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Original poster

November 2012 - Teeth? Don't talk to us about teeth.

999 replies

StuntNun · 23/08/2013 09:11

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1826507-November-2012-To-sterilise-or-not-to-sterilise-bottles-that-is

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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ValiumQueen · 30/08/2013 23:44

I desperately need sleep MM, so hopefully others will be along soon to hold your hand x

fruitpastilles · 30/08/2013 23:46

mm him pushing you into a wall is not and will never have been brought on by yourself. Do as vq says and lock the door. Hope you are ok xx

MissMummy1 · 30/08/2013 23:49

Please sleep VQ.

He has taken some of the keys so I can't lock all of the doors. Tilly woke up when I screamed. I feel sick and I have nowhere else to go Sad

fruitpastilles · 30/08/2013 23:50

Can you go to your mums?

GTbaby · 30/08/2013 23:52

Mm it's not your fault. Pls don't blame yourself. ((Hugs))

MissMummy1 · 30/08/2013 23:56

My mum has got more than enough on her plate with her health at the moment so it isn't really an option Sad

I am not leaving but after this I want him out, for real this time. A v quick calculation on entitled to and i can just about afford to live assuming I get no more work. I cannot afford a deposit to move anywhere else. How the fuck did my life become such a fucking mess?! And why do I never fucking learn? Sad Sad Sad

Sorry I hate myself for moaning

fruitpastilles · 31/08/2013 00:03

Moan away, that's what we are here for. Whatever happens and whatever you decide to do we will all be here holding your hand. I do think he has had enough chances now though and you have put up with enough. I hope you have the strength to do what's right for you and M xx

applepieinthesky · 31/08/2013 00:14

Oh mm Sad Nothing you say or do would ever justify him pushing you into a wall my lovely. I wanted to say something earlier when you said there have been rows recently. If he was really sorry he would be on his best behaviour, it's still so soon after the last time.

applepieinthesky · 31/08/2013 00:22

There is nothing wrong in believing in someone and giving them a second chance. He has fucked up, not you. It's no reflection on you at all. But it would be best to draw a line now and end it for Tilly's sake.

Is he still not home? Are you scared of what might happen when he comes back? (((Hugs)))

MissMummy1 · 31/08/2013 00:29

I just hate him so much for ruining everything. And myself for believing he would change. I have no idea where he is and his phone is off. I am exhausted but feel too sick to sleep.

izzybizzybuzzybees · 31/08/2013 00:42

mm none of this is your fault. Not one iota of it. He has done this. Nothing you can say or do will change that. Is there anyone you can call at all? Someone would come over I'm sure? I'm here, will be most of the night I'd think. I will pm you on Fb. I'm so sad to see this Sad

MissMummy1 · 31/08/2013 00:42

Tilly and me are going to my grans for the night. She is in the village and he phoned her. Bastard.

Bryzoan · 31/08/2013 02:10

So sorry to hear that mm. Not your fault at all. I feel really sad for you. I hope you and t are now settling at your grans and are able to sleep tonight. Why did he call her though - did he tell her what he did? Big big hugs.

Bryzoan · 31/08/2013 02:14

In other news - I sold my bednest today - so can empathise with how you feel about your jumparoo vq. I also sold my Kari-me. I loved my sling and my bednest :-( The sane part of me knows we are finished with babies - but I can't quite get my head around it. Time to stop ebaying?

PurplePidjin · 31/08/2013 02:14

i hope you're safe now Thanks

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT

YellowWellies · 31/08/2013 02:45

Yawn (attempts cool 'did you miss us whilst on our hols' swagger) yo dudes!!!

So still regressing in his own bed but less bad than on hols as at least I can't see him waving at me in the middle of the night now we're in separate rooms. Envy Envy

Got lots to catch up on as the WiFi in our holiday cottage didn't reach our bedroom through the thick walls so despite many night wakings I was forced to read books not MN - oh the humanity. Holiday was good, seeing the bear with his cousins and assorted family dogs (chihuahua, Yorkshire terrier, labradoodle, lab) persuaded us to take the plunge and get a pup. Wink I blame that there MM and her Aulay dog Smile .

