October 2011 - Let the poo obsession begin

[PenguinArmy]

Come chat, moan, boast (by stealth of course), vent, rage, relax, worry and be reassured. Welcome to all the new babies. Stats thread here

Finding it hard to keep up with thread and sorry for self absorbed posts. Dh back at work from today miss him.

J is finally asleep on me, she Was awake from 8.30 so near 3 hrs. Nights not too bad at all, tends to feed 10/11 and goes till 2/3 and them to around 5/6 so every 3-4 hours. We all slept in till 7.30 and j stayed asleep till 8.30 so managed to get ds2 sorted for preschool and have a shower.

Sorry drivelling on. Ds2 been quite poorly with cold cough bug but better today. J has snotty nose and snoring away. Ds1 absolute star and walked himself to school and was already dressed and breakfasted when I woke (he's 11). So proud of him.

She's only 3 weeks but feels like she's always been here, anyone else feel like that? X

awen that made me smile, I wrote pretty much the same on our family blog when he was 2 weeks old. Not that I'll be updating it much anymore.

So today it me two hours to get us all fed (DD twice , porridge and toast, DS at least twice obviously), dressed, nappied (not me) and out the house. We did however do the park, drop in centre and singing class and I got a decent amount of sleep last night. Something tells me the whole week won't be this easy.

I'm still in shock that he's 5 weeks old today, that's over a month where did that go!!

ps I know our blog is a bit wanky but we were in the US away from family and we're still a few hours away from both families so it's for them really.

It's not wanky at all penguin! I have to agree at the time flying by - last week when we got to three weeks I thought it felt more like 3 months but now it's four weeks it seems to have gone so fast.

awen I am struggling to keep up too. I also miss my DH. I have got horrible cold/cough etc which is making things more challenging and DD has got sticky eyes which I have now cleverly managed to transfer to myself. MW said to keep them clean and it should clear up but now I have it I can feel that it hurts so I think we're off to the doctors.

Sorry, that is all about me and my woes. Welcome to all the newbies that I have managed to ignore.

Hello! I've made it from the AN bus at last!

Lovely to be here, have scanned the thread but will read it properly later.

Elizabeth Amy arrived, in a bit of a hurry by emergency c-section on Thursday evening. We got home last night.

Quick question - what is cluster feeding? Tonight I feel like I've been feeding solidly from 7pm till now - four and a half hours. She's on for five mins, off, doze for a couple of minutes, then crying and rooting for more. She's very restless.

Do you ever leave a newborn to cry? Are they able to sooth themselves to sleep? Are hiccups to blame?!! All advice warmly welcomed .

Looking forward to catching up on the whole thread soon.

Hello again MrsH (and any other transferees).

In my limited (2.5 weeks) experience of being a mother i would say on the crying issue it depends. I leave Seb to grizzle but not to cry. there is usually something wrong, it's just a case of working out what!

Congratulations MrsH!

I don't like to leave a newborn crying. Have has to on occasion for a couple of mins when desperate for the loo!

Also, in my experience newborns can't self soothe, it takes a few months to learn. But that could just be my (3) boys!

MrsH we don't leave P to cry because it's my understanding from reading blurb that when they are as small as ours are they are too young to self soothe, although as Tally says my experience is very limited (5.5 weeks). P has been left to cry sometimes but only if we have been in the car so can't do anything about it or on the toilet etc. I generally try to pick her up asap as otherwise the dog would try and help her which wouldn't be great!

Hiccups and wet nappies dont bother P enough to cry and I am not very good at telling the difference between cries (DH can tell) so I feel a bad Mummy about that. I usually check her actions to see if she wants feeding and if not P just wants holding as she is quite a cling-on baby.

DH has got the Babies Mumsnet book from the library and I would recommend it ladies, it's hilarious plus there are good pointers in it.

