September 2014 Babies leave the newborn stage behind. Thread 2

[SeptemberBabies]

New thread because our initial thread is about to max out.

For babies born around September 2014 - or just before for early arrivals and just after for late arrivals.

also we have second lot of jabs next week which am dreading can anyone tell me their little one did badly with first lot but brilliantly with second lot?

How interesting with shouting instead of crying, ds started babbling louder (not really shouting, but talking in a loud and nagging way) instead of crying; but then that is a warning that I am unhappy, if ignored for long it will become crying and screaming ... I also prefer it to crying

Red I wish ds would settle that nicely for dh
Ds is also feeding a lot less and I feel he has lost weight when putting on his nappy, smaller tummy now ... I don't know if that's because he is sick or if the reflux became worse as he arches his back and gets frustrated and cries while feeding. We are off to doctor tomorrow because I feel his chest is rattling and coughs sound rough, but I am also going to talk about his feeding issue, reflux and weaning early. DS is 17.5 weeks but corrected 14 weeks and dh insists even if weaning early, we have to wait until his corrected age is 4 months not his actual age. I am not too sure, although after some research it makes sense to me to wait till 6 months under normal circumstances, in our case if food can replace medicine then i am up for it.

i know many feel dissapointed about having struggled with b/f. i just wanted to share about my friend who wanted to b/f her 1st baby but didn't manage it, so ff, but has managed to b/f her 2nd. she says b/f feels no different to ff in that she enjoyed both ways of feeding her babies just as much as each other and doesnt feel b/f makes any difference to bonding etc. she said she worried for a long time she had missed out on something with dc1, but is now reassured she didn't.

Nazly, let us know how it goes. I'm wondering what will be suggested if DS's weight doesn't pick up, and my suspicion will be the suggestion of early weaning. I've been hoping we can hold off too.

Sorry not read back

acorn when hes breathing can you see a tuck where his throat and chest meet?

Ds2 has had bronchiolitis 3x. Fucking horrible. hope hes better soon.
In a tub of hot water put some baby albosoil In itand stick it near heater.
also peel garlic, thread it in some thread and put it close to him. I think its something like 6garlic cloves. It works to help stop the cough due tk the smell I think.

Ds has been a paim thr arse.
Hes just jad his first lot of imms as didnt get letter through for them

started weaning too as he wouldnt settle with just bottle so prior to imms he was a njce content baby.

oh good lord. b woke up at 5.30 and after eating lay in crib grunting and chatting for an hour so got up and he will not sleep so is a right grump. we are about to go out in the pram to enforce zzzzzzzzzzz time. ...

After 2 weeks of my 11 week old sleeping through 11-7, she woke at 4am this morning and was upset until we got up. My boobs have stopped making milk in the night because I've not needed any night feeds, so it's put all my normal feeds out today. No idea how it's going to pan out, but may have a 'no milk left' crying session from her later

I think DD is poorly, snuffly nose. Other DC have all had bad coughs so might be that. Did have lots planned for the day today but DD and myself are having a duvet day in bed since she is poorly.

Red - Rather than weaning onto solids early, might you consider formula top ups on top of your expressed milk? It's a personal thing but I think rushing weaning onto solids is unhealthy (I'm a big believer in baby led weaning onto proper food).

There's no need to rush. If you are worried about baby dropping centiles, you can increase his calories with milk rather than food before he's ready.

Beccus I bf three of my children and ff one (DC3) and agree that it doesn't adversely affect bonding with your baby and such. Indeed the better sleep and no growth spurt issues makes parenting much easier when formula feeding so that happier mum = happier baby = better bonding experience.

FATE, how can I get DS to eat formula if he won't eat breast milk? I was under the impression that breast milk was better than formula and to use it over and above formula for that reason.

OIC, sorry Red. I thought you meant it was a supply issue. Didn't realise it was a feeding issue.

DD will only take a bottle when she is not very hungry or asleep so I can't offer much suggestion there.

My supply has dipped which is a stress (Dropped 250ml a day for the last couple of days, but seem to be having a better day today after drinking more water, expressing more regularly, fenugreek, hand expressing for a couple of days).

But the real issue is he just won't eat any more!! The HV advised me to offer more food which really isn't great advice if he doesn't actually eat it.

So I'm worried about what they will say if his weigh doesn't pick up.

Good to hear your supply is back up, you really are a poster girl for exclusive expressed feeding!

I assume you've tried some form of dream feeding in the late evening? DD only takes her 11pm bottle of expressed milk because I wake her from a deep slumber and shove the teat in her mouth as soon as she has opened one eye. It must be a reflex sucking because she'll have quite a bit whilst seemingly asleep.

