september edd new babies arriving come share the ups and downs here

[ssmile]

Hello. Think i was first to deliver off the September EDD thread so waving to see if anyone else out there yet to join me :)
Had my 2nd DD on 26aug by C-sec. We now home but struggling with BF and baby lost 10% body weight in 3days. Started to top up with formula in syringe to try give cracked. Bleeding nipples a rest, but milk is starting to drip out now leaking everywhere! Hoping for a better night tonight after 3nights of hourly feeds and snatching 2-3hrs of sleep.
Anyone else struggling too?

Grrrrrrr been up since 12.45 babe just won't settle, having one of those nights just want some sleeeeppppp please .......

Oh ssmile that sucks for you :( hope you her some rest soon

Hope u manage 2 get plenty of rest 2day. No sleep sucks!!!!

Hi All... well drew up a chair to this forum about 2 weeks ago and haven't posted since. Bit like Hazelnutte (who I send Congratulations too) haven't found the time to post as found the first couple of weeks quite difficult. Am loving being Alys's mum, but have also struggled with a few things too. First week, my DP got D&V one night so had to stay away from me and Alys all the next day, then the washing machine and dishwasher packed up, so he spent the next day plumbing new ones in (thank god for online shopping...!) Then, I got an all over my body rash (but thankfully gone now) and spent one evening last week throwing up everything I'd eaten myself...

Alys has one from sleeping really well, to having a few nightmare nights where she doesn't seem to want to know about sleep (ssmile - know how you feel... hope you got some sleep in the early hours or at least some today). Was getting het up about her screaming at me and the lack of sleep, and trying to breast feed at night, when you put on her and within five minutes she's asleep. So you take her off and gently put her in the moses basket, to find she wakes screaming as she's still hungry...

But, on reading here, I've now gained the confidence to say what the hell, I'm not breast feeding in the middle of the night... it just stresses her and me (and the DP) out. So, am going to try and express one bottle a day to give to her at night, and top up any other night feeds with formula. I know Midwives / HVs wouldn't approve and will go on about breast feeding comes with demand feeding etc etc, but for our sanity I'm going to do that. Had a much better night last night by doing this...

Got the HV this afternoon, and am hoping Alys has put more weight on. She was going up at the last weighing, but not quite enough. She's 2 weeks and 2 days now so hoping she's regained birth weight... fingers crossed...

But, the thing I've most been dealing with is turning into a nightmare person at night... think lack of sleep and frustration turns me into some sort of monster to my DP... thank god, he sees through it and has just been the best. we had a good chat on Saturday, and since then I've calmed down a lot, hoping our new not bf'ing at night strategy is helping... and I'm really hoping it's not the start of Post Natal Depression. I had the baby blues big time when I came back from hospital - started crying at the drop of a hat... but that's calmed down a lot now, so it's not that. Just think I need to chill out a bit more and remember you don't have to do everything by the book...

Reading here is so helpful, as there are so many second/third time mums with tonnes of advice, and it's so good to see how everyone else is doing, and knowing it's not just you going through things. I will now keep reading here and posting as much as I can as it's such a support...

So, hopefully, I can pull my chair in at the table and join in...

sebs 3rd time mum here. With both our 1st 2 they had the occasional daytime bottle (my dh useless at night and id b 2 lazy to get up and make bottle) of formula- out & about or 2 enablee 2 go out & dh feed them. Im sure hv was ok with that, tho its whats right 4 u & lo anyway :-) so dont feel guilty 4 it!!

Sebs you just have to find what's right for you. Its very easy for others to dismiss and criticise but they don't know how certain things affect you and so shouldn't comment, but they still will. Hope ur new routine works well.

I get a bit [grrr emoticon] with conflicting winding advice. The nhs book says it's not a big deal then other people say it is. LO has wind but often in the pants area as opposed to burping, sometimes she squirms until she farts other times farts come with no warning. She's not crying, I try and burp her post feed but I don't want to 'force' the burp or just keep trying for ages if it's not coming. Just trying to play it by how settled she is post feed, if she's arching or not feeding well I'll keep going but if she's settled I'll try a little bit and if no wind I'll stop. Wish I knew if she definitely needed it or not. She's breast fed, but whether that actually makes a difference or not I don't know.

