October 2013 Bus Graduates: the one where we're not pregnant anymore

[MrsHoratioNelson]

Check in here. Do we still need the stats?

Thanks all! DH didn't apologise last night so still in a sulk with him, let's hope he apologises this morning or it's going to be a long day

ruby - 5ml is a teaspoon if you need something to measure it out with.

Oh and a tip for everyone. Put the lid back on gripe water to avoid a lovely aniseed scented carpet like the one I now have.

Oh and a measuring spoon teaspoon is 5ml.

I've hit a personal best 1hr30 mins sleep all night!

soupqueen - I'm jumping way ahead during my catch-up-again session,but i just wanted to say that if you are using daktarin cream (or even the oral gel) on your nipples then i was told i didn't need to wash it off before feeding. With my first i was told to wash it off & i just had to stop using it in the end because the pain caused by washing it off cracked & bleeding nipples was even worse than the pain caused by not using it. I just thought I'd say that so that it might help ease your discomfort.

Also,orange,i am concerned about your nipples (sorry! Not something i thought I'd be typing this morning). I had blisters,cracks & bleeding with DS,it hurt like hell & i can still remember the agony & still see where a couple of the cracks were,almost three years on. Nobody could ever see what was wrong with our latch (trust me,i had dozens of people up close & personal with us),but there must have been something not quite right. I know you're intending to go & get checked out anyway,but please do - blisters,pinching,cracking,deep purple colouration are all indicators of trauma & shouldn't be happening. If you can get it sorted now it will stop it getting worse.xx

Oh flyer that's shit. I'm sorry. I haven't had a great night tonight either with mammoth feedings & poosplosions (her,not me). DS is not well again either & there just seems to be no chance for a nap to help during the day.

has A been a happy awake or spent the night screaming at you? Did you think more about a night nanny? Guess it depends how much use your dp is to you. Mine has been sleeping in the spare room since the second night L & i got home from hospital because i absolutely refuse to have him laying next to me snoring his fucking head off while i do nappies & feeds alone,to then be told in the morning how exhausted he is. Bullshit. So this way he doesn't get to do competitive tiredness & is being a lot more help in terms of the odd bit of housework (i am still struggling in terms of pgp) & making dinner. And we are doing a lot better as a couple this time. I am not plotting to murder & chop him up this time. Blah blah,sleep deprivation & random ramblings...

Ana I was told yesterday to try putting breast milk on nappy rash (indeed to put it on any ailment lol!) apparently you need to let it air dry but it works wonders! Haven't tried it yet but worth a go x

Tucking she has just been awake and uncomfy I think wind and doesn't know what to do with herself.

Dp is snoring next to me hence why I've had no zzz as well. He is usually in the spare room but my mum is stating over. I seriously considered sleeping on the nursery floor at 5am or the 4th bedroom dp uses as his office also considered there. Can't be doing with the competitive tiredness either

Flyer you win! I had 1hr 40 mins of sleep. No idea what baby's problem was. He's perfectly happy this morn. I am not. First night alone as R in London at conference. Miserable. Feel like a failure which I know is silly but can't help it. Hugs to all who had a shit night, xxx

Mnippy I spoke to a HV and she said there is no reason why I can't use infacol and gripe water at the same time.

Hugs and coffee for ready, tucking and flyer hope your all able to nap today x

flyer thankyou for yesterday am glad A has stopped being so sick and that you are feeling calmer/more confident about her weight.

soup im sorry to hear scan didnt get well but im glad that o something is wrong it was caught so early on. hope your ok today x

shooting glad baby B is keeping some milk down today. poor thing is horriblw when theyre ill ever bt especially when theyre so little still.

untitled sorry to hear DH is being a bit crap and still not apologised. mine used to do things like that with DS but looking back I think it was because he just wasnt confident because hes much better this time. hope he apologises soon x

Poorly mummy toddler and baby here, all very snotty and if either of them have the same headache I do its not a surprise they're both miserable :( that alongside vomit id like ro just stay in bed today since my pyjamas and bed are already covered in sick and snot am minimising he mess... eugh.
Hope everyone else is having a good day. Thank goodness its Friday!

Thanks tucking. I think it was just from a night like flyer and readys the night before last when I only slept 1h20m and fed the rest of the time but definitely getting checked out again anyway.

DH is off work today so did all but one of the feeds last night and took Thomas downstairs this morning for a few hours so I could rest a bit, just had to express in the night. Still tired but good to catch my breath a bit. I also started to miss my baby which is probably a good sign. Hope those who had bad nights can nap a bit today. I am rubbish at daytime naps.

Tucking are you planning to go back to physio about pgp?

Hi orange,yes i am waiting for an appt to come thru for physio as i have a hand span diastasis thing (you can fit a hand between my abdominal muscles,great) i actually have to phone today to chase up where my appointment is. The pgp is immensely better than it was but still flares up if i do too much of anything. Walking too far,carrying a basket of washing,can't lift my toddler,hoovering etc etc. All real life things that i really need to be able to do.

How about you? You suffered quite badly too i think? Also,was it you who had a 3rd degree tear? I was told (by letter after 4 weeks) that until my baby is 6 weeks old i can be seen by an obstetric physio for any bowel or bladder issues caused by my 3rd deg tear (which happened even though i did perineal massage & in spite of an episiotomy (which hurt more in all ways - being done,being stitched,healing etc).

