March 2016: the one where Indomitable gives birth...

[vroc81]

I hope I haven't duplicated a new March thread in my sleep deprived state.. Went to reply and found thread was full!..

Hi all.

Am shattered! My sweet baby girl had DH and I at 4.00 am. It was 5.00 am before I got back to bed. DH went to change her nappy and she pooed everywhere. 3 nappies, a whole pack of wipes and a complete change layer we finally got her down to feed.

I'm considering going for a nap. Especially as she is asleep!

Wow faux and Doc from what you have said I think lasting this long with your regimes you've done amazing, sounds exhausting so can't begin to imagine the reality?!

We're still bfing here but in all honestly I don't think either me or DS are enjoying it so much. He's started faffing about, putting his hands in the way and generally messing about at most feeds?! I laid down the gauntlet with DP yesterday (after a particularly crappy day out with DS) and prepared a formula bottle whilst I disappeared for a bath....only for DS to then sleep solidly from 7.30 to 3.30. completely unheard of and bloody typical!!

Still wanting to make a massive effort with introducing the bottle this week but DS has his jabs this morning so in 2 minds?! One part of me thinks it's mean as he will already be out of sorts, but the other part thinks he is comforted by feeding from me at the moment so crack on whilst he's upset with himself anyway?!

Had wanted to see the HV today to see if they had any suggestions about why DS is so unsettled all of the time but didn't get out of the Drs in time.

Jabs now done and DS so far has slept quite a bit since...daren't touch/ move him. Waiting for the 6 hour point which is when the fever apparently peaks...poor souls...but far better than not being immunised and catching something I guess?!

Sorry you had another bad night time but you have mentioned before how your DH can settle your DD so much better than you...have you taken at least a little bit of reassurance from that it's obviously not the case if it was his turn last night?!

Omg paper why on earth wouldn't you??? I've just sent ds for a nap in the hope that I can have one too. Last night wasn't that bad but I'm really shattered too, I think I might end up nodding off on the sofa

The baby fug has made me more and more disorganised and forgetful. I forgot about a playdate for ds this afternoon, only remembered when she texted to postpone (phew), and only remembered the health visitor was coming when she phoned to postpone (phew again). I didn't insure my old car which I was trying to sell and is currently stored at my in-laws as I was going to sorn it, but forgot and got a fine dh was so furious, he barely spoke to me all day yesterday. On the whole I feel like I'm coping so well with both and the baby is so much easier than I found ds, but I feel like it might all come down around me at any moment. I'm a bit prone to anxiety so maybe I'm imagining it.

Paper we had a poo like that this morning. It went through his vest and babygrow on to the sheet. When I stripped him off it was EVERYWHERE. I was amazed! It had come all out the top of his nappy on to his belly and back, out the sides on to his legs, omg it was disgusting. He'd been saving it up for 2 days ... complete outfit change, bed sheet change and almost a whole packet of wipes for us too!

Other people using sleeping bags, what do you dress your babies in? DS has a 2.5 tog one from John Lewis, our bedroom is usually around 18-20 at night. The guidelines for Gro bags which I assume are more or less the same say that he should be in a long sleeved vest but I've had him in a short sleeved vest and sleep suit. He doesn't feel hot when I get him up - I've felt his back and chest and he's warm but not too hot. I don't understand why they apparently don't need anything on their legs and feet? If I was sleeping in a sleeping bag I'd still wear bottoms.

Hello folks,
I've gone and done a two day thread catch up and forgotten who said what to reply 😕

I've been feeling a bit more down than up and down at the moment of you see what I mean. I think it's a mixture of absolutely loathing my body (and being constantly reminded of DSis August wedding and bridesmaids dresses) and lack of sleep.
Another weird thought keeps popping in my head is resented G for taking up DP - Totally lunacy! Me and DP used to be very touchy feely, handholding and sofa cuddles, but now that one of us is always holding/feeding G I feel so left out when it's DP doing the holding. Gah, I dunno.

With all the feeding talk further up thread, I think I made a right pigs ear of it. BF with shields for three days, then pumped for two weeks, then back to BF and now trying pumped and BF so I can leave the house so DP can give bottles again which he really missed. I really really want to ditch the shields but G can only get latched on when the boob group lady does it. As soon as I'm home and trying there is tears/screaming/milk over all of us!
Poppins yes to the fidgety feeders. G also scratches whatever he can reach, so both our faces and my boobs. He keeps gulping air and painfully choking, it's so shit. 😣

Oosh, this has turned into a right pity rant! Sorry!

