Dec 11: Not tonight dear, I've got a haddock.

[PerilousStiletto]

I liked this one. :)

Hope you're feeling a bit better now xiao.

I didn't realise until today that all of my cookbooks are bread and cake themed . Jamie's new series looks good though so may buy the book or pop it on my Christmas list. The bbcgoodfood website is good and the source of my secret recipe for the worlds best scones. Their magazines are good too, they have a good mix of posh occasion food and easy midweek meals, we used to subscribe and probably will do again once we're in the new kitchen, current one is too horrible and uninspiring to make me want to spend time in there. I'm a believer that the best recipes are the ones where you just throw things together, or discover new things that work because you don't have the right ingredients. Yesterday's brownie was amazing, I didn't have golden syrup so used treacle, surprised how well it worked.

The MIL saga continues. Apparently next week I'm getting an apology, I guess we'll have to wait and see how much I think she means it. DH made the mistake of telling her me and the DCs will always come before her, so I'm wondering if she's only apologising because she knows its me calling the shots and I'm a lot less likely to back down than DH. She clearly hasn't learnt her lesson though because SIL still doesn't know. I'm torn between thinking she deserves to be told before she finds out from the village gossip and knowing its not my place to tell her .

I strongly urge everyone to sign up for the MN product test panel or whatever it's called. I put my name down to test a freesat+ box, and found out earlier that I've been selected. I have to leave feedback on a thread twice then we get to keep it, it's worth £226!

My DStepM and DF swear by Good Housekeeping (c. approx 1972 edition!) for recipes, and I have a very well-thumbed Delia (again one from the late 70s/early 80s) for the basics. Agreed about the BBC site too. One other thing I do is that whenever I find a recipe, anywhere- including made up- and have tried it once to see if it works, I add it to my own book. I've then got my own recipe book of family favourites!

Am up at this hour owing to the stress- the second house fell through. EA called yesterday to say that the sellers were in fact going with the other offer from the first time buyer/person who has nothing to sell. To make it even worse, I turned down an invite to go and view another property on Monday as I was going between home and EAs getting this house sorted, AND I'm now up North for the rest of the week and working the following Saturday.

Yay for relaxing holidays sob!

Sorry to hear about the funny turn Xiao, have they any idea what it is? I know pregnancy can bring a whole world of oddness, but especially given your physical problems at the mo I hope they're keeping a close eye on you. Mind you, it's only a couple of weeks to go isn't it?

Awful to hear about your relative hinky; it happened with my Grandfather before I was born, family were told out of the blue he had a couple of months to live owing to cancer, and he lasted three weeks. Come on here anytime to talk (hug)

seven, I wouldn't normally be so vicious, but whatever your MiL is giving you is not an apology. An attempt to regain control/ensure she sees the GCs/trying to keep family on board and quiet, but not an apology. Saying sorry should come from the heart, and be based on an understanding of what a person has done and why it's wrong- that's not what your MiL is doing. As you rightly say, the fact that your SiL doesn't know is very telling- and FWIW, I would tell her. Some things like this need to be known and override the usual nicities of who has a right to tell, etc.

Oh no northern what a bummer Fingers crossed another one comes up quickly again and you can view when you get back.

At the hospital they thought the funny turn was a migraine, but they didn't seem too sure and as I've never had one in my life both DH and I (and aethel who was a lifeline by text) were dubious. I think it's more likely that I'm getting bouts of low blood pressure, but when I get it checked out it's usually after a spell of sitting in the car/GP waiting room/lying on my back in triage and by the time they test my BP it's gone back to normal. They do always comment on how it's on the low end but I think everyone's so focused on looking out for high BP that low is seen as good and nothing to worry about.

DH looked at the symptoms listed here and I've got every single one of them, so I think it's pretty certain to be low BP rather than a migraine. Especially the confusion!! How often have I complained on here recently about my brain turning to mush? Anyway I'm staying in bed or on the couch today and doing nothing more strenuous than watching GBBO on iplayer.

Oh dear Northern :( what a pain

for inconsiderate house vendors!

I booked in DS for three mornings a week at the nursery starting in a few weeks. Looked at a second nursery for a yardstick and am happy I've made the right choice as the one we'll use is far smaller and seems more friendly and flexible. Slight leaving-my-child guilt but that's quite usual (and I know it will pass)....

