November 2012 - The weaning adventure continues

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1772925-November-2012-Adventurous-eaters-food-refusers-and-everything-in-between

Oh I knew there was something else I meant to say.

I was shopping today when an older lady started cooing into the pram. She was giving it the usual when she said "so, does she sleep through?"

I said "eeeehhm. Yes, actually"

To which she said . . .

"Oh lovely! You know what? I laugh when I hear young people saying they can't get their babies to sleep! I mean, really? Can't get a baby to sleep?"

I was all at the same time.

Is she suggesting that all babies born to ladies of her generation did just sleep through? Or was she suggesting that us youngsters just aren't tough enough with our babies. Sadly I think it is the latter.

I wandered off and thought of how I could have told her about not being able to make p eat anything or take naps or have her nappy changed without flipping away and having to be held by one leg.

Life was obviously better back then

Pass I had my own 'could throttle a granny' moment today. Hopped on a bus to my sister at nap time thinking aha this'll knock the bear out, but no, the old dear sat next to me kept cooing, woooing and peepoooing at him. OK sweet enough and she might not see many people but...... Even after he shut his eyes. Even after a million hints from me that it was nap time and he was shattered. She even tapped his wee hand to wake him up. Can these folks really not remember how much you need your wee one to sleep!!!!? He only managed a 20 min nap (after she got off) when he could have had an hour so bath time was thermonuclear this evening....

Woo cloud forests... adds to wanderlust list.....

Speaking of naps, has anyone else's baby dropped some of their naps lately? O used to have two 30min naps and a 2hour one at about 2pm but this one now usually only lasts 45 - 75mins. He is now usually awake from 3pm until bed at 7 and bath time is often tearful. I'm hoping he is getting enough sleep but nap times are such a battle as it is that I am happy to take his lead...

Aargh YW! They obviously don't remember at all. I remember trying to feed P at a pal's. she was still bottle refusing and feeding her was an anxious task. Bizarrely (as she is wonderful in every way) she set her two lovely wee ones up with a number of fun toys to show P while DH was trying to feed her. It was horrendous and obviously she had just completely forgotten what some of these things can be like.

And cloud forests - foggy, damp and full of critters you can't see.

Yes chasing! This week p has gone from 3 to 2 naps. It is actually working much better for us. Her 'routine' is now:

Up at 6:30
Nap 9:00-10:15 ish
Nap 2:00-3:30 ish
Bed 7pm

This is rather than

Up 6:30
Nap 7:30-8:15 ish
Nap 11:00-12:15 ish
Nap 3:00-4:00ish
Bed 7pm

She just seems more relaxed and happier. She does fade a bit but rallies and seems much more content when I do pop her down for a nap.

After my trauma at the start of the week I decided to just follow her lead a bit. Now if she tires I change what she is doing, sit her on my knee for quiet play and so on.

Fingers crossed things seem to be ok this far.

pass I went in and met my colleague that said I should go so walked in with her. Work people appeared delighted we had brought babies. Lots of cuddles, more for her baby I may add but hey Ho. I don't know why they dislike me, I think my sick record could be part of it. I've had a shit time in the past and when I'm off its normally for a few months at a time! This isn't going to help when I don't return from mat leave and I'm going in for my op!

We have a child free night again as my sis forgot she was watching the kids last week to let me go shopping and so she felt so guilty she said she'd take them overnight! Yay! We had dinner out and I'm just enjoying a bat of green and blacks chocolate which has no milk in its ingredients bug does have a may contain label... Hoping that's ok! M so knew to this whole dairy free!

R sleeps where he falls, tbh. He has a self-imposed routine but i would go nuts being stuck in to pander to it, so he sleeps where he can - including his garden swing at my parents' one time but normally in the buggy, sling(s) or on me. If we're home and grumpy in the afternoon he gets fed in his sleeping bag and room and put in his cot - he tells me if he needs to iyswim. He has 3-4 of 30-45 minutes each - after breakfast on me, then around 12 and 4. Goes down for the night around 7:30/8 ish, wakes around 2 and 4:30, up at 6 (with dp)

Meals are: breakfast at 7 with dp, lunch 12:30 and dinner 6:30. He doesn't like eating unless we're at table and someone eats with him, funny little fellow! He was out with me yesterday and dp today, fussy with his lunch while out but gobbled it down at home, at table, with us!