Yes still twinges of pgp, laying on my side in bed, walking too quickly, lifting Thomas while standing up from a chair etc. going to mention at 6 week check (I have a growing list!) and really should start doing exercises for it again when I have time ha ha ha.
no third degree tear but an episiotomy and he was still stuck so they made it deeper.

He apologised! Yay!

We also had a chat about how I was feeling and he said he'll be better.

This morning he's taken LO out and has given me an hour to catch up on masterchef so feeling good today.

Re. breastmilk treatments - I've been putting it in LO's eye as was swollen and pink and it's done the trick so I'd recommend using it to treat any issues although weirdly enough, the website I was looking at also suggested using it as a sexual lubricant

tucking I had a third degree tear too! I was seen by the consultant at the hospital 6 weeks after the birth, but seeing as I'm having no problems I didn't need to be seen by anyone else. how are you healing up? its 7 weeks here and I've still not braved dtd!!! poor dp!

Baby Ready not ready! Finally in a deep sleep and we need to wake up, feed and get daddy from train! Why baby why? On the plus side he does look completely gorgeous when he's so peaceful and asleep.

Ahh roof it was you i was thinking of with the tear. I think i have got off very lightly,it appears to have healed beautifully & was much less painful than the episiotomy. I'm glad to hear you haven't had problems either because when i read my notes & discovered i had this 3rd deg tear,i did some internet research & was horrified. We both seem to have been extremely lucky :).

i haven't really thought too much about dtd yet. DD is 5wks today,it has crossed my mind fleetingly a couple of times lately but with her & toddler DS i don't know where to summon the energy from. If MoN is reading this she would be horrified at my lack of effort! ;)

i do now have vaginal thrush to add to DD's oral thrush & me having it on my nipples too,so all these things are putting me off further...

is anyone else contemplating having another baby? I mean,I'm not into the idea of being pregnant again already (or soon) but i don't feel my baby making days are over yet. We always said we wanted three,but i fear i am going to have my work cut out persuading DP that we should do it again. Which sucks. But hopefully if i leave it a while,i can start from zero & make it seem like it's his idea... The thought of being pregnant again is pretty awful after this pregnancy that was just crap with sickness,illness,pgp,crutches etc etc. But the thought of not being pregnant again is also pretty abhorrent. As painful as labour was i feel so empowered by the fact that i coped on g&a & hypnobirthing (kinda went out the window with all the extremely loud swearing i was doing due to the speed of progress) & that i spent most of the labour in the pool & still managed to get her out by myself even after being whisked to the medical side & threatened with ventouse (episiotomy was done in preparation for this) but still managed to get her out myself. Basically it was such a positive experience that i cant bear to think that i won't do it again.

Hmmm..... Tried the gripe water ...... Now Alice and I are covered in vomit..... She did do some farts too. Anyone else had this? Is it worth persevering with it?

Tucking I don't want anymore I'm done with the one baby. That however does make me a little sad that I will never be pregnant again or experience it again but I don't feel I could cope with another round of sleep deprivation and stress I've had recently.

Ruby we tried it with A and had a lovely projectile vomit incident. I don't think I will use it again

ruby have discovered the C does not like the gripe water - and how the bloody hell are you supposed to juggle the bottle, the spoon and the baby on your own? Between the juggling and C's obvious distaste, he now smells faintly of McDonalds hamburgers

Baby awake and feeding begrudgingly!
Tucking, I always thought I'd have 2 or 3. But this is no 1 and I'm genuinely unsure if I could ever do it again. I was lucky with a v speedy
Labour and delivery, very speedy physical recovery....stitches fine in a couple of days, back in skinny jeans day 3 etc and bf established reasonably speedily and no pain. And best of all a perfect baby bot. BUT I was not prepared for the massive emotional impact. To be honest I'm up and down like a yo yo, any crying that I can't understand makes me so upset and edgy. I cry numerous times every day. Feel generally like a failure and a crap mother. I'm not sure i can put myself and my amazing partner through this again. I also felt pretty traumatised by labour and the thought of it again and the total lack of control that it and the baby brings is unbelievably difficult for me to cope with. I know I sound like a wuss but it has truly taken me by surprise how hard I have found the whole thing. I do a demanding professional job and I think I'm so used to being in control and on top that its totally thrown me. Sorry for endless waffle. Better get our asses to the train station!!

flyer i don't mean to dismiss your feelings,i just want to let you know that i had a shite time after DS was born & i could not believe anyone would do it more than once. You might be right & you might stick with your decision not to do it again,but never say never... Hugs to you because you really have put up with an inordinate amount of total crap.xx

Can totally relate to the loss of control of all aspects of life too. Emotions being all over the shop (I've been much more myself this time,but cried every day for months first time around). I used to lament the fact that no-one tells you about the total "devastation" wrecked on your life. But then i know a few of us on the thread who had done it before made gentle attempts to share some of our experiences & until you have actually experienced it for yourself,you can have no idea whatsoever/desire to hear or believe what people are attempting to tell you. The shock of first time motherhood is enormous.

i recommend a book called "what mothers do". It is amazing for helping you to see that what you spend your day doing now is vitally important.