October 2014 // thread 6 // baby's new year resolution is to sleep more?!

[sazzlehopes]

I've gone to bed at 8.30 ish every night for a week now. It's awful really, I know i should be spending time with DH but if I hang out downstairs I just fall asleep on the sofa anyway. At least if I go up early I don't completely wake up when DH brings A to bed.

Haha sazzle great minds i indulged in a wee glass of red last night, as both kids sleeping for 8:00pm

I need to feed dd2 no later than 7pm as she deffo just needs her bed about half 7. Ideally i would like her last feed to be about 10.00pm as she is still waking between 2/3 am for a feed but she does go straight back down mostly with no fuss, so i cant really complain . I should go to sleep when she does but i like to watch my guilty pleasure in peace whilst folding the never ending laundry

Thats nice you booked the christening munday

Is the 2/3 am feed the only night feed Stigz? That sounds pretty good if so.

I slept between 5am and 6.40am last night. She's doing my head in at the moment - even her happy squeals are going right through me. I think general tiredness and stress about the sleep stuff is being exacerbated by being on holiday with the inlaws. They are amazing with her, and are generally lovely people, but it's still my inlaws so you know... I feel guilty when pip shouts in the night, and it's back to that infernal clicking and mouse noises from Christmas that the kid LOVES but that drive me mental. Even more so when I'm tired, which o always am when we spend time with them because it requires being away from home, so pip doesn't sleep properly.

Best bit of this morning was after we'd been out to dig the car from 2 foot of snow, boyfriend went for a nap, because it's exhausting only getting 7 hours sleep. Raaaah. Time to go home.

My mil clicks at the baby as well, it's really odd. Is it a regional thing do you think? My in laws are from Liverpool.

I can't stand anyone but me (other than other people with little babies) claiming to be tired. DH had the cheek to be tired after staying up really late to watch a film. FFS.

How is your boyfriend's mood Goats? Any better?

Oh no goats! I know how you feel and hope things get better once you're home!

stigz I hate hate hate the whole laundry thing I'm really trying to stay on top of it but it's never ending. It probably doesn't help that I have a bit of a thing about ironing. So many people say oh I hardly iron anything but I have to iron everything even pjs I know it's ridiculous but I cant help it!

My 16 month ols is being such hard work at the moment I actually feel like crying. He is just into everything I try to take him out of the house every morning but I've actually run out of indoor places to take him this week!

Pregnant - I stopped ironing the majority of stuff years ago. As long as you are diligent and fold/hang clothes as soon as the tumble dryer finishes they really do not need ironing. I get the iron out for about an hour every other week just to do DH shirts and random other things that don't tumble dry or crumple easily.

I know what you mean though. When my friend told me about not ironing, a tip she got from her Mum, I was horrified. It took some weaning off to realise that actually most clothes look exactly the same straight from tumble drier as they do ironed.

My only problem is wet washing backing up. Because I have to time the tumble drier so it finishes when I know I'll be able to empty and put washing away immediately - not easy timing with a baby in the house.

Sorry about your toddler being hard work. Is he safe enough just to be let lose in the back garden yet? Mine were out in the snow from 7am this morning although by the time they came back in two were crying due to snow down back

fate I know you're right I'm only making life hard for myself! I need to start weaning myself off maybe I could start with the pjs I know it ridiculous to iron them

Dds came home yesterday and were straight in the garden to build Olaf ds1 screaming at the patio doors to go out too so put his wellies, warm clothes, waterproof suit, hat,scarf and gloves on as we went out a tiny bit of snow fell on his glove. He had the biggest meltdown ever and refused to go out! Now he won't go near the snow, fabulous!! Makes the school run interesting

Ironing jarmers? Madness. Mind you my Mum (who is horrified by the fact that I rarely iron) irons her tablecloths and bed sheets too much time on her hands.

My school run was a nightmare interesting fun this morning too. Too chicken to go in the car, but rubbish pram in the snow. Damn hard work pushing pram through anything deeper than an inch. Plus had to stop three times to help push cars stuck or skidding in the snow.

I know. I'm not normal. My mum is the same so I blame her!!
I don't envy you pushing a pram in this I pushed my double buggy from the car to toddlers yesterday and I was sweating.
School is too far for me to walk so do it in the car saw two accidents yesterday. I have a 4x4 so I'm ok but lots of other mums at school struggling to get in.

I know ds's behaviour is totally normal and he's just being a toddler but bloody hell it's tough going at the moment. I don't mind admitting that Im Really looking forward to shipping them all out tomorrow night and having a night off. I plan to drink too much and dance on tables until the early hours

There are 14 months between my eldest two, I know the life of effectively having two babies in the house. It is really, really hard work.

I'd always planned to have two 'pairs' of children a year apart, separated by a more reasonable age gap. But the first to were so hard that I gave up on that plan very quickly.

Do I remember you saying you are not sure if you are 'done' (in terms of children) yet?

