December 2013 - sleepless nights & lots of cooing

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Our very first Thread :)

Oops lisba not lisab! Sorry

Mirrors also a big hit here, and anything with contrasting stripes.
Well, all that awake time earlier has caught up with her, she's been grizzly and miserable since DH got home, managed to get herself off to sleep about 20 mins before she wakes up because she's hungry. Poor sausage, hopefully tomorrow will be a bit easier as we will be getting out for some fresh air and that seems to be a sure fire way of getting her to have a good kip.
Those of you bottle feeding how much are you offering and how many times a day does your baby want to eat? Genevieve is 6 weeks 3 days, about 10lbs and is eating between 100-120ml about 7 or 8 times a day, half ebm and half formula.

Mogz - I'm very similar to you, 6 weeks and half ebm half formula. Ds has 150ml ish 7 times a day, occasionally 6. I just increased it as was having to top up sometimes when he wouldn't settle and was happening more often.

So.. I'm getting a bit down about night times, am I expecting too much? Ds easily goes 4 hours, sometimes more, but it takes sooo long to settle him after. Last night he fed at 11 and I didn't get him asleep until 2.30! He then slept to 4.30 but it would be so much better if he went to sleep quicker. He was crying and kicking when I tried to sit down with him, and all this was just to get him to sleep in with me, not even in crib as dh was away.

It's getting me down that we have no bedtime yet and no pattern at all but he is still small, maybe I'm impatient.

Like lisba I feel bad but haven't offered Joshua many toys to look at- I'm dashing around looking after the other two kids so when I put J down there's not much time to play with him (poor 3rd child!) which reminds me alyssa how are to coping with 3?? I had a wobble today- finding it so hard- ESP trying to bf as the other 2 seem to act up when I'm doing it as if they know I can't move or do anything. Ds2 has started wetting himself (after being dry for 4 months) and keeps doing it whilst I'm feeding, and wanting help to go to the loo despite being capable of doing it himself- attention seeking I think. And ds1 is still lashing out sometimes in anger. Argh!

hot we have no bedtime routine yet but thinking of starting one. My worry is how do we for baby's bath time in with the other 2 getting to bed?! Also josh is unsettled from around 6-9 or 10 so we haven't tried putting him down upstairs but tonight we did turn out the lights in the lounge and he fell Asleep so maybe he's too stimulated downstairs with tv, lights etc. Anyone else doing proper bedtime routine and finding it works?

Ooh, Lamaze firefly, thanks for the tip. I think I'll pop into mothercare tomorrow and dangle it over him and see if we get a response!

Mum, I struggle a bit with routine. With the bf he's often unpredictable with his feeds, which means bath/bottle or feed/bed doesn't really work. Plus I would try putting him in his sleeping bag in his crib, but that goes against SIDS advice,. We have him downstairs with us but sometimes he sleeps and sometimes he doesn't.

hot bedtime is my fear! I can not wait for the first time she sleeps through! Lilah is the same at night she takes forever to settle and i get so emotional i feel useless!

mum I find putting him to bed upstairs with the lights out he sleeps better than downstairs with tv etc.
I'm coping ok with 3 we have our own routine now lol but my 2 act up when I'm feeding too, it's like you said....they know they can get away with it cos youre stuck feeding.
I try to ignore and they stop as they're not getting the attention for doing it but if I shout they get worse. Xx

alyssa yeah I know they're just competing for my attention- I guess it'll pass- eventually! Do you bath your LO every night? I haven't mastered bathing (well we shower them-it's quicker/easier) the older ones and bathing baby but I need to get a routine sorted ASAP!! It's just so hard if DH isn't home to help

pistachio we have a few Lamaze toys - I think

Bloody phone- hit send too soon

I think the one I'm using ATM is a butterfly and it has colours on one side, black and white on the other- josh seems to like it- he's fascinated with the b&w which seems to be preference for young babies

Actually just had a closer look- it's a peacock not a butterfly!! Very cute and colourful tho!