Anyone in Yorkshire hear the Typhoon jet last night? I absolutely crapped myself. I thought a bomb had gone off.

Love hearing all the poonami takes. G seems to be a little and often guy but I am waiting for it to be our turn to have it so bad I end up sticking his tush under the tap 😄

Suz can you appeal? I'm so sure I've heard of someone managing to dodge the fine when they showed proof they had gotten it SORN within a certain time. And there's no need for your DH to be such a nob about it 🍰☕️ For you.

Right. Off to pick up DP and trip to ASDA (sarcastic woo.)

Afternoon,

I'm currently pacing the hallway with DS2 in the ring sling. He apparently only sleeps when being carried (during the day. So far).

Sympathy & solidarity to those who've endured the poonamis!

Me, I think there's a lot of variation in how warm babies are and what they need to be wearing. Both my DSs are warm people, but so is DH. I, however, can get hypothermia in 22'C! So DS2 is currently wearing a sleepsuit with no vest, and his swaddle pod which is t-shirt material. Our bedroom is usually very warm though (new-ish house that seems to re-radiate heat out of the walls after sunset). If he seems chilly at the 4am feed I pop a cellular blanket over him (and he's usually too hot again by 6am).

Oh, yes to fidgety feeding. DS2 often gets in a right screamy mess pushing himself away with his arms or grabbing my nipple, or just getting hands in the way. If I can get his arms out of the way (by his sides works best, and then hold him tight so they can't come up again) I discovered that he'll calm down with my little finger in his mouth (something about touching the roof of his mouth & bottom lip simultaneously) and then I can do the old switcheroo onto a boob.

He also still gulps and delatches to complain about fast flow, so I've learned to be ready with a muslin to stop him being hosed down by it (or flashing boob when out!).

I read about the jets! I bet it was terrifying, but I love that kind of thing!

he's still not asleep, but starts screeching if I so much as pause. Need him to settle down so I can sit down!

This is the wrong carrier for this. Can't wait till he's big enough for the ergo...

indom have you tried flipping the rails on you ring sling. Putting a twist in the material internationally before you thread it. Any aussie friend showed me how to do it and I find it distributes the weight much more evenly and brings the material away from your neck more.

On the poo front eddy was previously going like clockwork at 4 pm everyday but since Saturday started going countless times a day. Going through so many nappies!

Mines got a padded shoulder, dobby, and I wear it over my shoulder rather than near my neck. It was just getting a bit heavy after much pacing, and carrying him in the wrap earlier too. (And I'm out of practice and weak as anything at the moment!)

Oh I'm sorry you are feeling down, it's such a huge transition having a baby and the realisation that life is different and always will be. Is there a way you can all snuggle up together? Things will get better, especially when our babies have a bed time and we get evenings to ourselves again.

My body is bleurgh too and I've never been an exerciser but I'm feeling like I should be doing something. I don't think my walking is enough to cancel out the biscuits I'm eating I just tried to do that test to see if my stomach muscles had knitted together. Well even with a you tube video I couldn't figure anything out. Thought I might start to do some sit ups if they had but I don't know if I should. Wondering if the GP will check for me at my 6 9 week by the time we have our appt check?

I might just eat another biscuit now...

Thanks all for the support yesterday re. the problems with exclusive BF doc, me, purple, vroc it's good to hear positive stories. I can't believe something that's supposed to be so natural seems so hard to achieve for so many. I have felt so much more relaxed these last couple of days since I gave up the extra pumping. It's hard not to be envious of all the mums in my group who are BFing so effortlessly. One even has a problem with oversupply and an overactive letdown but it doesn't sound like that's much fun either even though I'm still really jealous

Those on formula have you found a good system or gadgets for dealing with bottle prep/warming and washing etc? Just trying to streamline the process. How about which type of formula? Someone in my group actually gets UK formula shipped to US as she says the standards we are held to are higher, think she uses HIPP?

thanks for the jab info mrsE

suz for you - I've been there too! I failed my US driving test (even though i've been driving at home for 15+ years!) as I stupidly took it 4 weeks postpartum, then I didn't move the car from a temporary no parking zone as I didn't see the signs, and car got towed - it cost $200 in fees and fines to get it back! DH wasn't happy . I think we have a good excuse though

oh for you too! The transition is so hard isn't it

We have one giant poo every 2 days here so it's almost always a poonami! It happened when we were in a shopping centre yesterday and I changed her in the loo - before I could stop her, her hands were in the poo and it was so hard to stop them going into her mouth, I put mittens on her but they went in her mouth as well! She also peed and sicked whilst on the mat, and screamed her head off at the sound of the hand drier. Total nightmare, I was really pissed off thats men's loo don't have baby changing facilities as DH was waiting happily outside

Also wanted to say beaut still thinking of you

Ffaux That sounds like one heck of a poonami. These children are SMALL where does it all come from??