On the subject of many children, I've got an aunt who has not only an improbable number of her own children (I'm actually not sure how many) but also fosters babies, which is an incredible thing to do, I think. Just the thought of it makes me well up- sometimes they're days old when they come to her and her whole job is to love them, because that gives them a secure model of early attachment. Then she has to give them away, sometimes after months and months, and never see them again, often. I just can't imagine being prepared to do that again and again, but she does.

The baby had her bcg this morning and now she's snoozing next to me on the sofa. It's so exciting when she sleeps, she's been doing so little of it lately. A weird element of our lives at the moment us that I feel really capable and functional during the day, but as soon as it gets to about 8pm things start to fall apart. Last night I spent about an hour in floods of tears telling dp I couldn't cope, and now I feel okay again, but come the evening... It's like I'm a mogwai. bizarre.

Do you know fate I think you're right it's more the closeness in age I think I'm finding a bit tricky at the mo rather than the four children. I always knew that this first year would be tough having 3 at home with me but come September dd2 will go to school and ds1 will be at nursery 3 mornings a week so hopefully things won't be so full on! Wow some mornings I will only have one child!
I know in my heart of hearts I am done having children as I feel it wouldn't be fair to the others as I know when they all start school finding time to read with them all and so homework will be hard enough without throwing another one into the mix!
I think part of me will always think one more would have been nice but I know now I'm done.:)

The boys are now sleeping and I need to get off nm as I have a house viewing in the morning and my house looks like a crack den

Mn not nm!!

Tatty I'm the same about the evenings. I get to about 6/7 and then feel awful. It's dreading the nights I think, I get really panicky and tearful. Poor DH will just be trying to have a bit of an evening with me and I'm a wreck. I don't know that I can suggest anything but you're not alone.

How is she sleeping at night at the moment? A has done 4 pretty good nights in a row (8-7.30 with 3 or so quick wakings) but I'm so pessimistic I don't enjoy it I just wait in fear for the next shit patch.

Splendide - yep, Liverpool too!! Interesting. Boyfriend is better so far I think. All the better for talking about stuff I suppose. I'm keeping an eye on him though.

splendide she was sleeping quite well but at the moment she's asleep at 7.30, awake by 8, cluster feeds till about 11, then sleeps till 7.30 with a couple of wake ups, and naps erratically in the day. Not enough snoozes, baby! Plus I find the evenings utterly soul destroying and there's that feeling of just never having a break, ever. I'm hoping it's justa temporary thing, because she's discovering loads of new skills at the moment, and things will calm down again. What drives me completely nuts though is how easily she goes to sleep in the evening before she wakes up and decides she never needs to sleep again. It's like having something delicious dangled just out of reach. So enraging.

I think part of me will always think one more would have been nice but I know now I'm done.

I can really identify with that. I feel very definitely done. Lots of my friends either had their tubes tied or their DH had a vasectomy when they were 'done', but something so permanent is not something I could even consider. It's so final.

I know I will feel irrationally mournful when I reach the menopause, because it will be definite then. Even though I don't want any more children. I'm just odd like that.

Re Evenings

I don't know if anyone remembers me mentioning me dropping the 11pm feed a few weeks ago. Well after a couple of weeks I've now brought back the dreamfeed, either temporarily or permanently, we'll see.

I got to the point where dummy reinsertions from 4am were relentless. So bought back the dreamfeed and all is well again. Will try dropping it again at a later date.

I realise this isn't anywhere near as bad as many others with difficult night times, but I do have lots of empathy for you all. I know how horrible it is. Just take care of yourself in that day. Bring on the daytime naps for Mummy!

in other news, DH and I woke sleeping baby last night despite dreamfeed because we were being a bit, ahem, loud when getting jiggy next to her. But maybe that is far TMI for this thread

Sorry for multiple posts. Who was it that sometimes sits in the hall because baby is asleep in living room in carseat? DD is currently asleep in her carseat (just got back from baby massage), but she is in the hall and I am in the living room. That's the way to do it!

Lol fate! Me and dh considered it last but i told him id chop it off if he woke the baby so we didnt! Haha!

I wish paddy could have the bcg but we're not in a high risk area. Not that i want him to have unnecessary jabs but theres a lot of tb about these days

Lol Fate

Is that number 5 on the way then? ;)

Good grief I am tired today. We had 2 hourly bursts of sleep last night and rubbish napping today.

Bizarrely I dread weekends. I don't really get the extra help I need from DP and his DD comes to stay. She is lovely but tiring, and she gets a bit overexcited with the baby so he ends up kicking off. By the evening we have two tearful children and me and DP get a bit snappy with each other.

Goodness I hope it's not #5. Must sort out some proper contraception though .

Any of you used the coil? I am thinking about the marina coil.

We actually used withdrawal for ten years before we had him. Now I wouldn't - too risky! Not sure what I'll do, maybe a coil. Or a vasectomy for DH.