March 2016: the one where Indomitable gives birth...

[vroc81]

I hope I haven't duplicated a new March thread in my sleep deprived state.. Went to reply and found thread was full!..

Vroc been thinking the same thing re clothes. J was in a vest and baby grow, but yesterday and today I've swapped the gro for dungarees during the day. I put a very light blanket over him when we are out and about and go back to the grow for bedtime.

I wouldn't encourage the quacks to take your money for craniopathy woo-bunkum. (A couple of people suggested it to me after DS2 had the screamies last week. I read the Cochrane review that says there's no evidence to support it).

Carrying your baby won't spoil them or make a 'rod for your back'. Have you heard the idea of the 'fourth trimester'? I'll find a link... Oh, Knits has it!

ffaux's leaflet hinted at it with the idea that in the first 3 months you do whatever it takes to get babies to sleep. Cuddle them, carry them, co-sleep. Sleep is important for both of you and they're too young to form bad habits.

And YES to making the most of newborn cuddles, Q! This is the last time I plan on doing this, so DS2 is currently conked out on me (after not sleeping in the pram when we walked into town and back ).

DS1 would only sleep more than 35 minutes when he slept on me. I eventually gave in to it (it was the only way I could get a nap too!) He also fed to sleep every time. And both of these he eventually grew out of by himself (just after 12 months, I think).

DS2 (so far) won't feed to sleep (I find this bizarre), and will only nap on me or in the sling during the day. But sleeps well for a 5 week old when swaddled at night (after much pacing and rocking).

Regarding formula instructions - I don't know why the guidelines would be different but milk powder really is a wonderful growth medium for bacteria (sugars, vitamins, minerals, all powdery with a good oxygen supply and as soon as it's opened a good level of humidity!). And I get really grossed out by stomach bugs! So I'd definitely add hot water to it! (But that's easy for me to say...)

I'm hopeless when it comes to baby clothing (though coping better than with DS1). We went out this morning with DS2 in a vest & sleepsuit, started with a blanket on but quickly lost it. It's now 20C outside! (But he's asleep on me so we're inside). Last week we did the school run in snow, and now it's summer. I can't keep up!

I went to vote this morning with C in a light cardigan, sleepsuit and vest without a blanket in his buggy. The only summer clothes I have for him are 3-6 month size... good thing he's long!

S is a little furnace, I don't think I've ever put a vest under her babygrows even on cold days, just wrap her in blankets so I can take layers off as needed. Now she's going out in short sleeved bodysuits and a light muslin blanket - but it is warm here, expecting 30 degrees tomorrow, and its my birthday too :)

Time here is that sleep handout indom referred to, in case you missed it. S also sleeps on me a lot

S's reflux has been awful last couple of days, screaming and projectile vom at almost every feed! We go through about 10 muslins a day, countless bibs and at least 3 outfit changes though I just walk around in sick covered clothes now Its a right pain considering we're living in a US apartment where the washing machines are 3 floors down and you have to pay each time! But trying to practice mindfulness and enjoy the lovely moments when we have them. She's smiling more and more but never for the camera!

ffaux wheb in the house we have given up on Muslins, found them to be useless and instead bought a pack of hand towels which we use - much more absorbant and dp and I just have one on our shoulders at all times haha!

Ooh good tip thanks Q! Damn it just ordered a pile of muslins from M&S haha!

ffaux she is absolutely gorgeous! I don't know how you're coping with the washing, why do apartments in the US not have their own washing machines? Seems strange!

I love muslins, they're so nice and soft and versatile - I've got some really big ones that double up as blankets. But I can see that if you have a projectile vomiter they might not quite be enough!

I am so fed up of bleeding! My lochia went on for 6 weeks. I had two days after it stopped before my period started and lasted for a week. I then had a week's break and now my period is back again! I've gone back on the mini pill which probably explains it - I remember from being on it before that I had bleeding all over the place for the first couple of months after which it settled down and my periods more or less stopped, just the occasional bit of spotting every few months. Love the not having periods bit, hate the irregular bit though!

Vroc according to the monitor our room was 22 degrees tonight. Don't want DS to overheat so I opened the windows earlier and it's gone down to 21. Still seems a bit on the warm side for him though. If the gorgeous weather continues I might just dress him in a vest for bed. Tonight he's in a babygrow with no vest underneath and during the day he was in a vest and dungarees.

Lovely picture ffaux!

I'm another one who has no clue how to dress baby in this weather. DD1 was a winter baby so very different!