Turns out DTD 3 1/2 weeks post episiotomy isn't all that comfortable! Think we'll leave it a little bit longer then! dammit. :( it hurt quite a bit :( but I was also a bit tense it being the first time iykwim. Still we've tried and will again, enjoyed the closeness though:) (and the non hurty fun bit)

LO is sleepy head today. Lots of snoozing so far and had a pretty decent night with her so going to do a bit of kitchen stuff, ie making pie for tea and biscuits :)

100 with burping just do wots right 4 u. Ir lo sounds the same as ours there. I dont try burping 4 v. Long. But with our 1dt 2 i had 2 spend ages trying cuz otherwise theyd b uncomfy!
Sorry 2 hear dtd was uncomfy, ur brave as tho i want 2 i dont think my bits would b quite ready yet. Perhaps try using a lube 2 (anne summers or a chemist or superdrug), perhaps a plain 1 tho rather than anything like durex tingle

not happy with dh!!!! As i left 2 get dd from school i told hom lo needed nappy change & a cuddle as i put lo in moses basket. Over 30mins later i opened door 2 hear lo crying, it stopped by the time i got 2 bedroom where i found ds1 had just put a cardboard box over lo's head, still in basket, same dirty nappy. Dh asleep on bed, called his name a few times, had 2 shake dh's foot 2 wake him up. Dh then told off ds1 4 card box- but he was just trying 2 play with lo. NOT happy with dh @ all!!!grrr!!! Other than wen i get tatoo wed am dh will not b left alone with lo 4 a long while! & his paternity leave started 2day. Not helpful @ all,.esp as i know i''ll b the 1 getting up to the kids everynight & getting them all ready & doing school/nursery run every morning. Am now thinking a dc4 will NOT b jappening. Y do i think 'oh things will b different this time' wen i should know nothings ever going 2 change! :'(

Thanks both. HV been this afternoon and seemed happy with me giving her a bottle at night. She's put weight on, but still not back at birth weight, but HV thinks she will be by end of the week. So still feeding every 2 hours in the day. But she seems happy enough.

She keeps throwing up milk though, again asked the HV who just said it was possetting, and nothing to worry about. But it seems quite a bit to me, but then i'm probably over-reacting.

100years - I'm with you on the burping. Since introducing the odd bottle she seems to be a lot windier! And that includes rather loud farts too! But she doesn't seem to burp very much when I try and wind her after a feed either. I just try and wind her as much as possible, and the HV said that some of her behaviour when she latches on (i.e. she fusses around a lot and sometimes looks like she's teasing about latching on, then finally latches on after about 5 minutes) could be due to her feeling windy, so I guess I must try and wind her more when she's kicking about a lot before a feed. It feels a lot of trial and error, and even then, what works one day doesn't always seem to work another day. I'm just hoping that things settle after about 4 weeks...

And, yes, brave to DTD... I want too, but have read not to do whilst there is still lochia happening due to risk of infection. Not sure how much of this is true? Plus, still feel a bit tender after C Section, so not quite ready yet.

Jimmi - hope DH helps out more then, particularly if he's on Pat leave now!

Jimmi yes I was thinking of using lube too, OH is a teeny bit put off trying again for a while, I'll not say what the suggestion to practice beforehand entailed! Thanks re burping. Sorry ur DH has not helped you today :( wish I could offer some advice but I can't.

Yeah sebs my LO does the whole 'playing with nipple' thing and yep I think she's windy then so I try wind then. Glad hv was fine about the bottle thing :) not sure about the lochia thing, mine is quite infrequent now and only when I've been doing lots of stuff, mw just said do it when u feel comfy and never mentioned about lochia.

Our lo also pulls on and off breast and gets fidgety wen he has trapped wind, i think knowing these things helps us cope with them much more calmly & rationally.

100 i am an anne summers fan (even have his signed autobiography :-) ), not quite sure wot u meant but know my bits def would not b rabbit'able :-) lube should make it much more comfy 4 u

just dyed my hair brown cuz got bored of my usual dyed red, looking 4ward 2 seeing the result & how it goes, as even permanent reds fade quickly. Getting (small) tatoo with dc's names on wed & lo's initial added 2 1 i already have, will xcpress a feed 4 lo while im gone, will b his 1st bottle feed :-) only i dont know how much 2 express. How many mls do 3& a bit week olds normally have?
Will b strange not playinv mummuy 4 a few hours after having 2 dcs whole of summer hols & lo ever si!!

Yes the suggestion did involve a toy! My initial thought was lube his was to do a test run with a toy! Blushes madly at actually discussing this so much, well actually I'm not blushing that much )

My LO takes anything between 60 and 80 mls in a feed, depends on how long it is since I fed last. Hope that helps.

Jimmi is it ok to have a tattoo done while you're still BFing? My tattooist said that he wouldn't do it coz of the risk of infection so I've been holding off having DD's birth date added but I might just tell him I'm FFing so I can have it done. I've also got one on my wrist which is kind of little people holding hands representing my family so I need to get DD added to that as well. DH went last week to have his done (we have matching ones) and I'm as they were my idea originally and he's copied them!

Thanks for trying out DTDing on our behalf 100years ; now I know to wait a bit! Ever since DS was born I've always needed lube when DTD (except when pg); I read somewhere that it's normal to be a bit - ahem - dryer once you've had a baby although I dunno why.

