Determined, you really need to scale back that cleaning regime! I know Fly Lady provides framework for slackers to do more, but could you reduce your cleaning to that?, and be assured that it is an adequate level? Or you could start your own thread (being Grande Dame of a MN perfectionists-trying-to-be-more-slatternly clique (or "quiche", as theses things are called) could also boost your self-esteem. You could haveinspirational posts like: "Today, I spilled milk and left it fr5 minutes and 55 seconds!" OR "I look atmy newborn more and don't spot the dust" 
)
Perfectionism in general is very bad news in a mother, including for thechildren - not something I make my children tolerate, of course! 
Please think of the state of our house, and desist! I say "our house" very deliberately: it's not mine, and although I end up doing the housework, I don't feel it's only "mine", and in the long run, I want to make Dh take back some responsibility for it, and to make the DC pick up some responsibility. DS already puts his clothes in the laundry basket, and I make him wipe up his own spills. After marrying a Balkan man, I don't want to take any chnaces with DS. Even though DH has a regrettable interest in "outsourcing" childcare to his mother, and she always gcooks extra for us, and even brought some food this weekend (mind you, that was nice, and very thoughtful of her, saving me the cooking time with DD and DS around!), it has got him in the habit of roasts, so he will cook them when she is away for the warm months. He's also really impressing me at the moment, with his getting up to get DS sorted in the mornings so I can sort DD, breakfast and DS's packed lunch. I'm not saying this to boast, just to show that even an East European man can pull his finger out and pick up his share of domestic things, even when he has a lot of work on (he was working at home till 0530 thismorning!)
seven, that's awful about MIL's thinking BIL would kill himself without her. What the hell is she thinking~?!
NorthernChinchilla, I think your filing perfectionism can be excused, as it only has to be done once, and it saves time for later... NEITHER OF WHICH APPLIES TO HOUSEWORK! 
BTW, with regard to the job stress, I can recommend a book called [[http://www.amazon.co.uk/Death-March-Yourdon-Press-Edward/dp/013143635X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1331032822&sr=8-1 "Death March", about dealing with being in an under-resourced, over-spec'd, too-short-timelined project. It is based on IT projects, but I found it relevant to some of my work! His big managers are idiots if they work like that. I know bankers are meant to be bastards, and they also tolerate failures they shouldn't, but one thing they do seem to have right is the setup my DH has been in at various banks (he came from the IT side, so don't worry - he;s not actually a banker): between the IT side (programmers, quants, etc.) and the business users (traders, sales people, etc.) there is an interface, the "business analysts". They make sure they understand the requirements of the business side so they can work with It to iron the bugs out and not bother the people who are busy making money (they don't like to be interrupted), while being able to tell the business people up front what is and isn't possible technically. It seems to be quite a good setup, as it reduces frustration on both sides, and protects each side from unreasonable demands. If he is looking to move, that is a much better set up to be in.
Lovely news about your heart-to-heart, hawthers! And about the bigger clothes!
Coolhand, I know that temptation; I was always out and about in the day wth DS (the pleasures of a spring baby!) and establishing daytime sleeps was... tricky. Yet I'm coddling DD, too, as it is very often impractical to do a lengthy wind-down for her.
AirofHope, poor Hope! Are you just creaming her, or are you wet-wrapping as well? Gievn the time that all takes, I'm not surprised Air has regressed. If it makes you feel better, my DS regressed when we moved house (about 6 months after training, compared to Air's 6 weeks or so - Air is still new to all this). Leave the family out of it for now, as it sounds like they will create more stress and make demands.
Your DH sounds as though he really deserves that lovely tribute you made to him!
MissRee, your buggy did look very substantial when I saw at at the meetup!
BeeMyBaby, I am with you on the smart phone thing! I still haven't found one, though...
Is the tooth better, mopsy?