I took P in to town on Friday and ended up very stressed in the end, had to feed her under my hair dye towel at hairdressers and in some random room at Primark. Needed DH to take me to the pub once I got home :(

Morning all mrsH welcome to the bus... Re crying personally i'm with the others, I'll let them grizzle as sometimes (especially ede) they will settle themselves but not crying. Obviously if I'm alone I can't always get them both straight away if I'm feeding one but I'll attempt to soothe then in other ways (talking, singing, patting with one hand) until it's safe to pick them up. I once left ds to cry in his cot and after 5 minutes he was breaking his heart with sobs and I couldn't take anymore I went to get him and he was so distraught he fell asleep in my arms instantly and was wimpering in his sleep the whole time and I felt like the worst mother in the world. but lots of my friends did controlled crying and have very happy babies although I dont think they did it as new new babies but I'm not sure.

My little girls are 8 weeks old today! How did that happen?!?! We have their jabs first thing and I'm going to take them to get weighed (oh they'll love me for that!)

Dh has taken the day off and informed me this morning he was staying asleep until 9.30 - ah let's just say he did not!!

Good luck with the weigh-in BB3. We had our 4 week appointment yesterday and Max decided to pee all over me when he got on the scales (DH had been holding him 2 seconds before...why doesn't he get DH once in a while?!).

M's collarbone seems to have healed but the side effect is that he now prefers to put his head to the left and is getting a flat head (haven't been able to lie him on his right side and when he's on his back he always puts his head to the left). Doctor has referred us to a child physio to help, and she's coming for a home visit on Thursday.

Am waiting for my mumsnet guide to babies to arrive Cheshire...now I'm looking forward to it even more!

Had a bad day yesterday...M wouldn't stop crying and I just couldn;t work out what he wanted - he was clean, fed, burped. Normally I can deal with it, but I just burst into tears. Think I was just frazzled after the weekend. Sounds weird but I find M is always more unsettled because there's less structure - we head out or we tend to have more visitors. I'd expect it to eb the other way round since DH is home and helps out with M so I can get on with other things. Anyway, wound up weeping in the nursery, and again when DH got home. managed a nap in the evening and felt a lot better...DH has made me promise that when M is asleep during the afternoon, I'll have a sleep as well, which is what I'm off to do now...

yes that's cluster feeding MrsH welcome to the fun.

controlled crying of whatever is for when they're older really, sometimes life conspires against us and I have to leave DS for a bit e.g. car or big sister. In the beginning I picked him up at every whimper but now starting to leave him but still picked up before he cries proper. He's starting to consistently do a little sleep on his own and last night there was actually some space between me and him.

engel was thinking about the collar bone last night, glad to hear it's mending well. DD didn't start to get flat head until a bit older but its easily fixed and you've loads of time to get her used to her other side.

I had a little cry on Sunday, I was well slept, it had been a good day and DCs were fine. DH said one bad thing and that was it. I do find me emotional state is linked to sleep, either mine or DDs.

Hi everyone and welcome to all the new arrivals! Is that everyone now?

To all those feeling down (but not with PND my sympathies Jnice I hope you're getting some help) I think that sleep deprivation plays a massive part in it. If it's youre first baby then sleep when the baby sleeps, DO NOT spend their nap time doing housework or washing, just REST! (Best advice I never took myself and I was run ragged when DD1 was tiny.) For those of us with older DCs, erm I'm not sure how I'll cope actually, I'm planning an 8pm bedtime when DH goes back to work

DD2 has started evening fussing, and rarely allows me to sleep much before 2am when she tends to settle down and do several 2-hr stretches. It's fine at the mo as DH is dealing with DD1 and I'm laying in bed until gone 10am. I am living in hope that her sleep will settle down soon. And she's still in bed with us for the moment.

I am loving having a little baby to snuggle It's only when I can't settle her for the umpteenth hour at 2am that I think what have I done.

I used my pump tonight for first time and think I've left M no milk she's been fussing from one breast to the other for 2.5hours now and I'm shattered!
When is the best time to express?