Bleurgh and now I suddenly have calf cramps to go along with my constellation of symptoms...pregnancy may not be an illness but it's no joke. Counting down the days to 27th Sept...

aethel small, friendly and flexible sounds like the ideal three qualities in a nursery! Now fingers crossed for a friendly and flexible job to go with.

Today Boo was off colour so we did dull domestics. I bought curtain rail and a4 folders today. I gave up on finding a coat. Going to buy a tape measure and see if I can squeeze into the regatta one I have bookmarked. I'm fed up of being wet and grumpy all through the damp season! I need boots too as I suspect I chucked my walking boots last year.

Seven I would tell your sister in law. You were enraged you'd been kept in the dark, I imagine she will feel the same.

Aethel happy hunting, the nursery sounds lovely.

Xiao I hope you enjoyed the bake off, I caught up earlier, and we finished masterchef this week too. I'm not used to being so up to date!

And now the house next door to the one we've just lost is up for sale! At 10k more with a smaller kitchen!

I'll add it to the list I'm viewing week Thursday. Work don't yet know I'm taking that afternoon off, but it's a necessity.

Had a lovely day out in town with Mum yesterday; we're staying local today and going to the market, shame it's piddling it down... DS and DP up today, and I shall see them tomorrow

Glad the nursery worked out aethel- I do think it's one of these things where you walk in somewhere and just 'know' if it'll suit your child, and delighted to hear you're sorted. And as you say, time to roll out the MN mantra, this too shall pass....

Are calf cramps down to low potassium Xiao- time for a banana or 17 ? So sorry you're suffering with this, only two weeks to go! How is your DH feeling atm?

Sorry for me post but having a bout of feeling low. This happens to me fairly frequently since I had minim. I just keep on plodding. But it is hard sometimes. I should be really grateful I got a good job in my field but I just feel scared and stressed about the temporary nature and worried research isn't for me. I know that's totally irrational and I need to just do the job to see if I like it and it's prob just fear/stress talking. But yeah these bouts of feeling low are not much fun. I struggle a bit sometimes. But so does everyone and lots of you on here have way more serious worries and stresses than me so I feel guilty for even feeling this way. Ugh. Life is weird.

((((((hug))))) mopsy, it's so hard to have the uncertainty in acadaemia. When DH was trying to get his original post-doc I had the is-this-really-for-him wibbles, you just have to give it time and be aware that it's OK to feel stressed, a new job is a big time of change. Try to find something small you can do each day for a ten-minute oasis, whether it's an extra bedtime snuggle with minim, tending a plant, reading, dping your nails... And keep posting of course for virtual ....

got to channel the queenie today,serious housework needed. One barrier is whenever DS sleeps I'm meant to be doing work prep stuff! And my DIY wall is only a quarter white and then I got interrupted. Shall I call it Shabby Chic?!?!

Northern I don't know - I'm actually in the waiting room at the GP's right now, so I will certainly ask about potassium as well. We're lucky enough to have our GP surgery about 10 steps from the back door and you can almost always get an appointment on the day, so when I still had cramps this morning I rang up and got an appointment. So we'll see!

DH is feeling really nervous and stressed. When we went to the hospital day before yesterday he looked grey with worry (he is generally of the blonde hair blue eyed rosy cheeked persuasion so when his face goes grey and drawn it's awfully obvious ) I think he's counting down the days till my mother gets here - probably the only time he has really looked forward to having her around for an extended period - but it will be someone who can take responsibility for me if he can't for whatever reason. And then his mother arrives two weeks today for 4 days which will help him a lot as well, just the security of having your mum there for advice and she's an NHS professional as well so knows the system.

mopsy another hug from me. It's not at all irrational, you've just started a new job, you're making a big jump from one mode of operation to another, you're being judged on skills that you're having to learn as you go. I think academic lecturing is the only job in the world that you're just somehow expected to be able to do well without training on the basis that you've had loads of experience being lectured at and some experience doing some teaching that may not even be directly relevant. And on top of that, you're expected to stay on a research treadmill! It's a hard, scary task and I take my hat off to you for getting such a great position. I would just also say that don't forget there are always other options if you decide that you like the teaching and your subject but just don't want to be within a tertiary academic environment. This isn't it, forever and ever, if you don't want it to be. Make sure you get your 10 minute oasis on dr. aethel's orders

Love and hugs and good luck vibes to you all. Have a great week.
I'm signing off now. I'm going to find out how to turn off all roamy stuff so I won't look at email, or Facebook, or even Mn. I am officially ON HOLIDAY!