I've had a lovely day in the sun today but have come to bed feeling shit. Was doing my core exercises and thought I'd check my stomach muscle separation and 7 weeks post partum and my gap is still almost three fingers width which is really bad. I've been trying so hard to close the gap with gentle exercises so for it still to be so massive is so disheartening. I did ask the Dr at my six week check to check it and she didn't seem to think it was too bad but I may go back to the GP again to see if I can get a referal to a physio. I feel so awful and fat and disgusting. Met up with some mum friends today and everyone else looked normal and I still look pregnant because my stomach muscles are ruined. Feel so depressed about it.

Marmite mine are ruined too in fact I am really struggling with my self confidence. Losing 3 stone on top of the 8 I lost before getting pregnant has left me with horrible loose skin. I look like a deflated balloon eating biscuits doesn't help either you are not alone lovey.

Me those big muslins are fab. I bought a few off eBay and they're so handy. I'm seriously tempted to pinch one as it would make a lovely scarf for me

Ffaux gorgeous pic! M never smiles for the camera either....

M slept 10.30 - 5.30!! Hooray!! And mummy and daddy are going out tonight!! Nannie is babysitting. There will be lots of .

Tis good

marmite sorry you're feeling down about your muscles I'm sure you look fine but always worth a trip to the gp otherwise to get some help, all the HCP seem so obsessed with out mental health over anything else just tell them it's getting you down.

ffaux beautiful girl! R seems to have stopped smiling the minute the camera appears too! The washing machine thing is a pain I found it a pain when we lived out there and they wasn't with a baby and all its washing as well!

Snap paper 10:20 to 5:45!!! Bliss I woke at 12:30 and 5 and pumped but I don't mind that as I do it with my eyes closed! Have a good night and enjoy the wine!

Thanks for the clothing info, she slept without a vest last night and given the sleep she must have been happy so will keep playing it by ear..

C slept 11-1 in the swinging chair as she refused her cot - tried for three hours.
She then slept from 2-3 in the cot. Had a feed and then refused the cot again. She went back down at 5 in swinging chair and woke at 6:30.
I've had 5.5 hours broken sleep and I feel rough :(
I hate leaving her in the chair when I'm sleeping but what can I do? I need a bit of sleep. I can't sleep holding her and I'm not comfortable with co sleeping and tbh even her lying next to me she won't sleep.
We used white noise, dummy, swaddle but this didn't work. Every time the dummy dropped out (every minute) she would wake screaming.
C slept without a sleep suit and just vest and her swaddle me wrap. She will not sleep un swaddled and I've been trying for weeks to encourage it so I am a bit terrified with the warm weather coming up.
Ffaux- thanks for hand out. We haven't had one good night this week and tbh it's getting me down. Had a good old cry last night. I just want her going in her cot/basket because I'm scared as to what this is going to do to her back being placed in the chair for so long each day.

Those stretches of sleep sound like heaven guys. Well done babies! :)

Also a dummy does work ( sometimes) but it falls out every two/three minutes when she's thrashing from side to side? And she immediately wakes up.
I've tried Dr Browns and tommee tippee cherry ones. Neither she can keep in.

Morning all, sorry to those with body woes, I'm just a couple of pounds over my pre pregnancy weight but that's still probably over weight, I've never had a flat tummy so it doesn't really bother me that much. I do feel pretty unfit though and find bf and having two children rules out pretty much any hi impact exercise. I bought a fitbit wristband to encourage me to walk more but I don't think it tracks the steps accurately when I'm pushing the buggy. I walked for ages yesterday and it only counted just under 3 miles, I was really annoyed!

We didn't have a great night last night though better than some I'm sure. We seem to be back to feeding every 3 hours, not sure if its a growth spurt. Someone at a group I go to said they can get a reaction to one of the jabs 7-10 days after having it so we might be in that period.

Hope everyone enjoys the sunshine today.

It's an annoying when you feel you walk so far and it doesn't add up to what you were expecting.
I feel fat and frumpy to. I'm a stone over my pre pregnancy weight. I think I'm 10.5 stone now.
Dd fell asleep like this for 15 minutes. She woke up just now and stirred around and dropped back off? Does anyone else's baby do this?
I have my nan round today. Have to walk into town to meet her first though...
Now baby please stay asleep long enough for me to eat breakfast... Nope to late she's awake again :(

Body woes...

I don't feel quite so bad now

I shouted at c :( I feel terrible. But she just won't sleep and looks shattered her self :(
Phoned oh again in tears. It's making my life a living hell and I'm starting to resent my own child for it. Please just an hour to my self :(

Cassidy quite often squawks in her sleep then goes back, it's usually when she has wind. I know two people who have had poor sleepers who have paid for night nannies to stay at their house for one night so that could both get a good nights sleep, they both said it was worth the expense to recharge their batteries. I also had a friend who had a sleep consultant in who stayed a whole night watched what was happening and gave them strategies to deal with it at the same time, I think they probably have to be a bit older though for that to really work.

