May 2020 Babies

[MarshmallowsOnToast]

Still waiting for my little man to arrive but starting a thread ready. Can't wait to catch up with all the other May 20 mums.

Huge congratulations to those who have already met their little ones. It's been quite a scary time to face giving birth recently and you've all done amazingly.

@november90 I was the same! Up every hour, almost on the dot! Fingers crossed for you and for myself for a better sleep tonight!

Hi, hope you don’t mind me joining. Coralie was due 2 May but born a month early however I was in the Due in May group and the April threads have been so inactive in comparison.

As Coralie was premature, she has been weighed weekly by the health visitor. She is 7 weeks on Thursday and will be weighed again then but last Tuesday she was 7lbs6oz (she was born at 5lbs12.5oz but then lost weight in intensive care). My breastfeeding journey has been difficult. We got off to a slow start because I couldn’t feed her for 4 days while she was too poorly. Once she moved from high dependency to special care, things improved but we had to wean her off a feeding tube and she then lost weight just breastfeeding. In the end, I agreed to formula top ups just to get us out of there.

At home I’ve continued to struggle as I then got mastitis. I’m trying to exclusively breastfeed in the day but by 9pm my nipples hurt so much and I just can’t keep up with her feeding demands. I now go to bed between 9pm and midnight just to get some undisturbed sleep and my husband bottle feeds her expressed breast milk and formula. At midnight I then pump and then combi feed during the early hours (mix of breast then bottle of the milk I expressed earlier). I put so much pressure on myself to exclusively breastfeed and have felt really down and upset about it. I’d feed her for hours and she wouldn’t settle then I’d give in and get a bottle which she’d gulp down in about ten mins and then settle into a lovely deep sleep! I found it so disheartening! But I’m slowly coming to realise that a well fed baby is a happy baby and so I’ve decided to stick with breastfeeding during the day and then combi feeding at night. I just don’t feel like I can do any more and have slowly come to terms with that. Anyone else feeling or have felt pressure with feeding?

@Sunshine8888 I'm in the "April but should have been May" club too

It's definitely easy to put so much pressure on yourself when it comes to breastfeeding. But the way the NHS do it - all the promotion but not much in the way of support - makes it so hard for new mums to reach their breastfeeding goals, especially when they've had a rough start like you have. But sounds like you're doing an amazing job! Combi feeding is a good compromise for many people.

It's common for newborns to be really fussy though (especially in the evening), often feeding frequently or constantly for several hours, so it might seem like you haven't got enough milk and she's starving. That's not the case though (if she's otherwise having wet nappies and gaining weight), and it's due to the design of bottle teats that your baby will gulp the formula down (sucking is a reflex and they don't have the possibility of sucking without extracting milk like when at the breast). The deep sleep that follows is more like a "food coma" from eating too much, as well as the fact that formula takes longer to digest than breast milk. There's lots of great articles and resources on Kellymom.com if you want to have a look

As soon as I change a pooey nappy and get him settled again he does another poo. He is literally a poo machine. And 9 out of 10 times he pees on himself and clothes when I'm changing him and we are running out of clothes that fit.

@Delbelleber I found that after a week or so the dirty nappies settled down. My baby is 3 weeks old now and having a poo once every couple of days (totally normal for breastfed babies as breast milk is a complete food so there's not much waste). Maybe try a folded muslin on his tummy while you're changing him?

@Sunshine8888 another April but should have been May here too!
I told myself this time round I wouldn’t let myself get stressed out by breastfeeding. I combi fed my first son and I still feel guilty that I didn’t manage to exclusively feed him. But he’s been the most content, healthy boy so fed and happy is definitely the best thing.

We also had a rocky start this time round as Noah was poorly for the first 3 days and I couldn’t feed him. Since we’ve been home I have managed to establish feeding which I’m quite proud of, it’s hard going and last night I ended up in tears as I just didn’t have enough milk to satisfy him. So I gave him some formula but he ended up taking about 3 sips and falling asleep 🙄 He’s getting weighed this afternoon so really hoping he’s gained weight x

@Emmacb82 great achievement to establish feeding after baby was poorly

If he didn't want the formula though, it doesn't sound like it was a lack of milk? Was he generally fussy, feeding for a few minutes then pulling off and crying? And repeat for a few hours? Had that over here too and it's really normal

kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/

@AlmostAlwyn he was definitely acting hungry, chomping away on his dummy, stuffing his fists in his mouth and crying hysterically! But I know that cluster feeding is normal too so who knows. He either didn’t want the formula or he tired himself out but then woke an hour later and took another good breastfeed! Its all a learning curve isn’t it. Thanks for the link 😊

@Emmacb82 I've had similar behaviour here too - sucking really quickly (almost looks desperate!) then pulling off and crying. I switch sides and she does the same thing for a few minutes, switch sides, etc etc, repeat from 6pm to 10pm! I can see how it would be really easy to assume it was because I didn't have enough milk. It's not every night - last night she pretty much slept all evening. Hopefully she'll get over it soon!

@AlmostAlwyn, thanks, I’ve read what feels like every article under the sun but I just get too sore to keep up with her demand at night. I think it’s because she takes a very long time to feed due to her tiny mouth and being premature. I’m hoping she’ll start feeding more effectively as she gets bigger.

@Emmacb82, 🤞🏻 for weight gain. Coralie is being weighed again tomorrow (she’s had weekly weigh ins since she was born).