Purple I am with you on the body issues, my tummy is horrific... it's just a baggy saggy mess. DH has dug out my exercise DVD's so I am planning on doing one a day I may have to put Martha in the cupboard under the stairs while I do them I've got hen do's and weddings to go to this year and I want to look good as opposed to Mrs Jelly Belly.

Dobby Am thinking of buying shares in pampers. Thank goodness they are on offer in Tesco

Am nodding off....M just finished her feed FX I get another few hours sleep!

Ffaux we have a microwave steam steriliser for bottles which is really easy and quick. E has 4oz at the moment so I keep 2oz of boiled water in the fridge and then put two boiled in the bottle to mix the powder. This is because new guidelines here say the powder must be sterilised with water that is 70deg. Then I mix my chilled water to this and run the bottle under the tap for a minute or so.

At night I'm much more lax because in the old days seven years ago you were able to add powder to cooled boiled water so I take a bottle of water to bed with me and powder in a tommee tippee pot and mix them in. This is actually the wrong way to do it now and I wouldn't admit it to the health visitor but as I would be flamed. I'm sure the others have much simpler and proper ways for night feeding and will be better able to advise you.

Ffaux, we do pretty much the same as Purple but I have a Perfect Prep machine which essentially does the same thing during the day. You could have a flask of hot water at night just to sterilise the powder and then top up with cold. I add 2 ounces of hot, add powder, then top with cold. On a 6 ounce bottle that gives a perfect temperature.

Another one here with a flabby, wobbly tummy. I've started doing exercise videos off of YouTube. Some are pretty good.

Ffaux I also have a perfect prep machine, it's wonderful. I do get up and go downstairs at night to use it, maybe I should bring cooled water and powder to bed too - technically you're supposed to sterilise the powder with hot water but like Purple most people I know just use cooled boiled water when they're out and about. I use the ready made bottles when we're out as it seems easier than messing around with containers of powder, but they are more expensive - 80p a bottle.

For sterilising we have a tommee tippee electric steriliser which sits on the side. It takes 6 bottles at once so it only needs running once a day. I also keep in a few of those microwave bags so that if DS chucks all his dummies on the floor etc I can sterilise them quickly without having to run the big one half empty.

DS has just done his fourth night in a row of sleeping 8/8.30pm - 5/5.30am! I feel almost human again! Even though the second half of his sleep is always very noisy so I don't sleep that well. I am trying to work out how to improve it for him. Last night I dressed him in one less layer (sleep suit + sleeping bag but no vest) and reduced the incline of his Moses basket a bit to stop him ending up at the bottom half way through the night. Both things seemed to help as he wasn't quite as noisy last night.

Happy Star Wars day! May the 4th be with you!

Me good sleeping!! We had 10 - 4 sleep last night!! I had to pump at midnight but I can do that with one eye closed and go back to sleep quickly... Second night of a 6 hour stretch although the one before was 8 - 2 but we have been awake virtually all day for those two days with an increasingly grumpier baby as the day goes on so not sure about the trade off...

ohwool sorry your feeling down hope you've had an opportunity over the long weekend to have a quick sofa snuggle and had some luck with the feeding.

ffaux that sounds like a nightmare poonami although it did make me smile a little bit as R worst one to date was in Waitrose.. A full clothes change..

Love the outfit vroc!

Congrats to those of you getting longer stretches of sleep. E has settled into a pattern of going down at around 10, sleeping three hours, then two, then two, pretty much on the dot so nights are very predictable. She's going down straight away after her feed though so I'm feeling fine about it at the moment. I've always been someone who copes well on little sleep so just dealing with it. Also DD1 woke 2-3 hourly until she was at least 6 months old so think I've been sleep trained already haha 😂 with DD1 I tried loads of things and nothing worked so just going with the flow this time.

