October 2012: onwards, upwards and rolling over?

[YompingJo]

Is this part 5 already? Where did that time go?

Yep. Although DD is breastfed and they are planning to go in the summer so she would still be very little. It comes accross that there are some favouritism issues from FIL although I give him the benefit of the doubt and think he may just be unsure around such a little one. DS is very close to his GP and has been their only GC for 6 years until DD came along.

oh tricky one. in one way it is a kind offer but only really for your ds, and it's obviously not the family holiday you mere hoping for, unless you put it to her that the holiday was for your ds? I'd struggle with this. what does your dh reckon?

Mates over for the night + stayed up an hour too late (10.30pm! gasp) + new memory foam mattress (hate hate hate, is going back to shop) + boyfriend and mate discussing football in booming voices till 1am + giant poonami at 2am + tears + thrashing jess sleeping my arms as too tired to resettle in basket + leaving stupid memory foam mattress to sleep on the fucking floor = tired squid

Going out for lunch with mates, then my parents are coming. am going to give them jess and cry, fall asleep and have sex. Hopefully. not sure which order.

Bora no way! I think four friends have had babies since Jess (has been a crazy year for babies) and each time I feel smug that Jess is older, more settled and more interesting

wantanorange I would be sad and not want to do it unless it was a family thing. But explaining that might be a minefield. Not helpful, v braindead, sorry. But you are not being unreasonable, as they like to say on mumsnet...

Hmm, I suppose I did put it that it was for DS's benefit but I meant that he would benefit from a holiday with his parents and siblings! I've been collecting vouchers from local newspaper that do cheap holidays but we are pretty limited as to where we can go. Oh I am worried that I am being really selfish but I can see things getting even more OTT if I dont nip this in the bud soon. I'm starting to feel like he isnt even mine anymore.

orange put your foot down gently then. thank them kindly but let them know how much you were hoping to spend some quality time with ds. maybe be honest about how hard things are with new baby for your relationship with ds - I can totally relate. get your dh to back you up.

I think you're right. I'm trying to write a reply that will convey both gratitude (because I know its a geninuelly kind offer) but makes it clear I dont want this! DH is being a nobber and not interested really.

I've started with:

Hello. Sorry I didnt get back to you yesturday, we were out all day and I didnt get a chance to get online. That's a really kind offer but [DH] and I would like to take [DS] on holiday ourselves, to get some time with him.

Its times like this that I really wish I was a grown up...

Wantan I'd feel a bit undermined I think- like 'you can't afford to, but we can' sort of thing. I'm sure that's not how it's meant, but I sometimes get treated like a poor relation in my family and I do find it a bit insulting.

I think maybe I would stress that as it's the first summer with the little one that you really are wanting to plan something for the whole family to do together but thank you, you're very kind etc etc. If you get on well with your in laws, could you suggest a weekend away for all of you?

my annoying baby wasn't hungry just now but sucked just looking enough for the milk to start flowing. Now my nipple is stuck in the on position and I'm just sitting here holding a towel over it till it stops spraying.

London Thanks, we are all going away together for a week anyway and I know that if I suggest on a weekend away they'll insist on paying which just makes me cringe but I like the idea of explaining that it is because it's our first summer together.

Had to laugh at milk spraying. DD tends to suck for a minute to get the let down, pull off, wait for it to squirt everywhere then go back on again.

orange I regularly wonder when I'm going to feel like a grown-up too!!! good luck with it. hope they understand. sorry your dh isn't helping

Londonmrs ds2 does that frequently. drives me mad. thank god for Lansinoh breastpads!

Londonmrs snap my baby just did the same - in a restaurant. She was like, ooh milk, oooh fuck that far more interesting things going on around me. A large 60th birthday party group adjacent to our table were all cooing at her while this happened. I am beyond embarrassment these days.

Sent the e-mail. Thanks for your help.