Oh and chasing 3 until 7 is a long time but I remember p dropping herate afternoon nap and managing well withing a few days. She tends not to sleep in the buggy so I would entertain her for an hour and a half the we went to the supermarket at 5pm. She liked the fresh air and change of scene but it was low key so didn't wear her out. We have done this for at least a couple of months. Only now can muddle along without this trip out.

Babies are weird.

P sleeps like a superstar overnight but it would be fair to say that her reliance on sleep cues is pretty restrictive. Especially now she is older going out means she will be awake the whole time.

Actually, I was astonished to see her doze off in the car earlier - no dummy! First time she has done that in months!

You'd know pass he didn't move his arm. At all. We think he did it in his cot bars at night. Or playing. We don't actually know. I'm just guessing at night give his behaviour overnight and the screaming.

You know, I think people forget the random nights of waking up. My man pretty much did gf with all three of her children. They're fine. I'm in agreement with yw in that babies who now aren't sleeping longer than 20 mins or so at a stretch are in pain. We're programmed to sleep for longer periods.

izzy they sound like mooses. If it is genuinely because you have been unwell then they should try spending a day in your shoes. I am glad you went though. Their loss they had fewer J snuggles!

That sounds like an amazing trip yw (the Galapagos, not the bus ride). One day...

Glad today went well chasing. Try eBay for the books maybe?

Nightmare journey pikz

Izzy and bplp - how did you both get on today?

Babies are proper weird aren't they. And all so different, even at this young age.

Proper.

Took P with me to get my eyebrows waxed earlier. She sat in her buggy watching going "hurhurhur" whenever the wax strip came off.

Malicious child!

Pass and YW just . Fuck me. It's as if we don't want our babies to sleep, eh?! Twats. Time has a nasty habit of making people forget what they want to though, doesn't it?!

Horsey Poor little E :( I'm glad to hear he is fine now. What did they do for him? Clever mummy taking him to A&E though! Mummy instincts :)

Chasing O has dropped a nap - well, we kind of dropped it for him. He would have a short nap at 8.30-9ish on the school run - sometimes just 15 minutes. Waking pretty much as soon as I turned the engine off in the car . So while DP has been off I've not taken him to school many times. Now he will be ready around 9.30-10 for a nap, and has his longest nap of 2-3 hours. If we are going out, I wake him after an hour. He's fine with this. Today I woke him after 1hr 45. Then he has an afternoon nap. This varies in time, but will be between 2-3 hours after his previous one. This one we are often out the house for. If we are out we are lucky to get 45 mins whether it is morning or afternoon. He just power naps . At home his afternoon nap would be around 1hr - 1hr 30. He's usually awake by 4, and can do 3-4 hours before bed time. It does vary a lot. But I'd say he has a long nap in the morning, and a shorter nap in the afternoon. He was having 3 naps, the middle one being the long one.

We are still trying to introduce lunch here! It just isn't happening!! He's either asleep, or we are out and nowhere to feed him, or he wants a bottle, so isn't interested in food. Fuck knows how we are going to manage! Usually he's asleep though! We did swimming today 11.45-12.45. So too early for lunch before we left, and by the time we were all dry and out of there, he was asleep! Gah!

I've not stopped all day. I've been pushing myself harder and harder to get more done, in terms of physical activity. I think I am getting there. My fanjo is really aching tonight, but the good thing is, it wasn't aching in the day, only towards the end. And that was with me cleaning the whole of upstairs thoroughly haven't done it in oooh a good 10 months, it's been DP's job!!. I've sorted through all O's stuff, and we've packed away the swing, bouncer, moses basket and other things he won't need any more. Feel very sad, but not sad, because hopefully it will all get used again! I've even been super organised and made a list of what is where, and lists on the bags etc. .

I was supposed to be doing purees too, but far too tired and sore to stand in the kitchen too.

Oh. I flooded the dining room from the bath this evening. Filled it with bleach and cold water. Forgot. Overflowed overflow still gaffa taped up so I can have baths with my tits covered and was running out the dining room light straight on to DP's laptop. DP, the fucking pansy, screamed like a toddler! Still, what a knob I am for doing that. Was too busy cleaning the sodding wall behind the radiator . I'd kill DP for the same.

