negatively anyway - e.g. if someone asks me whether I'd be able to do something (more in a work situation, but applicable to anything, I'm sure it spreads through to everyday life, it's just less noticeable), I'd first state what I can't do, and then try and finish it off with something positive, instead of just focusing on the positive. Dh (who for some reason believe I can change the world if I want to, bless him) had this talk with me a couple of months ago, saying I should stop doubting myself. But the weird thing is, I didn't actually, it was just the way I tried getting the negatives out of the way in my head first. This however fits in perfectly with what you said about answering - by me doing that, I start the conversation with a "no".
Will you be my personal shrink???

Urgh, trying to book our flights to South Africa and it's a nightmare! Firstly rediculously expensive, but we don't really have a choice, so I just have to get over it, and secondly, trying to add another short holiday somewhere exciting, but that seems next to impossible. Finding somewhere in Africa that's malaria free is impossible! (At least the parts of SA we're going to is fine, so no malaria worries there.)

I'm now thinking maybe we should keep a week's worth of dh's leave and go somewhere in Southern Europe later in the year.

Also considering robbing a bank while I'm busy with my annual planning. Only need to arrange a couple of hours childcare for that.

i would babysit sal, if you wanna share the robbed money??

Deal, would make the travel planning a lot easier too! My place, next Wednesday, 11:49 am.

I think the holiday later in the year sounds better...

I've just made a cake!
We had bananas spoiling on the kitchen bench so I dusted off the old favourite cookbook and have produced a very presentable banana cake. Now just have to do the icing, yum yum.

Our efforts to get DS out of feed-to-sleep have been going really well, I've been making sure I feed him reasonably soon after he wakes up from his nap and then we've been taking turns to get him down for naps, and have just about got a method sorted that doesn't involve too much jiggling etc. We're still a way off being able to put him down and have him settle himself to sleep but I feel better about what's going on than I did.

VS, that book does sound good. I still haven't ordered it - decided to work my way through the books held by my library first and have quite a pile waiting for me. Might write a similar summary and post it for any books I think useful - good exercise for my brain and hopefully some of the info will stick by doing that work.