April 2007 - Weebles wobble and they DO fall down

[PillockInThePumpkin]

anyone remember Weebles?

Hi everyone

Dippy - so glad DD1's op went well. Wishing her a very speedy recovery.

Maveta - at your freak weather. We had a similar thing here a couple of weeks ago, our area was hit by mini-tornados. Very freaky.

Leaky - sending thoughts get-well vibes to little Eva Rose, and hope your SIL is doing OK.

Am rather today, in fact on the verge of tears and really want to curl up and make the world go away. Things are not good with dh, he really upset me last night and I can't live with all the stress that seems to be going on with our household at the mo. He is mega-stressed with work, works all the bloody time, we never seem to get any good consistent, quality family time together and I am sick to death of it. He gets so wound up and stressed out that he just stops talking to me, so I automatically think that whatever is going on is my fault somehow. Apparently it's nothing I've done, he's just worried about work; he can't leave work at work, he worries about what people think of him all the bloody time, but he seems to forget about my needs (i.e. a husband who can actually be bothered to talk to me when he gets in from work). I'm sorry, but I'm just so fed up with it all. If this carries on I swear I'm going to take the gilrs and go.

oh IDOC
Can you tell him that? Why is he so stressed at work - is it with good reason or is he a worrier by nature?
Dippy, how is DD's eye now? Has it stopped hurting?

SMB I have told him that. After a period of totally ignoring me as I prepared dinner last night, I thought 'stuff this' and went upstairs for a cry and he eventually came and found me. He could see I was upset and I kept asking him what was wrong, was it me, was it work, what could I do to help, how could I support him more etc etc. But he can't even give me a proper answer, won't even look me straight in the eye. He is an absolute born worrier, he always worries that he's not as good as he should be, he worries what other people think about him all the time, when in fact he couldn't work any harder, he always gives 100% effort at work and gets good results, but he just can't see it. He's had lots of problems with certain members of his staff recently (he's in charge of >70 people), and he just takes every little problem as a personal insult.

He had a meeting with his boss this morning (his boss is the sort of guy who takes no shit and says it how it is), and it's either gone very well, or very badly (he hasn't phoned so God along knows), and the outcome of the meeting will determine what sort of mood he's in for the next few days.

We had an absolute shit Christmas day last year for exactly the same reason (i.e. his high levels of stress leading right up to Christmas Eve) and we have previously agreed we will not let things get as bad again. Yeah, right.

I am not the kind of person who sits there meekly pretending this is not happening, I have tried to confront him, to be positive, to be supportive, but he just shuts me out. I feel like he's pushing me away and I'm am just getting so sad and so angry.

I'm sorry to go on. I don't usually write things on here about our relationship, but I am really struggling today.

aww IDOC
at work at mo but will send hugs (and we all know i don't do that lightly!) and come on for a chat when i get home x

OMG a Pillock hug
I had heard about them but thought they were just urban legends
Not sure what to suggest IDOC My DH is similar but not to the same extent (at all) but I find it really hard - you try to be supportive, but you also want to say that there is a point at which he just has to stop worrying.

Pillock I am honoured, and very grateful .

Exactly SMB, I wish he would get his priorities right as I fear his family come 2nd place to work in his thoughts right now. I just can't see an and to this as it comes in cycles and, quite frankly, I am sick of it. He used to be like this in his previous career, and I can remember bleak times back then. But that was before children and it was easier to throw myself into some selfish pursuit and wait until he'd got over it. Can't exactly do that nowadays.

Gotta go and feed S, back later x

Hi all.

IDOB, I am so sorry to hear what a pants time of it you are having. That coffee and rant session is needed sooner rather than later.

Unfortunately, I am not sure what to suggest. Dh can be very much the same, but fortunately, the penny drops and he lets it go iyswim. Dh doesn't manage any staff and I imagine that is a bloody pita for your dh or anyone, as staff are a nightmare.

Big hugs to you.

All ok here. B is at school, and unbeknown to her, dh will hopefully be picking her up which she will be thrilled about.

K has a rash all over her back and a bit on her tummy. She had a slight temp a couple of days ago, but is eating well. She has seemed quite tired. Do you think I should be worrying?

I don't feel worried, but then feel bad that I am not iyswim!

Being a parent is a nightmare!!

Eva update:
To recap - SIL went into hospital at 4am yesterday having had pains for most of the previous day. She was a week over her due date. Because the labour was so slow they monitored her closely and things were ok until they realised the baby's head was stuck. They gave her an episiotomy and then they realised the baby had stopped breathing so delivered her with forceps. She stopped breathing for 2 mins and was resuscitated. She was in NICU all last night and they were worried about fits.
We've just heard that they have thankfully moved her to HDU today as she's not had any more fits and is alert and breathing well (she's been pulling the wires off that were stuck on to monitor her) they're running some tests to make sure there's no damage to her liver and that everything else is working well.We're all feeling more positive now. Last night when we heard was so scary.BIL and SIL were finally able to hold her this morning. BIL say he feels like he's been crying for 24 hours.

IDOC - I don't have any advice but hope dh's meeting went well and that an improved mood will mean you'll be able to talk properly about working things out.

CD meant to say yesterday glad DD1 op went well. Hope her eye stops hurting soon.

Brain melt so can't remember anything else.