Edward - If I want to express I feed on one side for 2-3 feeds so the other boob gets really full them express that side off and alternate or I'll express off both but not so they feel completely drained (although I've been assured by many you never 'run out' as such).

Xx

Thank you ladies, good advice. It's a lot less stressful now we've decided not to let her cry! We hadn't let her cry before but were beginning to question ourselves. Much easier night last night.

Things have been easier the past few days, I have tried to be more helpful with other 2 DSs, which makes me feel more connected with them and Dh is less fried. I think I was mostly upset by his stress levels and lack of sleep. The sleep is still am issue though - L will sleep one long slot and 45 min to 1 hour slots for rest of night. Problem is the longer slot has shrunk to just over 2 hrs now

Feeling less like pnd and jus stress/sleep deprivation

Catching up on posts now!

I never wanted to cosleep, but it's now approaching 4.30am and I know he'll sleep longer in bed with me than in his bassinet. At this rate DH will never get to leave the couch. Anyone else facing this dilemma? I never slept with my other 2.

Sleep is my top priority for now I suppose, but it seems the more I sleep with him the worse our nights get as his sleeps in the bassinet get shorter and shorter. Last week he would go 4 hours, tonight he's had one sleep less than 2hrs and a few 20 minute catnaps

Jnice - we are co-sleeping for the moment - feeding lying down and DS just seems to doze off so not having to settle him back to sleep in the night is great.

He tends to start the evening off in his basket - I will have fed him downstairs and then settled him in it. THen we go to bed. Then when he wakes up I will do the first bit of a feed sitting up in bed. Then a nappy change. Then I turn off the light again, lie down with him, and do the second bit of the feed like that. We both then just drop off. It makes it much easier really.

DD was the same - we did the same thing until she was 2.5/3 months. Then at that point we started a bedtime routine - bath at 7, feed, then into sleeping bag and basket. She slept in her basket (and later, cot) all the time from about that point.

PS the length of his sleeps may have nothing to do with whether he was in the basket or the bed - they sometimes just do go longer and sometimes do just go shorter! My DS two nights ago was feeding every 2.5 hours. Last night he did 11pm to 5am . Who knows what tonight will bring ...

ARGH!

Can't even cosleep tonight, he won't settle at all!!! I have been awake since 1.20am and it's now 5,48am. Just had to give him to DH for 10mins so I could sob and scream quietly in the bathroom.

Now feeling resigned to more sleep tonight, and considering a routine where I don't let him sleep longer than 2 hrs in the day plus feed on the clock to make sure he feeds every 2-3 hrs daytime at least.

Deep breaths!

Thinking about it, he must be reverse cycling or whatever it's called. Too much daytime sleep. He has good stretches in the day in his carrier or on me in bed. 2-2 hours sometimes.

Anyone had this and fixed it?

Bumps, thank you is good to know that you can choose when to quit cosleeping, it's not something you're bound to forever.

I think the idea is to expose to lots of sunlight and avoid long sleeps in the daytime. There's loads online but here's what kellymom has to say (just because I know it has a section).

I tended to express either 45 mins after last feed when she feeding two hourly. Mornings are better for a lot of people as you have more milk then normally although I did late afternoon/early evening. When DD would feed from one side then I'd express the other side at the same time or just after.

Anyone getting bad neck or back ache, normally from the cluster/cry sessions.

Snap on backache!! My upper back has been agony since M was born!
HV said this morning that early morning is best to express, after posting this morning I realised she had a blocked nose so think this was the problem not lack of milk.
She seems much better now I've elevated one side of her mattress. :-)

How did you elevate it edward? Did the hv say to do that? I've been debating rolling a towel and tucking it under one side to help with wind/ snuffly nose....
Is anyone else suffering from spots? I seem to be revisiting my teenage years at the moment not good for my self esteem - spots, stretch marks (that came a week after I gave birth!?!), the odd leak when I sneeze and a wobbly tummy....definitely not feeling like a yummy mummy.