I'm sure we will all snap at our babes at some point, its tough so don't be too hard on yourself.

I really feel for you time, it must be so difficult when your baby is crying and can't stay asleep. It's totally understandable that you feel like shouting if you're not getting any time away from an upset baby.

Does she tend to calm down if you pick her up or will she continue to cry no matter what? My little one wakes regularly if I put him down to sleep (as in he's asleep for five minutes then cried to be picked up) but he's much happier and stops crying when I hold him. If Calais stops crying when you hold her then is it worth you just sitting in front of the tv for an hour or two with her in your arms? It might at least give you a break from the sound of crying? If she likes being held then could you try having her in a sling or baby carrier?

If you're seeing your nan today do you think she'd be able to look afte Calais for an hour or two so you have time to nap, or even just have that hour or two to yourself?

She just cries if I hold her. What more can I do. She's fed, clean and winded. If she won't sleep on me then surely her only choice is to cry on me :(
She's been awake since 6:30 all be it 20 minutes.
I'm lost. Utterly lost.
I can't expect my nan to look after her. She's nearly 90 it's just not fair.

I can't afford a nannie or carer either. We're struggling just to get rent together this month

This is us now.
Jesus I still look pregnant don't I :(

I think its a bad camera angle rather than a bump time, I went to have a shower an hour ago but am somehow still in my pj's and with a baby in a very similar position.

She looks peaceful.
Calais crying again.
I think I'm going to phone my boss Monday and go back to work and take my oh offer up of being a sahd. I'm miserable and at least if I go back to work I might start enjoying her instead of resenting her..
I need to sterilise bottles them fuck this I'm going out for a coffee even if I am skint

marmite i've a 3cm stomach muscle separation and was given physio referral, definately worth asking as I found the guidance really helpful and she was able to advise on exercise to avoid. Ecercises she gave were pelvic tilts (10, 2x a day), bridges (10, 2x a day, hold for 3) as well as simply pulling in tummy muscles (20, 5x a day) on top of usual pelvic floor. GP thinks main gap much the same after 3 weeks of exercises but will get reassessment with physio next week. She measured in 3 places with gap varying from 1.5cm to 3cm so hope there is some improvement. I look little different from pre pregnancy shape - until I relax tummy muscles and the muffin top appears...

time my OH is going to be a sahd from October, it has worked really well for friends. It will be hard to leave her but so few dads get the opportunity for so much time with their babies It has made sense for us as it also works out financially.

Sounds like you're doing everything you can time, it must be exhausting for you. You've probably tried all this already, but just trying to think of things that have helped us...

• walking around holding baby and rocking them
• talking to baby (I talk absolute nonsense to mine but it seems to calm him when he's upset)
• white noise
• putting a piece of your clothing near to where baby is sleeping (they recognise mum partly by smell so they find it comforting)
• using a sling

And you don't still look pregnant! I was told it takes 6 months on average to get back to pre-pregnancy weight so I figure there's plenty of time to worry about that later!

You look just like me time! I'm about a stone and a half over my highest comfortable weight, and two stone over what I used to be. It does drop off eventually with all the walking, I think I'm just extra gutted this time as I came out of my last pregnancy lighter than when I started, then lost more in the first couple of weeks. I won't say I was smug, but... yeah I totally was. This time I'm 10 stone 10 and a large 12, which is too much for my small frame and height really. Like others I've never had a flat stomach, but I'm generally bigger than I should be.

I also don't think my stomach muscles are going back together marmite. My buggyfit instructor from my last maternity leave does special workshops to correct it, you pay for a block of sessions but it's a group thing I think. Could that be worth looking into if you can't get anywhere with the nhs?

Our sleep hasn't been too bad, two wake ups usually, but I'm shattered. Really struggled to get up this morning, especially since the baby was snoozing happily. But getting up at half six with ds is the only chance I have to have a shower and make tea before the school run.

time, sorry you're having such a rough time. I say if she sleeps in the swing let her, a few hours at a time with breaks in between can't do any damage surely? It sounds like you don't have any spare cash at the moment but just in case, tiny love do a baby swing that lays flat that could be worth a try - maybe you could find one on eBay.

S just screamed all the way to school and back! My own fault - she was sleepy this morning, I usually feed her before we leave the house just after 8, but she had one quick feed at half 7 and went to sleep and I let her, I should have woken her up to take the other side before I left. Lesson learnt!