Monkey boy has just rolled off his baby gym right across the floor while I typed this and pulled all the dvds off the shelf under the telly. It's started!

thank you tcmummy - great photos - he is so yummy

dippy glad dd is getting better

emmymummy - hope meeting went well and dh in a great mood

lesley - great news on eva rose - hoping she goes from strength to strength

sol - when dts had a rash is was a viral infection - no medication needed apart from calpol - which I am sure you by in bulk

KHIN - thinking of you and your delightful children. I am finding it hard and ds1 is older so 'easier' (just) any news from homestart?

maveta - glad you and ds are safe after that scary walk

just found my Lindam door bouncer but can't use it as arcitrave (sp?) in new house is curved so it won't work.

Any use to anyone? Before I put it on sale board.

I have just put on sale board a brand new set of tripp trapp cushions in red stripe to fit original highbacked chair.

Having a huge clearout of stuff not needed (the bouncy chairs are also going next week as they are nearly out of them )

Hi! Finally have the computer to myself as /DH has been hogging it for revision so haven't managed to keep up to date with you all.

Leaky, am so glad Eva is doing well, what an ordeal for your SIL & BIL .

KHIN have posted on your thread but have a big hug too, it can be a bloody grind with littlies.

IDOC, would couple counselling be OTT at all or something your DH would consider?

Lucewheel - that softplay is pretty good - let me know if you want to meet there sometime, E and B would have ball!

Well it's another glorious sunny day here - we've had some awesome weather this week, like summer . My sister came up yesterday & TBH it's been a huge help that she's had kids at the same time as me. It's made us very close and it's so useful to have the support of someone who totally understands how pants it is when you've been up with a baby then felt ratty with your toddler. She's fab - I'm so lucky.

hey liath can relate to that - dh keeps hogging pc for assignment work - so can only get on when he is working

you are so lucky having a sister in the same position, I have a younger bro who has an older fiance who has had her children

oooggs, although at least it means I can do a bit of reading in the evenings.....except that I tend to pass out on the sofa instead.

Is your DH finished with exams now?

Afternoon all

IDOC - I can kind of relate to your dh. Pre children I had a very pressurised job. I was the customer support manager in a financial call centre and very often had to deal with a lot of crap, as well as the corporate politics that went on. The last thing I ever felt like doing was talking to him about work as I knew there would be lot that he wouldn't understand (he's very clever, but never worked in an office, so didn't always "get" what I was talking about) And more often than not, it would feel like I was moaning. In a very long winded way, I'm trying to say that maybe he thinks he's helping by not talking to you about it as he knows you've got the lo to think about, and he's worried that he will add to your pressure. Does that make any sense?

W is now 17lb 5oz - he's put on nearly 2lb in 5 weeks! and has 2 bottom teeth. Question for bf - am going to a wedding in 2 weeks. Will be feeding W during the day, but am going to treat myself to several JD and coke in the night. How long will it be before I can bf again? Will have to remember to take pump to relieve the pressure (really looking forward to it - staying overnight and mum has said her and dad will have the boys in their room )

For all those lo waking in the night - W is doing it too. He's not hungry, but think his legs get so restless they wake him up, and then he wants to come into our bed. Maybe not a good habit, but I console myself with the fact this will be the last child we have. And besides, my body wouldn't know what hit it if I got more than 4 hrs sleep

that was longer than I thought

Re drinking runny :"Peak levels in the milk appear after 30 -90 minutes to reduce exposure of the baby to alcohol avoid breastfeeding for 2-3 hours after drinking."

liath - he has an assignment in by end of October and his last exam end of January then I think that is it on the H&S thingy.

But.....................

in September he started another 1 year course and is doing them paralel side by side

Thanks leaky - had visions of not being able to bf the day after. Don't intend to get too drunk, but never say never (although I haven't drunk in over a year)
Knowing me I'll have one and fall over

runny, I fed Joe the next day after Pesha led me astray last week and he didn't seem to suffer

hey ladies;

pleased little eva is on the mend leaky.

runny, i'm sure a few drinks wont do any harm... their are people that do all sorts of horrible things through pregnancy and whilst bf'ing... a couple of jd and cokes will help him sleep

Dp out on the lash tonight so I have pizza archers aqua and chocolate!!!

Leaky - positive news about Eva - fingers crossed she will be 100% OK now.

SOL yes deffo in for coffee & rant. Maybe was could just meet in Basingstoke in early Nov when B & E are at school. 30th Nov has been suggested for the SE meet-up on the other thread, but I can't make that date. We could have a break-off SE meet-up rebellion!

Well, guess what? DH's meeting went "very well". As per usual he was getting all stressed out for no reason. His boss is 100% behind him with respect to his awkward staff, and will support dh in whatever he plans to do with them. His comment to me was "cam we put this behind us now please?". Erm, no not really as I don't think a whole day of crying can easily be swept under the carpet. I know he won't feel like talking about it when he gets home, but he's gonna have to.

Thank you for your supportive comments on this, you are all stars

My tuppence for the day.

IDOC A man who talks. Nope sorry never met one if that helps to put things in perspective. I think its just part and parcel .

Leaky V pleased to hear the good news about Eva .

Runny I am fairly ashamed I have been completely leathered couple of occasions and T seems to have survived . All the more reason to be happy that he is now taking heaps of solids, bring on the wine. Aim to be completely given up by chrimbo so that I can make up for last years pittance .

T has just been stripped for his bath and I swear he is the most handsome baby on the planet .

Typos again .

And Hi "Pumpkin" xxx