March 2016 - quick, a new thread!

[Swearwolf]

Sorry for the terrible title, I saw the old thread was up to 996 posts and panicked!

Ooh don't I feel important

Happy birthdays time and q
Time have you tried a buckled carrier like a connecta for Calais to nap in or atleast to keep her calm ?

Happy birthday to Q, Time and Zach! Can't believe he's a year old already.

Time as you know from my thread on the sleep board I have been having a lot of problems getting DS to nap lately. Something that I have had limited success with (sometimes works, sometimes doesn't) is TV. I know a lot of people would probably frown upon young babies watching TV but frankly whatever works! I stick something calming on, usually Postman Pat or In the Night Garden, and sit with DS cuddled on my lap, held quite tightly, with his dummy and his teddy that he goes to sleep with. Sometimes he will doze off after 5 minutes or so. Other times he still fights it and he will watch the TV drowsily but only for about 10 minutes before his attention wanders. Even when he doesn't sleep, the little break seems to help calm him.

Just been hit with the overwhelming realisation that I'm back at work full time as of tomorrow. How on earth do you get past the deep sadness/guilty feelings? I feel like he's going to hate me forever when he grows up and knows that I've only seen him for an hour before bedtime most days.

Q I had this feeling too I cried all night the night before I started back at work and cried when I dropped him off in front of the childminder but now being back for 3 weeks it's got better. But id do anything to stay at home with him :( especially when he's been poorly. I hope it goes ok for you tomorrow and good luck!
I definitely appreciate the time I have with DS more now!!
I love the frozen sandwich idea (sorry can't remember who mentioned it) what a good idea!!

And happy birthday time & q

Happy Birthday Q!
Sadly not all fillings work. Salad won't survive. I've done it with ham & cheese, which are fine. Haven't tried anything else yet.

Good luck with the job! Do you know what? I don't feel guilty. (But then I do feel guilty about that!). I'm busy, I have no time to think about the children, who are with childcare professionals who love them and look after them as well as (probably better than) I do. I've never met a man that feels guilty about working, we've been conditioned to think this way. And frankly paying the mortgage is kind of a And we love the axissfix too!

Stories of climbing babies is terrifying! Fortunately there's no sign of movement from DS2 (I'm pretty sure he's forgotten how to roll front to back too!)

Rotten luck with the heating 1french. Hope your plumber can visit tomorrow.

Happy Birthday Time too!

Oops, accidentally pressed post mid-edit to the reply to Q. (Got a screechy, non-sleeping baby this evening)

Was saying the paying the mortgage is kind of an important thing for us! Providing that kind of home stability is worth a lot. And that's before you get on to the benefits of children growing up seeing mothers working and households being more equal as a result.

DS2 has been in full time childcare since September. He seems to have a whale of a time at both places. Doesn't seem to hate me! Seems to be happy all day and then ecstatic when I show up! Seems adequately attached (DSis is a psychologist, he seems to be doing the right things in terms of this clingy phase!).

Honestly, you'll be fine, and he'll be fine. And yes, it does make you appreciate the time together. And for me, more than that, I'm better at those times as you've had time away from the relentlessness of looking after your own children.

Happy birthday zach, wow 1 already! And happy birthday time and q. Sorry to hear about non napping time. Dd2 has dropped down to just one nap now, I've given up trying to get her to nap more. Its early to be only on one nap but she really will not go down before half 10/11 and then won't go down for a second nap in the afternoon so im just rolling with it.

This is my last week of mat leave q so I sympathise, back full time next week! I don't feel that guilty really but I do feel sad. I'd never want to be at home full time and I am looking forward to being back at work but I keep looking at dd2s little face and feeling sad that I'm going to leave her.

We've all had mega colds in the last week and dd2 is so full of mucus she's woken up twice in the last week and been sick. No temp though so I don't think its a sickness bug, just so much mucus.