As it happens this is what I am doing all day today. DD is poorly (and so am I) so as a means to keep her sleeping and not distressed, I am expressing and then giving her a feed from a bottle every 2 hours today. By feeding very frequently she isn't getting hungry and so is napping well. I time her expressed bottles for when she is asleep so that she takes them with no fuss and goes back to sleep - less effort for her from a bottle than the breast.

She's having about 80-100 ml every 2 hours today. Because I bf I have no idea if this is a lot or not enough. She's stayed very calm, so I assume it will be OK for the day. Back to normal feeding tomorrow.

Yeah he has a feed when we go to bed.

This calculator seems to be coming up with figures bang on what he has, so it looks like he's there or there abouts and has been for a few weeks.

So I'm at a bit of a loss really. I'm just so worried about his weight going down again as there doesn't seem to be much I can do, or much I'm doing wrong anyway.

What are the genetics like in your family? Do you have family members who are small/petite?

DD Is huge for her age (between 91-98 percentile) but no one else in the entire extended family are big, my other children aren't. So at some point DD will drop from the high percentile she is now to something more normal. I wouldn't see anything wrong in this, just finding her natural weight.

So is it possible that your son's natural weight will be on the 9th percentile or lower?

Just an idea

Thanks for the link. I don't know DDs current weight so I can't use it. I've not had her weighed since she was 6 weeks, must try and remember to go next week.

Red I talked to the dr this morning and he disagreed with weaning early (instead of medicine) idea. He said he understands my point but that their little bodies is not quite ready for solids yet at this age and He said he would wait until 6m;

I said I thought giving food maybe more natural and better than medicine to thicken the milk but in his opinion breast milk is the most natural thing until he is older.

He also said you are the mum, you could if you wanted to, now he is 4 months but if you ask for my advice I'd say wait.

He is a GP, but his main area of interest is babies and he is really good and knowledgable in this area, so I am not going to wean just yet at least until ds shows all the signs that he is ready.

I just used that calculator Red & I can not believe the results, it says as average ds should be having 40 oz per day?! well I would be very surprised if he has that much and here is my reason:
He normally feeds only a few minutes unless he wants to sleep or nap , then he would stay on breast for twenty minutes or half an hour, but does not drink properly during this time, goes in and out of sleep

I do express every night for Gaviscon and sometimes I freeze for when I am back to work but the other night I timed it and I only got 3oz (around 100ml) in half an hour!!!! Now admittedly I always express in the evening when milk supply is not great and a couple of hours after his last feed, but still that is quite little...
If the calculator is right perhaps my supply is down now he is sick and doesn't feed properly!!

I am small/petite. I was 19 Bmi and had been forever but deliberately gained weight before trying to get pregnant (My prospects of getting anywhere close to this again, look somewhat dim though!). DH is 6'3". He's pretty average in weight now, but when I first met him he was very slim indeed from all the sport he did (around 19Bmi too I think).

So the genetics are very possible. Its just the way its been stressed as being such an issue by the HVs. I really don't want any more intrusion as they have had me on extra observation from the word go as it is.

Naz - you can't judge realistically how much milk baby has on the breast by timing or expressing.

As a comparison to your 3oz in half an hour (both boobs? One boob?) I can on occasion get 6oz from one boob (the favoured one) in a matter of minutes - maybe 5 minutes if that. If I miss a feed it literally gushes out. Both boobs probably 9oz from one missed feed.

But at other times, like today when I'm poorly and feeding often, maybe 60ml (less than 2oz) in 30 minutes doing both boobs.

So I can get anywhere between 2oz and 9oz in one session of expressing, sometimes taking 30 minutes sometimes taking 5 minutes. It's impossible to tell how much DD is getting in any one feed.

red, my dd1 was born on 50th centile and dropped to 9th. hv worried and wanted me to top up, which I didnt want to do. she was sleeping through from an early age as well. b/f advisor supported me not wanting to top up and spoke to hv about this, but thought 3 months was v young for a baby to be sleeping through and was going too long without a feed, so wanted me to dream feed. 4 month sleep regression hit around this time and she woke up once a night for a few months and went back to 25th centile. then I weaned her at 6 months and eventually decided hv appointments were a waste of time. am going to book her in for a 2yr check tho, just out of curiosity to see what her weight is like now. she is tall and slimish now. r u worried about him, or do u think hv are looking at their charts and not the baby?

Beccus, that's really helpful. Thank you.