I'm glad to have provided a service to the post natal women in the thread

Well after me saying LO seemed ok with wind and not too bothered we've had an evening of her in terrible discomfort at least an hours crying and 'screaming' poor little thing. She's not long settled, took her last feed an hot ago and not cried since and is sleeping now so fingers crossed she is ok now. Horrible for her :(

Sleep time now for me hopefully :)

100 colic?
fera tat sounds nice :-) i used 2 hate tats, dh had sed he'd get 1 yrs ago. Then i went all sentimental, got 1 & got addicted (got 3 so far) & dh has none!! Myn r only small tho so noone can c them in my work uniform.

Does any
1 else know anout getting a tat while bf? I may ring him up 2moro, tho will prob lose my deposit :-(

WThis will sound like silly question but do any of you put your Lo down to sleep awake? All the books say put them down awake yet if I do that she just whinges then crys she certainly doesn't go to sleep. The only way she sleeping at moment is after a feed and cuddle and last couple of vchallengingnights lying next to me with nipple in her month. I so want to avoid the sleep deprived hell I had with DD1 I am wobling on my "oh just fed cuddle on demand" advice prob as just tired and lo been vdiff last couple nights maybe its just growth spurt as she is 5.5wks.

Hope your having better nights x

Ssmile - no I don't put her down awake. It takes a feed, winding, lots of cuddles then when her eyes have been closed a while I'll put her in the basket, with dummy, and lots of rocking. May take another bout of cuddles after that too if she's griping. But mine is only just over 2 weeks. Can't imagine putting her down awake and her going off yet... Though that would be grat and I know I'm supposed to work to this but she seems too young for that yet. But not sure what age you can start to do that?? Trouble is like you said, you're too tired yourself to try things out and just need to get them to sleep in the quickest way!

So tired this morning and c section wound really aching too - need a quiet day!!

100years - your poor little one. Mine got a bit like that last night but not so much in pain more agitated. Hope you got a settled night. My HV mentioned infacol for colic - you might want to try it. We've ordered some so haven't tried it yet but may help your LO.
Jimmi sorry don't know about tattoos when nursing.....

sebs plenty of ibuprofen & paracetamol (all i got after cs 5.5 yrs ago)
ssmile our 1st went down awake with a dummy, our 2nd wouldnt go down @ all- he'd wake up as soon as put down, but was fine wen he eent in seperate room @ 7ish months, not putting him down awake doesnt seem 2 have affected him. This lo can fall asleep aline, but @ night co sleeps 4 a few reasons (& all i have 2 do 2 feed him @ night is roll over!)

Shocker- dh got up 2 my alarm, asked me if i was ok, i replied with the same question- in the past (other than wen iv been @ work) even if hes got up 2 take dcs 2 school/ nursery its me whos had 2 get them ready& hes just rolled out of bed minutes b4 leaving. 2day he got them cereal. Tho dh ignored the rputine i told him me & ds1 have had for months, resulting in tears. Dh sed ds cant get away with getting wot he wants all the time- wen u get them up everymorning then u can pick that argument with him. I have 3 dcs 2 get ready & this routine works 4 us. Ds1 isnt a morning person, whats wrong with letting him eat his cereal on the sofa with his duvet, teddy & a drink-hes not even 4 yet!

Jimmi I'm not sure if it's colic or we don't usually get it, she was exceptionally windy and very bloated in her tummy. I was thinking of getting some infacol to see if it helps and then gripe water when she reaches 4weeks. Was proper screamy cries though :( Glad ur DH got up with u but not great that he didn't stick to the routine, LO is only my first and I know from others that keeping a routine is essential when they are a certain age.

Ssmile LO has fallen asleep a couple of times in the Moses basket if I've left her once by chance changed her bum put her in it so I could wash my hands and sort out changing table came back she was asleep. But as for at night it just doesn't work yet. I put her down for a bit and leave her but as yet the only way she sleeps in the cot at night is if she's fast asleep on putting down or on the very verge of falling to sleep. A wakeful LO and sleeping without feed hasn't yet worked for me. But we are introducing quiet time in the cot in prep for the putting down to bed. We use the Moses basket in the day and cot at night and so far she sleeps well in both when she's sleeping :)

Sebs I spent a lot longer winding post feeds last night after the evenings problems and she was mostly settled thru the night. Didn't sleep quite as long but less of the furtling grunty trying to fart noises so I'm going to keep it up for a bit. She seems easier to burp now after last night too, weird. I am going to get infacol (see comment above to jimmi) sorry ur LO had an unsettled evening too.

Got friend visiting this morning and hosp app this afternoon so I'll catch u all later.