She's also really focusing on fine motor skills and her pincer grip is amazing, much better than dd1 at this age (who was crawling up stairs at this point!) And its been good for encouraging her to self feed as we are doing blw. Last night we had veggie chilli and rice and she ate the whole thing all by herself. Unfortunately she woke at half 9 and vommed it all everywhere which was a bit gross

Q and time happy birthday for yesterday!

french I hope you have got some heating now.

Ugh, me and DS have got a tummy bug. Blergh! Thankfully it is just the bottom end (sorry for the tmi) as I have issues with vomiting, but it's still not nice. Actually, DS seems a lot better today and I feel absolutely fine now, I just have to keep dashing to the loo. Yesterday I felt awful. It's a bit of a shame as we are going to have to miss DS's sensory group tomorrow, and swimming on Friday to make sure that we are clear of symptoms for 48 hours, but what can you do! We are having a sofa day today but we are going to have to go and do something tomorrow in isolation as I'm going stir crazy, and DS is getting bored too, he likes going out. Maybe a nice walk in the fresh air.

Dotty I've come down with this bug too, DS hasn't got it yet fingers crossed but I had to have the day off work and FIL had DS from lunch time as I've been so bad. Lucky for my he isn't working at the moment.
My work have been as helpful as ever! NOT! But that's another issue.
Hope your first day back went well Q.

Really great day at the new job..much more confident now which is good.
Didnt wobble when doing the drop off but when I picked him up and they told me he'd had a few cries and looked confused once or twice I wished so much that I'd been there for him.

Get well soon Dotty and FTM. No D&V here but both DS and I are still fighting a stinking cold. I haven't tasted anything for days, my nose is so blocked up!

Good luck to those starting back at work next week. I have until mid January but today is officially the last day of my maternity leave! The rest is accrued holiday. Which is nice as it'll be paid. But it means going back feels so close now. I am looking forward to using my head again and I think once we're in the routine and DS is settled at nursery I won't feel guilty. But I will hate those first few weeks - it's a big upheaval and I've never coped well with change.

Brr it's been so cold here the last few days! Gorgeous and sunny though. Tomorrow is December 1st and you know what that means ... Christmas jumper season! I have two for DS and he will be wearing the first one tomorrow

Heating was sorted tue pm, only off for just under 3 days but I was chilled to my bones by the end and may have chewed out DH ☺️ for missing a call from the plumber who had tried to come 6h earlier than agreed just as I was doing the nursery run.

Great that your first day went well Q , it really makes a difference.

I've not felt guilty for leaving DD in nursery as they have much more stimulating activites than I can fit in at home and it is good to socialise too. I have felt sad though, and I nearly cried when I can out of my first (tough) day back at work and heard a baby crying.

We have a christmas jumper here too Me , unfortunately granny got a bit carried away when knitting and it woukd fit a 2 year old. My 3 year old niece could even squeeze into it!

Best wishes for all the tummy bugs and colds. DD's antibiotics have kicked in and I have my cheery baby back at last. Still waking at 12 and 3 which is zapping all my energy for commute/work but hopefully when she is fully better we can drop at least one.

Happy birthday zach, time flies!

Q I'm glad your first day went well. I'm sure after a couple of days DS will be absolutely fine, although I get exactly how you feel.

Me I was so excited to put DS in his Christmas jumper today! I didn't though because I was scared he might have a nappy explosion all over it. We are hopefully going to a Christmas fair at the weekend so he can wear it then. I was on the phone to work this morning trying to sort out shifts for when I go back in March. It's come round scarily quick, although I am looking forward to getting back into it too. But, then when I say that I feel guilty for looking forward to being at work and away from DS. When does the guilt ever stop?!

ftm I'm sorry you are poorly too, it's not nice at all. I think DS is getting over it now and hopefully I'm not too far behind him. Fingers crossed that your DS doesn't get it, it's good that your fil was able to have him for a bit. Good old supportive work!