DS has generally been sleeping through 11 - 7 from 8 or 9 weeks bar about 4 nights. I've usually had a fair idea if he's likely to wake from the amount he's eaten through the day though and its always been on days when he's been down a bit on what I expect. If he has a night feed he tends to have smaller feeds during the following day. So I've been under the general impression he's getting enough. (Again backed up by the fact I can actually measure how much he has been having and its within the upper and lower limits of that calculator).

My problem is this continued pressure that I'm doing it wrong or not feeding him enough, because I'm expressing. The impression I get is its really frowned on, and they don't know what to advise. Its just easy to say "give him more" and to assume I can't possibly be expressing enough and you can't do it exclusively long term.

I wish I could skip the HV, but its not an option for me unfortunately, as they decided we were at risk because of my anxiety. The irony is, its only seeming to fuel it and be what I'm worried about rather than him. I've been told to weigh in at least once a month, as a minimum and I'm worrying about not doing it, especially since this is now the second time they've raised a bit of a concern about his weight.

DS is a happy little chappy who smiles at everyone, is growing (he's very long), has a ridiculously strong grip (and massssiiiiiivvveeee hands) and otherwise seems to be hitting developmental milestones. It just seems to be a battle with the HVs and their charts.

Thinking about it DH said last night he isn't working a week on Tuesday, so it'd probably be a good idea for me to drag him along to the clinic if its still running before the Christmas break. If only for moral support and the potential backup. It'll either be reassuring or he can fight my cause. DS has his vaccinations about 45mins after anyway which is just round the corner.

Nazly, that info from the GP is also useful to know too. I don't want to be in a position where I feel 'forced' into something I'm not comfortable with here.

Hello all :)

holls for Elijah's first lot of jabs he was really unsettled for almost a week for his 2nd lot he was unsettled for a day. He has his next lot on Monday fx he will omly unsettled for a few hours :)

Eli is so close to sleeping through he manages it about twice a week. But he still not settling till 10ish

Red I don't understand why they would raise any concern with your method of feeding; surely according to everybody it is better or healthier than formula and you have enough supply too; so if ( a big if) there is any issue here it is not your method of feeding!?

It feels absurd that they seem to cause your anxiety with their charts and then monitor you for being anxious. At the end of the day these charts are only based on statistics and it should not surprise them that some babies may not fit the charts ... My understanding from these charts was always that they are a quick short cut for hvs to learn if a baby is developing well but it is not a comprehensive or exclusive tool; i.e. If a baby is developing well and is healthy then they should not be concerned about the charts?

Can I admit something girls; I have been to health clinics probably more than all of you because of ds reflux, and at some point I came to a firm conclusion that I can not rely on them to have a correct robust or scientific opinion about my concerns - so While I understand how good it is to have them as support in society, I can't trust them with any serious issues and I have plenty of examples why not...

Hello cookie x

lost he does have the bit sinking at the base of his neck and below his ribs which worries me. He had that when he was seen at a&e, but they weren't concerned as not too bad. He's still the same as he was 2 days ago tho has been feeding like crazy all day. ive tried to keep him sleeping most of the day as breathing and wheezing much calmer when he's asleep

cookie oh fingers crossed that's the same for us. I am dreading them already

b has been such a grouch all day. sure it is cos he was tired as was all smiles after sleeps.....!!! managed to make him throw up cos had big feed then took him out in pram jostling over cobbles, got home and unsurprisingly he brought up mainly spit and and a bit of milk. shit mum. he was awake from 5.15 until 11.15 when I took him out in pram. slept then till 12.45 then 2-2.45 and 4-4.45 so not a huge amount. I wonder if I should start putting him in his crib to sleep during the day?

Acorn - DD has been just the same. I feel like she's broken me today, been such hard work. Her nose is so blocked that she can neither breastfeed nor suck on her dummy - the two ways to get her to sleep.

Been giving expressed milk by bottle today, but she's had 10oz more than I've produced, which worries me a lot :(

Red - HV really are not compulsory, at all. My best friend has anxiety related mental health issues that had to be monitored closely when she had her two DC. But she did not get along with the HV for exactly the same reason you mention - they made her more anxious with their "advise".

Instead she had weekly GP appointments to discuss her mental health and the doctor 'weaned' her off getting baby weighed so that she didn't worry. She just discussed any concerns with doc during weekly appointments. Could you speak to your GP about a similar arrangement?

I don't mean to pry and feel free to completely ignore this question - but have your spoken to your GP about your post-natal anxieties and got some medication? Anti-anxiety and anti-depressant drugs are the making of my friend.