The March-ers 2019 - Baby Talk #1

[Angelmiracle]

Congratulations to all the mamas with their new babies 🌸

Now the fun really starts 😄

@toastfiend - baby boy - 28/01/2019
@TheWanderlust - Baby girl - Althea - 7lb6oz - 16/02/2019
@PurpleFlower1983 - Baby girl - Matilda - 17/02/2019
@Wineandchoccy - Baby girl - Lois - 6lb12oz - 19/02/2019
@Harley8888 - Baby boy- Logan - 7lb4oz - 01/03/2019

@CaseofEllen sounds like you have had a rough time . You will feel a lot worst about the situation due to hormones etc but don't be hard on yourself . You have battled so much already . Focus on getting better and just take one day at a time

@sheeni I know exactly what you mean . I can't settle when I'm not around rose which is hardly ever and I think that is why but even when I try sleep when she's sleeping I find I can't even settle . So so overwhelming. I am also constantly worried about her being upset or sad like I can't bare the thought of her crying because it upsets me ..I just want her to feel safe and comforted all the time

Update on our journey . Rose has ling periods of awake time which she did last night like 6pm till 11.30pm then slept in her crib till 2am . I then fed her and she fell back asleep but wouldn't go back in her crib so she slept on me 2 till 7 just waking for feeds which is the best sleep She's had over night. She was then awake till 2pm today and then had a 4hour sleep which is the longest she has ever slept in one period but I do think she is exhausting herself by staying awake all that time . I am going to a breastfeeding group tomorrow . Just to speak to other mum's see if that helps my mood x

Also I forgot to mention I used the haakaa before whilst I was feeding on the other side . I was engorged as I hadn't fed a good few hours and I managed to collect 80mls!!!! I was so surprised . It works really well . So wanted to ask how much do you know to give your LO when you have expressed?

So sorry @caseofEllen - glad your other half is being supportive.

Had terrible news here which is affecting my milk supply greatly, my mum was killed in a car accident last night. Trying to continue functioning but not doing so well on that front.

@sheeni on the caboo, once it's threaded through the rings it just stays like that, so I would say it is really difficult to get wrong. As long as your baby is over 7lb though you should be OK with other options. I love our connecta too when they are big enough.

@CaseofEllen I also had to have an emergency section due to infection they couldn't find and then baby had an infection so they sent her for lumbar punctures. Tried 3 times but failed on each so we had to stay in 7 nights. It's so horrid! I can't even imagine how you're feeling having to be re admitted.
I know how you feel about feeling like you've missed out on a lot. The pain while feeding is horrid. I feel whipped out just changing a nappy and I feel like I have the flu continuously.
Are you still in hospital?
It's a lot you've been through and I wish you the speediest Of recovery's! 

@SquirtlesMumAgain I am so sorry to hear about your mum! Deepest sympathy to you and your family! We are all here for you

@SquirtlesMumAgain oh I’m so sorry to hear your awful news. What an awful shock hugs xxx

@SquirtlesMumAgain that's utterly horrific and I'm so so sorry. We're all here for you if you need to talk xx

@SquirtlesMumAgain I am so deeply sorry to hear about your mum. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it must be to be faced with such a shocking loss, especially while dealing with a newborn too. Lots of love to you. As @MistakenHoliday said, we are all here for you xxx

Firstly @squirtlesmumagain I'm really sorry, that must be incredibly hard for you and your family. Have you got support beyond your immediate family, such as friends, who can take your kids for a while whilst you do what you need to do?

@acaseofellen wow that sounds hard going, and as much as you think you're missing out.. you won't be and it's more important longer term that you get better. Also know how scary seizures can be, my first was in the street on the way home from work... It's a major worry for everyone. Glad they've established what caused it, will it be a longer term impact following the epidural issue or do they think it's a one off?

@jenlou1992 go you!! 80ml is amazing!! We started out giving 50ml and then have now progressed to 100ml as he's a greedy pig. He is nearly 6 weeks though so you may want to give less initially.

You can't over feed breast milk apparently so it's just trial and error. Do you have some bottles so that your partner could feed it to Rose and give you some time to sleep? We've got into a routine now of my husband giving the late night feed of formula around 10pm and then depending on how tired I am/how hungry baby is he might also give a bottle of expressed milk during the evening too. I found the breast feeding group useful, it was mostly just chatting to the counselors rather than other mums as it was raining on the day I went but even then it's useful to get support to see if there anything you could do differently, and for affirmation that you're doing ok.

@cardboard33 thanks will go to the group tomorrow and see what they suggest ..Rose has been awake since 6pm and not off the boob since 7pm . HV said she will be going through a growth spurt so to expect bad days . I know I'm going to be up all night and it just makes me want to cry . My DP has had surgery on his finger today and it's all strapped up so he's limited in what he can do .

@SquirtlesMumAgain I am so so sorry, please take all the support you can get. It must be incredibly difficult for you all! We are all here for you xx

Thanks for kind words everyone, not sure if it's long term but hoping not. They will look at blood patch in 4 weeks if not better. Going to discuss MRI with midwife tomorrow as want to make sure it's not a spinal infection.

How does everyone manage to sleep when baby is sleeping? I find it so difficult, he's quite loud and moves his legs around a lot and I wake up at every noise and movement to check on him. He sleeps for 2/3 hours at a time but because I'm so worried I end up getting so little sleep anyway! DP has offered to swap sides so he can keep an eye on him as he knows I wake up with every noise/movement but I'm reluctant because I think I'd just lay there worrying still

I think you do start to find that easier @caseofEllen (it is definitely easier this time than last!) Sleep when you can, you need it, even if you can grab extra during the "day" when DP is around.