Yay for Christmas jumpers too Dotty. Hope you enjoy your Christmas fayre tomorrow. One of my NCT group has sent us a hilarious photo of her DS on santa's lap at a Christmas fayre, screaming his head off while santa looked slightly uncomfortable

The last few days have been better for DS nap wise, still quite short but more of them at least.

We've got his nursery induction next week, where we will meet his key worker and go through all his routines etc, and arrange his settling in sessions. DS is going through a very clingy phase right now which I understand is completely normal at 9/10 months but it does concern me that it's not a great time for him to be starting nursery. Still it's 6 weeks away yet and an awful lot could have changed before then.

New car seat has arrived - I love it -how life has changed, excited about car seats ha.
Good luck with the nursery induction me Rory has done 2.5 days this week - 7:30-5:30 for 2 of those days. He's settled in really well, averaging 2 x 1 hour naps and eating 3 meals. But doesn't seem to want a bottle while he's there. The look on his face at pick up is just the best.

Aw glad nursery transition is going well q. Dd2 is having her settling in sessions in a week, hoping it goes well. I'm back at work Monday but dh is taking two weeks then I'm taking two weeks leave so she doesn't start till January 3rd.

Dd2s sleep has gone to pot this week, she keeps waking really early (9pm) and refusing to go back in her cot so we've been co sleeping which was fine but she's now started waking every 2 hours and only wanting boob. Apparently there is a sleep regression around now, and separation anxiety which i think might be the cause of it as she has gotten super clingy and whingey during the day. She was always such a chilled out baby but suddenly she's a massive whingey bum! Its driving me mad.

Hard week this week,
Dd naps have tottalled less than an hour in 3 days now :(
She's been awful. Crying, constant moaning .nothing placates her.
Grr. I've been trying 8 months to fix this and it's just hit rock bottom and is getting worse and worse.
I feel her first year has been nothing but a miserable time .its not something I'll enjoy looking back on and that makes me so sad :(

Dropped of the thread there, hi everyone! I haven't even been lurking, I missed a couple of days and have been putting off catching up as it would take too long... I'm a procrastinator. Now fully caught up

Well done to everyone back at work, good luck to everyone back soon. I've finally fully sorted my return to work, I've stretched my holiday as long as possible to take until mid February. And have finally found a childminder who can take them from Feb, so feeling much more relaxed about it.

Happy birthday to Zach, Q and Time! I can't believe our first baby is a year old... I still feel like I have a newborn!

S is having a grizzly and clingy week, she's sleeping badly and really unsettled. I think it might be teeth as she's ever so snotty and sad, she's got the bottom two but I wonder if the top ones are on the move. Terrible timing as it's my work Christmas dinner on Friday and I've already paid my deposit and I almost never go out! It's also in our nearest city, which is 45 minutes away on the bus so if DH can't settle her I can't even hurry back. It'll be his first time putting her to bed with a bottle of expressed milk, I thought about practicing but I haven't had a chance and am so rubbish at expressing I don't want to waste any. I will just tell him to just feed her up and if he really can't settle her just let her get up until I'm home.

S isn't crawling yet either, she's not 9 months until the 18th so one of the younger ones, but she's quite mobile - commando crawling and rolling super fast. She's getting into everything. Like someone said upthread, I think the big one's Lego will be the worst thing to keep away from her. I've bought a playpen but we don't really have space for it, it's a folding one but when it's out it takes up most of the room. And she's unimpressed with it.

Time, sorry you're feeling so down about it, please try not to think about it in those terms. I know you've had a harder time than most with her not napping, but in my experience that won't be what you remember from this year. You will, but it won't be the main thing. When it's all in the past and they're two, three, four years old your memories of this time will be heavily influenced by looking through photos of C, and you will mostly have photos of her smiling and looking gorgeous. And you'll scroll through them and think to yourself how sweet she was. And she'll move onto a new phase and you'll think oh, how I loved those times when she'd sit on the floor with me and we could have the tv on grownup programmes, or something similar. There will be something you'll look back on fondly, and that's what you'll remember. That's my experience of having a difficult one anyway, that's how it was for me with my DS.