Izzy I totally know how you feel. :( There were 3 of u pregnant in my work, 2 due Sept, me Nov. When they left they got cards and presents - collections went around work. One had a baby shower arranged by a colleague. Then after their babies they got more cards and presents.

I got fuck all from work. Not a fucking sausage. Not even a bye. I just left after my last shift, and that was it.

Two colleagues sent a gift and a card after I had him. One of those people I then met up with for lunch when O was 2 months.

I've not heard from anyone else.

:(

It makes me feel like shit. But then I take it on the chin, because I'm not in work to make friends. I'm there to do a job. Friends would be nice, but fuck it.

Right, I?m here and I?ve caught up

Izzy How is the sleep going? M has regressed to waking every couple of hours for the last few weeks so I sympathise. I think she may be slightly reverse cycling with the weaning? Hopefully all the cutting out of foods will help in time

GT Sorry about DH, how is he now? I love Hs bedroom

Fruit Hope you?ve had a nice wedding today and that S looked lovely. Happy Christening for Sunday

kyz Hope you, your mum and your siblings are ok. Idiot man! Who would try ?hang themselves? with children in the house just for attention?

evil Glad N enjoyed nursery and yay for crawling. M is trying so hard but not there yet. She can get around without it though

Bry How is G and her chicken pox?

How are you feeling this evening chasing? I?m struggling with hayfever too and being stuck in all week has made me feel a bit crappy. On other notes I may be down your way next month

Pass A few weeks ago M was babbling on saying ?Abba? over and over, v cute, it was Eurovision day as well so quite apt. She still says abba a lot and a noise that?s like mama and sometimes a squeal that sounds like hiya She also likes to dance if you stand her up or if she?s sat she does happy, dancing bounces while singing to herself
How are you today madame (((hugs))) for your shitty day

Aww horsey Poor DSs elbow

Naps? Routine? What?s that? Ours is all to cock at the moment.

detective and izzy work are twats

to everyone i've missed, M woke for a feed mid post

Now off to write a selfish ?me? post ?or go to bed and post in the morning--

R woke. V hot and drowsy. Rocked, walked, cuddled, stripped off sleeping bag. Sat down to feed - vom. Thick, lumpy, smelly variety. Fed, back down now.

Poor little dude

This week has been a bit turd. Nothing in particular and nothing in comparison to what some of you are going through.

M seems to have fully regressed and is no longer in any kind of routine, it takes ages to get her to sleep at night then she?s waking for a feed every couple of hours. Then she?ll sleep until 9am. I keep saying I?ll get up when she wakes at 7:30 instead of letting her go back to sleep, then hopefully she?ll be worn out in the evening. But when DH goes to work I?m so shattered with it all that I just fall back to sleep until she wakes me again at 9/10am. Then because we?re late up it messes all food times up.
She?s also a nap refuser at the moment, she just suddenly doesn?t like her cot and will get quite hysterical. So I?ve been either getting her to nap by rocking her in the car seat or she?s fed to sleep on me so I can?t move or she?ll wake

This in turn has led to me getting stressed about housework and other jobs I want to get done. I just don?t feel like I have time and I?m struggling to be laid back. So then when I get in bed at night I have a million things running through my mind. I was hoping DH would have M tomorrow for at least the morning so I can get some things done but he?s working until 11:30 and then going to cricket at 12:30. I feel bad but I feel like I?m stuck with her all the time, I love it and I love her but I just want some time to myself but then I feel guilty I feel like all I do is watch M, battle with M to get her to sleep, feed M and clean up after M.

We haven?t been out much this week so I know that?s making me feel worse.

On another, sadder, note. We found out last weekend that a man that played cricket with DH died. He was only 28 He only played with DH for one season and then moved to Derby but he met his wife her (a friend of a friend). He had bad cancer but only found out 6 days before when he felt ill and was rushed to hospital. I just feel so sad for his wife, they only got married 6 months ago and he won?t be here to share their 6 month anniversary. I don?t know her well but I?ve sent her a couple of messages, I don?t want to seem like pity but just wanted to know I was thinking of her. I feel bad but don?t feel like I knew him well enough to feel bad, we hadn?t seen him for 5 years. But I just can?t help thinking what I?d do in her shoes, life is so unfair! I?m sorry lily if any of this is too close to home

I?ll finish up on a more ?light-hearted? annoyance. MIL and bloody purees
There?s nothing wrong with purees, we?re just not really doing them. We?ve done a few to start off with for firsts tastes etc but M loves to feed herself so we?ve been doing more of a finger food style. We have done some fruit purees as I think freezing them makes them go further and I mix them with yogurt, Weetabix etc.