Awww girls I totally understand all the breast feeding struggles!
BF my first did NOT come naturally. I hated it. I feel looking back it spoilt those newborn days. I was in pain all the time, I kept getting thrush and he would only feed from one side! It was about 6 weeks when it just clicked and the. I continued until he was 17 months with no issues and I loved it! I used to top up with a bottle during the night. I'm not sure I'm whether it's did or didn't help as he was such a milk monster but it helped me!
Please look after yourselves girls and just keep reminding your selves how new all of this is for both of you! If you need to top up, then do it, even if your topping up more then you want. Milk is supply and demand so as long as you continue, when you drop the bottles your supply will still increase!
Also just have a think about what you fee is best for you BOTH. BF is amazing, but if it just doesn't work it isn't your fault!!!!

Marley is another milk monster. I don't even bother counting our feeds... he feeds well more then enough! I'm pretty soar right now but it's probably a lazy latch on my part.

I really feel for the ones struggling. Please don't guilt yourself, do what is right for you both! If you're struggling, baby probably is too ❤️

We are going ok here touch wood with breastfeeding. Although he feds a lot most days (like 20+ times some days). But he is gaining weight, and hasn't got the memo that breastfed babies supposedly poop less as Dh recorded 6 poopey nappies yesterday!!

I do want to introduce a small bottle with formula in daily though soon so Dh can take over if I need to go somewhere or do something at home, as atm he can be fed lots, then still want a feed 30-60 mins later potentially, so I couldn't leave him without an option to feed. Online seems to say wait 6 weeks, but then many say its too late and the refuse bottle, so I'm not sure. I might try a 2oz bottle from dh this weekend (he will be 3 weeks). Hopefully that daily will be enough he gets used to bottle, but not too much he refused breast. Any experience of this?

Please can I join? My little boy Reuben was born on 12.5.20 via planned csection (although I actually went into labour that morning: what were the chances!). He was 8lb 13oz at birth and three weeks early and is my third. He is breast fed and had regained his birth weight by day 5 (I always have a huge supply and have 98th centile children!). He’s an absolute dream but I’m feeling very very hormonal and weepy at day 8 and would love some people in the same boat to talk to congratulations on all your new arrivals

@Sunshine8888 I am still waiting for my little girl to arrive so can't speak from personal experience, but I have read that nipple shields can be really helpful if you have sore nipples - as a temporary thing while you recover from the soreness. Have you tried them? I have bought a couple just in case I need them.

I have also read that sore nipples can be a sign of the latch needing improvement - maybe getting a lactation specialist to assess the latch?

Just had Noah weighed and he’s gone from 6lbs 13 to 7lbs 11, I’m so thrilled.

Welcome @olivesandpecans sounds like you’re going really well. I had the hormonal days around the same time as you, it’s horrible but it should pass. I still have the odd wobble now and again but am coping much better than I did first time round. Someone’s always in here if you need to talk x

@woollycat, nipple shields have pros and cons. Too many cons for me (can lower milk supply and also not drain breast properly - as I had mastitis there’s no way I want to risk that again, it’s horrendous)!!

@november90, what did nipple thrush feel like? I don’t think I have it. I think soreness for me is from constant feeding. I can’t put her down in the day, she just wants to feed all the time. She also fusses in the evening and pulls on and off and chomps down which kills. I’m sure this is why they never recover as it happens for a period of time each day.

@emmacb82, that’s incredible weight gain, you must be thrilled 😁

Sorry meant to say the latch is fine and I’ve also had a tongue tie assessment

@Caspianberg, I was told that nipple confusion is a myth and an old fashioned view (by my midwife). I have friends who waited and their babies refused the bottle. Coralie has been combi fed since day 9 and she switches between breast and bottle easily

@Sunshine8888 it's when your nipples are really soar and itchy. If you had it your baby likely would too! She would either have a white coating on her tounge or little white spots in her mouth.

I never used a bottle with my first and then when I wanted to wean he would t take w bottle and has never ever had one 😰 nightmare!

@olivesandpecans hi! What a fab weight, Reuben sounds like he is doing brilliantly.

I am also on day 8 post partum with my second baby (George), recovery from birth has been so much easier this time round and I sailed past the baby blues on day 3/4 which I struggled with last time but today I feel so emotionally drained and keep crying and feeling frustrated/short tempered at the most ridiculous things. My poor 20 month old has been told off so many times today as I just have no patience and I feel horribly guilty now 😣 I feel like I have been a shouty hormonal mess all day! So you are not alone

@november90, I can’t see anything obvious on my nipples but they are really sore all the time. Coralie does have a white tongue sometimes but I assumed that was milk residue. I’m so confused. Perhaps it is thrush... the antibiotics I took for mastitis can cause it. I wonder if I need to go to the doctors 😬🤔

I was originally supposed to be in the July group but now been told I will deliver on the 28th of May with a Csection at 32 weeks with baby weighing in at about 3lbs 2oz because my placenta has stopped working properly feel so disappointed in myself xx

Morning all

Hope everyone had a good night.

@Courtney2020 - welcome! There is a few ladies that have had prem babies on here and they are all very helpful. It isn't your fault your placenta isn't working properly so don't go blaming yourself! The main thing is there is a plan of action for your baby to arrive as safely as possible ❤️

Did anyone have an episiotomy? If so how are you finding the recovery? I'm 2.5 weeks now and was hoping I would be back to normal by now 😂🙄 Xxx

Thanks for the welcome . Reuben was up most of the night - think a bit of colic possibly. I’m feeling a bit less emotional today and a bit more myself so hoping the hormones are settling. @Sunshine8888 when dc2 had thrush the white residue didn’t come off in her tongue. It was caused in her case by antibiotics she took, but we both had to be treated. Hope everyone has a good day

@Courtney2020 oh bless you, I'm so sorry that you're feeling like it's your fault! I know it must be so stressful to have that news, but it's not a result of you, I bet you've been working really hard cooking that baby up! How has the rest of your pregnancy been? Looking forward to hearing of your arrival ❤️❤️❤️