Oh God, she won't go back to sleep!!!

time I agree with swear as they grow up the rose tinted specs come out and you remember their faces when you first gave them lemon, your joy when they learn to clap and the scowl on their face the first time they 'meet' Santa etc. In my memory Ds was a great baby but it wasn't until Dd came along that I really remembered having to rock him for 40mins to get him to sleep then carefully sticking him in his cot only for him to wake up and we'd start all over again! Strange how the brain pushes those things to the back.

Got my first KIT day at work today, normally I work in Essex but this is 4 hours of meetings in London so I'm joining the commuters for train/tube hell . Will no doubt be frazzled by the time I get there and I'm already not sure my brain will cope with concentrating for that long! Aah Bond Street at lunchtime this close to Christmas

Hope you KIT day went well mrse and the commute wasn't too horrific!

Back at work this week, today was my second day. All fine, almost scary how quickly I got into work mode. DH is off for the next two weeks looking after DD2 and she's been absolutely fine with him. To the point where I was selfishly a bit sad she didn't miss me more! He's not been great at getting her to drink milk - she's not refusing the cup he's just poorly timed feeds around naps etc. So I've ended up expressing more than she's drunk both days but at least i am building up my freezer stash. Just putting her to bed now and she's been on the boob for over 25 minutes so either she's desperately trying to get milk out after I've over pumped or she's stocking up on her boob comforting...

me that picture sounds hilarious! We didn't see Santa but they had some little fairground rides there and DS was absolutely enchanted by them. I hope the nursery induction goes well this week.

Q lol I will wax lyrical to anyone who listens about how much I love my car seat!

time I'm sorry you feel so sad about your DD's first year. I'm sure though that despite all the tough times you have had some lovely moments that you will treasure forever, and as time goes on you will be able to push all the not so good bits to the back. A bit like childbirth! (Haha she says who had the most hideous birth going!)

swear fingers crossed that you get to stay out for the whole of the work do! Poor baby hopefully the teeth make an appearance soon.

mrsells I hope the kit day was alright. I've got my first one on the 16th of January. Aaaahhhh!

marmite I'm glad going back to work has been ok, do you really get back into it that quickly? I'm so nervous about going back to work, a big part of those nerves is not being with DS for a whole 12 and a half hours a day, but I'm scared that I will have forgotten absolutely everything. I feel a bit like you do, what if he doesn't miss me at all?!?!

DS and I are over our tummy bug now thank goodness, that was not very fun. Poor DH came down with it over the weekend but he's on the mend now. Because of the tummy bug we had a pretty boring week last week, nothing exciting to report. Although, DS did make a jolly good attempt at pulling himself up yesterday. He was sitting in front of me and somehow got himself onto his knees, and then he pulled up into a stand on my arm, and I did nothing to help him! He did it twice. Bless him! I've been worrying a bit that he is behind (he's not I'm just silly) and then he did that it stopped my worrying and made me want my squishy newborn back!

Glad your DS is better Dotty. He doesn't sound behind at all if he's pulling himself up! At the baby groups we go to there is huge variation still, some babies this age are just sitting and others are almost walking.

marmite sounds like you have breezed into work again! I'm not sure my transition will be so smooth but hopefully it will.

DS's nursery visit was fine, he sat on my lap for two minutes and then got down and never looked back! Got stuck right in with the toys and other babies. I still felt like having a bit of a cry though!

In other exciting news, DS's first tooth is finally coming through! I thought it would never happen. It hasn't caused much drama, he hasn't been sleeping badly or grumpy. I only noticed it because he went for a chew on my finger and I realised there was something sharp in there biting me!