Speaking of which. Oi MM Mrs your life is not ruined, it isn't a mess, you're an amazing woman who can achieve anything she sets her mind too. You're only guilty of loving someone who doesn't deserve it, hoping they'll change and putting your foot down when he is acting badly. You don't deserve domestic violence Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad . Its late now and I hope you're sleeping but tomo if you need anything just shout (am at a pal's wedding in Glasgow over lunchtime but won't be long as its a 'no kids' affair and need to feed J after), am here for anything you need including a safe place to crash for you, Aulay and Tilly. I'm dead sorry love. He's a nobber.

VQ we were advised twice daily as the dose wears off and if given 24 hourly the last few hours before a dose can be v sore. Hope the humidifier helps and sorry to hear about the soy.

GT I have a caboo I was going to flog on eBay if you want one cheap?

YellowWellies · 31/08/2013 02:48

Typo alert "Mind to" NOT "too". Wah anyone would think its nearly 3am and I'm tired.

Kirrin · 31/08/2013 02:54

((Hugs)) mm This is not your fault. No-one can say you haven't given this relationship your best shot, but he simply doesn't deserve you.

Glad you had a lovely hols YW Welcome back.

PennieLane · 31/08/2013 03:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YellowWellies · 31/08/2013 03:11

Pennie for us this regression is the longest but not quite the most brutal. Yet. Haha. Last night I put him to sleep skin to skin in my bed whilst I read then he did 6 hours on transfer to the cot. I think he feels in need of closeness at night now he's moving.

He's just spent ten mins shouting hiya and doing big celeb red carpet style waves at the cat. Daddy is now trying to settle him.

ValiumQueen · 31/08/2013 05:24

MM I am glad you are at your grans. You can do anything you put your mind to as you are a smart cookie. Except stay with him. Because you are a smart cookie and enough is enough. He will NEVER change. It is time to accept that. Time to accept he is not your Mr Right. Your Mr Right is out there waiting for you. Missing you. Loving you even though he has yet to meet you. (((Hug)))

J is regressing too. Crawling practice at 4am is not good for anybody.

Lily311 · 31/08/2013 05:46

mm there is no excuses for domestic violence. You don't deserve it. M doesn't deserve this. Please please take first steps. I am really worried about you and just hope that you had an ok night.

Good luck today chasing. I fixed all the furnitures myself when we moved in here, can I just suggest you use some kind of gloves to protect your hands.

We are off for children's concert today, it's some sort of health day here and lots of programmes for kids and adults. Thankfully it's next to the shop which sells dishwashers so will choose one. Bring on Monday when the plumber is coming to give me a quote.

Original poster
StuntNun · 31/08/2013 05:48

It sounds like everyone's having a shit night tonight. I hope you got some rest MM. And did you get a better night VQ?

I have given up on sleep after being up with J for two hours. Last night was bad too. I think we're getting to the end of what we can cope with now. DH has been in a bad mood with everyone since we got back last week. I thought a week's break would give him a chance to unwind and relax and recharge his batteries. But instead it seems to have had such a great time doing what he wanted - having his parents over for dinner, going running or to the gym, having peace and quiet - now he's so resentful of the children. The thing that worries me is how unrepentant he is about it. He was saying how badly behaved DS1 and DS2 are, that they won't listen. Then he said that J is a horrible bad baby because he won't sleep. Ffs DS1 and DS2 aren't that bad, they're little boys of course they're a handful. And it's not like J is doing it on purpose, he is a really shit sleeper but it's not as if he can misbehave at his age. I tried to say that their behaviour doesn't give DH the right to mistreat them but it's like talking to a brick wall. I really think in his head they're doing it to annoy him so it's alright for him to shout and swear at them, smack them and punish them and belittle them. God it sounds so awful when I put it down like that. I really think he loves them but he has no idea of what he's doing any more.

OP posts:
fruitpastilles · 31/08/2013 06:03

How are you this morning mm ? Did you manage any sleep at all? Why did he phone your gran? That seems like a very strange thing to do. Big hugs to you and Tilly.

stunt would your dh consider counselling? It sounds like he has a few issues regarding his own childhood from what you have said, saying that, he doesn't see them as issues does he? He thinks it's perfectly normal. I feel for the boys. My dad thought it was normal to behave like that toward me and my brother, he'd think nothing of bellowing in our faces and smacking us.

Sophiathesnowfairy · 31/08/2013 06:37

I hope you are ok this morning mm that really is a shitter. Big hugs. Xx

stunt that sounds like it puts you in quite a lonely place. Perhaps we should get organising our own Banbridge or Belfast Ikea meet up soon. Both works for me unless you have any other, better informed ideas.