So. Um. A cuddle got a bit carried away... someone who co-sleeps please tell me you've had sex when the baby is there, they are way too young to understand right .... BAD MUMMY!!!

bora my brother and sister in law had their first baby this week, went round for a cuddle of this teeny tiny beautiful baby boy and felt very jealous, I really don't know why either, I can barely cope with two children never mind two!

FFS. Do all your boobs let Down and spray like that?? I'm sitting here expressing on a v full boob. Been half an hour, got less tha 3 oz. Drip drip bloody feckin drip. DS has just happily gobbled 6 oz formula for us to be sure he will still take medela teat and won't freak at formula. No bother there greedy little sod So here I am with this feckin full milker......

This is on my good side, lol! Half hour expressing dodgy side might cause irreversible damage!!!!

huffle some days my tits are just speaking right left and centre and I have to wake up and pump a couple of times in the night. other times they feel fairly normal. doesn't help that some days I have a monster feeder and some days she hardly wants anything. means my supply never gets a chance to settle and frankly it's making me quite miserable.

squid I've had sex in the same room, but not in the same bed... I feel fairly certain they won't be traumatised by it. how was it? all healed now?

think I meant spraying. they rarely speak.

Squid - yes, we DTD with DD there yesterday. She was in her side car and wasn't bothered. The sound of the Lamaze toys I'd shoved in to keep her entertained were a little distracting though I can assure you she was completely unaware. My child stares at her own hands in amazement. I don't think this is an issue

@ chatty boobs!

Mine have never sprayed anyone, feel a bit left out! Never had to use breast pads thou - on flip side if I pump I'm lucky to get an oz.

Baby wooly turned into ultimate cling monster, usually happy to be held but anyone but at family lunch yesterday just cried and cried (with proper little sticky out bottom lip) if anyone except dh or I picked her up. Swimming today also tearfest...

We are right under the big black cloud on my wonder weeks chart....the only way is up right! and then back down again in a few weeks but let's not think about that yet

Mine rarely speak to each other too, London. Think of they did they might share ideas and work a bit better??!

Why are men so stupid? DH taking DS for a walk to help him sleep. This has been talked about for nearly 45 mins since I said he is starting to get tired. Cup of coffee. Check news on iPad. Phone someone. Meantime I'm putting DS in pram, despite fecked back. DS screaming with tiredness. Mummy unable to lift and cuddle.

"any chance of this walk?"
"give me a smile, I know your back is sore "
"he is getting way beyond tired now, this is not what we are trying to do"
"och mummy, don't be cross, try and smile"

I'll fucking smile for you you fuckwit.

So they're away for a walk, screaming baby. Would hav been better to hav a happy awake baby gently nodding off after a bit of a nosy about, no?

Off to try the expressing again now that I'm so relaxed

Over 6oz formula in this experiment. Wouldn't u think that might fill DS up for while? Not 2 hrs later he is back on boob. How much does he actually bloody take?? I've not a mission expressing for this boy.

Moan alert...

Been in a bad mood all day with dp. Fed up with clearing up after her all day, as if 2 children weren't enough - if I have to put away one more bloody pair of shoes, never mind the 3 bags of sports kits that seem to be a permanent feature of the living room...

Hi everyone! DH has been away this weekend - still is - and I was babysat by MiL. I'm very grouchy, DS is very grouchy and I think on reflection, having had help all weekend now just makes me feel all unsure about what to do with DS next - like I've lost all confidence again. Parenting is so annoying.

Can't say very much as DS is quite grouchy and have been typing this since this morning but

• have had a revelation about sleeping issues that involves hot water bottles and pretending the bedroom is a mud hut. The hot water bottle is mostly about how he'd wake up when i put him in his basket or cot from my arms - the change in temp was waking him up so it's been a revelation to put him down asleep and he stays asleep! I bet y'all worked this out ages ago..i can be quite dense.

• we DTD last week (it hurt) and Friday (it was better) and in the throes of passion, DH suggested another baby

• babies turning the nipple tap on and then wandering off is hilarious!

• want well done on the email

-squid we did plenty of non-deed stuff with ds next to us before we managed to actually DTD - sure it's totally fine!