Have a great holiday peril

Xiao I hope the GP can help you, you're really going through it again aren't you? If it is low potassium then coconut water is also good, and great for hydration and for people like me who can't stand bananas

aethel I think definitely call it shabby chic, you just don't have time to do everything. I'm jealous DS still has naps so that you can get something done, the daytime nap has sadly departed from this household

mopsy come here and post any time you like. As ever, good advice from aethel and Xiao. I can just offer virtual tea and sympathy

Some kind of devil appears to have inhabited DS since yesterday afternoon. Today is going to be a long day. Hoping to emerge this evening still sane and without too many war wounds

Sigh, is there anything that can't be explained away as "normal in pregnancy"? GP was very nice but basically told me nothing she can do, only 2 weeks left so just put my feet up and rest, and keep an eye on the calf pain in case it's a blood clot (er...how would I know?)

I need to tackle DH on rewriting our wills with DS2 on the way but I really really don't want to increase his anxiety by making him think I'm planning ahead for something to happen to me!! Wonder if I should just rewrite them both, then just present it to him for his quick signature to be witnessed by the au pair without having to really think about it too much. They're just simple mirror wills anyway...

faffin hope he careens around like a mad thing and then collapses with exhaustion and you can have a rest - any chance you can take him outside for a good run somewhere? Or a stamp in the puddles? Not that I buy into the whole "kids are like dogs and need to run off their energy" theory, but sometimes it doe seem to be appropriate...

Oh dear xiao. you're really being put through it in this pregnancy :(

Thanks for all your kind words everyone. I keep wanting to cry but I'm writing a lecture instead. Hmm it will prob be a v dull lecture!

And now admitted to the antenatal ward overnight, Jesus H Christ on a bike they're worried about the continuous headaches that won't go away even with cocodamol so a night in on oramorph to see what happens.

Oh dear xiao, hope it is all OK. What a pain. And extra stress for Mr. Xiao too

Hope hospital is going OK xiao and that you've a good book or sth good on TV. Such a pain being stuck there, and woken up for OBS etc. Hope Mr. Xiao can bring you some acceptable food too! Hospital food

My word xiao, you don't dp things by halves, do you!'!!! Manly hugs for MrXiao and hope things settle down soon (or you get it all over and done with asap!) either way tale care and keep us all posted

Hey mopsy. your lecture will be FINE. You need to recognise that feeling negative will make you hypercritical, so you are being unfairly hard on yourself.

For aethel on gremolata... this just came up on my freely:

chocolateandzucchini.com/archives/m/2013/09/hazelnut_gremolata.html#more

feedly even

and sorry can't remember how to do a link properly

Thanks Mopsy.... Chopped raw Garlic, parsley and lemon zest then.... Why does that need its own name, it just sounds like poncey seasoning to me.

Jamie Oliver would be spinning in his "gremolata" if he saw today's offering to DH: tonight's dinner was leftover tortilla wrap (the DDs had wraps yesterday and two were left in the packet) containing fried pork-and-leek butcher's sausages, heinz burger sauce, chopped lettuce and grated home-grown courgette. Side dish was curry flavour Super Noodles. I hope at some point tonight Jamie will call to arrange delivery of an enormous flatscreen telly....
(it was yummy BTW)......

Excellent use of leftovers aethel! I'd the end of a jar of pesto with pasta and a smidgin of cheese. Bit lacking in veg but had homemade lentil and kale soup for lunch so I think I'm OK.

aethel you didn't strike me as the Super Noodles type.

xiao sounds like you're really going through it, I guess at least you're far gone enough that if everything was going wrong they could get baby out now without any problems, though I'm sure it wouldn't come to that. FWIW I suffered horrible nightly calf cramps with DD1. Plenty of calf stretches before bedtime really helped :)

The more local weekly paper comes out tomorrow, Saturdays was a paper for the entire region, we're waiting to find out whether BIL has made the front page or not. MIL is adamant its not newsworthy enough to even be in there. I've been feeling sick with worry all day when I think about it, so I'm drinking and starting to knit a coat for DD1 to take my mind off it.

I need to apply for a grant for a low-resistance trike for DS. He tried one on the advice of his Physio a few weeks ago, it was such an amazing moment, he's never been able to ride a proper bike or trike, he just gone on and off he went! The quote came today and its £2000 and obviously therefore not funded by the NHS.