Jealous of the good stretches.
C had a terrible night. Up every hour. Not even hungry except at 1 and 4 just needed constant re settling. Damn it 11 weeks and it's getting worse and hArder not easier :(.
Didn't sleep in the day yesterday except for little stretches of 20 minutes at a time after waking at 12am. She then screamed so loudly at 4pm from tiredness I went for a two hour walk and the second the pram moved outside she was out like a light.
I can't spend anytime inside at all without it being a living nightmare. I told my oh I may as well walk around the block and just come in for feeding times.
On top of that she's not eating enough she has gone from 2nd centile to 0.4 I'm just under two weeks and I cant make her eat but the health visitors gave me a plan as what to do I said "but I can't force her to take x amount every three hours" she just won't. They said I have to do it. How? How do I force feed a baby itd just not possible.

My mil and two sil all commentd the other day as well that we have the hardest and unhappiest baby they've ever met. I just feel so shit. She wasn't even crying in pain last night just kept waking up.

Regarding formula. We have perfect prep at home and use cooled boiled water when out as I can't be asked with the faffing around and pre made is to expensive

Time I just wanted to send some virtual hugs. I can't believe your mil and sil said that. I'm sure Calais isn't the unhappiest baby ever, even though she is unsettled. I guess she came into the world a bit too soon for her and so she still adjusting. I don't have much advice for feeding but I agree you can't force feed a baby. E will not take more than she wants, she closes her mouth and wriggles. If I get the milk in she spits it out and looks at me like I'm feeding poison.

Can you ask for a HV to watch he feed? Could they come for a home visit around feed time and then maybe they can show you what they would do differently. Or can you keep trying little and often, it's a pain with making the bottles but would she maybe take smaller amounts more often? I don't know if that's good advice so ignore me if its crap

Vroc love the Star Wars outfit. I would put Evie in hers but we are going out and people will mistake her for a boy again, had this yesterday when she was wearing turquoise
I'm not a lover of pink for girls and blue for boys but I got bored correcting people "she is 7 weeks" polite smile.

Thank you.
Yeah my mil has had four babies and commented how she never had a bad night with any grr just what I wanted to hear.
They tell me I should be doing all the night feeds as oh has to work but when I say I can't sleep during the day they say "sleep when baby sleeps" no! She doesn't sleep unless I'm out. I can't sleep waking the pram can I! She's all ready awake again after just fifteen minutes.
Thanks for the feeding advice. It's just horible. She's not even thriving in that respect anymore. I feel so useless .
Good idea to ask to observe feed though I will mention that

Oh Time I really feel for you. DS will often only sleep during the day now if he's being pushed in his pram or in the car, so I sympathise with the sleep when the baby sleeps thing - impossible! Have you managed to get her to take a dummy? It really helps DS to settle.

You are not useless and don't let anyone especially mil and sil make you feel it. Calais was 5 weeks early wasn't she? So really she's only 6 weeks corrected and still finding her way. It's nothing you are doing wrong:

vroc love the outfit!

Purple someone asked how old "she" was about DS the other day when he was dressed in blue corduroy trousers and a rugby shirt - definitely a boy look! People are strange ..:

Feel for you time and I guarantee out of her 4 children your mil did have bad nights, but she will have forgotten about them. My mil said her 4 were all good sleepers etc but then now and again wilk slip up and say she didn't sleep for 3 days with one of them, makes you feel like a little win wheb you realise that the perfection they talk about is just looking back wit rose tinted glasses!
Went for lunch with my mum yesterday - R screamed as soon as my food arrived, it was really hot where we were and he was going for a good 15 mins, took him outside and instantly fell asleep. Some elderly lady then came over and actually said to me that she was 'ready to take her off you and font on the hospital I thought something was wrong with her' nope HE was just too warm because the heating was on and all the doors were closed on a day that was 17 degrees outside!! Grrrrrrr! He was wearing a navy blue sleepsuit with a rocket on the front haha.

**Go to the hospital

Take her off you and go to hospital!!! Q I'm feeling on your behalf. What a cheek!

Time I don't think I have ever slept in the day. Crazy of your ils to suggest it. Even with you OH working, could he not let you sleep say from 7-12 to give you a block of sleep? He would still have a reasonable sleep too then. Not much later than most people's bed times.

J has just had his jabs and I'm so annoyed because I missed them. I thought it was just jabs but we had to have a HV weigh and measure, then a doctors check, then the jabs. The appt was well over an hour and I had to leave early to pick DS up from nursery. Luckily DP was with me to take J in but I really wanted to be there.