Anyway, MIL either doesn?t listen or can?t grasp. We must have had the same conversation a few times?..
MIL: So is M having puree for tea
Us: No she just has what we?re having
MIL: So you just blend it up?
DH: No, she just eats what we?re having
MIL: So you just mash it up then?
US: No. She just had the same food as us and feeds herself
MIL: Oh right
A week later, the same conversation

So last week she tells me she?s been to the adsa baby event and she?s got some of those "whatsit kitchen" sachets. Right, says I, but she doesn?t really eat puree. Went for tea last tues, we?d packed some finger food veg and hummus for M, DH goes to kitchen to prepare. MIL says ?But I?ve got M one of those sachets for her tea?. So DH just says we?ve already brought her food.
This weekend she tells me she?s been to the supermarket again and bought some more sachets for M. Went for tea this Wednesday, take some food with us, get there and there?s a Heinz pouch sat on the kitchen top waiting for us

I?ve nothing again purees or the pouches. But I?d rather give her the fresh finger food I?ve got, plus I don?t think she?d eat a whole pouch of it. And I don't want her to waste her money when M isn't going to eat it.
Sometimes I feel like I?m banging my head against a brick wall. I love MIL but sometimes I don?t think she takes it in

In contrast we?ve been to my parents for tea and they?ve cooked veg that they know M can munch on and even cut the carrot into batons instead of disks so M can enjoy it too.

Jesus that post is long, but I?ve had minimal ault contact his week so you?ll just have to put up with my moans

Fatima - he is not great... Been itchy and out of sorts all day and very uncomfortable this evening. He has lots of spots but they haven't properly blistered so jury is out as to whether it is pox or some other virus with a rash.

Sorry to hear about the vom pidj. I had the pleasure of plucking a regurgitated strawberry from my cleavage earlier. Nice.

Oh no Poor minibryz
We makes some chicken pox lotion at work, I should have stocked up on it so I could dish it out to suffering babies

This in turn has led to me getting stressed about housework and other jobs I want to get done. I just don?t feel like I have time and I?m struggling to be laid back. So then when I get in bed at night I have a million things running through my mind.

Sorry if this was the wrong thing to pick up on from this, but I do this, too. And I've found a trick that seems stupid, but is actually really hard to do but really works. Keep counting "one" as you breath in, and "two" as you breath out. It's almost impossible to do for any length of time, but if I keep pulling myself back to doing it every time my mind wanders, eventually I just forget the noise.

Det I've been at my job 6 years. And since being on mat leave, no one has tried to see me other then one teacher who went on mat leave not long after me. Ppl who I thought I was close to have quickly forgotten about me.

Fatima. Massive post! FH is much the same as usual. Spoke to his sil today. Was quite frank with her about how it's been, told her what I'd tried. It was good to get it off my chest but now my mind is just doing a "now what" thing. She thinks I should go to gp. But what it comes down to is HE has to want to change. And I don't think gp will give me any advice.

Just in a bit of a head fuck about it. It's just going around in my head and I can't get it out and I'm surrounded by brick walls.

And now in just babbling not making sense.

Awww Fatima - the first and last bits of your post sound familiar. My mil can't get her head around finger food either and keeps telling me about Ella 's kitchen as though it is a great new invention. She is very excited by it!

And I also feel like I spend my time chasing around after the kids. Sometimes it works well and I feel like supermum, other days like today it is a real battle. Dh works most days inc weekends and has never actually looked after both kids himself. Still, I want to stop work now, and one of us has to earn some money.

Sorry to hear about your cricket friend. I think something like that can just really rock you and remind you how fragile normality is.

2am and I still haven't managed to get to sleep
And now I'm thinking what's the point as M will wake for a feed shortly. Then I wonder why I can't get up in the morning.

And right on cue she wakes up