Thanlks for feedback.think my lo is the change time she 5.5wksand the pattern we had last wk completely changed. She not falling asleep after a feed any more which is why I asked. last time 6wks was period of change, feed spurt, sleep changes. I assuming thats what's going on! She mostly been awake since 5am her longest period awake since birth, awake all the way down to school 50mins in pushchair! Normally that rocks her off and all yester morn she would not settle unless held so i just sat and watched tv mostly as at 10lb5 too heavy to hold much now :) muscles in arms developin nicely.

Talking of size ssmile our lo was eeighed over a week ago # 20lb 2oz, i reckon he must b 11lb ish now. & poss due 2 being born 55cm long,.is just over 3 weeks old & already in 3-6month clothes!!! Glad i hardly brought any newborn stuff!!
Time 2 get up & try ringing tatooist c if i can get them done :-/

Ssmile, I have put DD down awake a few times in the spirit of experimentation; sometimes it works, sometimes not. At night she generally fidgets when I put her in the bed nest so I lie her on her side or front and stroke her back until she drops off (this didn't work with DS until he was about 4mo). Mostly during the day she sleeps on me though, and if she's too fidgety at night then she just goes to sleep in my arms.

Jimmi, there seems to be some conflicting advice about BFing and tats; this thread's quite interesting. The mention of metals in the ink might be worth asking about, although I'd just go ahead with it if it meant losing my deposit as most people seem to say it's fine.

Re colic, I've been giving DD a slug of Infacol in the evenings and it seems to lessen the projectile vomiting. Gripe water was awesome with DS once he was old enough.

Thanx 4 link. I rang tatooist who didnt have a clue, sed 2 ring dr or pop in2 boots & let him know wot they say, after googlinf it just found so much conflicting advice :-(
Just made my 1st ever cheese scones. Fil actually asked 4 more- he's such a picky eater 2! :+)

I have used infacol in the past with mixed results. For ff babies I found colief alot better but not great for bf as you have to pre-mix it into the milk unlike infacol that you give to the baby before a feed. I also wanted to give some advice re projective vomiting. My older dcs had reflux and eventually the gp gave us something called ranitidine which limits the stomach acid and really improved the reflux and vomiting up of milk. If you are concerned speak to them about it don't just suffer or listen to the hv as I did that with dd1 and should have got help - such a difference with ds1.
I am so sore on my csection scar today and think I have overdone it today. I am nearly 3 weeks since op but have been driving for 4 days now and doing alot of housework. Went out shopping today with mum and just walking around a few shops really caused alot of pain. Really hope it's calmed down by tomorrow. In the morning me and lo are off to the Tongue tied clinic to see if they need to cut the Tongue tie - I hope not !
Finally made the decision to move ds1 to new school and I am so relieved. We told him yesterday and went to visit the new school and he has taken it well so far - I know there will probably be some problems when it's not exciting anymore but I am so looking forward to having a double school run to local schools rather than the hour long driving and parking nightmare I am currently doing.
Just heard tonight that FIL is planning on coming to visit and meet lo - just hope it goes okay. We were so very close but since mil died 6.5 years ago our relationship had not gone well and we just don't seem to get on that well - so sad as we do love each other but we just don't get on that well. I am so tired at the moment I am not in a good place to cope with any adverse comments. It's sad how such a happy event like the birth of a baby can cause so many cracks in families - I am still waiting for my twin brother to come to meet lo (my brother and sil live round the corner from me - they could walk here in 5 minutes) - brother has texted and called once since the birth but sil hasn't texted, phoned or even sent Facebook comment and they haven't even sent a card. My mum and family are really angry and I am struggling to make out that it doesn't matter when deep down I feel so hurt.
Sorry for the long post but needed to get that off my chest.
Ssmile sounds like your lo os having growth spurt - happens at 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 12 weeks and 26 weeks roughly and until they settle again it's always a little shaky.

Minky - I'm nearly 3 weeks post c section too and my wound area has been hurting the past couple of days. Perhaps it's something to do with what's healing at this stage although like you have increased what I'm doing housework wise so maybe it's just overdoing it. I was told not to drive for six weeks as insurance would be void for that length of time too.
Getting some infacol on shopping delivery tomorrow so will see if it helps with the sicking up.

We've got appointment on morning with LO to assess her clicky hips. Hoping it's slight and she won't need a frame.

Minky- sorry to hear about your family issues. It all comes out with a birth. My mil has been up wednesday till yesterday although she stayed at DP's ex house in the village. Couldn't fault the help she gave re cooking and cleaning but she only held LO once and showed little interet. She even stayed at ex's on the weekend when kid went there and ex is there (we have kids all week and ex is away all week. They go there weekends when she's home). Was weird for DP to have his mum stay with his ex all weekend. Plus his dad decided to not bother visit this weekend - so god knows when he'll meet his new grand daughter. Guess neither are baby people but it does hurt. families!!

LO looks like she's falling asleep in my arms so will try put her in basket now!