Were struggling with sleep too. He'll sleep through anything during the day if I hold him or he's in the sling, but if I put him down, he's awake within five mins. Is that normal? Feeding is another issue. Is ther a breast feeding board on here? I can't find one. The problem is I feed, after five mins he falls asleep. I try to keep him awake but can't, he does sleep very heavily. I put him down, he then wakes up after five mins showing feeding cues. Last night in desperation I bottle fed him ebm just to get him to sleep. He only does this at night, daytime is fine, 20-30 mins a feed. GAH!!

sangelina that can be normal for young babies- and frustrating! There is a feeding board- go to 'feed the world' then breast and bottle feeding. I'm often in there either asking for help or reading other posts!

Things I do if LO is particularly sleepy- change their nappy first, take their clothes off so they're not too hot. Mine gets sleepy if he's too snuggly and warm and although it seems cruel, you want them to have a good feed so getting them cooler is beneficial to both of you! Also half way through the feed I either change nappy if he needs it or put them down I a cool mat (I put him in his raised playpen) so they're not so hot next to you, to wake up a bit before feeding the other side.

I also tickle his ears, face, feet whilst feeding if he starts falling asleep. It is really hard to keep them awake so I sympathise but hopefully some of these ideas may help. I think they'll get better as they get older. Mines causally worse this morning. He woke @ 7 for a feed but is so sleepy now I'm struggling to finish it!

Actually not casually

It is so nice to have a place to come and post/read and just go "Is this normal" and to find most of the time the answer is yes! What did mums do before mumsnet??

Nighttime isn't great for us either so I think it is normal. I know a lot of people say 6 weeks and they start sleeping through but I call bollocks. the HV told me not to let him go more than 4 hours in the day inbetween feeds so surely that would mean no more than 4 hours at night time either. I mean, if Thomas was happily sleeping - I'm definitely not going to go "HEY, it has been 4 hours - wake up!" I am currently only BFing and the thought of a nighttime routine seems miles away. I'm on the same page as pistachio that DS's feeds aren't very routined and so I don't know if he is going to go 30 minutes or 3 hours in between. Thomas also will be completely asleep in my arms - put him in his moses basket & I think I've nailed it - he's still asleep. Well sure enough only 5 or so minutes later he is awake! Really not sure why as if I put him down in the bed next to me he'll stay asleep for ages. Babies, eh?!?

Do any of your LOs self sooth? Last night I put Thomas in his moses basket & he did wake up but was very happy to just lay there for about 10 minutes. Then he started getting a little fussy & I tried to sooth him in the basket - he refuses to suck on a dummy so I helped him get his fist into his mouth but it just doesn't work - after a few minutes he starts the screaming and I have to get him out to sooth him. But even then the only way I can sooth him is to put him on the boob!

mum I have a baby bath downstairs and let the other 2 help me and then I swaddle him up and feed him, works a treat. Get some johnsons bath the purple one and it knocks him out.
I bath him most nights but when dp is at work, involving the other 2 has been a life saver lol. Xx

Crispy my hv said most babies can't self sooth before about 8 weeks, but it's probably good practice to let them have a moment to themself if they do wake up and seem quite happy.
Totally with you all who have sleepy feeding babies, I had to put a cold flannel on Genevieve last night to wake her up to finish as a nappy change, clothes off and tickling failed to work.

Thanks so much ladies; I'll try some of those tonight. It's like looking after a little alien, isn't it? You just don't speak the same language. I left him on the bed awake just now so I could go to the loo and he screamed for 20 mins. He's just tired (he'd just fed, winded and been changed)

Go. The. Fuck. To. Sleep. He's in the sling now, snoring.

Incidentally, a freind gave me a book with that title, it's a lovely adult story. There's a youtube video of Samuel L. Jackson reading it. Comedy gold. Search for 'go the fuck to sleep'. You won't regret it.

Well dp on his 4 days off and what did he do after his turn to feed last night? Put Lleyton in our friggin bed and he kicked off all night wanting to be back in.
2 nights of routine work out to fucking waste
Got to my turn, so I changed his nappy, swaddled him, fed him his bottle and guess what?? Slept in his bed when I put him down.