Thank you for all your kind words and support. Just utter disbelief and emotional turmoil. I am glad she met and had 5 days with DD and I got a few pictures. Don't even know how to tell DS yet

@jenlou1992 how is it going? You might find that if you introduce a dummy after the growth spurt that she has less breast time as she just wants to suck rather than to feed. We also have a v sucky and needy baby and the dummy has meant I can sleep better. Your partner can still do stuff despite the surgery though, like he can give a bottle with his good arm and just support Rose with his bad arm if it's literally his finger. Ultimately if you'd had surgery to your finger I assume you'd still be doing something so he should be the same. Does this mean he's not going to work, btw? As if so give him the bottle and Rose for a few hours, leave and get some sleep. They'll both survive.

@caseofellen if they do do an MRI depending on how they do it (like if they use contrast dye) then you won't be able to breast feed for a few days until it's out of your system (if this is how you're feeding) so ask them about that. I've got my first one post conception next week and we've been stocking up the freezer with frozen milk and then will top up with formula. It's going to be so so so sad dumping it all in the sink, but needs must I guess!

Feeling like such s bad mum. Iv been pulling her nappies up to high which has been causing deep indent marks in her legs. They look so sore. I feel horrific that Iv caused her to have them. Iv cried because of it. I just feel Iv let her down and what else will I do to hurt her. Being a mum is hard

@shiny888 are you sure they're indents from being too high? I did the same thing and felt awful because his skin looked raw and was all peeling - even with using Bepanthen - showed the midwives one visit and they said it's absolutely fine, their skin is just so soft at first that anywhere fleshy is going to get marks and the peeling skin was just the normal new born shedding.

@shiny888 are you sure they are sore? DS has indents/marks where the leg elastic of the nappy goes too. If I put the nappy on any more loosely he would just leak. Next time you put a nappy on, try just putting your little finger in where you think the indents are being caused. If you can get your finger in easily then it is most likely fine. And stop beating yourself up! You are a good mum, doing your best and learning as you go, like all of us.

@Squirtlesmumagain I am so glad your mum was able to meet your baby. What precious memories that will have given you. I hope you will be able to derive some comfort from it.

@CaseofEllen i am sorry you have had such a distressing time. Fingers crossed it was a one-off x

I'm feeling good tonight because I slept from 8.30pm till 11.45pm while DH cuddled the babe. I've only had 2 hours since then (and it is nearly 6am now!) but it's enough that I feel sane. Also just had a couple of great feeds in the cradle position. Can't wait to feel brave enough to go out. I've not done art galleries, shopping etc since DS1 was small enough to push around uncomplaining in a pram. It has struck me that DS1's nursery days can be adventure says for myself and DS2 while I am on maternity leave. Quite excited about being able to do 'me' things again, with baby in tow!

@SquirtlesMumAgain I think you just have to be honest with ds. I can’t imagine what you are going through and especially with it being ds birthday tomorrow as well.
We are all here to shout, cry and vent at if needed x

@squirtlesmumagain I’m so very sorry. Thinking of you and yours and here for you. X

@SquirtlesMumAgain I'm so sorry to hear your devastating news. I can't begin to imagine how you are feeling. I'm so glad your mum got to meet your baby. As others have said, we're here for whatever you need us for, crying, being angry. So sorry xx

@CaseofEllen also struggling to nap when the baby does. I'm a really light sleeper anyway so on hyper alert for any movement or sound. In the daytime he doesn't sleep much after his first feed so i have to use that time to do his washing, change steriliser fluid, wash bottles, sort dog out etc and feed myself but after all that he's usually awake and the rest of the day is hit and miss with naps so really struggling

Does anyone use a night light? Can't remember if I've asked this or not. The midwife initially told us that as its not pitch black in the womb to use a lpw light for bed when we couldn't get him to sleep in his crib upstairs. We have a gro light on but don't want this on forever and have noticed him staring at it when I'm trying to settle him. Its quite a dim
but cold blue coloured light and he's looking at the bulb bits which are quite bright. I did turn it off the other night and he didn't fuss but then got worried i wouldn't see if he'd been sick or if his blankets had gone over his head etc so put it back on. Does everyone else sleep in total darkness?

@melissa112 we have the groegg on and we have dimmer switches if we need light. And we have a little LED light for nappy changes. Try to keep it dim, with no lights on I can just about see as we only have blinds but just check her cheek for vomit or poke at her face until I can get her dummy back in.

@SquirtlesMumAgain I'm so sorry to hear your awful news. As others have said, I hope its some consolation that your mum got to meet your baby, you will always have those memories.

@BadBadBeans I tend to have to hold boob a little out of his way to feed so he can breathe well. It's a pain to not have any hands free but I don't mind during the day, just at night I try to use my phone while feeding to help keep myself awake. We managed a few cradle holds during the day yesterday and although I think latch could be better, we certainly managed which felt like an achievement. Glad you've managed the same since your consultant came and got some sleep too. Good idea to plan things to do with baby, enjoy your adventures, they'll help you feel better in yourself and definitely help you and baby to feel better together.

We saw the HV yesterday and baby has gained another 10oz this week. I mentioned to her about the pain I've been getting in my wrist and she told me to call my GP. They managed to get me an appointment half an hour later (can't ever see a doctor urgently when you need to, yet when I'd be happy to wait a few days, they manage it that soon!) And diagnosed tendonitis so I have an ibuprofen gel to apply 3 times a day. Feels like as soon as one medication has finished, I'm starting the next.

@melissa112 we just leave the hallway light on and the bedroom door open. Our curtains are blackout so it just lets a bit of light in so we can else's what we're doing for feeds ha

@melissa112 *can see what we're doing

@jenfur my wrist has been really hurting, think it’s the strain of holding/feeding/carrying baby.