Arghhhhh dp I could kill you lol
I'm sure Lleyton picks up on the stress as I keep myself all calm and dp let's it get to him.

Ds2 was ill last night and vomited all over his carpet, then the bathroom, then downstairs. Then Lleyton decided to kick off and ds2 wouldn't let me put him down, so I've got him in one arm and pushing Lleytons pushchair with the other while ds1 is running to the fridge getting jelly babies out and this was the night dp decided to go to the gym and then swimming
So I've come to the conclusion if I can handle that, I can handle anything

Finally got to get some me time and ended up watching geordie shore mortal marathon
Ahhh the old days lmao

Good to know I'm not the only one! I'm craving a routine but it's just too early I think. I have noticed that ds has started napping soundly from 5-7ish which isn't ideal as he should probably be awake then so tired for bed. Not sure how to avoid it as he gets v tired at that time and over tired is worse than sleeping. Thinking about it, he often wakes at 5.30-6 so maybe his 12 hour night is off... Hmm, so how do I fix that?

And Alyssa, how annoying, I agree sometimes it's just easier to do it yourself as then you can do it your way. My dh often falls asleep with ds when settling him and so he never makes it to bassinet, annoying when I'm trying to get him used to it..

I keep telling myself that when my mom goes tomorrow & DH is back at work and it's just me & DS we'll get a routine. Wishful thinking. But I am craving a routine & hoping we fall naturally into one soon.

alyssa well he lasted 10 minutes upstairs tonight before he kicked off so had to bring him downstairs. He's so fractious in the evenings- fusses, cries and just isn't happy- docs label it as colic but I don't know if ds hunger, tiredness, both or something else. Beginning to wonder if my milk is low this time as it doesn't settle him and he looks for more- DH giving him a bottle of expressed milk now, then he'll have to have formula later as I haven't got any more expressed.
Whoever mentioned self soothing- yeah they can't do it yet- remember my ds2 finding his fingers at 10 weeks and it was great - he slept brilliantly from then on and has done ever since.

We've started doing a loose gf routine and it's working well so far (apart from the colicky few hours in the eve) he seems to be sleeping and eating roughly the right times and only waking once in the night to feed (after the 10.30 feed) so I'm happy with that

I'm another one with a fussy baby but weirdly she settles OK at night, she's just quite miserable during her "awake time" in the day unless she's feeding, or over my shoulder, or weirdly, when lying face down over my knees, or on her changing mat. She sleeps ok in her carseat or her sling in the day, less so in her carrycot or Moses basket, but is fine in the Moses basket at night. Weird.

She's still suffering with constipation and wind - visibly uncomfortable until either a trump or a poo emerges. She's only pooing every 2-3 days though, so no idea how to help. We have her 6wk check on Tuesday and a HV visit on Monday so I am going to see what they have to say...

Alyssa I feel your pain with your dh messing stuff up - I blame my dh for our nightimes, which had been getting really good, for turning really bad after he cocked things up on Thursday! It's hard biting my tongue but I'm trying!
Is 6wk a common time for odd behaviour or is it just a fact of baby loopiness?!

Aw dp stressed to hell tonight.
Had a baby who wouldn't settle and a screaming ds2 when he went to bed and a ds1 running riot screaming.
I said now you see what I deal with when you're at work and I do it alone
So I soothed Lleyton and stopped ds2 crying and got him to sleep and enlisted ds1 to help me make a slimming world pasta bake which I then served for tea with salad while putting ds1 to bed, doing all the dishes and made the night bottles and cleaned the kitchen and cooker.....dp looks amazed lmao

Want to echo Crispy's sentiment, it is so great to have you all here to talk to. Feel sometimes like I'm going a bit mad and don't know if I'm doing the right kind of stuff but to see that what I'm going through is really normal and having everyone reassuring each other is bloody brilliant.
Having a good evening, DH telling the baby stories and playing with a light up seahorse thingy whilst she babbles away and flings her arms about. It's amazing to think in such a short amount of time just how much she has changed and developed. I am more tired and frazzled than I've ever been but if I step back and take a breath I realise I'm also really happy with our little family and that all the trouble leading up to now has been worth it.